Mustardseed
Posts: 291
Joined: 5/27/2006 From: Seattle, WA Status: offline
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Since azzmaster keeps claiming that few people if anyone are actually answering his question, I'm going to give this a go based on my own past of being a fat woman with what many would consider a peculiar-looking face. There seem to be some basic, unspoken rules among those looking for either an easy lay or a My First Practice Submissive: - "I like fat chicks. They'll do anything." is a quote attitributed to Gene Simmons of KISS. There's a belief that the less like a model someone looks, the more desperate they are for attention. The more desperate someone is, the less resistence they'll put up regarding things that they might otherwise not want to do. In an effort to discourage pointless chat on ICQ years ago, I put up a very strict policy of opening chat gambits (I detest online chat with people I don't already know and like in real life) -- one should read my profile and have something, if not several somethings, to talk about that were directly inspired by my profile. One guy replied in a nasty tone, saying that I'd better be really fucking beautiful to justify that attitude. Apparently ownership of my time was directly tied to what my face looked like, not how I wished to spend my online life.
- At a flirting workshop during convention I attended, one of the pieces of advice offered was, "Go ugly early. Everyone knows that people eat away most of the evening chasing after the sexiest people, and that the ones chosen at the end of the night are everyone's last picks. There are people who won't sleep with you if they know that -- it's too insulting. If you go with your last pick earlier, you won't get the pick of the evening but at least you'll get laid." Someone who is upfront about boundaries and restrictions regarding play with the new and desperate is probably putting off the people who'd either use them as a last ditch effort or as the Ugly Gone After Early.
- People who are living in Dirtview ("We Don't Have Any Dirt, But We Can See It From Here!") may well be getting hit up by people who don't way to pay a professional for cyber or phone sex; or by poorly socialized folks who can't find a date where they are, but figure the allure of a larger city might be enough to bring the desperate to their door. Being very upfront about any and all boundaries can give pause to the online predators.
I'm not saying that these people are lying about what they don't want, but I'm also suggesting that they probably have enough self-love and esteem to not leave themselves open to any random person who feels like jerking them around. Someone who spends more time looking at what these people like to do, what their profiles and possibly posts here say are probably going to get much farther with them than people who cruise their photos and their Not Even On Your Birthday lists. "And who do they think that they are?" Um, humans worthy of protection and care, no matter how old, what shape or how they're formed?
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