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RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/23/2007 6:09:55 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

 can only speak for myself and the men I have known but within that circle, there are very few of us who would withhold sexual activity as a result of the wife not accomplishing one or two reasonable demands, let alone a bunch of unreasonable ones.  Not to hijack the thread but I would be willing to bet that if you were to set up a poll as to how many of the males on here ever withheld sex from their female partners during their "all vanilla - all the time" phase for not meeting a full list of reasonable demands, let alone unreasonable ones, you'd find very few males that did.

After all, tis all that men think about right? 


My best friend's husband will not put out. He would rather play video games, but we all have priorities

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to CreativeDominant)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/23/2007 9:18:16 PM   
BabyNyla


Posts: 578
Joined: 9/15/2006
Status: offline
I think with my hubby being 19 and constantly aroused ... if he turned down sex I would take his temperature and drive him to the hospital, lol


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(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/23/2007 9:52:17 PM   
taintedgypsy


Posts: 228
Joined: 2/10/2007
Status: offline 		falling over myself laughing ... thanks I needed that

warm smiles

(in reply to bastardandthewen)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/23/2007 10:02:14 PM   
taintedgypsy


Posts: 228
Joined: 2/10/2007
Status: offline 		Valid point Mustardseed,

I have found myself enjoying things that 12mths ago I would have called hard limits. Trust and security can lead you to places that you never thought possible, on the other hand hard limits that arise from past trauma or phobias can be different. "face slapping" is a biggy for me, I think it always will be, so much past caught up in that that I do not think I will ever be able to go there without complete freak out.

However hard limits should be respected untill discussion and time has them renegotiated.

Just my thoughts,

warm smiles to all

(in reply to Mustardseed)
Profile   Post #: 84
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/23/2007 10:13:18 PM   
taintedgypsy


Posts: 228
Joined: 2/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant

quote:

ORIGINAL: sublizzie

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrazyC

quote:

ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant


~shudders~...yanno, it is just a bit scarey though as to how many vanilla women use that paragraph...or something very akin to it.


hehehe yea i know, and i feel so bad for the husbands. Sex should never be used like that.


"Husbands?" What about men who use their wives like that? It's truly not a gender-specific thing.


I can only speak for myself and the men I have known but within that circle, there are very few of us who would withhold sexual activity as a result of the wife not accomplishing one or two reasonable demands, let alone a bunch of unreasonable ones.  Not to hijack the thread but I would be willing to bet that if you were to set up a poll as to how many of the males on here ever withheld sex from their female partners during their "all vanilla - all the time" phase for not meeting a full list of reasonable demands, let alone unreasonable ones, you'd find very few males that did.

After all, tis all that men think about right? 


Actually it is not that uncommon. I have a high sex drive and can go a little insane after longish periods without ... there have been men who relate these needs to power, with hold as punishment or as a bribe, see how long she will hang before giving in ... pushed to far and I can always find it elsewhere ... it is a fine line to walk.

It has happened often enough in my life that I tend to question any lack in a relationship and look for signs of these sort of games ... it is a pet hate of mine.

warm smiles

(in reply to CreativeDominant)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/23/2007 10:17:19 PM   
duckykarma


Posts: 95
Joined: 2/7/2007
Status: offline 		I have with held sex but thats only because i was having hormone issues

_____________________________

Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be, because sooner or later, if your posing, you will forget the pose, and then where are you?
-Fanny Brice

(in reply to taintedgypsy)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 2:05:59 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: taintedgypsy

Valid point Mustardseed,

I have found myself enjoying things that 12mths ago I would have called hard limits. Trust and security can lead you to places that you never thought possible, on the other hand hard limits that arise from past trauma or phobias can be different. "face slapping" is a biggy for me, I think it always will be, so much past caught up in that that I do not think I will ever be able to go there without complete freak out.

However hard limits should be respected untill discussion and time has them renegotiated.

Just my thoughts,

warm smiles to all


I generally view these sorts of things as boundaries she is setting for the protection of her personality.

While I can probably talk her out of them if I really wanted to, I tend to prefer having her whisper to me in a throaty voice that she wants me to push that limit.

Im a patient person, even if it is all about me.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to taintedgypsy)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 4:28:51 PM   
swtrayn


Posts: 222
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania




I am not submissive to anyone until I choose to be, and once I choose to be I am completely submissive to that person. It takes a lot to gain my submission, and anyone can call themselves a dom.

So I suppose I would probably have fallen into the "demanding" category. I demanded men that were suitable to me in order to continue dialogue beyond "No thank you", and they were nothing but strangers to me until I met them, and I was not going to defer my submission to strangers. It does not matter a sub's situation, we all deserve exactly what we will put up with.. and there is no shame in being disabled.


Wanted to comment on this because I totally agree with you. Just because a person is submissive doesn't mean they are submissive to just anyone. And I guess if that is "demanding" then alot of submissives are.

just my two cents.


rayn

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 4:34:01 PM   
duckykarma


Posts: 95
Joined: 2/7/2007
Status: offline 		swtrayn i totally agree with you..just because someone is submissive dosent mean they are submissive to everyone. I would think that Doms would appreciate an upfront sub because it saves a lot of time in the long run. If a Dom enjoys something and the person they are looking at has it as a hard limit well then its better to find out before even exhanging email's with them, at least in my opinion..I would NEVER be with someone who demaned blow jobs everyday..if that makes me demanding then so be it..

_____________________________

Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be, because sooner or later, if your posing, you will forget the pose, and then where are you?
-Fanny Brice

(in reply to swtrayn)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 4:45:52 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		what's wrong with blow jobs:D

(in reply to duckykarma)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 4:56:35 PM   
subrob1967


Posts: 4591
Joined: 9/13/2004
Status: offline 		Is there some kind of secret society rule that states a submissive can't hold out for a Dominant who meet their criteria that I'm not aware of?

Why shouldn't a sub ask for what they want in a relationship? Dom(me)'s do.

(in reply to scottjk)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 10:06:58 PM   
TheGaggingWh0re


Posts: 222
Joined: 1/19/2006
Status: offline 		I definitely agree that it's one thing to have deals and limits (such as age range, kinks, etc.) and another to have silly requests, like, as one mentioned, a certain haircut.

However, one has to remember that subs who get too specific and unrelenting will have less success, so one does not need to worry about them.

Also, I think it is healthy for any submissive and dominant to have requirements. It's not to say that they shouldn't consider expanding their horizons here and there, but to enter a relationship and feel no attraction to the other person is just asking for trouble and possibly heartbreak down the road. So, in a way, I'm thankful that some of these people are a little picky! It saves many a lot of drama that could happen.

(in reply to scottjk)
Profile   Post #: 92
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 10:41:41 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheGaggingWh0re

I definitely agree that it's one thing to have deals and limits (such as age range, kinks, etc.) and another to have silly requests, like, as one mentioned, a certain haircut.



[joke]

On your knees, bitch, and beg for your Achy Breaky Hair.

[/joke]

Mullet-obsessed Sinergy 

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to TheGaggingWh0re)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 10:45:12 PM   
duckykarma


Posts: 95
Joined: 2/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

what's wrong with blow jobs:D


For most there arnt anything wrong with blow jobs but for me they are a hard limit because i have been forced to do them to too many ppl including my dear ol dad....


_____________________________

Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be, because sooner or later, if your posing, you will forget the pose, and then where are you?
-Fanny Brice

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 10:47:59 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sinergy

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheGaggingWh0re

I definitely agree that it's one thing to have deals and limits (such as age range, kinks, etc.) and another to have silly requests, like, as one mentioned, a certain haircut.



[joke]

On your knees, bitch, and beg for your Achy Breaky Hair.

[/joke]

Mullet-obsessed Sinergy 


Contemplating turning ass length hair into a mullet

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 10:49:53 PM   
duckykarma


Posts: 95
Joined: 2/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sinergy

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheGaggingWh0re

I definitely agree that it's one thing to have deals and limits (such as age range, kinks, etc.) and another to have silly requests, like, as one mentioned, a certain haircut.



[joke]

On your knees, bitch, and beg for your Achy Breaky Hair.

[/joke]

Mullet-obsessed Sinergy 


Contemplating turning ass length hair into a mullet

LMAO 


_____________________________

Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be, because sooner or later, if your posing, you will forget the pose, and then where are you?
-Fanny Brice

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 10:49:59 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sinergy

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheGaggingWh0re

I definitely agree that it's one thing to have deals and limits (such as age range, kinks, etc.) and another to have silly requests, like, as one mentioned, a certain haircut.



[joke]

On your knees, bitch, and beg for your Achy Breaky Hair.

[/joke]

Mullet-obsessed Sinergy 


Contemplating turning ass length hair into a mullet


You think we will work out if you demand hair that says you have personality...

...even if it is really, really bad?

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 10:51:11 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

You think we will work out if you demand hair that says you have personality...

...even if it is really, really bad?

Sinergy


No, I thought perhaps you would want to humiliate me by giving me an ape drape


< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 2/24/2007 10:53:01 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 11:16:30 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

You think we will work out if you demand hair that says you have personality...

...even if it is really, really bad?

Sinergy


No, I thought perhaps you would want to humiliate me by giving me an ape drape



Long as I leave enough on your Norco Neckwarmer to tie to a doorknob, we probably have a deal.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: Demanding Subs!!! - 2/24/2007 11:49:05 PM   
azzmaster


Posts: 864
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline 		oy vey!

(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 100
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