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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 4:56:42 PM   
velvetears


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

Arrogance?  If she went to the police and reported this guy- they'd tell her..
"Look, you were drunk.  How do you know you didn't consent?  Rape cases don't even go forward in 'his word versus her word' cases when there's no evidence- you want me to jail this guy based on the fact that, when drunk, you don't explicity remember providing consent after you took him back from the bar?  You don't even know who he is, his name, or even what he looked like!  There's nothing we can do for you."
 
I can't believe you said I was at the "height of ARROGANCE!!" for pointing out the guy wouldn't go to jail.  Jeeze.

Velvetears wrote in a previous post:
You don't know what you are talking about.  Having sex with someone who is impaired is against the law for your information because the impaired person is not able to give consent.  The police would be very interested in collecting evidence (semen) and pressing charges to put the scum bag away.  Where do you get these things from?? 

Curious Lord Wrote:
In a court of law, there's two sides to a story.  The state must make its case against a defendant.  You're innocent until proven guilty.

Now, in a case of "he raped me!", with no other evidence- as most men have the common sense to wear condoms with girls they pick up from the bar- what's the jury going to decide?  He's not proven guilty.  For all they know, this guy called her fat, they got into a big argument, and she's just making it up to get back at him.

Now, add in she was drunk and can't remember whether or not she provided consent?  Even she's not sure he raped her!  Maybe she consented, but just forgot due to alcohol!  I mean, jeeze, the girl can't even, in good conscience, claim he raped her.

And, where do I get these things from?  My father was an attorney.  As is my uncle.  I know the law and my way in and out of court.  But, hell, this is common knowledge.  How did you not know it?

Edit:  I'm not responding to the second one.  It was just name calling and such.  Let's try to act like adults.

Velvetears wrote:
You haven't heard a thing i am saying. The parts i bolded in your post above are  what i want to point out. i will reiterate one more time - If a man has sex with a woman who is impaired, whether she verbally consents or not - it  is in fact RAPE.  She cannot give consent becasue she is impaired - a cop would not even ask her if she gave consent if he knows she was drunk when they guy had sex with her. 

Look at the law:

RAPE
LAWS RELATING TO RAPE
According to the Penal Code Section 376, a man is said to have committed rape if he has sexual intercourse with a woman under any of the following conditions or circumstances:



Against her will. Although the woman is capable of giving her consent, she willfully and consciously rejects sexual intercourse with a man, but is forced into it.

Without her consent. Sexual intercourse may take place without the woman's consent because she is incapable of giving her consent, For example, she may have been drugged and as such may have been unconscious at the time of the incident. This can also apply to a person who is incapable of giving a conscious consent to the act due to mental deficiency or insanity.

With her consent, but the consent was obtained as a result of putting fear in the woman of hurt or death to herself or any other person, or when the consent obtained under a misconception of fact and the man knows or has reason to believe that the consent was given in consequent of such a misconception. For example, when a bomoh or a sinseh promises to cure a girl of some form of ailment provided she has sex with him, even though he knows that the sexual act does in no way contribute towards the healing. It also applies to a bogus physician who rapes a patient while pretending to give medical treatment.

With her consent, but the man knows that he is not her husband, and her consent is given because she believes that he is another man to whom she is or believes herself to be lawfully married or to whom she would consent With her consent but when at the time of consent, she is unable to understand the nature and consequence of that to which she gives consent. This could be if she is drunk or is high on drugs.

With or without her consent, when she is under sixteen years of age. This is because children and teenagers below this age are deemed by the nature of this immature judgement, legally unable to give consent.


The Penal Code also states that penetration is sufficient to constitute the sexual intercourse necessary to the offence of rape. By penetration it is meant even partial penetration or the slightest degree of entrance of the penis into the labia or vulva or pendendrum with or without the emission of semen.

[Edited for clarity as the quotes got all messed up]

< Message edited by velvetears -- 5/4/2007 5:00:43 PM >


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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:02:14 PM   
CuriousLord


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Being drunk doesn't mean she can't consent.  A lot of people forget what they did the day after a drunken night.  How does she know she didn't provide consent while conscious?

Also, even if she did, she can't prove he raped her.. it's not going to get him in jail..

I realize you think it's a bad thing, and it may outrage you, but that doesn't change the fact he's going to get off scott-free.

You're not even getting my point here..

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:05:28 PM   
velvetears


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

Being drunk doesn't mean she can't consent.  A lot of people forget what they did the day after a drunken night.  How does she know she didn't provide consent while conscious?

Also, even if she did, she can't prove he raped her.. it's not going to get him in jail..

I realize you think it's a bad thing, and it may outrage you, but that doesn't change the fact he's going to get off scott-free.

You're not even getting my point here..


Look CL this isn't "my opinion" or "my point"  this is what the law says!  Girl drunk + sex with guy = RAPE. Why - because a girl cannot consent to sex when impaired.

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:06:04 PM   
CuriousLord


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So if they're both drunk, and have sex, it's the guy raping the girl?

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:15:31 PM   
losttreasure


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velvetears, citing Malaysian law isn't really helping your argument.  You also need to realize that laws vary from jurisdiction to jurisdiction.

CuriousLord, your point is very subtle indeed.  However, velvetears does have a point that it in some criminal codes, the situation you've described is indeed a prosecutable offense.  I do agree is it much more difficult to bring charges, prosecute, and successfully convict someone under those cirumstances. 


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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:21:25 PM   
velvetears


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Rape
The crime of rape (or "first-degree sexual assault" in some states) generally refers to non-consensual sexual intercourse that is committed by physical force, threat of injury, or other duress. A lack of consent can include the victim's inability to say "no" to intercourse, due to the effects of drugs or alcohol. Rape can occur when the offender and victim have a pre-existing relationship (sometimes called "date rape"), or even when the offender is the victim's spouse.
Under a variation known as "statutory rape," some states make it unlawful for an adult to engage in sexual intercourse with a person who has not reached the age of consent (usually 18 years of age).

American Law

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:22:18 PM   
CuriousLord


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Yeah.. at this point, I've sort of given up on her getting the bigger picture.. so some of my points are simply devil's advocate.

My main point to her is that a guy can take a girl back from a bar and rape her in the interest of having sex.  The rest of this junk got started when she said that no guy would do that for risk of being punished.

Ah wells.  Always did think devil's advocate was a fun game.  I'm just afraid she's forgotten what we're debating in the first place.

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:28:07 PM   
CuriousLord


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quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

Rape
The crime of rape (or "first-degree sexual assault" in some states) generally refers to non-consensual sexual intercourse that is committed by physical force, threat of injury, or other duress. A lack of consent can include the victim's inability to say "no" to intercourse, due to the effects of drugs or alcohol. Rape can occur when the offender and victim have a pre-existing relationship (sometimes called "date rape"), or even when the offender is the victim's spouse.
Under a variation known as "statutory rape," some states make it unlawful for an adult to engage in sexual intercourse with a person who has not reached the age of consent (usually 18 years of age).

American Law


Erm.. how does any of this have to do with the guy in the story not raping her out of having sex with her?

To recap.. I was saying rape isn't always about domination.. and provided the story about the drunk couple going back to her house after the bar.. she passes out, he has sex with her unconscious body..

My point in this story was that he raped her, yet it was just about sex. he didn't care about dominating her.  Or he could've, if it was into that.  But, primarily, it was just about putting his cock into a pussy and humping.

You said no guy would ever do that for sexual reasons since he'd get caught- something I disagreed with, as people do rape at the risk of getting caught and because he wouldn't be.
You said he would.

I said he wouldn't, because it's a he said vs. she said story, and they were both drunk.. it's not going to hold enough water for the DA to even consider prosecuting it.

Now you have been, apparently, trying to prove what he did is illegal- which is never a point of debate.  I said he wouldn't get jailed since it wouldn't hold water in court, not that it wasn't illegal.

I hope this helps you get back on track.

Edit:  Added in some spacing to make it an easier read.

< Message edited by CuriousLord -- 5/4/2007 5:29:17 PM >

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:31:12 PM   
darkinshadows


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Velvet - even if you never made the claim, your assertion does.  Please do not start a tit for tat battle as I am not trying to 'win' anything unlike yourself - simply point out that what you are saying simply states that sexual rape does not exist and so, therefore by default, anyone raped by sexual motivation doesn't suffer rape - it's a simple equation.
 
I didn't name names on who is name calling or stooping to low digs and patronizing behaviour.  So please to not be as crass as to make it look like I am pointing the finger at anyone in particular, you are doing that job quite well by yourself.
 
And as for name calling -
You are a 46 year old woman, acting like a toddler with name calling, rants and the inability to accept that you may be wrong in making such a sweeping generalisation that for every single fucking rape in the world that one - not ONE may be sexually motivated.  Are you god?  A goddess?(opps - sorry - thats my title)  Know all - understand everyone minds and motivations?  I very much doubt it.  You make claims on writing a thesis - yet when was this?  How many years?  Apparently CL and Naked were in diapers, so thats pretty long ago I would say - in comparrison to more recent studies.  I would rather go with what is relevant TODAY.
 
Sadism is not just about the pain.  It is about the motivation behind it - ie SEXUAL RELEASE because one causes pain/humiliation etc to another.  Sadism isn't just a label, it is a medical and pschological condition and FETISH that ends in sexual stimulation and release.  If you are not sexually stimulated by anothers pain, then that isn't sadism - no matter what anyone wants to claim.  Really - go see the definitions and try not make up your own.  The motivation is SEXUAL.  If it wasn't - then it wouldn't be sadism. Motivation is having the desire and willingness to do something.  Ie SEXUAL RELEASE is the GOAL - pain/humiliation etc is the ingredients.One is motivated to cum or be sexually aroused, so therefore if pain of another does that for you, you are motivated to achieve the end result to cause pain in another to get there.  Domination/humiliator/paingiver is the personality.  And emotion is the payback, if you like.
Cripes how hard is it to get?
 
Anyone got a brick wall?
 
 
Peace.
 


< Message edited by darkinshadows -- 5/4/2007 5:32:49 PM >


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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:31:22 PM   
MadRabbit


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

Yeah.. at this point, I've sort of given up on her getting the bigger picture.. so some of my points are simply devil's advocate.

My main point to her is that a guy can take a girl back from a bar and rape her in the interest of having sex.  The rest of this junk got started when she said that no guy would do that for risk of being punished.

Ah wells.  Always did think devil's advocate was a fun game.  I'm just afraid she's forgotten what we're debating in the first place.


Well...personally...she lost about 5 pages ago.

Thanks for the enjoyable read though CuriousLord.

It was very stimulating on an intellectual level

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:32:46 PM   
velvetears


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Wikepedia :

The lack of valid consent does not necessarily mean that the victim explicitly refused to give consent. Generally, consent is considered invalid if it is obtained from someone who is:
  • Under any kind of duress (force, violence, blackmail, etc.)
  • Judgementally impaired or incapacitated by alcohol or drugs (legal or otherwise)
  • Mentally impaired whether by illness or developmental disability
  • Below the age of consent defined in that jurisdiction


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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:36:32 PM   
darkinshadows


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And with that, I am off for a fabulous weekend...
 
CL - you may need this...      have a wonderful may bank holiday...
 
Peace and Rapture All


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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:43:42 PM   
velvetears


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i don't appreciate your condescending tone so this will be my last post in reference to anything you have to say.  Believe what you want and make any assumptions you like about my own beliefs - research does support my views - and i never spoke in absolutes ie : never ever or always etc...

CL made aquisations about a girl not being able to bring any substantial charges of rape in a "drunk-rape episode - i believe he said no cop would even bother with such accusations, then backpeddled when he realized he was wrong. He makes asumptions about this kind of rape saying - He was just interested in getting some pussy and humping - i don't think its that black and white or that simple. To see it as such in my opinion is missing the subtleties of motivation and drive when it comes to this criminal act, which is considered rape. 

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:48:09 PM   
farglebargle


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What we need is a culture where Women and Girls both have access to handguns, and are trained to use them to shoot rapists dead.

Let them make their case for "He Needed Killing", and everyone gets on with their lives... Excepting the dead rapist.



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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:52:17 PM   
MadRabbit


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quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

i never spoke in absolutes ie : never ever or always etc...



Your entire argument began with an absolute

quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears
Rape is about violence and control, not sex


I mean seriously...

I want to   just reading this

 

< Message edited by MadRabbit -- 5/4/2007 6:00:33 PM >


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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:55:24 PM   
cjenny


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This thread makes me feel like I've been working out  

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 5:58:38 PM   
velvetears


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

i never spoke in absolutes ie : never ever or always etc...



Your entire argument began with an absolute

quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears
Rape is about violence and control, not sex


I mean seriously...

I want to   just reading this

 


Well Rabbit to me absolutes are when someone uses terms like "never" always" - if i had said "Rape is always about violence and control, never about sex" then i would agree with you in that i used absolutes - but i didn't - others read that into what i was saying.

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 6:02:50 PM   
CuriousLord


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quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears
Well Rabbit to me absolutes are when someone uses terms like "never" always" - if i had said "Rape is always about violence and control, never about sex" then i would agree with you in that i used absolutes - but i didn't - others read that into what i was saying.


My orginial point- which you argued with me on- is that it wasn't an absolute.

quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

Rape is about violence and control, not sex


Not to pick on you, I just hate this line.  It's so cliche and it's not accurate!

Rape can be about violence and control and not sex.
Rape can be about sex.
It can swing either way.  Or both.  It's freaking rape.


In disagreeing with this, you constrained your argument to being an absolute.
You've been arguing against this ever since.

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 6:04:33 PM   
MadRabbit


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Hmmm....

Well....you kind of did say that....

Because an absolute is when something is absolutely one thing and absolutely not another thing.

Hence black and white.

Your statement was "Rape is about violence and control, not sex."

This is drastically different then saying....hmm...."Rape is mostly about violence and control and less about sex."

Because....when you say "Rape IS about violence and control. NOT sex."

Your saying rape is about one thing and not about the other...

which...is... um....saying....

Forget it.

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RE: Is it rape if she likes it? - 5/4/2007 6:10:03 PM   
CuriousLord


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

Well...personally...she lost about 5 pages ago.

Thanks for the enjoyable read though CuriousLord.

It was very stimulating on an intellectual level


I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Heh, it can be a bit like banging your head against the wall when you're actually in it, huh?

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