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RE: Age and honesty - 6/5/2005 12:40:58 AM

Raphael

Posts: 263
Joined: 5/10/2005
Status: offline

Women lie about their age and weight more often. Men lie about other things more often.

Lieing is still not a good thing to do, regardless of your gender, if you're trying to build a real relationship.

If you're just trying to arrange some hot kinky sex with a stranger, of course, it's perfectly rational to lie a bit. But not too much.

A 200lb 45 year old woman who arranges booty calls by telling guys she's 19 and weighs 125 may not be doing herself any favours, even if she doesn't care about anything beyond the one night stand.

But really, condemning the liar probably isn't a terribly constructive response. Endlessly excusing the lies isn't either... there's a fine line here. Understand why people lie. Realise that you've probably lied at one point or another yourself. Have some sympathy. But remember that it is destructive behaviour, destructive of self and destructive of others, and so it can't be totally excused, however sympathetic the liar.

(in reply to silhouette)

Post #: 41

RE: Age and honesty - 6/5/2005 12:43:46 AM

LdyAuburn

Posts: 179
Joined: 5/9/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: silhouette

Some interesting points have been raised, but still most fail to get it. People lie about age and about weight. Women lie about these things more often than men. Sure you can say well society expects it, or that it is a little itty bitty white lie, but a liar is a liar. If you lie you should not expect the truth from someone else.

Ok so my perception is that my hair is auburn, someone else might say it is brown? or red? Is that a lie or a matter of opinion?

quote:

Women ask for honesty, yet they do not honor those they ask by themselves being honest. Honesty honors both the speaker and the listener. It’s a simple concept. Always tell the truth, do not lie, and do not justify that lie by thinking you are somehow exempt.

Massive generalisation there stating that if one if one lies about the age they are disrespecting the person they are talking with. With regards to always tell the truth perptual truth is not possible.

quote:

Age really matters. At 40 you cannot do what you could at 25. At 50 well, let’s just say, age really really matters. So why would anyone claim they are 40 when they are 50?

So ten years is a lie? How about one year? or 2 years?

quote:

Oh and now here is my pet peeve. How can someone who can’t even balance a checkbook claim to be able to control another’s life?

So to be dominant one needs to be excellent in financial keeping?
Dominants arent perfect Yep I know shock horror

but dominants do get it wrong. For the record I do all the finances in my household. Cooking, now in that I can burn boiled eggs.

Welcome to the forums

(in reply to silhouette)

Post #: 42

RE: Age and honesty - 6/5/2005 1:23:42 AM

Raphael

Posts: 263
Joined: 5/10/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LdyAuburn

quote:

Oh and now here is my pet peeve. How can someone who can’t even balance a checkbook claim to be able to control another’s life?

So to be dominant one needs to be excellent in financial keeping?
Dominants arent perfect Yep I know shock horror but dominants do get it wrong. For the record I do all the finances in my household. Cooking, now in that I can burn boiled eggs.

I'll second that anti-stereotype vote.

I passed an accounting class, I can balance a checkbook when I have to, but it's not my forte and I'd much rather let her handle that end of things and just bring me the reports and come to me for authorisations.

On the other hand, I *love* to cook, and I've yet to find a girl that could match me in the kitchen. Several of my previous girls, in fact, were outright banned from setting foot in my kitchen.

(in reply to LdyAuburn)

Post #: 43

RE: Age and honesty - 6/5/2005 8:00:33 AM

Homewrecker

Posts: 6
Joined: 4/25/2005
Status: offline

I will not agree with someone for agreements sake alone. Most points made here were weak, and easily shown to be a form of self denial. People, my God, just read back what you have said.

In life, those who are truly in control are rarely angry. True leadership is calm, logical, and selfless. But also it is intelligent, well rounded and well educated. Sometimes it takes a lifetime to become a true leader. Best to remember this if you want others to follow your lead.

You can justify, explain, sympathize, condone, argue till your blue in the face, still a lie is a lie is a lie. Any 4 year old knows this. If you cannot be honest with yourself, don't expect that honor to be bestowed upon you by others!

The truth hurts!

Oh and about hair color, well, "We all know you’re a natural blonde."

(in reply to Homewrecker)

Post #: 44

RE: Age and honesty - 6/5/2005 10:10:38 PM

FerDeLance

Posts: 8
Joined: 1/24/2005
Status: offline

So many women defending their lies? Wow and why? I guess the question really must be, "why are all women insecure about age and weight to begin with?"

The reason, the sole and only reason, "men are usually attracted to younger and thinner women." Women worry that they are not as sexually desirable over 45. But telling someone you’re 30 when you look 45 won't fool anyone but yourself. It will only show them you are a liar and a fake.

Yes, men do leave their wives for younger women, true, but lying about age or weight isn’t going to stop that from happening.

Oh and as far as balancing a checkbook is concerned, if you can balance a checkbook, your not fit to be a true Dominant. I do not care what anyone says, you're just too dumb.

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Post #: 45

RE: Age and honesty - 6/5/2005 11:09:32 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: FerDeLance
The reason, the sole and only reason, "men are usually attracted to younger and thinner women." Women worry that they are not as sexually desirable over 45. But telling someone you’re 30 when you look 45 won't fool anyone but yourself. It will only show them you are a liar and a fake.

Yes, men do leave their wives for younger women, true, but lying about age or weight isn’t going to stop that from happening.
So many women defending their lies? Wow and why? I guess the question really must be, "why are all women insecure about age and weight to begin with?"

The reason, the sole and only reason, "men are usually attracted to younger and thinner women." Women worry that they are not as sexually desirable over 45. But telling someone you’re 30 when you look 45 won't fool anyone but yourself. It will only show them you are a liar and a fake.

Yes, men do leave their wives for younger women, true, but lying about age or weight isn’t going to stop that from happening.

if you can balance a checkbook, your not fit to be a true Dominant. I do not care what anyone says, you're just too dumb.

I must say as a Lady, your words give me the warm and fuzzies... I'm surprised you're single, being so loving, respectful, kind, and romantic toward people with XX chromosomes that I'm amazed they're not beating your door down...

I'm going to need headache medicine if I've somehow (though not in any post I've written) given anyone the impression that I defend lies by anyone, or that I care that some man (using the term losely) leaves his Lady for a younger or thinner version. I've never been on the receiving end of "we need to talk" conversation...

Seriously though, I don't and won't care if any man I'm with wants to walk; as much as I am into Dominance and control, I know the only person I control is myself... Anyone else is only along for the ride as long as it suits us both.
To quote GrandpaLash, "I could give a flying fuck" what any man does... I mean if he's just a dick anyway, they sell those in stores, and if he walks I'll buy another. If he's a respectful, loving and kind human being, he'll find the same in me, and I won't fear what he'll do behind my back.. M

< Message edited by BlkTallFullfig -- 6/10/2005 7:33:27 AM >

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to FerDeLance)

Post #: 46

RE: Age and honesty - 6/6/2005 9:28:17 AM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

Generalizations based on gender are silly.

I could just as easily say "red heads lie about their shoe size more often than blondes."

People lie. Some people lie a lot. Others don't.

I don't. You ask, I tell honestly or I tell you I'd prefer not to answer.

To say this is because of my gender is about as accurate as to say it's because of the lenght of my fingers.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Post #: 47

RE: Age and honesty - 6/6/2005 7:45:25 PM

silhouette

Posts: 8
Joined: 12/31/2004
Status: offline

“Generalizations based on gender are silly.”

I would beg to differ, actually most gender based generalization are based in fact. Women certainly can be generalized in many ways. Cosmetic surgery, for instance, God the industry would collapse without women, so would jewelers, dietitians, florists, cosmetics companies, fashion designers, shoe manufactures, many many advertisers, and fur coat killers (my personal fav on this list). The romance novel would certainly disappear, along with the chick flick (Very few academy awards handed out here). French poodles would most certainly be a thing of the past, and so would hair dye, bleach blondes, long fingernails, slut heels (no scratch that one, we gotta keep that one), weight watchers, lipstick, perfume (don’t ya just hate the way they torture rabbits to get the formula right), and of course handbags. And I don’t care what anyone says, real men don’t eat quiche (smile), so that would go too.

As easy as it is to feel that you are being repressed, it is better to think your statements through, and be HONEST in your answer. Oh, I know what the letters will read after this, “men do this, men to that,” but this thread is not about men. It’s all about women, age and honesty.

By the way, the next fur coat I see I am gonna….well I guess if I said what I was gonna do it would be premeditated, so…

(in reply to perverseangelic)

Post #: 48

RE: Age and honesty - 6/7/2005 2:52:00 PM

asissyforher

Posts: 228
Joined: 5/20/2005
From: iowa now..maybe move soon.
Status: offline

Women lie about their age because people lie in general.

quote:

Women lie about their age because people lie in general.

i will guess maybe some lie, but i myself never have. i do not lie, and have not done so since i was maybe 7 or 8 years old.
but to me personally? age is no issue to get in an uproar over. unless as someone said here...it is a legal issue.

but in general? i would say no. i'm sorry. there are bigger lies that i myself would worry over..like 'a' so called domme i met here on this site, and did not even show up after i drove to her so called house and it wasn't even hers, it belonged to some guy that claimed he was her sub, and, it was a run down shack at best. garbage cans, refridgerators, etc outside under the car port. that, is a big lie to me. i drove from arkansas to carolina to see that? oh my gawd!

okay my time is done.
thank you
asissy

(in reply to silhouette)

Post #: 49

RE: Age and honesty - 6/7/2005 5:06:03 PM

onceburned

Posts: 2117
Joined: 1/4/2005
From: Iowa
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: asissyforher
i drove from arkansas to carolina to see that? oh my gawd!.

I remember you! I hope things are going better in Cedar Rapids. If you want to meet at a munch in CR, or Iowa City or Waterloo please let me know.

(in reply to asissyforher)

Post #: 50

RE: Age and honesty - 6/9/2005 9:51:16 AM

Homewrecker

Posts: 6
Joined: 4/25/2005
Status: offline

It really frosts me, when women lie about their age. Just today, just a few minutes ago, after a few days waste of time, a woman sent me her picutres, and voila, she was at the very least 10 years older than she claimed. God, this sucks. Are there at least one or two honest women here or do you all lie and lie and lie??????????????????????????? Women seem to justify anything by saying "It's a mans fault." Another lie certainly.....

(in reply to onceburned)

Post #: 51

RE: Age and honesty - 6/9/2005 10:24:49 AM

dragonofjapan

Posts: 91
Joined: 6/30/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: pain4hispleasure

Yea, I'm 43, and I struggled with worrying about it. It's like we're conditioned to think we're not attractive if we're older! Yea, some people won't like it, but the people who don't care are the ones you want to know anyway! :)

I looked at your profile and you have kept yourself well. If I met you on the street I would not think you were 43.

So if I am a 32 year old guy who has been meeting women up to 38 and the "slender 34 year old" turns out to be a slender 150 pound 5'2" 38 and looking 58, I start thinking I only want to look at the 33 down group.

When I meet people in real life, they are way off on my age. I have people younger than I am who look old tell me "when you get older, like I am" and my daughters are falling on the floor.

My last girlfriend was in her 20's, she had no idea how old I was. It did not matter. Until she learned and then her mind began working. And her friends kept at her.

America is an age obessessed culture.

Go look at threads about older men and younger women and see what a big deal most people make of it. OF course there are the very PC, who will tell you age does not matter.

I have no good answer than to say, I expect everyone I meet to be far different than their picture or their profile. I find it is a good starting place.

_____________________________

He who rules truly serves
She who serves truly rules

Life is not measured by the breaths we take,
but by the things which take our breath away

Honor is not making good choices,
it is dealing with the consequences.

(in reply to pain4hispleasure)

Post #: 52

RE: Age and honesty - 6/9/2005 10:28:42 AM

RandBcouple

Posts: 86
Joined: 5/19/2005
Status: offline

My former Master lied about his age, he turned out to be 10 years older than what he claimed to be...i found out about it on my own, six months into the relationship. i definately don't think lying about age is a female thing only, plenty of men on here do it as well. i see pictures of men that look like they're on medicare claiming to be in their forties!

That's simply ridiculous to lie about ones age, and it's just as ridiculous to assume that all women lie about it.

(in reply to silhouette)

Post #: 53

RE: Age and honesty - 6/9/2005 10:38:03 PM

Authentic

Posts: 11
Joined: 6/9/2005
Status: offline

Lets get right to it. All woman lie about their age after menapause. "I'm 40" yeah right! It makes me sick to read the justifications here? Hey get real.

(in reply to RandBcouple)

Post #: 54

RE: Age and honesty - 6/9/2005 10:44:59 PM

SweetDommes

Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline

"All women lie about their age after menapause" ... really ... then you have talked to EVERY single woman on the planet who is past menopause about this? All of them? Wow, you must have a lot of free time on your hands. Perhaps you should spend more of it on a hobby or something and less of it bitching about people who lie. I know just as many males who have lied about age/weight/marital status/living arrangements/etc. as females.

For the record, I am NOT saying that women don't lie, just that women are no more likely to lie than men - it's a personality thing, not a gender thing. I am NOT trying to justify lieing - it's wrong no matter who does it or what they are lieing about. I AM tired of this being deemed something that only women do and/or that all women do.

< Message edited by SweetDommes -- 6/9/2005 10:45:44 PM >

(in reply to Authentic)

Post #: 55

RE: Age and honesty - 6/10/2005 12:09:46 AM

onceburned

Posts: 2117
Joined: 1/4/2005
From: Iowa
Status: offline

quote:

I AM tired of this being deemed something that only women do and/or that all women do.

As am I. I was trying not to respond to trollish comments, but agree that the incessant barking has been fairly annoying.

BTW, you don't -really- believe that guys would lie about their marital status, do you?

< Message edited by onceburned -- 6/10/2005 9:12:58 AM >

(in reply to SweetDommes)

Post #: 56

RE: Age and honesty - 6/10/2005 7:26:21 AM

ProtagonistLily

Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Insecurity. I don't see how your age matters as long as you don't look haggard

My dear, your youth is showing through ~grin~ Even the old and ugly are allowed in the scene ;)

Lily,

_____________________________

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"
~Dr. Seuss~

(in reply to junecleaver)

Post #: 57

RE: Age and honesty - 6/10/2005 7:37:49 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

Are there at least one or two honest women here or do you all lie and lie and lie???????????????????????????

after reading your profile, it seems that you are interested in having a dishonest woman.....lying about being a cousin, lying about the guest bedroom being out-of-order, why do you care if she lies about her age as well?

(in reply to Homewrecker)

Post #: 58

RE: Age and honesty - 6/10/2005 7:43:39 AM

quietkitten

Posts: 1082
Joined: 2/5/2005
From: Alberta, Canada
Status: offline

Nope sorry Homewrecker..... being a woman I have no choice but lie my ass off..... it's genetic don't ya know????

Sorry for being sarcastic, but speaking of things that frost one's ass, I become truly annoyed by those who make broad sweeping generalizations about a group based solely on their X/Y chromosome components.

(in reply to Homewrecker)

Post #: 59

RE: Age and honesty - 6/10/2005 9:49:24 AM

SweetDommes

Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: onceburned

quote:

I AM tired of this being deemed something that only women do and/or that all women do.

As am I. I was trying not to respond to trollish comments, but agree that the incessant barking has been fairly annoying.

BTW, you don't -really- believe that guys would lie about their marital status, do you?

Oh, no, of course guys would never lie about their marital status [/wide eyed innocent look and extreme sarcasm]

My favorite was the guy that I had been chatting with off and on for maybe 2-3 months. He was quite sincere, had given none of the normal clues that he was involved with anyone, and suddenly, I got a message from his screen name saying that it was his wife and that she had caught him doing "very bad things" and that he wouldn't be online anymore. His yahoo profile was changed to contain a wedding pic (and yes, it was of the same guy that I had gotten pics of in the past from that screen name) and his profile here was deleted. I was pissed (thus the journal entry about what "single" really means).

(in reply to onceburned)

Post #: 60

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