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Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submiss... - 2/14/2007 2:07:55 AM

SirDiscipliner69

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Joined: 2/1/2005
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Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was adminsistered in a session even though it was within the submissive's consent and limits?

Wouldn't this be an abuse of trust and responsibility?

Should a dominant intentionally physically hurt, not emotionally hurt?

Is harm a perception or a reality and how is it defined?

Can giving a submissive discipline on a regular basis be percieved as harm as a co enabling of an adictive personality?

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

Post #: 1

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 6:28:13 AM

MaryT

Posts: 553
Joined: 12/8/2006
Status: offline

If the Dom thought medical care was necessary, he/she would be remiss not to take the sub.

I hardly see how it would be an abuse of trust and responsibility, unless you are seeing a scenario where a submissive's safeword would not be honored regarding medical care. Regardless, the Dom would not be allowed to sign the consent for medical treatment at the hospital.

You know what really bugs me? People who post question upon question, especially those that present sweeping generalities and rather half-baked scenarios, but offer none of their own opinions or ideas. What are your best answers to your own questions, Ross?

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 2

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 6:35:08 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
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Why do you only ask questions?

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 3

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 6:39:10 AM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

I was thinking the EXACT same thing! LOL!

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 4

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:04:53 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

i like being spanked however if you're going to spank/punish me to the point i need ER medical care, then it's abuse. it would only take one trip to the ER for me not to trust you as a my Dom again and i would part company immediately because i know it will happen again no matter if you promise that it won't. no submissive should be treated like a punching bag even if they enjoy being abused. that type of mentality is a neuro and psychological problem and the person should seek professional care.

my pov

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to bandit25)

Post #: 5

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:06:06 AM

julietsierra

Posts: 1841
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was adminsistered in a session even though it was within the submissive's consent and limits?

Wouldn't this be an abuse of trust and responsibility?

Should a dominant intentionally physically hurt, not emotionally hurt?

Is harm a perception or a reality and how is it defined?

Can giving a submissive discipline on a regular basis be percieved as harm as a co enabling of an adictive personality?

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

Are you medically trained? Are you a doctor, a nurse, an EMS worker?

If you're not, wouldn't NOT taking her be an abuse of trust and responsibility?

If the play you engaged in inadvertantly cut too deeply, broke something or worse is harm merely a perception or is this a singularly ridiculous question?

Is NOT playing with a submissive on a regular basis a form of abuse when you are aware that she derives so much from it?

And since when did all this become the characterization of an addictive personality?

And do you lay awake at night with these questions dancing in your head like vision of sugar plums on Christmas Eve?

juliet

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 6

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:07:32 AM

SirDiscipliner69

Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Why do you only ask questions?

Actually I do not ONLY ask questions. Questions are posted to evoke a thought process and a socratic debate.

I do respond and make statements of My perceptions.

Ross ©º°¨¨°º©

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 7

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:09:55 AM

julietsierra

Posts: 1841
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sambamanslilgirl

i like being spanked however if you're going to spank/punish me to the point i need ER medical care, then it's abuse. it would only take one trip to the ER for me not to trust you as a my Dom again and i would part company immediately because i know it will happen again no matter if you promise that it won't. no submissive should be treated like a punching bag even if they enjoy being abused. that type of mentality is a neuro and psychological problem and the person should seek professional care.

my pov

Oopsies happen. So do "Aww shits!" How the dominant in question approaches the "oopsies" and the "aww shits" speaks volumes of the dominant.

I wouldn't necessarily consider the oopsie or the aww shit to be a determiner of abuse - OR the characterization of someone who is a perpetual victim.

juliet

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 8

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:21:42 AM

ExSteelAgain

Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline

No, yes, no, yes, yes.

Hickory, dickory, dock, the mouse ran up the clock.

Rhymes are a way of overcoming the synapse gaps and keeping things understandable. Know what I mean?

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 9

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:23:58 AM

VeryMercurial

Posts: 620
Joined: 6/5/2006
Status: offline

Yes he would be in the wrong. I would hope he would step up and take care of all medical bills
and apologize profusely and begin to "play" a lot safer, or the next stop could be the county jail.

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 10

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:30:09 AM

SCDommie

Posts: 176
Joined: 1/24/2007
Status: offline

The police may not think so. Need a good lawyer when you go to the hospital. If the sub is a woman, I bet it will be reported as abuse to authorities.

SCD

(in reply to VeryMercurial)

Post #: 11

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:33:08 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

i agree occasional "oopsie" might happen but repeatedly? then we definitely have a problem. i would never accept an "oopsie" or "aww shit" if any Dom (Daddy included) starts turning the punishment/spanking into an abusive session which sends me to the hospital. more than likely the hospital, not me, would call the police to report my injuries as abuse.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to julietsierra)

Post #: 12

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:40:54 AM

Quivver

Posts: 1953
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

"oooopsie's and awe shit's" may happen, but who having the power to create them should be aware of the edge they walk on.
or in other words......... you oooops cause you F'ed up.

_____________________________

The problem with communication ... is the illusion that it has been accomplished. ~George Bernard Shaw

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 13

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:45:56 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

This argument (as opposed the one we should be having about why this guy always asks "aren't I super safe" questions) always seems to break into two camps.

Those who do a lot of real life play over years know that shit happens.

Those that do or risk little are always up in arms about risks they know little about.

(in reply to Quivver)

Post #: 14

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:46:11 AM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

LOL..I've actually had an oopsie or two, but, luckily, none that required medical care. If they had, you're damn straight, he better not just "send me to the hospital" but breaking some speed limits getting me there.

(in reply to Quivver)

Post #: 15

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:47:27 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69
Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was adminsistered in a session even though it was within the submissive's consent and limits?

Uh yes. Accidents happen in any context and if it's bad enough to need hospital care, then they should go.

quote:

Wouldn't this be an abuse of trust and responsibility?

I'm not sure how telling someone to go to the hospital when they are in need of hospital care is an abuse of trust and responsibility?

My nephew broke his wrist last week- does that mean his mother abused his trust and responsibility because of a simple accident? (actually we think she's continuing the tradition considering she broke her arm and her other son broke his wrist at about the same age)

quote:

Should a dominant intentionally physically hurt, not emotionally hurt?

A dom should hurt how he wants within the relationship as agreed upon.

quote:

Is harm a perception or a reality and how is it defined?

Harm tends to be a decision based on the harmed.

quote:

Can giving a submissive discipline on a regular basis be percieved as harm as a co enabling of an adictive personality?

You'll have to define what you mean by "give discipline" I don't give discipline to anyone, I help teach them discipline, and I will punish.

Anything CAN be perceived as harm and enabling addictive behavior.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 16

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:48:27 AM

CreativeDominant

Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was adminsistered in a session even though it was within the submissive's consent and limits?

Would he be in the right in what way? Because he was smart and/or caring enough to send the human toy he has broken to the hospital? Or right because...even though he broke her (which, from what I can tell from most threads, most dominants and submissives consider to be wrong)...he stayed within limits?

quote:

Wouldn't this be an abuse of trust and responsibility?

And just how exactly is insuring that a person that you have promised to take care of but instead have injured ... either deliberately or inadvertently... and who you are incapable of giving adequate medical care to, is cared for an abuse of the trust and responsibility to care for them?

quote:

Should a dominant intentionally physically hurt, not emotionally hurt?

Doesn't this question allow for misunderstanding given that the term "hurt" can range far and wide in its description of submissives in various physical states? Wouldn't a more accurate term for hurt which is bad enough for medical care to be sought be "injured" or "break"?

quote:

Is harm a perception or a reality and how is it defined?

I don't know...wouldn't that depend on whether or not you define things such as blood or broken bones or ongoing unconsciousness or indications of internal injures as illusions or as a reality?

quote:

Can giving a submissive discipline on a regular basis be percieved as harm as a co enabling of an adictive personality?

Wouldn't this question be too vague, given the infinite variety of people who call themselves submissives? Is it possible that there are people who are so into abuse that they mistakenly use submission as a way to get it? Isn't it possible that there are dominants out there who've discovered that classifying themselves as a sadist gives them the "right" to engage in abusive behavior and that their sadism is...at its core...fired by rage rather than the sexual and mental satisfaction that comes from infliction of pain?

Isn't it fun to always ask questions?

< Message edited by CreativeDominant -- 2/14/2007 7:49:35 AM >

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 17

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:50:33 AM

SirDiscipliner69

Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

Are you medically trained? Are you a doctor, a nurse, an EMS worker?

Why no I am not. I was not aware that I needed to be to spank a submissive. I would go for all of the above it someone would show Me how to fit that in My schedule. Or perhaps I might be like some and look it up in wickapedia the source of everything known to mankind by your kid down the block.

If you're not, wouldn't NOT taking her be an abuse of trust and responsibility?

I enjoy the taking of a submissive very erotic and especially if she has conseneted previously...usually rougher the better for Us both.

If the play you engaged in inadvertantly cut too deeply, broke something or worse is harm merely a perception or is this a singularly ridiculous question?

It is My perception that a dominant should be fully aware and ready to deal with all situations not just physically but emotionally and mentally as well. Harm is not just a phsical thing based on My percieved experience of over twenty years playing and sessioning.

Is NOT playing with a submissive on a regular basis a form of abuse when you are aware that she derives so much from it?

Not reading into your question I do not believe it is a form of abuse if a dominant chooses not tp play....it is the intent that would need to be presented here and the cause that brought the said actions to be rendered or not rendered depending on your clarification.

And since when did all this become the characterization of an addictive personality?

It can be aurgued by those in the mental and emotional field that BDSM is highly popular form of activity among those of an adictive personality.

And do you lay awake at night with these questions dancing in your head like vision of sugar plums on Christmas Eve?

Only if I can tie them up and whip them into submission making them do strange and unusal acts of perversion for My pleasure.

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

(in reply to julietsierra)

Post #: 18

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:51:48 AM

KeirasSecret

Posts: 415
Joined: 8/17/2006
From: central NH
Status: offline

quote:

Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was adminsistered in a session even though it was within the submissive's consent and limits?

I’m not sure I understand what you are asking here. I would think if a submissive needed medical attention after a session that the dominant would want to send/take them to the hospital. I would also hope, at least in my case, that if this was to happen it would be an accident, then again, depending on what the injury was from, or how often it happened, I would begin to wonder if my Dom knew what he was doing.

quote:

Wouldn't this be an abuse of trust and responsibility?

If my Dom was sending me to the hospital on a regular basis, I believe there would defiantly be a problem, since it is my understanding that he wants me to trust that he will not harm me. I believe this to mean physically and mentally.

As for the definition of the word harm, it is most likely one of those words that everyone defines according to their own ideas. Thankfully my thinking is fairly close to Sir’s, but now I’m going to have to ask just to be sure. This may not go over too well, as he already says I think too much, but I will keep the source to which my pondering is credited to a secret. I would not want him to ban me from reading your posts. ;)

quote:

Can giving a submissive discipline on a regular basis be percieved as harm as a co enabling of an adictive personality?

I’m not sure what you mean by this either. Are you referring to something similar to having a preconceive notion that I deserve to be punished, even when I have done nothing wrong?

I can say that when one situation always or often accompanies another, the first starts to be craved, when the second is present. Like the guy who trained his dogs to think of food, so that their mouths watered, when he rang a bell. Sir has done something similar with me. When I start thinking of a certain situation, I catch myself licking my lips for the other. This leads me to believe, that under the right circumstances, a person could be trained to crave discipline by administering it while doing something else they enjoy.

Although it would be interesting to read your point of view on the topics you bring up, I enjoy the thought provoking questions you often pose. Of course if I didn’t, I would probably move on without even reading it; like the advice I have seen given to many here, that state they don’t like something someone else has to say, suggests.

Be well,

_____________________________

It apears to me, the practice of "an eye for an eye" has finally taken it's toll; the majority are now walking around blind.

Bitching; whining in a louder voice.

If the truth hurts, change it!

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 19

RE: Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a sub... - 2/14/2007 7:52:07 AM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

I don't know about other "practices", but in rope bondage...oopsies happen...it's all part of what we agree to. I can't get too upset with an occasional oopsie or uh oh (although the uh ohs bother me a bit...lol). The only thing I would get upset with is if I'm telling my top or dominant that something is wrong...knot on a nerve or I can't feel my hands any longer...and he dismisses it. Course I guess that comes under the heading of not playing with someone who I don't know or who refuses to listen.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 20

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