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ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

I am curious to hear what "undomly" orders other have given or have been given.  I want to make a point, or at least think I can, that not all orders come out of the "uberdominant" coloring book. 

If my life is busy, I don't want to take my time to plan a pleasant evening with you.  I give you a couple of times I am free and I want you to pick one and set it up.  Sure it is hotter if I plan the whole thing out, pick what you are to wear (oh hell I can still do that, wear the red blouse) or what we are going to do.   I will enjoy your company which is my goal and just don't have time to deal with the minutia, make yourself useful to ME, which is your role.

Submissives get it in their head that only micromanagement is "real" dominance.  I hope to god LA doesn't do her drive by linking and actually posts something about her "reactive" style as I think that is along the lines of what I am talking about.

So tops and bottoms, doms and subs, and god knows what others, post away about your undomly orders!

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ORIGINAL: Sadista

So somewhere in america there is a sub who is carrying My vagina with him.

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ORIGINAL: Sadista
Then I blurted "Don't move. Pull it out. Pull it out. Pull it OUT!"  and he does in one quite move. So somewhere in america there is a sub who is carrying My vagina with him.

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ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

LOL MFM- this was very surprising to me as it happened at EVERY southern household I've been to.  They would specifically tell me "OK this first time I'm doing it for you, but after that you fend for yourself" and acted as if this was the height of polite hostessing!

Everywhere I've been in the North, the host was expected to provide and deal with those things directly every single time and it would take quite awhile for someone to become socially close enough to start rummaging in another kitchen and "help themselves."

Culture clash there.

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Submissives get it in their head that only micromanagement is "real" dominance.

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ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

I'll start by saying that 'most' of the orders in this house don't come from an uber dominant coloring book. Most are very benign couched as a polite request.

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ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

LOL MFM- this was very surprising to me as it happened at EVERY southern household I've been to.  They would specifically tell me "OK this first time I'm doing it for you, but after that you fend for yourself" and acted as if this was the height of polite hostessing!

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I ate a lot more cheese, wondered if he thought I was a pig or if he was concerned that I was eating all his cheese, told him I really liked cheese, got up, put the cheese away, cleaned up the dishes and then went and sat back down and came to the conclusion that I was neurotic.

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ORIGINAL: BeingChewsie

I would be so afraid that my choice would be wrong, not pleasing, not perfect..ugh. That is why I searched for a dominant partner who was very unlikely to use me in this way.  I'm a do abc type not a plan abc type. It has nothing do with it being "hotter", it has to do with the types of things I'm capable of doing. My owner knows the worry over pleasing him would leave me unable to decide where to go or what to do. I would be lost in the maze of what would make him happier in any given moment. ... I would feel terrible the whole night ...

I would think submissive people who don't want to be used that way( because it is anxiety and stress producing) would know it too.

Is your point know what type of dominance you need? I think that is a valid point and people would be much happeier if they did got to know themselves better ahead of time.

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Lots of interesting stuff but the above is why I write this both for those who struggle with it and those who have found a nice that works for them.

As sometimes happens someone posts something that challenges me and forces me to think and even perhaps rethink my position.  Chewsies may be one of those and for that I thank her.

SO, this is the issue I was trying to get at, that there are submissives who misread anything but a knucle dragging order as "whimpy" or "undomly"  and a related one about those who berate themsevles internally over the question of whether they did it "well enough".

Perhaps the "well enough" part is fodder for another thread but I wanted to highlight these two to show why I started this thread.  The two are intertwined because if I order someone to pick a movie, some would simply pick a movie but others would be offput thinking I am not being domly because I didn't also state which movie and or paralyized wondering which movie would be "perfect".

First off, I ORDERED them to pick a movie, I am pretty sure if I only wanted to see one, I could order that too.  Secondly, I just want to sit in a dark theatere and watch a movie and hopefully I know enough about my girl to know our tastes align I will enjoy anything she would.

(in reply to BeingChewsie)