RE: No Limits: How far would you go?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: No Limits: How far would you go?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: No Limits: How far would you go?

Page: << < prev 14 15 [16] 17 18 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 11:37:28 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

prop, again I will say that it's not about you and him. It's about not being willing to say "it's ok for Master's/Dominants to take individuals who are incapable of consent (mentally incompetent) and abuse them at will under the umbrella of this lifestyle.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to daddysprop247)

Post #: 301

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 11:47:32 AM

Bobkgin

Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

prop, again I will say that it's not about you and him. It's about not being willing to say "it's ok for Master's/Dominants to take individuals who are incapable of consent (mentally incompetent) and abuse them at will under the umbrella of this lifestyle.

Prop said she gave herself a year before she was declared mentally incompetent.

Are you saying a master must leave if she is ever declared mentally incompetent?

Are you saying he can stay, but only if he breaks her of the habit of thinking him her master?

How would you resolve this problem?

Arrest Daddy and institutionalize Prop?

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 302

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 11:57:18 AM

BeingChewsie

Posts: 1633
Joined: 10/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

It is not a situation that I wish to see promoted as an acceptable example of what this lifestyle should be allowed to encompass.

Should be allowed to encompass?

Allowed by whom?

So who gets to decides what should and should not be allowed in "this" lifestyle?

_____________________________

"In fact, it is my contention that most women are accepting of way less than optimal circumstance constantly, and are lucky to be 'snagged' by the right man, if ever. But it is more by happy accident than by their design. "
~Ron and Hup

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 303

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 12:01:13 PM

Bobkgin

Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BeingChewsie

quote:

It is not a situation that I wish to see promoted as an acceptable example of what this lifestyle should be allowed to encompass.

Should be allowed to encompass?

Allowed by whom?

So who gets to decides what should and should not be allowed in "this" lifestyle?

The Hecklers, of course.

The ones who antics shut down threads and insult posters in the hope of chasing them off (or using them as examples of why the Heckler is so superior over other life forms).

The Hecklers have always been the final arbiters over what can be discussed in a BDSM forum.

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to BeingChewsie)

Post #: 304

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 12:28:44 PM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

Bob, did you yourself not say this just a few pages ago?:

quote:

With respect, are we now saying it is okay for clinically insane people to be involved in BDSM?

Assuming such an individual is not institutionalized for his own safety, since when did the BDSM community agree that those who are not "Sane" can effectively and competently make decisions with respect to their participation in BDSM?

How far down the ladder of insanity do we go before it is "not ok"?

I believe that as a competent person I could consent to a myriad of things. But say after I give my consent I drink a fifth of Jack Daniels, take some mind altering substance, have a stroke that impairs my brain function....or become involuntarily committed to a psychiatric institution and be declared to be legally incompetent.....any and all of those things would in turn invalidate any prior consent to present or future circumstances until such time that the condition was alleviated to such a degree that I once again became deemed competent. No I am not saying that he should have left her....but at the point at which she could no longer be held accountable and responsible for making her own choices, her consent to be abused by him could no longer be considered valid.

daddysprop has been detailing this relationship for a couple of years now on this site. She has detailed a life where she has never known anything other than abuse. Abuse that has left her so broken that she is now incapable and incompetent. Do you think that the honorable thing to do is to take her and abuse her further? Is that what dominance is?

Now, take daddysprop and her Daddy out of the equation entirely. Do you think that we should send a message that we think that it's ok for competent people to abuse incompetent people under the guise of dominance? Would it be okay to do so to invalids? The mentally retarded? As you yourself said, how far down the ladder of insanity do we go before it's "not ok"?

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to Bobkgin)

Post #: 305

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 1:20:05 PM

Bobkgin

Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Bob, did you yourself not say this just a few pages ago?:

quote:

With respect, are we now saying it is okay for clinically insane people to be involved in BDSM?

Assuming such an individual is not institutionalized for his own safety, since when did the BDSM community agree that those who are not "Sane" can effectively and competently make decisions with respect to their participation in BDSM?

How far down the ladder of insanity do we go before it is "not ok"?

Actually, what I said was:

quote:

With respect, are we now saying it is okay for clinically insane people to be involved in BDSM?

Assuming such an individual is not institutionalized for his own safety, since when did the BDSM community agree that those who are not "Sane" can effectively and competently make decisions with respect to their participation in BDSM?

How far down the ladder of insanity do we go before it is "not ok"?

on edit: I'll make clear this is in the context of a verifiable organic disorder affecting cognitive processes (ie a brain tumour). Non-organic disorders is yet another can of worms waiting to be opened.

(Pg. 5, Post #95 for those who like to verify such things).

I should also point out that the above was in the context of a -master- developing a cognitive disability, not a slave.

As I said to you a few posts back:

quote:

Having seen how some people report what I've said, I'll take that with a sizable grain of salt.

(Pg. 14, Post #267)

quote:

I believe that as a competent person I could consent to a myriad of things. But say after I give my consent I drink a fifth of Jack Daniels, take some mind altering substance, have a stroke that impairs my brain function....or become involuntarily committed to a psychiatric institution and be declared to be legally incompetent.....any and all of those things would in turn invalidate any prior consent to present or future circumstances until such time that the condition was alleviated to such a degree that I once again became deemed competent.

Incorrect.

Marriage remains intact. Power of Attorney, Wills, and other such instruments remain in effect.

Once you are deemed legally incompetent you are legally -prevented- from changing any prior arrangement.

It is up to your legal Guardian to see to it.

quote:

No I am not saying that he should have left her....but at the point at which she could no longer be held accountable and responsible for making her own choices, her consent to be abused by him could no longer be considered valid.

If the legal precedents I've listed above can be used as precedent in this situation, I'd say you are wrong.

And as I do not know how they are handling this, or Prop's current state of mind, and as Prop is here, conversing intelligently, I would not support an accusation of abuse in this case.

quote:

daddysprop has been detailing this relationship for a couple of years now on this site. She has detailed a life where she has never known anything other than abuse. Abuse that has left her so broken that she is now incapable and incompetent. Do you think that the honorable thing to do is to take her and abuse her further? Is that what dominance is?

First, I'll point out how you failed to quote an important provision when you quoted me above.

Second, I'll point out the discrepancy between what you call "abuse" and what Prop has described.

I will point out that depression can lead to things like suicidal tendencies, requiring a guardian to ensure the individual does not do harm to him/herself.

Would this preclude a long-term cessation of bdsm activities? I don't believe so. The cause may have nothing to do with bdsm. BDSM might actually be therapeutic, acting as a safety valve for pressures that would otherwise erupt as self-destructive.

Seems to me there is not enough information for me to claim this situation is wrong.

For all I know, Daddy is Prop's life-line, and without him she'd curl up and die.

quote:

Now, take daddysprop and her Daddy out of the equation entirely. Do you think that we should send a message that we think that it's ok for competent people to abuse incompetent people under the guise of dominance? Would it be okay to do so to invalids? The mentally retarded? As you yourself said, how far down the ladder of insanity do we go before it's "not ok"?

Now you are opening that second can of worms I mentioned in the portion of my quote you left out.

It's one thing to ask this question in the presence of a "verifiable organic disorder affecting cognitive processes (ie a brain tumour)".

Quite another to ask whether someone with chronic depression which, under some conditions, can lead to suicidal tendencies should ever be a part of a bdsm relationship.

I have my doubts about the problem with objectivity in psychiatry, when dealing non-organic disorders. Psychiatry has a long history of getting it wrong.

For example, Masochism is not a psychiatric problem unless the masochist says it is a problem.

The short answer to your question is that it is too broad for a "yes" or "no" answer. There are -many- disorders and in each case it is up to the individual or guardian to decide what is best.

Just as you've pointed out that the state declared Prop incompetent (and have commented on the care with which they make such decisions) I must believe that the same is true for appointing a guardian.

Regardless of what you think of their relationship, the state, after careful consideration, appointed Daddy as Prop's guardian and Prop seems content with this decision.

Perhaps this is a good time to remind everyone of the value of a Living Will, so that whatever terms and conditions you want applied to you should you be deemed incompetent will have legal force behind it.

< Message edited by Bobkgin -- 9/19/2007 1:23:11 PM >

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 306

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 2:51:19 PM

submittous

Posts: 345
Joined: 6/12/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

prop, again I will say that it's not about you and him. It's about not being willing to say "it's ok for Master's/Dominants to take individuals who are incapable of consent (mentally incompetent) and abuse them at will under the umbrella of this lifestyle.

I'd bet that when prop was discharged and released from her hospitalization she recieved paperwork that essentially certifies that she was then mentally competent, otherwise whe would not have been released. What sort of verification do you have that you are competent? If you are like most of us, none until and unless you have been committed and discharged, which by your standards would make you incompetent.

I once worked for a man who had been hospitalized for depression and he took great pride in lambasting the rest of us because he was "the only muthafucka in this place that can prove he is sane". And he was.

I think you jump to conclusions when you assume someone hospitalized at some point in their lives is forever viewable as mentally incompetent.

I do agree with your premise that consent is only valid when the person giving it is capable of doing so, but that is a complex situation to understand. I also totally agree with props concerns about demonization of relationship systems in bdsm by individuals who usually don't or can't understand the realities of the judged relationships. I've been involved in bdsm for a long time and the vast majority of horror stories I have heard about and later investigated turned out to be more hype than problem.... Once the real situations were understood and the real people talked to the real story came out and the more rational and legitimate their situation turned out to be.

Over reacting and running screaming "OMG he is gonna kill you and feed your ears to the dogs" seems to most often be the tactic of people who have looked at something they didn't understand and not the reaction of experienced accepting bdsm people who see a situation that is truly dangerous. The few times I have run accross really dangerous situations in bdsm the solutions have always been easy to see and execute and never required histrionics.

I think this thread has a lot of reaction from people who see something that for whatever reason they don't understand and that scares them and when they demonize others bdsm relationships it hurts us all and spreads the paranoia that what we do is wrong, dangerous or somehow evil.

Let's all take a deep breath and realize that none of us has all the answers, in fact we are only looking for the answers that work for ourselves.... seldom or maybe never are those answers universal and applicable to everyone in bdsm.

Bill

_____________________________

"If you are lucky enough to find a way of life you love, you have to find the courage to live it." John Irving

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 307

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 3:14:25 PM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

It would also be nice if you logged off your computer and actually had some contact with the actual public scene.

Why Rabbit, did you know that keeping tabs on what another person is doing to the extent that you can say he never logs off is a symptom of a stalker?

"observing a person's actions closely for an extended period of time"

"Stalkers will often denigrate their victims which reduces the victims to objects. This allows stalkers to feel angry at victims without experiencing empathy, or they may feel that they are entitled to behave as they please toward the victims. Viewing victims as "lesser," "weak" or otherwise seriously flawed can support delusions that the victims needs to be rescued, or punished, by the stalkers. Stalkers may slander or defame the character of their victims which may isolate the victims and give the stalkers more control or a feeling of power."

"Predatory stalker: spy on the victim in order to prepare and plan an attack ..."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stalking

Of course, it might surprise you to know that being logged on and being physically present at the computer are not necessarily the same thing.

While logged on yesterday, I worked on replacing the property gate, fed the dogs and spent some time throwing sticks for them, baked a loaf of bread and had an afternoon nap.

I can only guess you spent all day staring at the little green "online" message that appears here when I am logged in. How else could you claim I didn't log off?

Being obsessed with getting your victim is another sign of a stalker, Rabbit.

I suppose this is a good time to remind folks:

"The anger of a serial bully is especially apparent when they come across someone who can see through them to espy the weak, inadequate, immature, dysfunctional aggressive individual behind the mask."

"The objectives of bullies are Power, Control, Domination, Subjugation. They get a kick out of seeing you react. It doesn't matter how you react, the fact they've successful provoked a reaction is, to the bully, a sign that their attempt at control have been successful. After that, it's a question of wearing you down. The more your try to explain, negotiate, conciliate, etc the more gratification they obtain from your increasingly desperate attempts to communicate with them. Understand that it is not possible to communicate in a mature adult manner with a disordered individual who's emotionally retarded."

http://www.bullyonline.org/related/cyber.htm

As usual, rather than reply to any of my arguments, you went straight to the part that wounded your ego and lashed out like a kid. As I said, its really cute to watch you puff and prance.

As I said before, I will continue to speak up and against someone who is spreading misinformation under the guise of claiming to be an "experienced expert" as you have. I will continue to disagree with your silly viewpoints as they appear.

You can try and spin it all you want and result to silly conjectures and insulting my age, but all it does it prove that you have really nothing to counter my logic with and demonstrates your complete lack of character

I dont keep tabs on you, Bob. I just read your posts and your viewpoints remind constantly of my own about a year and a half ago when I was completely new to M/S and BDSM and was caught up in my own miconceptions and fantasies.

Feel free at any point to list the BDSM organizations you have been involved with in the past that can be established credentials that qualify you as "the expert here to teach" as you constantly posture yourself to be.

I can gladly provide the organizations and clubs I have been involved with along with homepages to offer proof of their existance and references.

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to Bobkgin)

Post #: 308

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 3:19:29 PM

Lumus

Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline

I always thought being stalked would be kinda romantic...

*finds a copy of "Every Breath You Take" and cranks the volume*

No one ever stalks me.

_____________________________

<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

(in reply to MadRabbit)

Post #: 309

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 3:36:58 PM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

Fast Reply to No One In Particular :

Minus the 6 pages of Bob climbing up on his soapbox and putting words in other people's mouths, I would say about 8 pages of this 10 pages is people mostly talking over each other.

In my opinion, having a relationship where the slave is not allowed to set limits with the Master or where the slave has adopted a mentality of "no limits" is not the same thing as "no limits" in the literal and absolute sense.

This is one of the things that is part of my own dynamic and the dynamics of my friends, but if anyone were to tell any of us that having that kind of relationship means that a Master wields power that comes with complete lack of restrictions or is unrestricted in what he can demand from his slave in an absolute sense, that would be laughable.

Anyone trying to tell me that as an Owner, I did not have to be aware and respect boundaries because my slave could not say "No" is laughable.

Having a relationship that is "no limits" that functions within the scope of the Master's limits and guidelines isnt the same thing as "no limits" in the scope of the absolute..

Nor does me never asking anything of my slave that would require her to say "No" translate to "She will never say no" in an absolute sense.

Thats the only distinction I have been trying to make.

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to Lumus)

Post #: 310

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 3:37:42 PM

Bobkgin

Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

Feel free at any point to list the BDSM organizations you have been involved with in the past ...

lol

Feel free at any point to list the 10+ year relationships you have been involved with in the past, Rabbit. You know, the ones where you married your slave, gave birth to a child, raised the child, stood by your slave while she fought cancer and lost?

Some of us are a bit too busy living real-life to be screwing around with BDSM 'organizations'.

Oh yes, about your 'arguments'.

If there is anyone stupid enough to swallow them, you're welcome to them.

< Message edited by Bobkgin -- 9/19/2007 3:41:07 PM >

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to MadRabbit)

Post #: 311

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 3:40:23 PM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

Feel free at any point to list the BDSM organizations you have been involved with in the past ...

lol

Feel free at any point to list the 10+ year relationships you have been involved with in the past, Rabbit. You know, the ones where you married your slave, gave birth to a child, raised the child, stood by your slave while she fought cancer and lost?

Some of us are a bit too busy living real-life to be screwing around with BDSM 'organizations'.

I could list plenty if I made them up.

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to Bobkgin)

Post #: 312

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 3:41:34 PM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

wow Bob...you gave birth....seriously...i still stand by the past few things i've said to you...stop using us to get thru your grief over your wife...its normal, its healthy...but this is not the appropriate place to do it...turn off the computer Bob...

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to Bobkgin)

Post #: 313

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 3:43:43 PM

Bobkgin

Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

Feel free at any point to list the BDSM organizations you have been involved with in the past ...

lol

Feel free at any point to list the 10+ year relationships you have been involved with in the past, Rabbit. You know, the ones where you married your slave, gave birth to a child, raised the child, stood by your slave while she fought cancer and lost?

Some of us are a bit too busy living real-life to be screwing around with BDSM 'organizations'.

I could list plenty if I made them up.

Why does that not surprise me?

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to MadRabbit)

Post #: 314

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 3:44:54 PM

umisprite

Posts: 132
Joined: 6/16/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lumus
I always thought being stalked would be kinda romantic...
*finds a copy of "Every Breath You Take" and cranks the volume*
No one ever stalks me.

Being stalked is not all it's cracked up to be. If it had been Sting, however, I might be singing a different tune.

_____________________________

My mistakes are neither pretty nor little.

(in reply to Lumus)

Post #: 315

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 3:49:46 PM

Bobkgin

Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty

wow Bob...you gave birth....

It was a team effort.

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 316

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 4:02:39 PM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

Feel free at any point to list the BDSM organizations you have been involved with in the past ...

lol

Feel free at any point to list the 10+ year relationships you have been involved with in the past, Rabbit. You know, the ones where you married your slave, gave birth to a child, raised the child, stood by your slave while she fought cancer and lost?

Some of us are a bit too busy living real-life to be screwing around with BDSM 'organizations'.

I could list plenty if I made them up.

Why does that not surprise me?

Yes, Bob, unfortanely I am above making up stories regarding wives and children to add false creditability to my experience with M/S and use them as a way to be a junky for sympathy.

As usual, Bob, attempt at countering your arguments or trying to establish some kind of background to the expertise you so arrogantly claim to have has resulted in you acting like a child.

So I see no point in continueing this discourse.

If at any point you would like to debate any of the very logical and realistic points I have brought up, I will gladly respond. I dont consider myself to be above explanation or correction like you do.

Just try to avoid the "Pffft....your just stupid arguments" out of it. Its not the best debate tactic

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to Bobkgin)

Post #: 317

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 4:09:46 PM

susie

Posts: 1699
Joined: 11/21/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: submittous

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

prop, again I will say that it's not about you and him. It's about not being willing to say "it's ok for Master's/Dominants to take individuals who are incapable of consent (mentally incompetent) and abuse them at will under the umbrella of this lifestyle.

I'd bet that when prop was discharged and released from her hospitalization she recieved paperwork that essentially certifies that she was then mentally competent, otherwise whe would not have been released. What sort of verification do you have that you are competent? If you are like most of us, none until and unless you have been committed and discharged, which by your standards would make you incompetent.

I once worked for a man who had been hospitalized for depression and he took great pride in lambasting the rest of us because he was "the only muthafucka in this place that can prove he is sane". And he was.

I think you jump to conclusions when you assume someone hospitalized at some point in their lives is forever viewable as mentally incompetent.

I do agree with your premise that consent is only valid when the person giving it is capable of doing so, but that is a complex situation to understand. I also totally agree with props concerns about demonization of relationship systems in bdsm by individuals who usually don't or can't understand the realities of the judged relationships. I've been involved in bdsm for a long time and the vast majority of horror stories I have heard about and later investigated turned out to be more hype than problem.... Once the real situations were understood and the real people talked to the real story came out and the more rational and legitimate their situation turned out to be.

Over reacting and running screaming "OMG he is gonna kill you and feed your ears to the dogs" seems to most often be the tactic of people who have looked at something they didn't understand and not the reaction of experienced accepting bdsm people who see a situation that is truly dangerous. The few times I have run accross really dangerous situations in bdsm the solutions have always been easy to see and execute and never required histrionics.

I think this thread has a lot of reaction from people who see something that for whatever reason they don't understand and that scares them and when they demonize others bdsm relationships it hurts us all and spreads the paranoia that what we do is wrong, dangerous or somehow evil.

Let's all take a deep breath and realize that none of us has all the answers, in fact we are only looking for the answers that work for ourselves.... seldom or maybe never are those answers universal and applicable to everyone in bdsm.

Bill

I think in this case what erin is talking about is someone who has by her own admission been legally declared incompetent and who has posted often about the abuse she suffers at the hands of her master. We (as in the majority of people on this site) always talk about the difference between WIIWD and abuse and yet in this case it is overlooked because the person involved says it is what she wants.

If someone came on to the boards and said "I have been declared incompetent but I am here looking for a sadistic Master. I don't mind if he abuses me, breaks my legs, lets his friends rape me or if he wants to kill me" then you and most every other person here would tell them to stay well away from that situation.

I personally don't see her relationship with her "Master" as something that should be openly encouraged as being within what we normally call the "lifestyle" and I don't view it as a healthy relationship at all. But that is my opinion.

(in reply to submittous)

Post #: 318

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 4:11:21 PM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: UR2Badored
How do you define "no limits"?
(I would appreciate opinions and views from anyone on this matter)

As being unable/unwilling to establish personal boundaries.

I'm going to use the 'death is a limit' argument here since that's so popular. First of all, I think it's rather silly to list something as a 'limit' that 'is' going to happen. How can death, truly, be a limit when we are going to die? I mean, most people say a hard limit is NEVER, EVER gonna happen. It shouldn't be pushed.. it shouldn't even be put into a realm where pushing it is an option. Death is, absolutely, postively, going to happen for ever single one of the 6+ billion people on the planet. And people that tell me that I'm mental because I have no limits? At least I'm a realist!

Maybe I'll go out tomorrow and get hit by a bus. Splat. Dead. That would suck. Maybe I'll get some fatal disease and waste away with tubes in my body in a hospital. End result, I'm dead. That'd suck, too. Maybe I'll die in my sleep.. that would suck too, because I'd like to be there to watch. Birth begins us and death ends us. What we make of the in-between is what it's all about.

I have zero desire to limit my experiences because someone else thinks they may be too extreme. If it's out there, I'd like to try it and I'd like to try it with the man whom I adore more than any other being in this world. Himself knows this about me. He knows that his wish is my command, so he's careful to keep me fenced so I don't go wandering along an edge and fall off. See, to me, that sounds kinda cool. Go to the edge and jump.. to fly before you fall, even for those few moments.

I have this in my profile - "What limits cannot be surpassed with courage, tenacity and desire." What is too extreme? Who determines what is or is not acceptable for 'me' to do if not.. well, me? The answer to that question is Himself. None other. Not those who claim to speak for the billions of people on the planet when most of us know the mearest handful of souls. What's not done? What can anyone think of that someone, somewhere isn't doing? Every 30 seconds, 2 per minute, every hour of every die someone is out there committing suicide. Death is not a limit for them. People cut off their limbs for the thrill of it, for insurance claims etc. People are people and people are capable of doing anything that people can imagine doing and yet, suddenly, put on some leather chaps and 'everybody' has limits? That's just.. damn, I don't even know.. rather preposterous if you ask me.. and, you did ask. :)

Okay, so maybe I'm a french fry short of a Happy Meal, but to be consumed, bite by bite, and ingested .. to become a part of the inner workings of Michael, to have 'me' run through his veins, nourishing his body.. just thinking about it gets me hot. So there you go, death, amputation, cannabalism all rolled into one, hot, incredible last scene. What a way to go! Much better than being hit by a bus.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to UR2Badored)

Post #: 319

RE: No Limits: How far would you go? - 9/19/2007 4:12:10 PM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

I think the point erin is making is valid. prop has stated several times that she cannot function in the world, her Daddy abuses her regularly, as an example, he rapes her anally, using her blood as lube to the point where she is unable to function and she has regular unprotected sex with others, not knowing if they are going to kill her or not (and yes that has been stated in one of her posts), all at his bidding and prop has said repeatedly that he has taken steps to ensure that she is not able to leave him. And, yes, in prop's own words, she was and may still be mentally incompetent. I, for one, don't see consent there. That may just be me.

I don't see erin as making a judgment either. She is simply using prop's past posts to make a point, that's all.

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 320

Page: << < prev 14 15 [16] 17 18 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: No Limits: How far would you go?

Page: << < prev 14 15 [16] 17 18 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.152