RE: honesty about sexual orientation (Full Version)

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wyldsubmissive -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 2:15:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BRNaughtyAngel

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

It's the bondage and discipline, dominance and submission. I am willing to push soft limits, just not hard limits.


Do you understand what submission is?  I'm not talking about bottoming, but willingly and happily submitting your mind, body, heart and soul to your dominant? 

Two of your hard limits you list are face slapping and knife play.  So what would you do if your dom had you bound nude on your knees, legs open, hands behind your back.  He's been teasing and tormenting you for what seems like hours.  Sweet, soft caresses across your breasts bringing sighs of pleasure from your mouth, only to be interrupted by his pinching and twising your nipple until you want to scream from the pain.  Stinging blows from his cane followed by soft kisses and low whispers in your ear.

His hands moving over every inch of your body until he finds that tender spot between your legs.  His fingers slide between the lips, rubbing and stroking, then sliding inside and out again.  When you beg him for more, he responds by slapping that tender place with his riding crop.  The soft, sweet touches and the hard, stinging pain, all of it making you wet and throbbing, begging him to take you over the top. 

Over and over again, he brings you to the brink with his teasing, taunting and torturing.  You are physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted, but you want more. You want that release.  You beg him to give you that release.  You'll do anything, just please give you that release.....

He stands in front of you now and tells you to look up.  Through tear filled eyes you see he's holding a knife.  I'm going to cut you now defiant.  I'm going to mark you as mine.  Your heart is pounding louder and louder.  Your body is on fire and begging for release.  But you say start crying and saying No No No, I don't want that.  Please!  Then you feel the sting of his hand on your cheek and it brings you back, but oh god how it made you more wet. 

He runs the blade over your aching body.  Slowly up your arms, then across your tender, swollen breasts.  Up your thigh and down the other.  You're terrified, but your body is on fire and every inch of you is throbbing, just aching for him to take you and give you release.  The knife moves between your legs and the smooth, coolness across your throbbing clit is about to send you over the edge.  His other hand moves between your legs again, and he slides his fingers inside you.  You are panting and begging, humping against his hand.  His hard whisper in your ear that he's going to mark you as his now, but you can only cum if you tell him it's okay.  His fingers moving in and out of your wet, throbbing pussy.  His palm rubbing your swollen clit.  The knife poised and ready to mark you. 




RED!  STOP!!  PURPLE DINOSAURS!!!!  LordMasterDom, I know you read my profile about knives and face slapping being a hard limit and I  know you didn't just slap my face and run a knife over my wet throbbing pussy.  And don't EVEN get me started on you wanting to mark me as your own even though we've been in a loving, trusting, committed relationship for two years.  Untie me this instant!





The above story was intensely *ahem* stimulating.

Pertaining to this thread: everyone's allowed their opinions.

And one of my two favorite phrases:

Don't cry over spilt milk.

It spoils quickly.




sugarcandy -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 2:26:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

naughtangel, damn that was hot!


juliaoceania and wyld ----- you beat me to it! Was going to compliment the author, naughtyangel, as well [;)] nice n' naughty!

!!!! Just don't understand how anyone intelligent, sophisticated, adult equates bisexuality with a need to be unfaithful today.

Ignorant ----- no further comment. !!!!

!What about the guy who loves blondes AND brunettes? If he marries the blonde.... does that mean he MUST screw the brunette? Who cares if he thinks about it a little? Or if he dated brunettes in the past? !!!?!

SC




hisannabelle -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 3:27:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

quote:

ORIGINAL: hisannabelle

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

Whether he performs the act for his mistress or not, he is bisexual. For a straight sub, this would be a hard limit. I'm a switch so I sub sometimes. Because I'm straight, anything bisexual is a hard limit..


erm, that's by your definition. according to a lot of people, that's bullshit. that would be like saying allowing myself to be sexually used by a mistress automatically makes me bisexual, and were i straight (which i'm not) it wouldn't. it seems to me that you simply have a lot of deep-seated fears based on what you've been through, and while there's nothing wrong with that, i think it's kind of presumptuous for you to project those fears onto other people, especially when your definition of it is likely far different from most. (i'd be curious to see how many people on this board agree wholeheartedly with you.)

eta: what about slaves, or submissives whose limits are only defined by those of their owner? i don't really -have- hard limits - at least any that aren't His - i imagine that's true of many male submissives as well. where does the limit factor come into play there, by your definition?



I agree with defiantbadgirl.  Everyone is allowed to speak their own truth and readers are allowed to accept or deny it.


agree all you want. unfortunately that doesn't change the fact that she's pushing HER truth, which is at odds with any dictionary definition published in recent years, as well as most psychological studies of sexual orientation published in recent years, onto other people, and then wondering why she doesn't get the results she wants. there's nothing wrong with having your own definition of things, but don't bitch when you try to project it onto the general population and you don't get the results you're looking for. i have no problem with her speaking "her truth" on the forums, even her banging her head against the wall, i just find her bitching rather annoying, so i choose to point out why she's in the conundrum she's in.




missturbation -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 3:41:25 PM)

Whether he performs the act for his mistress or not, he is bisexual. For a straight sub, this would be a hard limit. I'm a switch so I sub sometimes. Because I'm straight, anything bisexual is a hard limit..

Ok lol, i slept with a woman for my Dom (well a previous one) and we also had a threesome. Yetttttt my profile says im straight and i would define myself as straight. I very much enjoyed my interaction sexually with a woman and would definately do it again for my Dom but no other reason. I am not bisexual.
 
Do you hate me yet defiantbadgirl?




AquaticSub -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 3:55:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

I understand that most of the people who have responded on this thread have a different definition of bisexuality than I do. But alot of the mainstream would agree with me. A straight person who never read the forums or was new to bdsm might not know the bdsm definition for bisexuality is different. 


And mainstream is exactly what we are about here.

Just had to say it.




defiantbadgirl -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 3:59:42 PM)

No, I don't hate you. I don't hate anyone for their sexual orientation.......straight, bi, or gay. I just think potential partners have a right to know if someone has engaged in bisexual acts before sleeping with them. You have a dom anyway. If for some reason you and your dom split and you are seeking, telling new potential doms that you're bisexual would actually benefit you. Most men are turned on by bisexual women.  Ask these same men if they like watching two males get it on and they're like no thanks. That's why I'm surprised TopCat was so mean. Straight male doms normally don't like to think about two men getting it on.




AquaticSub -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:01:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: topcat

I apoligise to anyone reading this thread for my venting- but after reading this far in this trainwreck of a thread, it just popped.
 
I apologise for my error in judgement in posting the above.


We're all thinking it to one degree or the other.




porthuronsub -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:03:37 PM)

Being with another man is a hard limit for me. 

There a sub has said it... too bad for you I am taken.  Sorry keep looking.

It actually grosses my Mistress out to see two men together.  Personal preference. 

But IMO unless a guy is attracted to other men, like actually check them out and WANT to be with them, just performing an act for their Mistress does NOT constitute bi-sexuality.  What does it mean if a Mistress wants them to perform on another Mistress, does that mean they are a womanizer? 

Sex is Sex, plain and simple.  you are reading way too much into it.




AquaticSub -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:03:42 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

No, I don't hate you. I don't hate anyone for their sexual orientation.......straight, bi, or gay. I just think potential partners have a right to know if someone has engaged in bisexual acts before sleeping with them. You have a dom anyway. If for some reason you and your dom split and you are seeking, telling new potential doms that you're bisexual would actually benefit you. Most men are turned on by bisexual women.  Ask these same men if they like watching two males get it on and they're like no thanks. That's why I'm surprised TopCat was so mean. Straight male doms normally don't like to think about two men getting it on.


*rolls eyes* Yes. Continue the stereotypes. Can we start talking about how straight women suck at sex now?




missturbation -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:10:07 PM)

telling new potential doms that you're bisexual would actually benefit you

I'm not bisexual though. I slept with a woman for my Dom and whilst i enjoyed it and would it again for a Dom it does not make me bi so i would feel no need to tell anyone i was bi because it would be a lie.




stef -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:10:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

*rolls eyes* Yes. Continue the stereotypes. Can we start talking about how straight women suck at sex now?

She might very well think that, especially when you consider that she turned her ex gay.

~stef




juliaoceania -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:11:48 PM)

quote:

That's why I'm surprised TopCat was so mean. Straight male doms normally don't like to think about two men getting it on.


Is this some sort of inference that a dom that does not get totally squicked and hateful about bisexuality in other men has to be bi himself? Oh come on.

Edited to rephrase this to be less snarky... often those who protest the deepest revulsion towards something secretly desire it and project those feelings on to others




AquaticSub -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:13:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: stef

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

*rolls eyes* Yes. Continue the stereotypes. Can we start talking about how straight women suck at sex now?

She might very well think that, especially when you consider that she turned her ex gay.

~stef


This is true. I mean, if she wants to play with stereotypes she doesn't understand we could have a lot of fun applying them to her.




heartfeltsub -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:15:41 PM)

(FR)

Is anyone else seeing a wall with a big red x on it and a sign saying beat head here?

*Editted to add this was directed at the OP and not julia.

heartfelt




porthuronsub -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:16:36 PM)

I've got another angle on this thread.  What about the gay guy that gets married to a woman because he lives in a narrow minded town and has to protect his career.  The entire time he is married he has sex with men outside of the marriage, it is a sexless marriage.  Is he gay or straight.  Must be straight because he is married to a woman,  at least by her definition.




AquaticSub -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:17:55 PM)

To everyone: Is anyone else amused by the fact that she claims to like psychology? Can we give her a copy of Kinsey or a book on modern sexual theory?

BadGirl, you do realize it's no longer considered a mental disorder right?  I mean, if you don't know that yet it could be part of the problem...




AquaticSub -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:20:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: porthuronsub

I've got another angle on this thread.  What about the gay guy that gets married to a woman because he lives in a narrow minded town and has to protect his career.  The entire time he is married he has sex with men outside of the marriage, it is a sexless marriage.  Is he gay or straight.  Must be straight because he is married to a woman,  at least by her definition.


Oooo that reminds me - what if I have sex with a man and realize I hate it but I keep having relationships with men because that's what everyone expects from me. At about 30 I realize that I'm really into only women. I guess then I couldn't be a lesbian, I have to be bisexual!




topcat -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:22:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl
That's why I'm surprised TopCat was so mean. Straight male doms normally don't like to think about two men getting it on.

Mean? Don't mistake my grandmotherly kindness for an attack. And don't be so quick to brand every straight male dom with your parochial homophobic worldveiw.




DiurnalVampire -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:24:27 PM)

I gave up pages ago. No one is going to convince anyone else of anything.  I find it rather saddening that such closedmindedness can be tossed around here.  The fact that how mainstream people take things has been repeatedly used as a reason that the BDSM community needs more honesty is equally annoying. Once the comment that teling a Master that you are bisexual could be a benefit came up... I just had to stop responding.
I find it as aweful for the women who lie and say they ARE bisexual as the men who lie and say they arent to fit in and be accepted. And it is threads like this that cause the men to lie.
You are creatig the same atmosphere of digust here that the D/s community faces in mainstream public all the time.  Lie about your sexuality if you dont want to be discriminated against. Just like having to hide your Dominant or submissive nature in vanilla life, your postng here that if guys are open to forced bi to make a mistress hapy, the should expect to be dicriminated against for ever after becasue they are now bisexual and therefore they will disgust most people who would have been interested otherwise.

Sorry, this is the last I will say on the subject.

DV




porthuronsub -> RE: honesty about sexual orientation (2/19/2007 4:25:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: porthuronsub

I've got another angle on this thread.  What about the gay guy that gets married to a woman because he lives in a narrow minded town and has to protect his career.  The entire time he is married he has sex with men outside of the marriage, it is a sexless marriage.  Is he gay or straight.  Must be straight because he is married to a woman,  at least by her definition.


Oooo that reminds me - what if I have sex with a man and realize I hate it but I keep having relationships with men because that's what everyone expects from me. At about 30 I realize that I'm really into only women. I guess then I couldn't be a lesbian, I have to be bisexual!


Amen!




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