RE: To Cyber or Not (Full Version)

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LuckyAlbatross -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/7/2007 5:13:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Noah
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Cyber is a great way to meet people and have good connections.

Cyber is a horrible way to form realistic expectations for an offline relationship.



... for you.

Nope.  That was an intentional universalization.




CelticPrince -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/7/2007 5:28:37 PM)

marie,

Does not the odd feeling go away as you become closer to the person and look toward a real time meet?

CP




CelticPrince -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/7/2007 5:34:36 PM)

cjenny,

Horray for your success and it is that progression that I point to.

But alas, your right there is as I said in my original post, alot of anti folks here.

Thier loss, methinks.

CP




CelticPrince -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/7/2007 5:37:50 PM)

bandit,

of course the 1st meeting can be a loser, perhaps she was disappointed with you and it was reflected in her attitude.

The point is that cyber is simply a building block and one can make it as the choose.

CP




CelticPrince -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/7/2007 5:39:47 PM)

meatclever,

That is a point that should be brought up even before a cyber session.

CP




bandit25 -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/7/2007 5:43:06 PM)

She who?  I never said I met a woman who was disappointed in me.  I simply said that one can get along fantastically online only to find that the spark isn't there face to face...




CelticPrince -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/7/2007 5:59:36 PM)

bandit,

your correct, I made a wrong assimption, sometthing that I am guilty of at times.

CP




CelticPrince -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/8/2007 10:34:34 AM)

stevi,

good points, but there is also the interim with allows both.

TM




LaTigresse -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/8/2007 11:47:37 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver

Cyber is for suckers, the only real sex is r/l which is why so many cyber subs (so I am led to believe) run a mile (or at least turn the computer off) when meeting and real sex is brought up.


This pretty much sums up my personal feelings on the matter.




Leonidas -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/8/2007 1:12:04 PM)

It's something that's just passe.  Ten years ago when Assho...oops, I mean America Online first invaded the 'net, everyone was "doin' it cyber style".  For the first time in the history of humanity, you could interactively pretend to do the nasty with someone you didn't know in the privacy of your own home with just a phone line and $19.95 a month.  Times change.  Things get old. 

All "cyber" is going to do for your friend is give her yet another way to fantasize about things she hasn't done yet.  As soon as she does any of them, "cyber" is going to seem pretty dumb.  No, it's not a way to get to know what someone would be like face-to-face, either, for the most part.  The "Master" she's cybering with probably doesn't know any more than she does, or he'd be past "cybering" too.  The story that repeats itself over and over and over is that the "cyber Master" turns out to be nothing like he seemed online when and if you finally meet.  Partly because he was just acting out a fantasy too, and partly because you just idealized him in your head because "cyber" leaves a lot to the imagination.




mymasterssub69 -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/8/2007 1:18:28 PM)

cybering is great however it gets too old too fast.

i would rather have a face to face ...body to body relationship




steviemichael -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/8/2007 1:31:17 PM)

I would suggest cybering is for those who are not a *slave* too the vistual but instead as the gift of being creative.
and just what is my point ? you can look like a million dollars but still be a lousey D/M/s




HatesParisHilton -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/8/2007 9:01:54 PM)

well, even though many skirt around the issue, cybering is many times just a way for people to get off when they have no intention of ever meeting even if they know the other person is - at the end of it - looking to meet.  All people?  No, but for those that DO con people like that (of any variety and background), sorry to make a declaritive all encompassing statement, but they are no different to men who take off their wedding rings and troll singles bars in r/l or women who pretend to be single and flirt to get free drinks.  and DECLARITIVELY, those are both bad people, sorry, because they abuse trust.  If you need time and might need a fair amount of cyber to feel comfy with a meet, that's okay, but if you know ou have no intention of meeting and know the person you ask to cyber with IS single and wants to meet?  Sorry, you are scum.

on the flipside, before anyone thinks I'm totally anti cyber (which I am not), with good people versus the male "playaz" and female "drink ho's" (sorry guys and gals, you all know they ARE out there and use the net too), cyber can be a great thing, and may in fact HELP lead to a meet and a session even faster than YOU might be ready for, LOL.

This has happened to me more than several times.  It's not always the male who's in a rush to meet.  In fact more than twice I've had to ask for a bit more "q and a" before ph. #'s are exchanged and/or a meet. Men have to be self protective as well.

Another thing to bear in mind is that we should not limit cyber to the contexts in which it's been presented in this thread.  No one has spoken of "accidental cybering" yet, nor the value of it.  Dunno what I mean?  here ya go ~

non sexual or romantically oriented message boards.

things like sci fi boards, writing boards, even antiquing boards, you name it, "hot and heavy good stuff" happens off those.  In fact, IMO, more often than boards DEDICATED to "naughty".  Why?

you don't know you'r flirting.  That's almost always the most effective flirt.  You just act like you don't give a damn about anything, only speak on non-naughty topics that matter to you in a way that presents you as a MIND a SOUL and as a PERSON, and yet, subconsciously, you tend to let your "kink undies show".

And someone who wants to give ya the good spicy stuff almost ALWAYS notices.

Then they play with you a bit on the boards, even though you may not know it...  They flirt a bit, their fetish comes out between the lines, then yours does, before you know it...

2 people are hankering for a meet WAY faster than the traditional "send messge to this profile" and e-mail banter based on the premise of both people being on "this naughty site" and maybe you write some erotica for them, maybe you wonder about the time and effort there.  But then, as you're questioning "should I write page 5?"

They e-mail you and tell ya, "I'd like to know how soundproof the walls of your place is."

I don't need to explain that to anyone here.

If I do, you ain't ready to meet anybody, LOL.

So there ya go, flipside on positive reasons for cyber, but like I said, like r/l flirting in vanilla land, often, accidental works better.

Best to all.




CelticPrince -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/8/2007 10:10:31 PM)

HPH,

you certainly covered alot of area pro and con // thaks for that input.

CP




MasterHXB -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/9/2007 3:14:10 AM)

Cyber is a fake way to stay in a fake relationship. So many have done this to be in a bdsm lifestyle for some reason they can't be in one in real life. I omit I tried my hand in this area. Its a fools game and asad one at that.

I don't believe in mentiong as well. A person who mentors another in the bdsm lifestyle is a person  not good enough to be one's dom/me. One should just live their oen life and learn the ups and downs of living the bdsm lifestyle. No one here including me with 32 yrs exp have all the right answers.




MasterGremlin -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/9/2007 9:01:18 AM)

My Master and I met online and cybered for along time before W/we met in person.  W/we were both honest and upfront with everything.  W/we also both knew that since I was new at the time when W/we did get together things would have to go alot slower in real life.  I found cybering very stimulating and exciting.  It was a great way to see creativity, compatibility etc..
W/we will have been living together for 9 years and married for 8 years come June.

Sincerely,
minxy [:)] 




CelticPrince -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/9/2007 10:49:41 PM)

HBH,

I agree that no one has all the answers, but if you stop and think on the subject, if the answers that are given help, then it is a good thing.

But to each his/her own.

CP




CelticPrince -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/9/2007 10:53:41 PM)

minxy,

Yours is a model relationship and one that I would point to as a living example that it is a great precursor for a relationship.

Good Fortune to you both.

CP




FelinePersuasion -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/10/2007 1:20:44 AM)

YES!
quote:

ORIGINAL: bandit25
Haven't you ever gotten along fantastically with someone online and when you met that person, the "spark" just wasn't there?




FelinePersuasion -> RE: To Cyber or Not (1/10/2007 1:25:19 AM)

Not nessisarily, I go along with a lot of things Daddy james says when we're having masterbation time, that I would not agree to in real life, however to be like but but but would just ruin the mood and end my show. And I don't want him to stop "the show" just cause I got all objectionable on him. Daddy knows that though and does not hold me iron clad to anything dureing our little sessions.
quote:

ORIGINAL: all4yourplsr

and it definitely lets you know what the person might be into in r/l. 




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