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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 10:18:49 AM

spankmepink11

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quote:

ORIGINAL: jauntyone

Greetings

for myself, this issue of little to no importance to me. Master decides when, how often, how long, etc

I wish you well

melissa

May i ask if your own orgasms were a priority before you became involved in your current dynamic?

* Edited to include all others who have answered in the above manner as well.

< Message edited by spankmepink11 -- 4/7/2007 10:21:20 AM >

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 10:20:50 AM

Lucius

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A Dominant and submissive relationship is not defined by who has orgasms or doesn't, or how many or how often.

What counts is control. It doesn't matter if the slave is waiting months between orgasms or is experiencing them daily - or for that matter, if the Master has few, many, or none. What makes the relationship what it is, is that it is the Master Who decides If, When, Where, and How Many. For both.

I have found that slaves often crave the Blessing (when the Master Spends, or spills Seed) more than the yielding (the slave's own climax.)

Lucius Alexander

House of the Palindromedary

(in reply to arayofsunshine55)

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 10:27:57 AM

spankmepink11

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucius

A Dominant and submissive relationship is not defined by who has orgasms or doesn't, or how many or how often.

What counts is control. It doesn't matter if the slave is waiting months between orgasms or is experiencing them daily - or for that matter, if the Master has few, many, or none. What makes the relationship what it is, is that it is the Master Who decides If, When, Where, and How Many. For both.

I have found that slaves often crave the Blessing (when the Master Spends, or spills Seed) more than the yielding (the slave's own climax.)

Lucius Alexander

House of the Palindromedary

Thank you for your input Lucius, however the question was not whether we define our relationships by number or frequency of orgasms...but what priority they hold in each individual dynamic..

(in reply to Lucius)

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 10:32:42 AM

PoeticMotion

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Personally, I love making my sub orgasm as many times as possible. I have a very hard time orgasming when wearing protection, so right now the only time I really orgasm is oral. She gets upset at how hard it is for me to orgasm even thugh it is no reflection on her, which inspires her to greater efforts :)

Since we only get to see each other once a week or so right now until this semester is over (she's got a very hard courseload and lives 40 minutes away from me), I haven't denied her orgasm in my presence yet; i enjoy it too much to watch her react. I have taken away her right to masturbate to orgasm several times between dates when she's been bad,though, and she hates that. Complies, but it's an effective tool of discipline.

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 11:07:24 AM

Slavetrainer2007

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Orgasm control and a subs orgasms is a priority for me. Like many doms that have posted here, i am thrilled to be able to take her to that level over and over again. In fact i usually become so wrapped up in a subs orgasms and the control of them, i end up wearing her completely out before i ever get around to my own.

Theirs nothing better then ending a session and a subs so weak and shaken from orgasms she can barely stand:)

As for my own orgasms they are a low priority, i know ill get mine if and when i want it. I get as much enjoyment out of playing with the sub as i do an orgasm and it last longer

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 11:10:51 AM

DiurnalVampire

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quote:

ORIGINAL: spankmepink11

How do you feel about your submissive partners's orgasms.
Is it a priority? A non issue?

Completely a nonissue since he is not allowed to do so. Once every now and agan, I might treat him to one, but for the most part Angel is not permitted to orgasm, I bring him close often but never over that edge.
As for mine, he does not even try. It is not an aspect of our interaction.

DV

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 11:15:38 AM

FreshBread

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I provide her orgasms at my discretion........she cums like a rock star.....which turns me on......

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 11:15:58 AM

ExSteelAgain

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Raising my hand for orgasms. Yeah, kind of like Michael said, I want to make sure I can make her cum damn good. If I make her cum when I want it shows we are compatible for one thing. It enhances my own orgasm when I’ve worked her well and had her cumming. It seems many women who get into BDSM will find that they orgasm like crazy for the first time in their lives. Submissives, know what I mean?

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 11:18:40 AM

MasterGremlin

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Master usually has me so aroused that I pretty much can't think about anything and in that lovely stuper I just do whatever I am told. I think for Him, controling His subs orgasms is the priority, afterall, they are really His anyway.

Cordially,
minxy

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 11:25:13 AM

crouchingtigress

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*grins at the compliment*

I have read a lot about this pink, and talked to lots of friends as well....a number of women myself included get really grouchy after day five of denial, and left for a couple weeks the body shuts off the need entirely....creating a sort of permeable sullenness coupled with edginess. What slave trainer is doing would never work for me and i cant help thinking that he might want to rethink it.

With men it seems they just get sweeter and more obediant....at least in my experiance...i have never forced a sub for longer than a month though, so, on super-long denial i can not comment, because to force him for longer then a month denies me too.

As some one said with men, they get a little grouchy, no wait that is not the word, cocky yes that is it, after being allowed to come, and honestly they become less obedient, less pliant. So that is why i dont prioritize their orgasm because i know my need for their body parts that bring me pleasure, supersedes my desire to deny them for any substantial period of time.

< Message edited by crouchingtigress -- 4/7/2007 11:27:55 AM >

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 11:40:38 AM

Hotch

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Is orgasm a priority? Is food or sleep a priority? Any Dominant worth their leather knickers knows the value of sexual response (notice I don't limit this to orgasm). Just like any other bodily need, controlling it can alter the state of the mind. Anyone who does not know the value of sexual response, doesn't possess the tool set needed control another human being. We're talking basic control here, I find the question kind of elementary.

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 12:29:57 PM

ownedgirlie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

stivie,

quote:

since when is the quality of a Master on wether his peformance he is able too make a sub cum?

You are missing the point. Until you know how good it can be...you won't know what you are missing. Its like you fear the pain of a particular implement only because you know how much it will hurt.

quote:

maybe their are those subs out there measure Master on that 1 min sexual experience orgasm *shugs*.

Perhaps this is your problem...one minute?

I would echo all of this. My Master's control of my orgasms is one of his greatest amusements. I've never felt such power rip through me in my life. The "...you know how much it will hurt." comment hit home. These orgasms aren't even always pleasureable for me physically because of how intense they are. Sometimes they are downright overwhelming. They take everything out of me (sometimes literally) and leave me exhausted into the next day.

As for one minute. Well I wouldn't care much about them either if they were only a minute. See above.

As for orgasm denial...well, I just think of him and I'm craving him. Sometimes he likes to tease me for days or weeks on end, keeping me teetering on that edge. ASlavesLife put it well - it's incredibly difficult holding that edge several times a day, several days in a row. But it's as wonderful as it is difficult. The most I've done that is 2-3 weeks I think. 77 days is amazing.

My orgasms are for Master's pleasure, though. He owns them, he toys with them, he decides when they will happen and when they will not. What my body and mind go through when I am having them is all about him, not me. And the places I reach both inside and outside myself have brought me to some amazing self discovery.

I think of these orgasms as communing with him. He orchestrates my body and mind and I go where he leads....but there is an intense connection between us during these times. And for as much as they take out of me, that connection keeps me craving them time and time again.

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 12:51:34 PM

BoundDragon

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Ooo I like this subject. I am one of those fortunate girls that can cum so easily.... this is also a problem however. I have had to try and stay discreet when he is biting and kissing my neck (he has found it can drive me wild and make me cum).

There are times when he makes a point of counting how many orgasms he can get out of me and how many ways he can do it. We have also worked out I have more than one type of orgasm depend on what he is doing to me.
He has told me many a time how much he loves to hear those little noises I make before and during an orgasm. I think I can quite safely say that orgasms may not be important but if they are there they sure are a whole lot of fun.

I enjoy turning my attention to him also... I can be a bit of a bitch and keep him on the edge until he really cant take it anymore or I try to make him cum quick... hard and fast.
I cannot begin to explain how extatic I feel to know I can make him feel that good... usually making him cum has the same effect on me.
So I then get the added bonus of a simultanious orgasm.... these are just awesome.

< Message edited by BoundDragon -- 4/7/2007 12:52:10 PM >

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 2:15:43 PM

tricia

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I prefer my pleasure to be incidental to my Masters. I have no restrictions when it comes to orgasms. Orgasm denial isn't part of our relationship as I'm aroused just basking in his presence. (My goodness, that sure did sound like some flowery bullshit. ) When I was seeking a Master - I tended to stay away from any dominant whose profile bragged or stated how many orgasms he could give me. That's just a big turn off for me, personally.

I don't crave orgasms but think having them on a semi regular basis is healthy (and good for the skin.) I have no problem having them all by myself.

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 2:53:02 PM

jauntyone

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quote:

May i ask if your own orgasms were a priority before you became involved in your current dynamic?

Greetings

Before I met Master, there had been no one else. I was pretty sheltered growing up and paid no attention to such things So, I guess you could say that no, they were not.

I wish you well

melissa

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 3:13:40 PM

glycerine

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Sir decides when He is going to orgasm and when i am going to orgasm. i am very fortunate that He likes to make me orgasm as much as possible. Orgasm denial is not part of our dynamic and He frequently encourages me to seek my own release when He is unable to be there to do so. Especially when i am under periods of stress. i find that orgasms are incredible stress relievers for me and while i wouldn't consider orgasms a priority in my life with Sir, they definitely are in my everyday life.

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 5:14:52 PM

Aubre

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I guess for me it is less about orgasm denial and more about her having orgasms on my terms. I like for her to have plenty of orgasms but I want it to be clear that they are a result of what I'm doing.

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 6:01:00 PM

puella

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Although I think it is different for every person, for me, the ability to orgasm is very much tied into my emotional state. I was always a very sexual person but about three months into moving in with my former owner, I stopped being able to cum, even when I was trying to do it myself. I think that that problem became worse and worse as I came to understand how little it mattered if I came at all... which meant something important to me. It's been about 2 years now and it still doesn't work... so I don't know, maybe you can break somethings permanently.

Again, I think it is very different for everyone, but sometime I think if the submissive is emotionally tied into her sexuality, what the person she surrenders to thinks of her sexuality might well manifest itself in her response.

< Message edited by puella -- 4/7/2007 6:03:02 PM >

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 6:15:16 PM

SimplyMichael

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Lucius,

It isn't often I read a post I wish I had written, but yours certain is one.

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RE: Submissive's orgasms....priority? - 4/7/2007 6:27:18 PM

tricia

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quote:

May i ask if your own orgasms were a priority before you became involved in your current dynamic?

No, they were not. But I did find with most of the sexual partners i had - many were not confident enough to ever make it all about them. My orgasms were more important to them than they were to me. Yes, that's it, they forced me to have them :)

< Message edited by tricia -- 4/7/2007 6:28:01 PM >

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