Padriag
Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: FukinTroll
I look at the hit count and looked at how the posters followed the links, respected the boundaries, and made their curious posts as well as the contrary. For those of you posted on those threads do you feel that you respected boundaries or simply reacted?
Of course it wasn't respected. Such boundaries apparently never are here on these forums, something I've found rather amusing. We have forums for "masters", "mistresses", "sub/slaves", "goreans", etc. but on a daily basis anyone posts anywhere about anything regardless. The structure and apparent intent is never enforced and so far as I know never has been. So we have these separations in theory, but in practice it all might as well be lumped into a single forum. Personally, I generally only post to the Ask a Master or the General forums, unless I'm asking a question for the others. That's just me personally respecting the apparent intent of the forums. But I'm unusual in that regard, most feel no reservation about posting anywhere and to any thread where they feel like speaking their mind. I don't see that situation changing without an enforcement of a set of rules, and I don't see that happening either. So in practice the Gorean forum isn't really that, just the illusion of it, and at times probably serves more to make Goreans a target for venting than giving them their own space. Not what was intended... but you know what they say about best laid plans.
quote:
Now ask yourself if it is so hard to bridge the gap from here to there? Is it so hard to ask for more clarification on a point we don’t understand as opposed to tearing down a post and reacting to what we believe we are hearing?
Depends on who you are asking. Among individuals you'll find the full range of responses. Between groups as a whole... apparently that is still a generally uphill battle.
quote:
Can we open the door both ways and accept each other to each side?
With some individuals it already is, with others it will remain shut. The problem here is that there are those on both sides of this "wall" that want it there and work to keep it in place. There are those who despise Goreans for various reasons and aren't going to stop persecuting them. There are Goreans who take an elitist attitude and prefer their isolation from those "heathen BDSMers" whom they enjoy looking down upon.
But there are also individuals for whom there is no wall and friendships form regardless. I'm not myself Gorean and personally have no use for it. The irony is that I am here at CM discussing this with you because a Gorean friend invited me here. He thought I'd enjoy these forums, and for the most part he was right. Funny how life works out sometimes.
quote:
Can we regard a Gorean post off the Gorean boards as another practitioner giving their 2 cents?
We can when that person posts as an individual and not as a Gorean, when they speak from experience and reason rather than espousing some idea because "the books said so." Likewise I'd like to see Goreans more accepting of an idea coming from a non-Gorean when that person is speaking from experience and/or reason.... but not if they're making some claims about "well that's how the Old Guard did it." My point here is, a good idea is a good idea regardless of its origin and we should all listen whether its a Gorean, a BDSMer, or some other random person presenting it. If someone shows me a better way to tie a knot, I'm really not going to care if that person is a BDSMer, a Gorean, a boy scout or a sailor... I'll take the information for being the useful factoid that it is. However, one place the problems start is when anyone tries to tell another they should do things a certain way or live a certain way just because. Show me a better knot and I'll listen, but what I have no patience for is anyone trying to tell me to live differently just because they choose a different path.
quote:
Being a community of broad acceptance… are we?
Its my considered opinion the "community" has never been one of broad acceptance. Quite the contrary, they're very exclusive... after all, there's all those nasty "vanillas" to guard against.
Sadly, I think there will always be some separation and I also think we live in a time more prone to it. Among any group you find a range of people with differing goals and beliefs. There are Goreans who are shining examples of integrity, tolerance and openness to others... and there are Goreans who are smug, extreme, intolerant elitist who shut out anything or anyone that doesn't agree with their narrowmindedness. You find the exact same range of behavior among BDSMers and any other group. None of these groups is monolithic, which makes them rather hard to treat as a group in the first place. It would be different if Goreans or BDSMers or whomever were more like, say, the Free Masons who have a defined code of behavior that must be adhered to or you get kicked out of the club. Then you could treat the group as a true group. But that isn't the case... anyone can call themselves a Gorean, or a BDSMer, or a Master, a Mistress, a submissive, a slave, a switch, poly, Daddy, babygirl/boy, etc. and there's nothing to stop them. There are no enforceable standards. Its why I don't personally identify with any group. That we might wish for or believe various groups or titles ought to have standards associated with them I don't doubt, count me as among those who wishes we did. But the reality is we don't. The lesson here is that the next time any of us runs into someone proclaiming themselves as anything, before we assume they represent that group, we ought to consider that this is more likely an individual and should be judged solely for who they alone are. In that we can build bridges with individuals... which is always easier than building bridges between communities.
And yeah, I miss having IB around here too.
_____________________________
Padriag
A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer
|
RE: “Bridging respect” - 
Profile
New Messages
No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages
Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages
Locked w/o New Messages
Post New Thread