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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 5:31:15 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		Though I take My Dominant responsibilities of this nature very seriously,-- I always have,-- I call it integrity--and that to Me far surpasses one's persuasions---
 
However, I greatly agree with this statement:
 
quote:

this goes hand in hand with my observation too many dom's got into the lifestyle as a way of getting laid without the hinderance of developing a valid relationship....and then let thier slaves/subs/bottoms swing (go undefended) when there is other trouble. 



I see far too many people ( men and women) in this persuasion see it as a means to "procure--Dominant" or "secure--submissive"---a nice cooshy means of sex, being taken care of, no responsibilities and no real valid relationship involvement---without hijacking this thread, I see it as a sad sign on the times---and integrity is the first thing in the sewer.
 

 
 
 

< Message edited by MHOO314 -- 8/28/2007 5:49:22 AM >

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 6:06:51 AM   
Perplex


Posts: 110
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		please hijack away Mhoo, a discussion of integrity in the world and life is always in order...and fun to watch if you have popcorn. 

there is  a pagan ...um...we'll call it saying, that goes "the king is the land and the land is the king"...if the land is bad the king will get sick if the king is bad the land will, is what it sums up to mean, and whatever the illness the other will suffer in like kind. 

the essential tools incuding integrity comes from those magic ages of 1 to 3...if you don't learn it then you won't really ever learn it, you can emulate it, you can substitue ethics for morality but you won't ever completely be committed to it the way a person who is truely moral will.  and as our parenting skills get less and less, --and I'll let the talk radio guys tell you why that happened, cuz they seem to know everything about everything, we lose little words like integrity and honor and justice. 

it is true, kings have always been crooks (cattle thieves) but as kingship took root they learned they had to do thing in a just manner because it was good for business....nothing hurt the pocketbook like a peasant uprising so those peasant's children learned doing things in a just manner was both wise and good. 

but we've had two generations of kings who'se sense of integrity goes only so far as the sound byte that will get them out of this weeks scandal so its not that surprising that doms see thier responsiblity ends at the end of htier dripping cocks but demand somebody make breakfast the next day at the same time.  and in times of trouble they hide behind the fact it is just a sex thing

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 6:07:57 AM   
Bobkgin


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From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

I see far too many people ( men and women) in this persuasion see it as a means to "procure--Dominant" or "secure--submissive"---a nice cooshy means of sex, being taken care of, no responsibilities and no real valid relationship involvement---without hijacking this thread, I see it as a sad sign on the times---and integrity is the first thing in the sewer.
 


I disagree.

In such 'relationships': integrity was never there to begin with.

That's why such 'relationships' arise.

Perhaps it is just me but I see Integrity and a capacity to love going hand-in-hand.

YMMV

< Message edited by Bobkgin -- 8/28/2007 6:08:53 AM >

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 6:26:53 AM   
Smythe


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I honestly don't see what any of this has to do with DS, BDSM, or WIITWD. It's all about relationships in general; love, responsibility and as MH says, integrity.

I would stand up for my children, my best friends, my partners or simply someone who I thought was right.
Smythe



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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 6:51:59 AM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
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Status: offline 		Wow!!....Very impressive!!!...Doms that can defy time and space....That can leap tall buildings with a single bound....Remember the guy who got shot at the beginning of this post?  Pussy!!!  My domliness can stop bullets...Confronting mother in laws?...Sheeeeeeeit!..I'd have made that bitch blow me!...Making a forty five minute  trip in ten?....Christ!! I would have gone back in time and after ten minutes of labor, I would have used a pocket knife and done the mother fucking C-section myself!!.....I can stop mutherfuckin' bullets ......I am King Fucking Kong!!!

From "Training Day"

Alonzo Harris: Aww, you motherfuckers. Okay. Alright. I'm putting cases on all you bitches. Huh. You think you can do this shit... Jake. You think you can do this to me? You motherfuckers will be playing basketball in Pelican Bay when I get finished with you. SHU program, nigga. 23 hour lockdown. I'm the man up in this piece. You'll never see the light of... who the fuck do you think you're fucking with? I'm the police, I run shit around here. You just live here. Yeah, that's right, you better walk away. Go on and walk away... 'cause I'm gonna' burn this motherfucker down. King Kong ain't got shit on me. That's right, that's right. Shit, I don't, fuck. I'm winning anyway, I'm winning... I'm winning any motherfucking way. I can't lose. Yeah, you can shoot me, but you can't kill me.

Alonzo Harris: I run shit here! Y'all just live here!


Alonzo Harris: King Kong ain't got shit on me!


I am "The Dom"...Ya'll ain't got shit on me.

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 6:59:54 AM   
caught4u


Posts: 132
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Status: offline 		i fight my own battles, and don't expect anyone to "come to my rescue" .  it is appreciated when i have the support of a loved one and i do support the ones i love.

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 7:01:04 AM   
Perplex


Posts: 110
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		short answer Smythe is, cuz it does...a dom is in a position to create holes in the personality of a sub if they do things the wrong way...and so has to have an idea of what they are doing..and be there to protect them during that phase when the sub is learning to be who they are on the outside the way they've been on the inside most of their lives.

Long answer is, ..and gods forgive me I'm going to sound like the old guard here...if you are just tieing people down or giivng a whack on the bottom..even in extreme measures, you're not using dominance or submission...that is a mental thing, an emotional thing and a thing both sides ahve to take with bloody great earnest or somebody is going to get hurt in ways that it will take more than bandaids and a little bactine to fix.

**I'm not judging folks just into the kink, if that is your thing, then gods bless and have fun...**

in a D/s relationship that will make a difference to a person's life...not just be a kinky fuck that is a mild amusing memory the dom has to be there in his(her) total commitment to his (her) sub ..I'll site you an example, remember the best teacher you had in school, now how much of what you learned from him/her would be spoiled if you found out they  did something you could not respect...or left you to fend for yourself at a moment of weakness when they said they'd be there for you always. 

there was a time when all of this lifestyle was taboo, that things really did matter in how you conducted yourself, both with your sub(s) and were viewed by the community at large, now things are more acceptable to society and like healing from child abuse the stigma attached to it has lessened so its just "another hurdle" to get through as you turn from a post-teen into the adult you'll be. 

yet...  yet... there are still folks looking to get a scratch itched which no amount of playtime will fix, and because the basic integrity of the lifestyle has been dilluted by the poulartiy of hte lifestyle, they may well never find the answers they are looking for in any real or meaningful way. 

I hope you are one of hte lucky ones who has found everything you want from the lifestyle...but there are those still seeking deep answers nothing short of doing the work will fix.  just opinions, and I'm as wrong as often as anyone. 

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 7:13:24 AM   
Perplex


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quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

Wow!!....Very impressive!!!...Doms that can defy time and space....That can leap tall buildings with a single bound....Remember the guy who got shot at the beginning of this post?  Pussy!!! 

I am "The Dom"...Ya'll ain't got shit on me.


Dom, I'm goin ask you something...and this has to do with your pragmantic sense of getting shot being worth it...ever been ashamed of something you didn't do?  would you go back and relive that moment when you made the wrong choice even if it cost you all the days between then and now? 

the old guy who got shot wouldn't have lived with himself if he hadn't tried...or maybe he's in heaven or hell just now going "i shoulda run"...either way he did what he did by his sense of honor, just like you gotta live by yours and I gotta live by mine...

no flesh can't stop bullets, but bullets can only take life not self respect...if that's the way you think, and if not then your way is right for you.  To me, there are a hundred thousand rats surviving in the jungle everyday but there is only 1 king lion...it's what you wanna be.  I've been shot, cut and lost 13 teeth when I thought I had to stand up you ain't gotta stand tall, but you gotta stand sometimes. 

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 7:18:05 AM   
Rover


Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline 		I am invariably annoyed when folks try to establish universal responsibilities, requirements, etc. for being a "true" Dominant, submissive, sack of feces... whatever.  Honestly, when will people realize that all these expressions are merely differing versions of "the one true way" that does not exist?
 
John

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 7:20:38 AM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Perplex

there was a time when all of this lifestyle was taboo, that things really did matter in how you conducted yourself, both with your sub(s) and were viewed by the community at large, now things are more acceptable to society and like healing from child abuse the stigma attached to it has lessened so its just "another hurdle" to get through as you turn from a post-teen into the adult you'll be. 

yet...  yet... there are still folks looking to get a scratch itched which no amount of playtime will fix, and because the basic integrity of the lifestyle has been dilluted by the poulartiy of hte lifestyle, they may well never find the answers they are looking for in any real or meaningful way. 

I hope you are one of hte lucky ones who has found everything you want from the lifestyle...but there are those still seeking deep answers nothing short of doing the work will fix.  just opinions, and I'm as wrong as often as anyone. 


Well if so, you'll have company.

The commercialization of bdsm has eroded the values that went with it.

To sell to as many people as possible the idea of bdsm, the qualities focused upon are those that appeal to the largest mass of people: namely kinky sex.

As with most everything else, those who strive to understand the deeper context which makes bdsm a lifestyle and not just hanging from the chandeliers become more and more the exception rather than the rule.

And of course, it also makes us the butt of jokes by those who have no clue and aren't interested in getting one.

For some, its all about the orgasm.

For me, it is about demonstrating the qualities that inspire a slave to willingly, joyfully, eagerly surrender herself to me every day of her life.

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 7:31:40 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I think the problem begins at the beguine- suggesting that one's behavior has or should have ANYTHING to do with one's personal internal orientation.  The two are completely separate.

Once you begin to connect the two, all sorts of problems happen- including this, including the "he's too quiet to be a dom" or "she's too bossy to be a slave" and on and on and on.  Everyone begins to be upset that they aren't fitting into the "dom" or "sub" box just because they like to do things in the "non standard" way.

Insane really, but it's how we do it.

So let's just sever that connection rightly once and for all.  Behavior has NOTHING TO DO with one's relationship orientation.  Any person of any orientation can and act in any possible way they want.  Your job is to decide if you accept or support their particular behavior and choose to associate yourself with them.

< Message edited by LuckyAlbatross -- 8/28/2007 7:44:07 AM >

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 7:47:45 AM   
Rover


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin

The commercialization of bdsm has eroded the values that went with it.


Please provide some historical context and reference the historians and articles that support your contention of an association between BDSM and values.

quote:


To sell to as many people as possible the idea of bdsm, the qualities focused upon are those that appeal to the largest mass of people: namely kinky sex.


Why does it bother you that other people practice a version of BDSM that is unrelated to your own?  Do you feel that it detracts from what you do or feel?  Are you saying that they shouldn't practice BDSM to achieve their own fulfillment and gratification, and that your fulfillment and gratification has supremacy?

quote:


As with most everything else, those who strive to understand the deeper context which makes bdsm a lifestyle and not just hanging from the chandeliers become more and more the exception rather than the rule.


I'm sorry, I don't sense much understanding or deeper context from you.  Just a bunch of condemnation, superiority and "one true way"-ism.

quote:


And of course, it also makes us the butt of jokes by those who have no clue and aren't interested in getting one.


You're right, those clues seem to be in short supply.  I can suggest where you might acquire one.

quote:


For some, its all about the orgasm.


And for some it's not.  So what?  Just keep reminding yourself that there's no "one true way".

quote:


For me, it is about demonstrating the qualities that inspire a slave to willingly, joyfully, eagerly surrender herself to me every day of her life.


Very kewl.  I can appreciate and relate to this as a personal statement.  Where you stray is in projecting your personal values to the entirety of BDSM.  That's intolerant and plenty of other adjectives.
 
John

< Message edited by Rover -- 8/28/2007 7:48:55 AM >

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 7:51:30 AM   
domiguy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Perplex

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

Wow!!....Very impressive!!!...Doms that can defy time and space....That can leap tall buildings with a single bound....Remember the guy who got shot at the beginning of this post?  Pussy!!! 

I am "The Dom"...Ya'll ain't got shit on me.


Dom, I'm goin ask you something...and this has to do with your pragmantic sense of getting shot being worth it...ever been ashamed of something you didn't do?  would you go back and relive that moment when you made the wrong choice even if it cost you all the days between then and now? 

the old guy who got shot wouldn't have lived with himself if he hadn't tried...or maybe he's in heaven or hell just now going "i shoulda run"...either way he did what he did by his sense of honor, just like you gotta live by yours and I gotta live by mine...

no flesh can't stop bullets, but bullets can only take life not self respect...if that's the way you think, and if not then your way is right for you.  To me, there are a hundred thousand rats surviving in the jungle everyday but there is only 1 king lion...it's what you wanna be.  I've been shot, cut and lost 13 teeth when I thought I had to stand up you ain't gotta stand tall, but you gotta stand sometimes. 

Yep. you gotta stand sometimes....Maybe the "old guy" is in Heaven or Hell and thinking, "God I was so stupid! I lost my life over a car and the fact that some stranger with a gun called my woman a bitch."  I'm sure he is thrilled by the outcome of his actions.  Who is to say he didn't place more value on the car than the woman?

Here are the facts, Jack....Guy has a gun...He can have my car, he can call you a bitch....In fact, if he wants, I'll even agree with him..If it is apparent that the altercation is going to go further then I have a decision to make....It probably isn't going to end to pretty for ol' Domiguy.

Maybe you have been shot, cut and lost thirteen teeth because you are an asshole?...It is a possibility...Maybe you pushed things?...Maybe you aren't really as tough as you thought you were?...Maybe you are the type that isn't capable of learning life's lessons after you were first shot or cut or spit out your first tooth?

It pains me to watch people come out here and portray themselves as the cure all for all  plagues feminine...I can cure self esteem issues, vaginal itch as well as osteoporosis.  Good for you! Maybe there are woman out here will gladly buy what you are selling...P.T. Barnum would be proud.

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 8:36:25 AM   
Perplex


Posts: 110
Joined: 8/27/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy


Maybe you have been shot, cut and lost thirteen teeth because you are an asshole?...It is a possibility...Maybe you pushed things?...Maybe you aren't really as tough as you thought you were?...Maybe you are the type that isn't capable of learning life's lessons after you were first shot or cut or spit out your first tooth?

guilty on all four counts

quote:

ORGINAL: dominguy

It pains me to watch people come out here and portray themselves as the cure all for all  plagues feminine...I can cure self esteem issues, vaginal itch as well as osteoporosis.  Good for you! Maybe there are woman out here will gladly buy what you are selling...P.T. Barnum would be proud.


it's always interesting to me to see people accuse what theyr'e guilty of...lairs assume liars, thieves figure everybody steals...so tell me Dom, how is the pimpdaddy routine wroking out for you?  I don't think I have the cure for anything except how to turn a meal into a lump of shit...I did make one bad assumption as Albatros pointed out in another post for me, and that was figuring my own knight errant complex was the same as women needing to be saved...but the only way you figure out how to do things right is by doing things wrong first...

and as far as selling anything...I dunno, I kinda think if I was selling something,  the frantic incontentent puppy routine wouldn't be my first choice I think I would go with something slick and too cool to be touched so I could show women how cool I was and that I was too cool to be touched.  You gotta be you, I gotta be me either way it's still goin' rain, scotch still costs too damn much and and nobody plays willie-ball on the diamonds anymore. 

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 8:58:28 AM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Perplex

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy


Maybe you have been shot, cut and lost thirteen teeth because you are an asshole?...It is a possibility...Maybe you pushed things?...Maybe you aren't really as tough as you thought you were?...Maybe you are the type that isn't capable of learning life's lessons after you were first shot or cut or spit out your first tooth?

guilty on all four counts

quote:

ORGINAL: dominguy

It pains me to watch people come out here and portray themselves as the cure all for all  plagues feminine...I can cure self esteem issues, vaginal itch as well as osteoporosis.  Good for you! Maybe there are woman out here will gladly buy what you are selling...P.T. Barnum would be proud.


it's always interesting to me to see people accuse what theyr'e guilty of...lairs assume liars, thieves figure everybody steals...so tell me Dom, how is the pimpdaddy routine wroking out for you?  I don't think I have the cure for anything except how to turn a meal into a lump of shit...I did make one bad assumption as Albatros pointed out in another post for me, and that was figuring my own knight errant complex was the same as women needing to be saved...but the only way you figure out how to do things right is by doing things wrong first...

and as far as selling anything...I dunno, I kinda think if I was selling something,  the frantic incontentent puppy routine wouldn't be my first choice I think I would go with something slick and too cool to be touched so I could show women how cool I was and that I was too cool to be touched.  You gotta be you, I gotta be me either way it's still goin' rain, scotch still costs too damn much and and nobody plays willie-ball on the diamonds anymore. 


Just so you know this wasn't all directed at you...Could have written and worded it better.  I saw your post on the other thread and it made sense...Good Scotch does cost too much and unfortunately Willie-ball, today, is seldom seen.  At the end of the day, there is little sense in yelling at the rain.

There has been of late a few posters who have made a point of being the cure all...It seems they have got stuck in time. The world is colder, people no longer say thank you, what happened to all of the grace?

You can bitch about the rain and try and block it...It still is coming down...So you have a choice to accept it, move to higher ground and do your best to remain dry....or continually bitch about the fact about how cold and wet you are...That your house is gone even though it was built in a flood plain....And you can't understand how either occurence has happened.

I like women and subs who show accountability...That are capable and have shown the capability of making sound decisions with or without my guidance...Someone who is equal but has chosen to submit...Anyone can get someone weaker to bow down...By sheer force or power or by using intelligence as a manipulating factor...That has never struck me as very compelling method of dominance and the sub who would fall prey to this methodology would certainly not hold my interest for very long.

Off the subject, but I am prone to hijacks...I have never sought the weak but the strong...I love big personalities, women who are not inheritantly flawed or looking to be saved...I can only imagine that this type of woman would appeal to you as well.  Take care.

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 9:03:11 AM   
charmdpetKeira


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quote:

Mr. Trendy just sat there watching. 


Maybe he considered it humiliation play?

I would think it is just as important for a person to know how to handle such a situation on their own, as it would be important for someone to step in if things got out of hand.
If I had a Dom who felt he needed to jump to my rescue every time I had an altercation; what would that make me? It doesn't look good from where I'm standing.

k

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 9:23:40 AM   
Perplex


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quote:

ORIGINAL: charmdpetKeira

If I had a Dom who felt he needed to jump to my rescue every time I had an altercation; what would that make me? It doesn't look good from where I'm standing.

k


I did learn something about myself today which is always a good thing, but I'm half surprised about the assumption that a dom caring for his sub means the sub cannot take care of her/himself.  Standing up to protect something doesn't inherently mean the thing in question can't protect itself....case in point a couple of weeks ago I just had a disgreement with my agent and he wanted to drop me, it was a misunderstanding on both our parts based on bad communication, my writing partner who also uses the same agent stepped in and straigtened things out as a third party he could take that spot of diplomacy but he (and I) never assumed I couldn't take care of myself even to the lengths of getting another agent.  I was not cast into the weaker role cuz I took his help or him the stronger cuz he gave it..and it surprises me the largly female assumption has been I considered the woman who spilled the barbeque over the guy needed my help cuz she was weak, she was in a bad spot and her SO could have helped out the way me and my buddy did we weren't looking at the woman as weaker or not able to do it, just we were in a better position (having not just dumped scalding barbeque sauce over the guy) to be able to calm things down quickly

prejudice works both ways, and it means preconceived judgement, just cuz there have been a thousand other asshats before me, doesn't mean I'm not capable of putting my asshat up on the shelf with my Mr. T. Mohawk wig and my disco shoes with the dead fish inside of them. 

silly point: Charmed I love you eye graphic in your avatar thingie (yes I'm highly proficient at techincal terms)

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RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 9:40:18 AM   
Rover


Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Perplex

short answer Smythe is, cuz it does...a dom is in a position to create holes in the personality of a sub if they do things the wrong way...


Is not the "wrong way" (and by extension, the "right way") different for each unique relationship?

quote:


and so has to have an idea of what they are doing..and be there to protect them during that phase when the sub is learning to be who they are on the outside the way they've been on the inside most of their lives.


Only if that particular submissive needs "protection", and both the Dominant and submissive have agreed that said protection will be provided.  See, knowing "what they are doing" is not universal for all submissives in all power exchange relationships.  They do not all need or want the same things from their Dominant or their relationship.

quote:


Long answer is, ..and gods forgive me I'm going to sound like the old guard here...if you are just tieing people down or giivng a whack on the bottom..even in extreme measures, you're not using dominance or submission...that is a mental thing, an emotional thing and a thing both sides ahve to take with bloody great earnest or somebody is going to get hurt in ways that it will take more than bandaids and a little bactine to fix.


Agreed, there is a difference between sensation play (Topping and bottoming) and power exchange relationships (Dominance and submission).  But I question the implication that the emotional and mental component inherent to power exchange relationships is "more than" relationships in any other lifestyle.  Relationships, including the level of emotional and mental involvement, differ vastly from individual to individual in all lifestyles.  Infering anything different is just buying into the overly romanticized version of power exchange relationships as portrayed in erotic fictional novels.  Don't misunderstand what I'm saying... on the individual level  power exchange relationships can be "more than" other relationship dynamics.  But they can also be "less than" or "equal to".  All relationships are what you make of them.

quote:


**I'm not judging folks just into the kink, if that is your thing, then gods bless and have fun...**


I'll accept that, but it seems as though you're inching quite close to judging what all power exchange relationships "should" be, or strive to be.  That's equally inappropriate.

quote:


in a D/s relationship that will make a difference to a person's life...not just be a kinky fuck that is a mild amusing memory the dom has to be there in his(her) total commitment to his (her) sub ..


As an open minded and tolerant person, I'm sure you'll agree that there is no "cookie cutter" relationship dynamic that "makes a difference" to every person's life, or that the difference it makes is universally "good" or "bad".  Consequently, it's inappropriate to say what the Dominant "has" to do.  What the Dominant (or submissive) "has" to do is whatever they have agreed upon, which is not a universally agreed upon set of requirements or obligations.  Finally, when you bring terms such as "total commitment" into the discussion, it simply makes an already difficult topic nearly indecipherable.  What is "total commitment"?  Is it being by their side, 24/7?  Is it tending to their every want and desire?  It's just another relative term that will never achieve consensus opinion and makes the Dominant you speak of sound rather submissive in my view.

quote:


I'll site you an example, remember the best teacher you had in school, now how much of what you learned from him/her would be spoiled if you found out they  did something you could not respect...or left you to fend for yourself at a moment of weakness when they said they'd be there for you always. 


The best teachers helped me find my own answers, whose "truth" is not dependant upon anyone other than me.  Teachers are not deities, upon which an entire belief system rests.  Unless you're talking about the religious use of the term "teacher".  And frankly, much of what you and Bob have to share has much less to do with BDSM than it does religion. 

quote:


there was a time when all of this lifestyle was taboo, that things really did matter in how you conducted yourself, both with your sub(s) and were viewed by the community at large, now things are more acceptable to society and like healing from child abuse the stigma attached to it has lessened so its just "another hurdle" to get through as you turn from a post-teen into the adult you'll be. 


Seriously, what in the world are you talking about?  If BDSM has become acceptable to mainstream society, I must have missed the memo.  Please share it with me.  And comparing child abuse with "another hurdle" to get through, or comparing BDSM with child abuse?  Honestly, that doesn't demonstrate a very clear understanding of either topic.

quote:


yet...  yet... there are still folks looking to get a scratch itched which no amount of playtime will fix, and because the basic integrity of the lifestyle has been dilluted by the poulartiy of hte lifestyle, they may well never find the answers they are looking for in any real or meaningful way. 


Integrity of the lifestyle?  What erotic fictional novel did you get that from?  How do you know what answers people are looking for or what is meaningful to them? 

quote:


I hope you are one of hte lucky ones who has found everything you want from the lifestyle...but there are those still seeking deep answers nothing short of doing the work will fix.  just opinions, and I'm as wrong as often as anyone. 


There are also those seeking nothing more than a good whipping, yet you seem to denigrate their choices.  If "deep answers" are what someone wants, more power to them.  If faceless kinky sex is what they want, that's kewl as well.  What is not kewl is to portray an historical reliance upon virtues that never existed, or to assign qualities to BDSM that are unrealistic, or to elevate one personal choice/preference to a position of supremacy over all others for the entirety of the lifestyle. 
 
John

< Message edited by Rover -- 8/28/2007 9:49:33 AM >

_____________________________

"Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions."

Sri da Avabhas

(in reply to Perplex)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 9:45:09 AM   
Tigrita


Posts: 484
Joined: 8/16/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:


I would think it is just as important for a person to know how to handle such a situation on their own, as it would be important for someone to step in if things got out of hand.
If I had a Dom who felt he needed to jump to my rescue every time I had an altercation; what would that make me? It doesn't look good from where I'm standing.

k


I second that.

(in reply to charmdpetKeira)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Also part of the game: Dom responsability - 8/28/2007 9:47:43 AM   
Alumbrado


Posts: 5560
Status: offline
quote:

And frankly, much of what you and Bob have to share has much less to do with BDSM than it does religion.


Noticed that, did ya?

quote:

What is not kewl is to portray an historical reliance upon virtues that never existed, or to assign qualities to BDSM that are unrealistic, or to elevate one personal to a position of supremacy over all others for the entirety of the lifestyle.  


How else is one going to become a level 75 Dark Elven warrior Dom with plus 8 enhanced Leather Pants of Invincibility?

(in reply to Rover)
Profile   Post #: 40
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