RE: Masterhood

RE: Masterhood (Full Version)

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CuriousLord -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 6:51:53 PM)
Anything that makes you happy, hun.

dcnovice -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 7:35:23 PM)
quote: Oh to be a child again and return to the days of perfect certainty. Ah, yes. The older I get, the less I'm sure I know.

dcnovice -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 7:50:22 PM)
quote: Have you ever met one of those people in special classs at school in your youth? Not really able to get things, they're typically proud of their ability to add single-digit numbers, still spelling four-letter words in middle-school, getting down how to use quotes in highschool? The difference between their IQ and a normal person's IQ is a little less than half the difference between mine and a normal person's, or about the same as mine and a gifted person's. Huh?

jaunty1 -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 8:01:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OnlyHis quote: She has only one sibling she's fond of, a younger brother I allow her to visit. Well ... I was interested in reading more of what your dynamic is and even understood it till this. You allow her to see her brother? I am glad Master is not the kind that would try to keep me from my family. I wish you well and your slave lots of luck There have been times that I have refused to let melissa see her family. I see nothing wrong with this thinking here; if it is something that both have agreed to abide by. Live well Alex

MagiksSlave -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 8:06:53 PM)
Why would you refuse to let her see her family?? Was there a reason or did you do it just cause you could?? Magik's slave

jaunty1 -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 8:12:48 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave Why would you refuse to let her see her family?? Was there a reason or did you do it just cause you could?? Magik's slave The reason does not matter; at the time it was decided that she would not see her family. She accepted it without question. That was the end of it. Live well Alex

dcnovice -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 8:18:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jaunty1 quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave Why would you refuse to let her see her family?? Was there a reason or did you do it just cause you could?? Magik's slave The reason does not matter; at the time it was decided that she would not see her family. She accepted it without question. That was the end of it. Live well Alex I understand that, but as a novice I'm still puzzled. Did you not think it was good for her to see her family or just not want her to? One reason I'm curious is that cutting someone off from family and friends can also, I've read, be a tactic for an abuser, so I'm wondering what its appeal is to other folks.

MagiksSlave -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 8:23:01 PM)
I guess I just cant emagine saying to Master Im gunna go to the mall with my sisters who Im very close with and haveing Master telling me for no reason that I just cant see my sisters, Now if we had earlier plans then that makes sence or if there was really a good reason, like he told me not to go to work with my aunt (they own their own busness) it was an order because I have finals Im stressing and very very stressed and not doing so great because of the stress I didnt want to go could really afford it but knowing me if they came to get me in the mornign I would have gotten up and gone so he made it an order not to go with my family that makes sence to me... I dont know I just dont get it Magik's slave

jaunty1 -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 8:26:42 PM)
quote: I understand that, but as a novice I'm still puzzled. Did you not think it was good for her to see her family or just not want her to? One reason I'm curious is that cutting someone off from family and friends can also, I've read, be a tactic for an abuser, so I'm wondering what its appeal is to other folks. melissa and one of her sisters do not get along at all. The last time they were in the same room, broken bones had to be mended, literally. At Christmas, I made the decision that she was not going to see her family this past year. I called her father, explained why; he understood. Melissa was upset for a bit, but she got over it. And no, I did not give her the reason why; I had no reason or desire to. I simply told her that she was not going home for Christmas. quote: I guess I just cant emagine saying to Master Im gunna go to the mall with my sisters who Im very close with and haveing Master telling me for no reason that I just cant see my sisters, Now if we had earlier plans then that makes sence or if there was really a good reason, like he told me not to go to work with my aunt (they own their own busness) it was an order because I have finals Im stressing and very very stressed and not doing so great because of the stress I didnt want to go could really afford it but knowing me if they came to get me in the mornign I would have gotten up and gone so he made it an order not to go with my family that makes sence to me... I dont know I just dont get it There is really nothing to understand in this instance. It's a simple case of her trusting that I would have a very good reason for doing what I do; and not questioning it. I am under no obligation what so ever to provide her with an explanation Live well Alex

MagiksSlave -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 8:30:49 PM)
Honestly that makes more sence to me... though.. I dont think I would get along with someone very well who didnt want to explain things to me Id get frustrated.. I trust Master very much but I just sometimes need to know, I seek to learn how his mind works and reasons behind things.. the "becuase I said so" sends me to a bad frustrated place heh my parents never evnen use that on me because well it didnt work with me!! Magik's slave

dcnovice -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 8:32:44 PM)
Thanks for explaining, Alex. I appreciate the education!

WhiplashSmile -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 10:32:23 PM)
quote: I understand that, but as a novice I'm still puzzled. Did you not think it was good for her to see her family or just not want her to? One reason I'm curious is that cutting someone off from family and friends can also, I've read, be a tactic for an abuser, so I'm wondering what its appeal is to other folks. This is a tactic used by abusers where they shut somebody off from family and friends. The thing is that an abuser will accuse the family and friends of causing problems and trying to come in between the abuser and the victim. It can become confusing to the victim. The difficult part is to be discerning about WTF is really going on. There are some cases where it's best for a slave to cut ties with some friends. Examples would be friends that tend to drag the sub/slave down a bad path such a friends with major drug addiction problems and whatnot. Friendships that actually are not healthy ones to have. Same thing can be applied to family members. In some cases family members and friends can be abusive and not healthy for the slave. There is a difference between abusive control vs. healthy control. The bitch of a time is that abusers like to try to paint a picture that what they are doing is healthy control when it's really not.

KurtKaboom -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 10:37:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: dcnovice quote: Have you ever met one of those people in special classs at school in your youth? Not really able to get things, they're typically proud of their ability to add single-digit numbers, still spelling four-letter words in middle-school, getting down how to use quotes in highschool? The difference between their IQ and a normal person's IQ is a little less than half the difference between mine and a normal person's, or about the same as mine and a gifted person's. Huh? I think it means he's right up there with Ted Kazynski.

WhiplashSmile -> RE: Masterhood (5/8/2007 10:44:56 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KurtKaboom I think it means he's right up there with Ted Kazynski. The 160-170 IQ range, where too much of a good thing can turn out to be really bad thing.

MadRabbit -> RE: Masterhood (5/9/2007 5:07:32 AM)
Well easy buddy...your getting a little too emotional now and its best you step away. quote: ORIGINAL: CuriousLord I did not say you had no experience, Rabbit. I'm not as foolhardy as you in making such an accusation. I did imply, though, that those in their 40's in the lifestyle for more you are more experienced sources, and that you have contradicted them in sentiment. Foolhardy? Perhaps to someone who is annoyed that I dont beleive his own bullshit. My knowledge comes from many people who have been doing this a lot longer than me and how I have contradicted them goes over my head. I could list a lot of how you have contradicted yourself, but I dont have that much time. Further more, I am not the one here arguieing with these people. Now that you have made a long list of impassioned romantic convictions and questions, allow me to respond them from a position back here on Planet Earth. quote: I would ask, in your questions, why, if your slave has annoying little habits, have you not corrected them? As much as I would like to pretend I am God and can recreate my slave in my own image, I dont. Creating new behaviors and habits is much more plausible than changing old ones. Sure, there is behaviors I strive to correct, but from a realistic perspective, I pick and choose my battles. I beleive there is a fine line between molding someone into what I want them to be and accepting them for who they are to maintain their sense of self. If I was still a chef, I could strive to correct every single little bad behavior that my cooks have. But, if I did and they had to listen to me nagging them everyday over every little thing, they would quit! I find the fine line between the two. Not putting knifes back in the knife drawer...can let it go...Leaving the meat out of the frig all night....we need to talk. The same goes for a slave. If I strived to correct every little habit that could possibly annoy me, no time would be left over for having fun or enjoying ourselves. Further more, I was talking more about "MY" annoying little habits. Its amazing how I hear stories of where a slave's annoyance of her masters shit stains in her underwear has slowly brewed and brewed because she wasnt allowed to talk about it and then one day blows up and throws all the laundry at him. I wonder how many relationships have ended because a slave entered a relationship and found out three months later that her Master constantly picked his nose at the dinner table and she couldnt get past that little pet peeve of hers. quote: How is it you are uncertain as to her limits? Is it that you don't have enough experience, or simply don't want to confront the answer honesty, hoping time will make it more desirable? How is it you are so certain of her limits lol? Human beings are constantly growing, changing and discovering. New limits are torn down and brought forth all the time. Something you said you would do you might now be able to do when finnally confronted with it. Something you said you wouldnt do might not be so bad one year from now. If I want a relationship to survive, my dominance, rules and ways have to change and mold as well. Its just...reality. This is the line between a wise leader and a stubborn brat who just wants everything his way all the time. quote: Why have you not confronted the hard questions and gauged where it stood? Stared into her eyes and asked her the hard questions in the most sober of times? How many times have you taken her out to that beautiful grassy field just outside that everyone neglects on a cool, overcast day with a gentle breeze, stared up at the passing cloud formations, and talked about life for hours? How many times have you engaged her in debate, questioning her fiercily? How many sleeepless nights debating beliefs, convictions, philosophies, feelings? Translation of your Romantic Preaching : Have you had discussions about difficult things? Many times lol. All relationships do. Doesnt make you anything special. quote: How many times have you taken her into a class or work, just to have her there to see what you do, despite her getting in the way of everything? You brought her to your work....and she annoyed you....and you gasp suffered threw it?! You are a true romantic, a martyr, a saint. This is purely a testament to the strength and depth of your relationship! quote: How many empty days have you sent her off, to be alone yourself, to question yourself, searching fiercily for your own truth? You mean how many times have I asked for some personal time to contemplate things? Plenty of times. Its a normal thing in relationships. All people do it. Not anything special or make you any better or stronger in your own convictions. quote: I wonder, how many times is it that you have traveled a hard route, alone and against social forces, to make something you believe in happen? Well...you got me here, but not all of us are out to "change the world" and not all of us are less of people because we arent. I was once, but I mellowed out a lot as I grew up. quote: How many times have you stopped to consider just how fucking stupid you are and let go of your notions of what is? Typical geeky rebel stuff. Not all of us live life at war with the world. quote: When have you let go of your comforts? The superstitious beliefs that give us hope in exchange for agreeing to forego the truth? Seeing as how I was raised Catholic and am now just a free thinker, I would say many times. I dont knock people constantly for their "surperstitous beliefs" or am so arrogant to claim I know the truth behind them. quote: How many times have you looked at your love and known that you weren't living your truth with her? Quite a few and then I did the hard part...I ended it with her because she wasnt my ideal partner. Everything goes threw this. Everyone has been there. Doesnt make you anything special. quote: I know of world-weariness.. the hardships that come as the emotion of love diminishes and the commitment becomes prodominant. I know of the hardships and trials by which you come to understand yourself and your mate more over the years. And I know of all the honest questions you should've asked yourself before all of it, that the world forced you to stop denying. LOL...if these questions are the best you can throw at me, then you have no clue what world weariness and hardships are! These are all normal things that happen in any relationship or threw the course of one's life. They add no more strength to your hollow words and ideals. This is the equivalent to me going "I am amazing and superior to all because I've kept a job for a year!" and then everyone else looking at me funny and going "Yeah...well...we all have jobs."

MadRabbit -> RE: Masterhood (5/9/2007 5:23:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: dcnovice quote: ORIGINAL: jaunty1 quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave Why would you refuse to let her see her family?? Was there a reason or did you do it just cause you could?? Magik's slave The reason does not matter; at the time it was decided that she would not see her family. She accepted it without question. That was the end of it. Live well Alex I understand that, but as a novice I'm still puzzled. Did you not think it was good for her to see her family or just not want her to? One reason I'm curious is that cutting someone off from family and friends can also, I've read, be a tactic for an abuser, so I'm wondering what its appeal is to other folks. Its not so much "cutting off" In any relationship, there will be a time when spending time with me and spending time with her family will conflict. Then there has to be a choice has to who gets preference. Sure, I would like my slave to come with me to the movies to see Spiderman 6, but I dont beleive that has preference to her going to visist her dieing brother on her death bed. I have to put what is best for her over what I want. However, if she wants to go drop a quick visit to mom when I need her help around the house...well she might have to put that off for awhile until her chores are done. Thats just my two cents on the whole "family thing"

CuriousLord -> RE: Masterhood (5/9/2007 10:43:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile quote: ORIGINAL: KurtKaboom I think it means he's right up there with Ted Kazynski. The 160-170 IQ range, where too much of a good thing can turn out to be really bad thing. Really... reallllyy... lonely. I'd go all teen-emo-angsty on you, but I'm getting over it. That's really the most sucky part of it, though.

CuriousLord -> RE: Masterhood (5/9/2007 12:02:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit Well easy buddy...your getting a little too emotional now and its best you step away. My emotional scheme is.. odd. Hence, I don't show my emotions here, outside of those occasions when my curiousity slips through and shows. I mirror the perception I have of others' tone and use it in response. I would encourage you to examine your own tone if you find something overly emotional. Still, I find you interesting, so there's no need to discontinue. A moderator has, however, messaged me and asked me to keep things more decent (well, specifically, to avoid name calling), so I'm afraid I can't exactly reproduce the tone of the following post. And, yes, I'm aware I'm arrogant. I ask you accept this as a character flaw. quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: ORIGINAL: CuriousLord I did not say you had no experience, Rabbit. I'm not as foolhardy as you in making such an accusation. I did imply, though, that those in their 40's in the lifestyle for more you are more experienced sources, and that you have contradicted them in sentiment. Foolhardy? Perhaps to someone who is annoyed that I dont beleive his own bullshit. My knowledge comes from many people who have been doing this a lot longer than me and how I have contradicted them goes over my head. I could list a lot of how you have contradicted yourself, but I dont have that much time. Further more, I am not the one here arguieing with these people. I do believe my point at the time was that people with the most experience have commented in support of either this dynamic or its validity, despite not being part of it. This was contest to your statement that I was speaking agaisnt this with more experience. You later responded to this with saying I underestimated your own experience, though acknowledging others still likely had more experience than yourself. I do not recognize one making an argument to accuracy on a subject based merely off experience, but it was easier to point out how that was not the case than make such an argument. I hope this sums up this part of conversation for you. quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit Now that you have made a long list of impassioned romantic convictions and questions, allow me to respond them from a position back here on Planet Earth. Actually, those were satirical.. reflecting upon your own "long list of impassioned romantic convictions".. you're kind of murdering your own point in doing this. Still, I guess it's a little late for that. =/ Let's use this as an excerise, as I think it's a good one. We can keep our respective view points, as you perceived them at the time of writing this most recent reply of yours. quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: I would ask, in your questions, why, if your slave has annoying little habits, have you not corrected them? As much as I would like to pretend I am God and can recreate my slave in my own image, I dont. Creating new behaviors and habits is much more plausible than changing old ones. Sure, there is behaviors I strive to correct, but from a realistic perspective, I pick and choose my battles. (Cut for space conservation, but this goes on to say what you mean by choosing your own battles and cites a kitchen example.) So you're saying that you do not have an absolute power over your slave, or a level at which you could correct her annoying habits, and that having such would be as to be God? You also feel correcting things would be a "battle"? quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit Further more, I was talking more about "MY" annoying little habits. Its amazing how I hear stories of where a slave's annoyance of her masters shit stains in her underwear has slowly brewed and brewed because she wasnt allowed to talk about it and then one day blows up and throws all the laundry at him. How is an order of not being allowed to talk related to correcting her mannerisms? Also, I believe you're interrupted my post as, 'I talk to my slave for hours a day', which would seem to invalidate this point. quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit I wonder how many relationships have ended because a slave entered a relationship and found out three months later that her Master constantly picked his nose at the dinner table and she couldnt get past that little pet peeve of hers. And this, my friend, is the value of communication within a relationship. quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: How is it you are uncertain as to her limits? Is it that you don't have enough experience, or simply don't want to confront the answer honesty, hoping time will make it more desirable? How is it you are so certain of her limits lol? Human beings are constantly growing, changing and discovering. New limits are torn down and brought forth all the time. Something you said you would do you might now be able to do when finnally confronted with it. Something you said you wouldnt do might not be so bad one year from now. If I want a relationship to survive, my dominance, rules and ways have to change and mold as well. Its just...reality. To the first part, you talk to her and get to know her. The growing can be growing to new limits; I believe most would say a Master isn't performing well if his slave grows to be less obidient and comes to obey from a smaller set of orders. quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit This is the line between a wise leader and a stubborn brat who just wants everything his way all the time. I'd disagree. Being more Dominant than you wouldn't make one a stubborn brat, Rabbit. Now, whining when a slave fails to perform due to inability- such as whining about a cake not being made well enough, despite the slave's intentions- that would be bratty. This is among the reasons I feel taking responsibility for a slave's actions is a mature and noble thing to do. quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: Why have you not confronted the hard questions and gauged where it stood? Stared into her eyes and asked her the hard questions in the most sober of times? How many times have you taken her out to that beautiful grassy field just outside that everyone neglects on a cool, overcast day with a gentle breeze, stared up at the passing cloud formations, and talked about life for hours? How many times have you engaged her in debate, questioning her fiercily? How many sleeepless nights debating beliefs, convictions, philosophies, feelings? Translation of your Romantic Preaching : Have you had discussions about difficult things? Many times lol. All relationships do. Doesnt make you anything special. Again, I was making a satire of the romantic "life" preaching you were giving me. I believe you can take the above response and apply it to yourself. Still, in the spirit of the excerise.. Have you really done this? So many hours of communication each week? How do you not feel you know her and her limits? quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: How many times have you taken her into a class or work, just to have her there to see what you do, despite her getting in the way of everything? You brought her to your work....and she annoyed you....and you gasp suffered threw it?! You are a true romantic, a martyr, a saint. This is purely a testament to the strength and depth of your relationship! You would get annoyed for a slave being in the way when you put her there? I would enjoy her presense and accept she's in the way because of my own orders. Again, I feel it's important to take responsibility for one's actions. quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: How many empty days have you sent her off, to be alone yourself, to question yourself, searching fiercily for your own truth? You mean how many times have I asked for some personal time to contemplate things? Plenty of times. Its a normal thing in relationships. All people do it. Not anything special or make you any better or stronger in your own convictions. Understanding the truth more thoroughly doesn't strengthen your convictions? I would argue this means: 1) Your convictions are at maximum strength. 2) Your convictions are not supported by a more thorough understanding of truth. Further, I would argue that (1) isn't a realistically human aspect, making (2) the reason for this. quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: I wonder, how many times is it that you have traveled a hard route, alone and against social forces, to make something you believe in happen? Well...you got me here, but not all of us are out to "change the world" and not all of us are less of people because we arent. I was once, but I mellowed out a lot as I grew up. Actually, this does strikes as a little sad, but somehow comforting. Since there's an agreement on the point, no counterpoint is provided. (Though you may argue it being either "a little sad" or "somehow comforting" at your disgression.) quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: How many times have you stopped to consider just how fucking stupid you are and let go of your notions of what is? Typical geeky rebel stuff. Not all of us live life at war with the world. Ack! This is a red alarm! All of us are very stupid, my friend! We do silly things for reasons we don't get. We hardly understand the world around us! Hell, if you were much smarter, you could probably make yourself clinically immortal within the decade! (No, this is not to say I'm nearly that smart. I'm also very fucking stupid.) This is important to realize, even if you see it as "geeky". If you deny this point, you also deny that there are many things out there, above and beyond us. Amazing things that, though we will not know, could have been, and still might be. I certainly hope you do not disregard this! quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: When have you let go of your comforts? The superstitious beliefs that give us hope in exchange for agreeing to forego the truth? Seeing as how I was raised Catholic and am now just a free thinker, I would say many times. I dont knock people constantly for their "surperstitous beliefs" or am so arrogant to claim I know the truth behind them. After making such a transition, you still find it hard to see how superstitious beliefs are fundamentally different from logically concluded ideas..? Further, you would claim applying logic in contradiction to superstition is arrogant? quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: How many times have you looked at your love and known that you weren't living your truth with her? Quite a few and then I did the hard part...I ended it with her because she wasnt my ideal partner. Everything goes threw this. Everyone has been there. Doesnt make you anything special. Again, this is sort of the sentiment I was trying to express to you.. the "Everyone goes (through) this. Everyone has been there. (Doesn't) make you anything special." Not that I actually believe "everyone" has- that's a silly assmuption. But, many, yes. quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit quote: I know of world-weariness.. the hardships that come as the emotion of love diminishes and the commitment becomes prodominant. I know of the hardships and trials by which you come to understand yourself and your mate more over the years. And I know of all the honest questions you should've asked yourself before all of it, that the world forced you to stop denying. LOL...if these questions are the best you can throw at me, then you have no clue what world weariness and hardships are! These are all normal things that happen in any relationship or threw the course of one's life. They add no more strength to your hollow words and ideals. Again, satire, though I guess saying it once is enough.. it just seems like you're not getting it since you typed this before directly said it. Um.. yes, though.. world weariness is such a complex subject.. getting tired of being around eachother and going through struggles.. yes, Rabbit, this is all beyond me, as I've never felt it before.. Forgive me, I'm sort of taken back that you think world weariness is something that people can't understand.. ..are you really silly enough to believe this..? quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit This is the equivalent to me going "I am amazing and superior to all because I've kept a job for a year!" and then everyone else looking at me funny and going "Yeah...well...we all have jobs." Again, this is the sentiment I was getting across to you.. You've been trying to say "I'm superior in my knowledge of M/s- your system won't work- because I've kept the job for a couple of years!". And then I'm just looking at you funny and going, "Yeah.. well.. we all have jobs.." This is one of those times I'm kicking myself for thinking something I was saying would be more obvious than it seems to have been.

MadRabbit -> RE: Masterhood (5/9/2007 1:16:03 PM)
Welll...since we have fully moved into the realm of actually making realistic points to just twisting words around with pseudo talk, the last words can be yours if you want..

CuriousLord -> RE: Masterhood (5/9/2007 1:19:05 PM)
If you don't want to discuss anymore, that's fine. The point of discussion's to, well, communicate. "Last words" are more of an argumentative sort of thing. I don't dislike you nor am I mad at you, Rabbit. And I still think your name and the story behind it's pretty neat. Take care.

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