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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:04:42 PM

kindaeasy69

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Quivver

suck more dick...........

For you Dom's sake don't follow this advice, it's not nearly as fun as it sounds.

P.S. You have more mail.

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:04:51 PM

DominaSmartass

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Kate, what you are experiencing is very similar to other things (like you said) such as nail biting, hair pulling, skin picking, and more. They are called "body focussed repetitive behaviors" and they are more common than you would think. The most helpful treatments for people who really, truly want to stop (or at least decrease) is behavior modification therapy type stuff. One suggestion is to keep a little basket of toys around the house, especially in the places you normally would suck your thumb, like around the computer or tv. Things like koosh balls, silly putty, stress balls...anything tactile. Chewing gum or sucking on a hard candy might also help. I have had some experience with family members with similar issues before and one discovered a method of relaxation called "tapas acupressure technique" or TAT. You can google some of these terms and find a wealth of information. Whatever you do though, try to help your dom understand that it's not just a bad habbit. Asking someone to stop doing a body-focussed-repetitive-behavior is like giving a smoker a lit cigarette to carry around and telling them not to smoke it. Your body is always there and the behavior is or at least WAS at some point in time, serving you a purpose whether it's comforting, relaxation, or stimulation.

Goodluck!

edited to add: I also want to agree with Magikslave on this one and say that if indeed it's not something you can just stop, period, then maybe he will be more understanding and accept it as just one of your things. Everyone has something, seriously, they do. And if sucking your thumb doesn't interfere with the rest of your life and you don't do it when you should be doing other things, then what's really the harm in doing it? I know it's supposed to be like the dom's word is final and you don't need a reason other than he says so, but we're not living on Gor here (no offense, lol.) This is the real world. And unless he would prefer you take up a much more destructive behavior, maybe it he would be ok with you just limiting your thumb sucking to certain times, as you mentioned. Oh yeah, one more thing. You could ask him to help you by coming over and taking your hand out of your mouth when he sees you doing it and giving you a kiss, or any number of things.

< Message edited by DominaSmartass -- 2/11/2007 8:14:42 PM >

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:04:52 PM

adaddysgirl

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Well, i will be 50 next month and i still suck my thumb (on occasion). Sometimes i do it when i get stressed...sometimes to fall asleep. Every dom that i have been with i have told ahead of time and it was never a problem. As a matter of fact, a couple of them even liked it.....lol.

For me, it really has nothing to do with being being a 'proper adult'....or doing it in public...or it being embarrassing....it is just a 'relaxant' (hey, keeps me off of meds!)

Whatever you end up doing, i would be interested in hearing. Best wishes with it

Daddysgirl

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:10:46 PM

adaddysgirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: kate

right now...as i am writing here...i'm sucking on a magnet...i have eaten 4 chocolate bars today trying to kep my mouth busy, lol...i'm going to gain 50Lbs!...but yea, i'll go out tomorow and get a new crosstich or learn to knit or something.....i hope the magnet works so i don't blow up like a blimp, lol

i am curious....why a magnet? Does a magnet do something in particular to help? Or is it like a hard candy that just never melts? lol

DG

< Message edited by adaddysgirl -- 2/11/2007 8:35:32 PM >

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:10:53 PM

kate

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wow, i want to thank everyone so much....so many good ideas and to those who are also thumb suckers for there experiences..... there is a movie called "thumb sucker" that i saw last summer...i was wondering...this seems to be a female thing....no men have opened up and said that they do it....maybe it is just not something guys would talk about, i don't know

the magnet is just something with no sharp corners that is too big to swallow by accident

< Message edited by kate -- 2/11/2007 8:12:49 PM >

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:12:44 PM

blushingflower

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My college roommate had a boyfriend who sucked his thumb.
We used to say that he was so whipped he would do what I told him to, so maybe it's a sub thing... ;)

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:16:37 PM

SCDommie

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I have to agree with Quivver on this one. I had rather see you all smoking cigarettes than sucking your thumbs. How about a loly pop? That is how I quick smoking cigarettes. I had to really want to do it. I know you can do it.

SCD

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:17:43 PM

domiguy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: kate

does anyone have any more suggestions or stories about how they did something like this?...anyone else ever asked to stop a habbit like this be a Dom?....

When just laying around keep your thumbs up your ass.

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:19:00 PM

adaddysgirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: blushingflower

My college roommate had a boyfriend who sucked his thumb.
We used to say that he was so whipped he would do what I told him to, so maybe it's a sub thing... ;)

Hahaha! i religiously sucked my thumb until i started smoking at 15. Then i 'needed' it less (thank god for smoking....lol).

my younger brother sucked his thumb for years...then my mother put something on it....so he started sucking his index finger. He was at least 12 the last time i saw him asleep with is forefinger in his mouth. He ended up marrying a very dominant female (that's why the sub thing strikes me as funny). He is now 44....wonder if he still does it?

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:21:47 PM

adaddysgirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy
When just laying around keep your thumbs up your ass.

i think a lot of people already do this D.G.

Daddysgirl

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:30:45 PM

kate

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i have gotten some good advice this evening...thanks to everyone...i'm heading to bed, but if there is lots more when i get up...all the better :D:D

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:31:07 PM

MagiksSlave

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LOL like I said in an earlior post here Im just waiting for someone to start the "why do all subs suck their thumbs" thread

LOL

Magik's slave

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:33:06 PM

DominaSmartass

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quote:

I had rather see you all smoking cigarettes than sucking your thumbs.

I'm sorry but if you are serious, that's really pathetic. Smoking cigarettes causes cancer, lung, and heart disease while sucking your thumb causes...wrinkly thumb? Plus, as all the posters have mentioned, they don't suck their thumb in public or in front of anyone, or likely not in front of anyone outside their own home, so you'd likely never see it anyway.

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:39:04 PM

nectarine00

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I always sucked my first finger and twirled my hair at the same time. The hair twirling stopped when i started giving myself bald spots, and the finger sucking stopped after about 3 years of fighting with my parents, but I was 9. My brother is 15 and still does it, and I thought HE was bad, lol.

The major thing that worked for me was orthodontic work. But actually keeping a metal finger cast or a metal pipe elbow thing worked, because it didn't let me fit my finger in my mouth.

Try chewing on pen caps. It's something to keep your mouth busy, and it satisfied my oral fixation after I had to stop with the finger. Just be prepared to have to start buying only clicky pens to stop though!!

*click click*

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:41:02 PM

corsetgirl

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I also had a very bad habit of sucking my thumb and did not stop until I was 5 years old. I went to see a dentisit who gave my parents and instructed them to put some liquid on my thumb that tasted really bitter. The dentist also advised me to put my hands underneath my pillow. At that age, I truly wanted to make an effort to stop because I was just starting school and did not want the rest of the kids to make fun of me. Before stopping this habit, my dad would flick my thumb or put tabasco sauce on it. To this day, I still like spicy sauces - lol. Consequently, my bottom teeth are very crooked as a result of this past habit.

Perhaps you can see a dentist to help you with those problems who can help you overcome this problem..

< Message edited by corsetgirl -- 2/11/2007 8:42:08 PM >

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 8:42:32 PM

MagiksSlave

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass

quote:

I had rather see you all smoking cigarettes than sucking your thumbs.

I'm sorry but if you are serious, that's really pathetic. Smoking cigarettes causes cancer, lung, and heart disease while sucking your thumb causes...wrinkly thumb? Plus, as all the posters have mentioned, they don't suck their thumb in public or in front of anyone, or likely not in front of anyone outside their own home, so you'd likely never see it anyway.

I was thinking the same thing but was ignoreing him based on the fact that that was the stupidest thing I had ever seen... Oh no my 3 year old never ever sucked her thumb I niped that in the butt by lighting her up her first ciggerette!!!

I wonder sometimes about the intelagence of some statements and if they are realy thought through befor that ok button is hit.

Magik's slave

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 9:02:20 PM

kate

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well, i'm back, i coulden't sleep.....some more good stuff

tomorow i am going to buy some gloves of different kinds and make an apointment with my councelor.....but for now...i have the night to get through....and it looks like it's going to be a hard one

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 9:08:27 PM

MagiksSlave

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Hon if you are unable to sleep because you need your thumb then this is going to be an issue.... you really need to talk these things out with your Master and find something that will be a REASONABLE goal for you and not one that is gunna stress you becaus the more you stess the more you will need you thumb it is a cycle you dont want to start

Magik's slave

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If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.

-Rodney Atkins-

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 11:07:09 PM

Jdudette

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The difference between stopping then and stopping now is that now you should want to stop because your Dom asks it of you. Don't tell my master that I still bite my nails..

J

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RE: hard habbit to break - 2/11/2007 11:13:55 PM

Wildfleurs

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Using fast reply....

I liked LA's post that said that it really does take a certain amount of time to get out of the habit of doing something. I kicked my nail biting habit (though I'm not as good about my cuticles, which is something I'm trying to now get better about) just by counting how many rimes I did it over time... but it did take time to do.

I think the important thing to do is look at it as a goal.... not something thats going to happen overnight (and I wouldn't give up after one night and proclaim defeat to your dominant). I'd also make a clear decision about which is more important... adjusting to what your dominant wants or giving into an addiction (and no offense but an addiction thats usually kicked before adolesence kicks in). And once you've made that decision try not to look back or second guess the decision (which I'd assume will be to try to kick the thumb sucking).

C~

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