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RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 4:52:54 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:


Keep the discussions civil and mature, and do not insult the kinks, preferences, lifestyles, etc. of others.

Criticism - Please keep criticism to a minimum. While disagreement is okay inflammatory comments aka flaming, humiliating and belittling other users is not acceptable.
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the.dark.
(.tryingentlereminders.)


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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 4:54:07 AM   
kirii


Posts: 79
Status: offline
I play ONLY publicly. I do not engage in BDSM with boyfriends, lovers, etc. What’s more, those who I play with, I do NOT have sexual intercourse with. Is this a one true way? For me, absolutely. For other’s, probably not. As long as a person stay’s true to who and what they are, their way is the one true way. There is nothing negative about that at all.
You try to use Madrabbit’s words from the other post as an attempt to make yourself look better. As others have already said, it is very juvenile of you. You claim to be a man who is mature and intelligent; yet this post signifies one who is instead immature and insecure about his place in life.
I have read many of Madrabbits posts, and never have I seen him try to utilize a ‘one true way’; I have found that he goes out of his way to be open minded about others. On the other hand, your posts indicate that you are close minded and petty with those who do not agree 100% with what you say or believe in.
To tell the truth, you disappoint me with this post; and have only reaffirmed the beliefs and opinions that others have about you. You really should be feeling shame right now.
 

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 4:57:52 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		i suppose Daddy, SO and i are "clueless wannabes" because we prefer privacy instead of practicing in a public situation. 

we (and yes i'm speaking for both of my Doms since they do feel this way) don't need to "show off" as it were when it comes to "performing" in front of the "circus" crowd. 

for us, BDSM is kept behind closed bedroom doors since we view it as dessert after a wonderful 7-course dinner.

there's more to life than constant public display/sex on th brains for us.  so yes, we don't follow the "twue" public scene way and have no desire/interest in attending/viewing it either.

_____________________________

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...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 4:58:24 AM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

I have upon many occassions explained that I've particpated on bdsm boards for some 20 years (not counting the last ten or so).


Many people are not going to give you lots of points for participating on bdsm boards for 30 or so years.  It may be impressive to you, but it is still a fantasy life unless you take the big step and actually have a real-time relationship. 



It is a cuirous thing that in this crusade for the "One True Way" I am the only one who must prove I've had previous relationships.

In the 25+ years I've been living with BDSM, I've had a six-year relationship (the one where BDSM started), a four-year relationship, and the most recent one of over ten years. In the gaps were relationships that lasted between six and 18 months (not counting dating).

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 5:00:30 AM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

quote:


Keep the discussions civil and mature, and do not insult the kinks, preferences, lifestyles, etc. of others.

Criticism - Please keep criticism to a minimum. While disagreement is okay inflammatory comments aka flaming, humiliating and belittling other users is not acceptable.
CollarChat TOS


the.dark.
(.tryingentlereminders.)


 
We've all seen how often that gets enforced, Dark.

All it takes is a mod who sees "humiliation" as "truth" and no rule has been broken.
 


< Message edited by Bobkgin -- 10/12/2007 5:02:36 AM >

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 5:01:57 AM   
TNstepsout


Posts: 1558
Joined: 8/3/2005
Status: offline 		Bob, I have to say I'm disappointed that you would start an entire thread to "call out" another poster. If you really wanted to expand on this topic you could have done it in a way that called for discussion without attacking another poster. By quoting only a portion of what he said and adding your comments, we do not know the context in which that statement was made. We have only your interpretation.

This is unbecoming behavior.

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 5:09:42 AM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TNstepsout

Bob, I have to say I'm disappointed that you would start an entire thread to "call out" another poster. If you really wanted to expand on this topic you could have done it in a way that called for discussion without attacking another poster. By quoting only a portion of what he said and adding your comments, we do not know the context in which that statement was made. We have only your interpretation.

This is unbecoming behavior.


I've already provided a link to the thread in the OP, TN.

But this will, perhaps, be clearer:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1334729/mpage_15/key_/tm.htm

Post #294

As for discussion, there is plenty of room for discussion on this topic.

< Message edited by Bobkgin -- 10/12/2007 5:11:52 AM >

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to TNstepsout)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 5:18:31 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		/shrug

I read that entire post; as well as some of your others. Only one person has ever presented himself without honor and integrity and I am sorry to say bobby... but that person is you.

You come here attacking Madrabbit, Mercnbeth, KoM... all you do is make yourself look petty and small

You know, I have been OUT of the scene and relationships for ten years now by choice; and yet, if I was to come back today... I would follow the advice of others before yours. They speak with honesty; your words come off sounding pompous and malicious.

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If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 5:28:14 AM   
RRafe


Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline 		It's probably the one true way to prove you aren't just screwing around on a computer-making shit up. I can supply refferences that have seen me scening in public-can you?

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I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 5:49:29 AM   
gypsygrl


Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
Status: offline 		For me, 'the public scene' is a defining element of bd/sm.  I go to munches and play parties and when first talking to my Master, the fact that he was involved in our local scene was a real draw and that he knew some of the same people I knew gave me a lot of confidence in him.  The public scene is a connection to a wider community, a circle of friends, and a point of reference.  I'm about the most asocial person in the world, am terribly shy, could probably be diagnosed with some kind of social anxiety disorder and have even had panic attacks at play parties, but I place a high value on community so I keep going.  So, yeah, you could say that I see it as part of my "one true way." 



< Message edited by gypsygrl -- 10/12/2007 5:58:04 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 5:53:43 AM   
MsWorthy


Posts: 31
Joined: 9/28/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: spanklette
...
I So, I suppose my question would be instead of why go...why not?


I have never attended a munch, play party, or any type of bdsm event.

Why not?

1) I have no interest in putting my private life on display for the public. That includes just acknowledging by my presence that I have a common interest. It isn't anyone's business what I do - in general - with my partners, much less what I do - sexually - with my partners.

2) I have a minor child. My child's father has already attempted to take her from me, and that was (supposedly) because I am lesbian (he had other reasons of course, one of which was an attempt to force me back into a relationship with him). How much more ammunition would he have if he knew I was also a dominant and a sexual sadist.

3) I am simply not a very social person. I have no interest in joining crowds of people for any activity. Very small groups or one-on-one communication with people that I know and trust is what I enjoy.

(in reply to spanklette)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 5:59:23 AM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline 		Gypsygirl, MsWorthy:

Thank you for your contributions.


_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to MsWorthy)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 6:02:07 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin
quote:


well.... I am not so sure I can pity him... but it just might deserve to the pity.  I do see someone that does have some pretty good intellectul capacity... however... it is lost in the torment of his emotions, prejudicial beliefs and finally closemindedness. 

I can't imagine someone living with him having such angst... it is those that I would pity


And would you be so kind as to tell us when and where you studied psychiatry? When you received your diploma to practice psychiatry? And who taught you that psychiatry could be practiced over the internet?

We wouldn't want to think this was just spin on your part, now would we?




Clearly I have touched a nerve......

as far as just spin.... I couldn't care less if people think it is spin or not.  So I will step out of the We part.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 6:09:36 AM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin
quote:


well.... I am not so sure I can pity him... but it just might deserve to the pity.  I do see someone that does have some pretty good intellectul capacity... however... it is lost in the torment of his emotions, prejudicial beliefs and finally closemindedness. 

I can't imagine someone living with him having such angst... it is those that I would pity


And would you be so kind as to tell us when and where you studied psychiatry? When you received your diploma to practice psychiatry? And who taught you that psychiatry could be practiced over the internet?

We wouldn't want to think this was just spin on your part, now would we?




Clearly I have touched a nerve......


Clearly in this age of closer scrutiny such questions should be expected when one makes such pronouncements.

quote:


as far as just spin.... I couldn't care less if people think it is spin or not.  So I will step out of the We part.


Clearly I have touched a nerve......

< Message edited by Bobkgin -- 10/12/2007 6:10:36 AM >

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 6:19:06 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin


Clearly I have touched a nerve......


YUP.... Whenever the Word "We" is used that would include you and I... I would be touchy... I have absolutely no respect for you.  Being included in any group with you is more than I could take or want to endure.  It is my opinion that you are prefect example of the very person that submissives should avoid.   People get all up in arms of abusers and predators.... but individuals like yourself are much more common and cause alot more pain to others.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 6:20:29 AM   
BeingChewsie


Posts: 1633
Joined: 10/27/2005
Status: offline 		I have never had anything to do with the pubic scene. We have always had plenty of space to play at home. It obviously wasn't required for us to meet each other or form a relationship. I don't think I have ever seen anyone suggest it is a requirement. I'm not all that interested in hanging out with/having dinner with people based on how we like to fuck as the common denominator.

_____________________________

"In fact, it is my contention that most women are accepting of way less than optimal circumstance constantly, and are lucky to be 'snagged' by the right man, if ever. But it is more by happy accident than by their design. "
~Ron and Hup

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 6:21:41 AM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline 		It's interesting, Bob-O, that you are sidestepping the posts that have clearly called you out on the fact that you're twisting the words you've quoted from Mad Rabbit. MR was clearly talking about you not being part of a community, not about you playing sex games in front of others. By adding the suffix (ing) you change the entire meaning of the word. The pettiness of this entire thread truely is a shame since you clearly have the intelligence for better.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 6:24:54 AM   
Alumbrado


Posts: 5560
Status: offline 		Stepping past the trollage in the OP, and addressing the underlying question, does anyone here doubt that scening in public is in many ways, an entirely different experience than what people do in the privacy of their bedrooms?

Then I'm having a hard time coming up with a reason for dismissing 'new and different' as 'inferior'... at least not from anyone who wants to learn more than they already know.

Of course for those who already know everything they are ever going to learn...

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 6:26:06 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		I have met people in the lifestyle and attended munches.  I can safely say that I will probably never attend another munch, just not my thing as I found some of the behavior tacky, considering it was in a public place (restaurant).  I have had the most fun meeting other subs for dinner or going to bbq's with other members of the lifestyle.  We talked about the lifestyle some but it was mainly just fun and visiting with each other.....just like <gasp> regular people!  

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Is Public Scening the "One True Way"? - 10/12/2007 6:29:22 AM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44

It's interesting, Bob-O, that you are sidestepping the posts that have clearly called you out on the fact that you're twisting the words you've quoted from Mad Rabbit.


http://www.collarchat.com/m_1334729/mpage_16/key_/tm.htm

Post #305


_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)
Profile   Post #: 40
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