LadyHugs
Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Dear mixielicous, Ladies and Gentlemen;
In my mind's eyes I see, grace and elegance comes from within 'first.'
It comes with the 'spirit of intent' and how you project yourself within as to make it beam outward.
Service that comes from the heart will be much smoother and graceful. Practice makes the protocols easier to carry, as its no longer a thought out order but a 'known' series of steps to get to that goal.
Another area where grace and elegance comes from, is from patience and the 'do not rush' mental strength. When a person hurries, then elegance and grace is gone.
Posture is very important, as it also balances the body as well as the additional load, such as a service tray, etc. Most servants find that the movement from the hip leading will be much smoother than leading from the leg.
In my salad days, I wore a 'hobble' which restricted the legs, as far as distance in stride goes. Some of the gowns I wore acted like a hobble. Some gowns were more yielding.
I am also a fan of using one's favorite and inspiring individual--What the qualities they possess and what identifies as the epitome of what grace, elegance and style would be. Perhaps the late,HRH Princes Diana. Perhaps HRH Queen Elizabeth II, her mother perhaps--Queen Mum and or her sister HRH Princess Margaret. Perhaps looking past and look at the Ladies in Waiting to HRH Queen Elizabeth II or the servants, such as the footman, the housekeeper, the butler and so forth.
Another thing I do find important, is getting comfortable in a formal serving uniform before one serves at a formal event. It goes with real practice. But, so often everything goes perfectly in an everyday frock and then once in a more formal uniform, everything gets disrupted. The uniform must become one's second skin per se. So, like I wore gowns that were no longer fit for public consumption or to be seen public and practiced. If its comfortable and not a distraction the entire person will come through as elegant and graceful. This is the same with a servant. Gloves are often something that throws off the smooth performance in service. It really is due to not wearing them regularly enough as to be a comfortable addition.
If there are no long halls and long mirrors about, there is nothing to exclude the use of the store front windows that often act as mirrors. Don't we all look at ourselves as we walk? Some stores have mirrors on their building support columns, to which you can walk to them and practice. Security cameras, one may watch themselves as they pass.
Perhaps a chum can video you. Adding soft swaying music can help keep a graceful pace.
As for the serving aspects, it is amazing how a little bit of extra effort can create an elegant touch. Small tray, add a lacy pad under the goblet, add a sprig of greens and then take the beverage to the victim..err target of the service. Shows the extra effort beyond just bringing a goblet in the fingers. A tray is attractive and adds class.
I do recommend Emily Post's book on etiquette and manners, as far as entertaining goes. The era of the 1950-1970 was the year of entertainment and service. International Guild of Professional Butlers also has a huge volume of 'service' in the capacity of a butler.
Just some thoughts.
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs
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RE: elegance in serving - 
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wholesome lovely caretaking rituals are not "privilaged" or "princessy" if a slave is pleasing her master with her silky grace!!!! Thanks for sharing!
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