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What standards do we want or is it no standards at all. - 5/12/2007 1:22:29 AM   
Totalmaster4you


Posts: 1359
Joined: 6/19/2006
Status: offline 		Greeting to all the Masters, Dominants, Dommes and Tops. I've been reading on this site as well as others and in my humble opinion I've been aware of a growing level of bitchiness from those that self identify as slaves and submissives. We all participate for different reasons, me to add facts if they are lacking and positive outcomes.
Diversity of ideas is not welcomed, rampant bitchiness, a lack of discussion is this the standard that we want as our means of exchanging information and maybe making new friends. So what do we say?

_____________________________

Sometime ago I decided it was time to change my nic. However I didn't wish to disconnect from my original profile. Since then I've signed Touch your mind (TYM or Tym). Opinions in my posts should be taken as my opinion and my opinion only.
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 3:04:57 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		So. if I am reading this correctly, your 'complaint' is that you don't like the way you are 'spoken to' by subs/slaves on the board?

Wake-up call... if they are not yours, tough, there is only one thing you can do about it... don't participate in those discussions. Unless they are yours then you are not in a possition to impose any rules of behaviour on them.

There is one other thing you can do.... look at how many of them 'talk to' others, the respect and friendly banter there. Learn from it and work out why the diffrence. Those Dominants here that are mostly treated respectfully didn't ask the girls to act in any particular way nor try to hold them to any particular standard, they are mostly treated respectfully because the girls have found REASON to respect them.


_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 3:19:05 AM   
NakedGirlScout


Posts: 370
Joined: 1/10/2006
From: Toronto
Status: offline 		Actually, Totalmaster4you, you're the one who has just posted a "bitching" post. May I suggest the ignore/hide/block features of this site to remove those whose words distress you from your sight. You will then never see them again.

(in reply to RavenMuse)
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 4:29:46 AM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline 		I'm sorry but I don't understand what you are asking

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.


~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 4:52:06 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Totalmaster4you

I've been aware of a growing level of bitchiness from those that self identify as slaves and submissives.

wow didn't know there was a growing level of bitchiness from the slave/submissive population.  or maybe because you perceive that every single slave/submissive (collared or not) is yours to "dom" over. 

this is CM  Headline News flash - we're not.

quote:

Diversity of ideas is not welcomed, rampant bitchiness, a lack of discussion is this the standard that we want as our means of exchanging information and maybe making new friends. So what do we say?

what? where does it say in the BDSM bible that individuals cannot have diverse opinions/ideas and that we all have to agree as one accord? there you go again with the bitchiness - we aren't yours to fall at your knees kissing your little toes. and i haven't seen a lack of discussion around here.


_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 5:10:28 AM   
PeggyO


Posts: 129
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Hello,

Based on other posts you've made in other forums, you seem to have an issue in how women express themselves.  I quote " there a number of females that post on here so they can be bitchy plain and simple. " 

My guess is that you have an expectation of behavior from women that doesn't match reality.  When women express themselves in a strong or confident way, my guess is that you interpret it as "bitchy", whereas if a man expressed himself with the exact same words, you wouldn't have a problem with it.

Although your post on this thread was not gender specific, my guess is that you were actually referring to female subs.

Perhaps it might be good not to look at how others are behaving, but rather your expectations and perhaps stereotypes that lead you to see "bitchiness" in what you read.

Be well,

Peggy

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 5:11:07 AM   
leatherorlace


Posts: 215
Joined: 2/21/2005
Status: offline 		That has to be the biggest beltbuckle that, I've ever seen and I spents years in Texas, Arizona, Nevade, California and points in-between. That's larger than any Champeen Rodeo Buckle that has even been won.
  Still,, I guess that it does go along with your Super-Duper Heroes collection.
  What is it about a snivelin' post that escapes, especially whenever it's you that's whining? Maybe you need to read and dissect others reasons or reasonings for any evidence of Bitchiness" before you react to any perceived insult or injury.
Gentry
quote:

ORIGINAL: Totalmaster4you

Greeting to all the Masters, Dominants, Dommes and Tops. I've been reading on this site as well as others and in my humble opinion I've been aware of a growing level of bitchiness from those that self identify as slaves and submissives. We all participate for different reasons, me to add facts if they are lacking and positive outcomes.
Diversity of ideas is not welcomed, rampant bitchiness, a lack of discussion is this the standard that we want as our means of exchanging information and maybe making new friends. So what do we say?

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 5:15:23 AM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline 		There is a forum on these boards where all slaves are supposed to always be pleasing to everyone.  i haven't even seen that accomplished there, let alone on the general boards.  i certainly didn't sign-up for such an arrangement.  Furthermore, i don't "self-identify" as a slave so much as my Master identifies me as such.  i am always respectful to Him and show the general populace as much courtesy as they show me.  i submit to no one but Him and certainly don't defer to everything someone else says simply because they "self-identify" as a dominant individual.  There is certainly no "lack of discussion" in these forums.  Sure, there are those who have their minds made up about things and no amount of reason or logic or facts is going to make a dent but, in general, i think most are open to at least accepting others' ways even if they don't see it as working for them.  Maybe if you adjusted your own attitude a bit and showed more acceptance, you'd find "new friends"...........slave luci 

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 6:04:17 AM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		Oh honey, you haven't seen bitchiness yet. 

Your name here is only that....it's not a state of reality.

_____________________________

You know it's going to be a GOOD blow job when she puts a Breathe Right strip on first.

Pick-up artists and garbage men should trade names.

(in reply to slaveluci)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 6:10:12 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Good luck on winning friends and influencing people with your thread.



_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 6:14:56 AM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		Are you kidding me?  OMG!  Hello? Reality check time.  Read Ravenmuse's reply and get a clue bucko.

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 7:32:06 AM   
wandersalone


Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Totalmaster4you
I've been aware of a growing level of bitchiness from those that self identify as slaves and submissives.


Just out of curiousity, are you implying that it would be okay for the people apart from submissives and slaves to be bitchy?  Would there be some sort of sliding scale, eg the most domly lord of the universe people get to be the bitchiest and a switch can only be bitchy when in dominant mode?

Okay, I have written my bitchy response now to add to it…. The beauty of the internet is that we are forced to let go of our unrealistic expectations of others…unless we want to be constantly disgruntled with the world.  People may feel that the anonymity of the internet allows them to be free-er with their comments, some people may be just as blunt in real life, and being a submissive or slave does not preclude us from having a voice and an opinion.

Ps.  Just as I may disagree with your OP, feel free to disagree with my reply.


_____________________________

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. Martin Luther King
Godmother of the subbie mafia
My all time favourite threads
http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=2002501
http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=790885

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 8:25:07 AM   
maybemaybenot


Posts: 2817
Joined: 9/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Totalmaster4you

I've been aware of a growing level of bitchiness from those that self identify as slaves and submissives.


** enters quietly with head bowed and speaks in a hushed tone*

You nailed it right there !!  They " identify " themselves as slaves and submissives.
Don't let them fool you, they are not twue or real submissives.

** exits on tiptoes, making not a sound, kneels at the door, awaiting permission to leave**

                             mbmbn 

_____________________________

Tolerance of evil is suicide.- NYC Firefighter

When tolerance is not reciprocated, tolerance becomes surrender.

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 8:33:07 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Totalmaster4you

Greeting to all the Masters, Dominants, Dommes and Tops. I've been reading on this site as well as others and in my humble opinion I've been aware of a growing level of bitchiness from those that self identify as slaves and submissives. We all participate for different reasons, me to add facts if they are lacking and positive outcomes.
Diversity of ideas is not welcomed, rampant bitchiness, a lack of discussion is this the standard that we want as our means of exchanging information and maybe making new friends. So what do we say?


I imagine you don't care in the slightest how bitchy dominants/masters/tops/mistresses are.

Well, here is how I look at it: I'm Valyraen's pet, his little subbly kitten. I am not yours and therefore, as far is my behavior is concerned you should regard me as an equal and expect nothing from me in the way of submission. You should not expect subs/slaves that you do not own to be on any sort of "good behavior" to you just because you happen to be a dominant. I may chose to display submissive behavior (obeying when asked) for another dominant out of respect for intelliegence, experience or their treatment of those around them.

For that matter, Valyraen would be quite cross with me if I started changing myself to suit every person out there who happened to stick master in front of their name.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 5/12/2007 8:35:54 AM >

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Totalmaster4you)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 8:35:35 AM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		I think the problem is not the bitchyness from those who self-identify as slaves. I believe it is the perception and reality issue with those who self-identify as Master. That, see, would be you. You are the one having issues. Opinions and other viewpoints ARE valued, but if you interpret all viewpoints different than your wn as bitchy, well theres the rub. If you are posting hoping that there wil be a huge folowing of peple getting behind you to say "Yes, shush the salves, they shouldnt post unless posted to" then forget it. Most of us enjoy the fact tat on the forums, it doesnt matter what role a person plays.  There are no assumed standards as to who can or cant post an opinion or who can or cant get snarky about their replys. Ive aso noticed that the excessive bitchiness hasnt been coming from the slave and sub population lately (self-idenitfied or not whatever that means) but from the smal group of Dominants who seem to think that a persons chosen identiy entitles them so some sort f social standing in the community at lasrge then they complain when they dont get it.

Juts my 2 cents, take them as you will :)
DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to maybemaybenot)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 8:44:57 AM   
MellowSir


Posts: 260
Joined: 4/17/2007
Status: offline 		A lot of people use the forums just to blow off steam it seems, I know I have vented quite a bit about what a waste of time and space a person that claims to be looking yet never answers their mails is, sure I've been shot down plenty and can handle it ok, just a lot of frustration when it's added to vanilla frustrations too lol

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 8:50:30 AM   
shyinini


Posts: 550
Joined: 5/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MellowSir

A lot of people use the forums just to blow off steam it seems, I know I have vented quite a bit about what a waste of time and space a person that claims to be looking yet never answers their mails is, sure I've been shot down plenty and can handle it ok, just a lot of frustration when it's added to vanilla frustrations too lol


I so agree..... they can be posting left and right here and even say they get no mail but when I leave a message on the other side....no response.  

< Message edited by shyinini -- 5/12/2007 8:59:04 AM >

_____________________________

With grace and gratitude, I am owned.
A Man who always seeks to be the best He can be for you
is the only Man truly worthy of being called Sir.


(in reply to MellowSir)
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 8:54:15 AM   
shyinini


Posts: 550
Joined: 5/4/2007
Status: offline 		I agree with Mellow and luci.....
 
But ya know.... 
we all think our thoughts are better than anyones
we all tend to be bitchy, sarcastic, costic and so calloused to others so many times...
just look at the responses here !
we all make generalizations, judge and blah blah blah blah blah blah........
 
Look at the thread !  Look at the responses !!
 
EVERY frikkin one of us is described by the OP !!
 
I dare you to introspect and agree with me.
 

< Message edited by shyinini -- 5/12/2007 9:03:14 AM >

_____________________________

With grace and gratitude, I am owned.
A Man who always seeks to be the best He can be for you
is the only Man truly worthy of being called Sir.


(in reply to AquaticSub)
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RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 9:30:26 AM   
slaveish


Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline 		Going from the title of your thread: What standards do we want?

Our own. And we can all be pretty defensive of them. Very simple.

_____________________________

You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

(in reply to shyinini)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What standards do we want or is it no standards at ... - 5/12/2007 9:35:41 AM   
farieanne


Posts: 65
Joined: 2/24/2007
From: Las Vegas
Status: offline 		i agree with what E/everyone here is saying, that He does not own the sub/slaves here and that they should be thought of as equals and be allowed to "blow" off steam or express themselves freely. However, i also believe that my actions reflect on my Master and though He does not have an account on CM i would never wish others to look down on Him because of me and my actions. i try to always be polite in my responces and post and if i have doubts i wait to post till i can ask my Master.

_____________________________

Master Peter's

"A woman will always sacrifice herself if you give her the opportunity. It is her favourite form of self-indulgence.” - William Somerset Maugham

(in reply to shyinini)
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