RE: Ok. This might just be the limit.

RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (Full Version)

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kitttty -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 9:14:24 AM)
quote: After reading the OP's threads, I've come to the conclusion that I'd rather represent myself in court than ever having the OP as my lawyer in the future. So lets hope the Master makes me have his babies and stay home so that those seeking representation against injustice do not end up with me... Not to worry though, there are reasons I wont be doing trial law. Obvious reasons.

RosesHaveThorns -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 9:18:58 AM)
Why is he trying to get you to go into law if you could get screwed if these pictures resurface? He sounds very vindictive if he punishes someone for praticing good communication as well. So I don't believe that he wouldn't unscramble or revert to an older verison. Also think of your children, as praticing BDSM does not look good in court when it comes to custody cases.

kc692 -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 9:56:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kitttty quote: To me this post is about trust. Do you trust him to protect your identity online? Do you trust him not to do anything that will damage your reputation. Do you trust him enough to have a real no limits M/s relationship? If you trust him then there is no issue. Obviously there is an issue... It is about trust. He says that he has taken steps to protect my identity. He said that whatever he did is better than the swirl thing. I trust him completely not to deliberately do anything to ruin my reputation. But I don't 'trust' him enough to believe he is omnipotent and can prevent everyone on the internet from identifying a pic of me. Generally the 'no limits' thing works because there have just been no hard limits. There are lots of soft limits. I don't say 'time out. I dont want to do this anymore'. The Master asks if something makes me uncomfortable when it looks like it does and then he does not do it. There never is a give and take on these things- He just will not do what bothers me. Even now, he isn't doing what bothers me. I said the pictures bothered me and he took the site down in like 3 minutes. But he just isn't happy about it. He actually wanted things one way while I wanted them another way and now we just have this point of contention. He says that the issue is that I don't trust him. I am not sure if the issue is also that I am preventing him from having this pornographic blog. Right now the give and take seems to be that he does not get the blog the way he wants (which means he does not want it at all) and I get punishment. He has not told me what the punishment is but it seems that it is not a punishment designed to coerce me into changing my ways- it's just some pain and humilation. quote: shows that you have some fairy tale idea of marriage. And that is so much smarter than the fairy tale idea of the collar. Ive got the collar. Aint good enough. Commit to me enough to say that it will cost you half your life's savings to leave me and then I can give 100% trust. Its not an SM thing. I feel the same way with Vanilla relatinships. I feel paranoid when leaving is easy. Wow,..............so if you have the supposed security blanket of money to ease your life afterwards, its all good???????????Because maybe he will love the money more so stay with you no matter what? And you want half of his whole lifes savings, not even at best half of what he acquired while with you? You want to make sure you are able to make him pay "forever" , then it's all good??? WOW............

chellekitty -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 9:59:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kitttty quote: After reading the OP's threads, I've come to the conclusion that I'd rather represent myself in court than ever having the OP as my lawyer in the future. So lets hope the Master makes me have his babies and stay home so that those seeking representation against injustice do not end up with me... Not to worry though, there are reasons I wont be doing trial law. Obvious reasons. i really hope you don't ruin multiple children's lives because you need your feelings validated...please grow up before you reproduce...

kc692 -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:02:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kitttty quote: This sounds like what the gorian girls talk about. "I am a super duper owned slave who will do anything" but her cowering "master" wouldn't dare ask her to even pick up after herself or lose 125 pounds for fear of her "being uncomfortable" but I AM a SLAVE dammit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But the Master has gotten me to lose weight and do more strenuous tasks than picking up clothes. Honestly, I have no need to believe that I am owned so deeply that I will do anything. There are a lot of things I would not do. Generally these are not things the Master even requests. As of yet they have never been things the Master insists upon. quote: It shouldn't take the threat of losing half of your assets to be comitted to a partner. Well, it does. I can be very nice to a man that does not make a true investment in our future together but its not commitment. How can you let someone make major decisions for you if you are not sure he is going to be there to endure the consequences? For me, trust is intertwined with commitment. And commitment that is more than "I'll be there". And what do you offer him if you should decide to leave to show your commitment? I get the chances are slim, because you don't want to work, you want to sit at home and have his babies(and although I know that is a thankless job, somehow I get the feeling in advance you won't be stuck there cept when you want to be, since it all seems to be about you), but what do you have to offer him other than your word....do you have any savings to give to him, or am I right that you "know you would never do that"(wonder what his income range is just out of curiosity, cuz it got your attention) but how does he know?

kc692 -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:04:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LATEXBABY64 if someone is on their eight marriage I would say that is pretty big red flag on the how to stay commited . You been married more then three there are some issuses. and that paper that ever slams is not different in the meaning of a collar. I guess it just dose not mean a lot to people. So for use that do beleve is love happiness and all the good stuff you rock. For those that do not GET BENT . thats all i have to say about that I wish someone would get friggin spell check and a grammar lesson...it would make it so much easier to understand why we should get bent.

RosesHaveThorns -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:06:37 AM)
quote: Even now, he isn't doing what bothers me. I said the pictures bothered me and he took the site down in like 3 minutes. But he just isn't happy about it. He actually wanted things one way while I wanted them another way and now we just have this point of contention. He says that the issue is that I don't trust him. I am not sure if the issue is also that I am preventing him from having this pornographic blog. No two people want the same thing. Ever. Blaming you for having wants and needs that differs from his own is a tad silly. And he made you uncomfortable, and you asked for the pictures to be removed. And he's punishing you for not trusting him? You have a right to say when you are uncomfortable. And punishing you if you happen not to trust him isn't going to build trust, just really bad communication if you fail to mention anything ever again.

RosesHaveThorns -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:08:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kc692 quote: ORIGINAL: LATEXBABY64 if someone is on their eight marriage I would say that is pretty big red flag on the how to stay commited . You been married more then three there are some issuses. and that paper that ever slams is not different in the meaning of a collar. I guess it just dose not mean a lot to people. So for use that do beleve is love happiness and all the good stuff you rock. For those that do not GET BENT . thats all i have to say about that I wish someone would get friggin spell check and a grammar lesson...it would make it so much easier to understand why we should get bent. I'm wondering why marriage = love, personally. Tax breaks are a sign of true love? Also, gays in the U.S. do not love each other because they can't legally get married over here? But they love each other in Canada.

kc692 -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:10:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kitttty quote: Personally if I thought my slave/sub didn't trust me with or without marriage than I honestly wouldn't want to be with her merely for her own sanitaty. Its a problem I have with the kink world- permanent commitment is valued slightly less than it is in the vanilla world. My goal in life is to get married and have babies. The Master said I should get a JD also. He says I will be happier once I am an attorney and that its a good fall back in case I need to be gainfully employed. I figure I should have a fall back too. I dont like relationships where my partner is not considering family and permanence. That was never a problem with my relationship- we're both the same way regarding this subject. I just dont feel that I see enough commitment to truly slough off all limits even when things bother me. I dont live with him, dont have the engagement ring... I dont know why level of commitment (which includes the length of time the relationsip is expected to last) shouldn't matter. It matters to me. Ding ding ding , we have a winner with that Freudian Slip.....your goal in life is to get married and have babies.....not marry him and have his babies.......now we see the true goal, marry any wallet you have a link attached to and then it doesnt matter. It doesnt matter if the parents of your children's friends later on find out, you have your gravy train. It doesnt matter if it causes them hardship, because you have your security. I'm through with this train wreck...at least you admit it.

laurell3 -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:14:03 AM)
I have sad news for you OP, there's no amount of money in the world that's going to make you happy until you do something for yourself and get a sense of self. Chelle's right, bringing children into this world given the obstacles you are facing and the way you chose to deal with them by not dealing with them at all would be a horrible injustice. Do yourself a favor, pull your head out of this ridiculous fantasy and get some help from someone you're not having sex with.

domiguy -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:27:09 AM)
All I know, is that after you two finally end your relationship.....I look forward to seeing all of your pics in Hustler's "Beaver Hunt." You sure can pick'em....The reason you should not be allowed to practice law is that you probably would put more of your clients behind bars then the best prosecutor could ever imagine....Your lack of judgment is astounding... Tell me when you two split....He will post your photos within the hour.

kitttty -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:31:26 AM)
quote: Ding ding ding , we have a winner with that Freudian Slip.....your goal in life is to get married and have babies.....not marry him and have his babies.......now we see the true goal, marry any wallet you have a link attached to and then it doesnt matter. It doesnt matter if the parents of your children's friends later on find out, you have your gravy train. It doesnt matter if it causes them hardship, because you have your security. Well, my goal in life was to get married and have babies now it is to get married to him and his babies. Why are you knocking my goal? There is nothing wrong with it. Actually there appears to be something wrong with you since you have decided that this is 'all about me'- Im not sure what that is supposed to mean being that well, this is my thread isn't it? Thus yes, the thread is about me. Would you have kids with someone you weren't married to? Generally, that's not something I aspire towards. There are a lot of things I would do if married and would not do if not. Like getting the Master's name tattooed on my ass- I think its hot but Im not going to do that now. The prospect of having my pics on a publizied blog and having my public reputation risked is also sexy but its impossible now as I might need my reputation in tact. Im not sure why people are blaming me for being a bad potential parent here. Nothing unethical has happened between us- its the vanilla's world potential judgment (unfair judgment) that is the problem. The pics dont represent unethical acts, the blog does not represent unethical ideas. It is what it is but do you realy think that if my children somehow found out that I was into kink that it would ruin them psychologically and turn them into messed up adults? If they find out, well they find out. Deal with it then. It's not inherantly that bad. It's not that I hate activities this 'extreme' in my eyes, it's just that I need more security in my relationship to enjoy them. There is some good advice on this thread and a lot of illogical cattiness.

xoxi -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:36:15 AM)
rolls my eyes You know, there are actually gasp some people in the world who believe marriage=forever. There are also some people who would rather be a stay at home mother/wife than have a career. For the whole lot of you to disrespect those people's lifestyle choices by saying, in effect, "you're dumb for wanting what you want, don't you realize people get divorced" is beyond uncalled for. 50% of marriages ending in divorce ALSO means that 50% of marriages end in death of one of the partners. You know, til death do you part and all. What sort of half ass statician would believe that 50/50 speaks in favor of divorce? Ugh if the OP had said she wants to be pimped out at a sex party you all would rush to defend her lifestyle choices. But god forbid she wants a permanent commitment from her partner. I guess that's just not kosher in 'alternative' lifestyles. [sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif]

kitttty -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:36:57 AM)
quote: I look forward to seeing all of your pics in Hustler's "Beaver Hunt." That's completely illegal, so it wont happen. quote: I'm wondering why marriage = love, personally. Tax breaks are a sign of true love? Also, gays in the U.S. do not love each other because they can't legally get married over here? But they love each other in Canada. They cant get married. But if they dont want to then that is something else. Not wanting your public selves connected and your assets/financial futures made one is most certainly a lack of commitment if not a lack of love.

xoxi -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:40:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kc692 Ding ding ding , we have a winner with that Freudian Slip.....your goal in life is to get married and have babies.....not marry him and have his babies.......now we see the true goal, marry any wallet you have a link attached to and then it doesnt matter. It doesnt matter if the parents of your children's friends later on find out, you have your gravy train. It doesnt matter if it causes them hardship, because you have your security. I'm through with this train wreck...at least you admit it. Oh piss the fuck off. I would bet 90% of the people on the goddamn PLANET say their life's dreams include "finding someone to fall in love with and share my life with" without mentioning a specific person by name. Apparantly the whole feminazi movement has made wanting marriage and children the new forbidden fruit. I wonder if I'll have to burn my bra just to make THAT be seen as a valid choice for women. Hopefully I can burn some of those hideous 80's style power suits and every issue of Cosmo that advocates one night stands instead. Cuz my lingerie is pretty.

RosesHaveThorns -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:43:11 AM)
The point that many people here are making is that money shouldn't be used as a sign of commitment, and that other aspects of the relationship are cause for worry. And given that she thinks that if she runs off with half of the money he owns he won't divorce her, it is not comforting that she wants to be supported for the rest of her life without getting a job. Money isn't a man-leash. And true, if the divorce rate is 50%, then many people do stay in marriage. But dismissing the possiblity of divorce is just plain silly. That's like saying that if you want a coin to be heads, and you have a 50% chance, you shouldn't count on it being tails. Even if the divorce rate was 30%, there is still a chance it will happen, and one that should be considered. The fact that he is punishing her for removing the pictures is not really proving that he won't use those against her in the future.

laurell3 -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:43:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: xoxi quote: ORIGINAL: kc692 Ding ding ding , we have a winner with that Freudian Slip.....your goal in life is to get married and have babies.....not marry him and have his babies.......now we see the true goal, marry any wallet you have a link attached to and then it doesnt matter. It doesnt matter if the parents of your children's friends later on find out, you have your gravy train. It doesnt matter if it causes them hardship, because you have your security. I'm through with this train wreck...at least you admit it. Oh piss the fuck off. I would bet 90% of the people on the goddamn PLANET say their life's dreams include "finding someone to fall in love with and share my life with" without mentioning a specific person by name. Apparantly the whole feminazi movement has made wanting marriage and children the new forbidden fruit. I wonder if I'll have to burn my bra just to make THAT be seen as a valid choice for women. Hopefully I can burn some of those hideous 80's style power suits and every issue of Cosmo that advocates one night stands instead. Cuz my lingerie is pretty. Did you actually read the post or her other about marriage? The reason she wants to be married is to take 50% of his stuff if and when the marriage fails. She also states that it doesn't matter how bad the relationship is as long as they get married...come on xoxi...you can't possibly stand behind that.

kitttty -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:53:44 AM)
quote: She also states that it doesn't matter how bad the relationship is as long as they get married...come on xoxi...you can't possibly stand behind that. Where did I say that? I believe what I said is that some acts that I would now consider bad would not be considered bad if we were married. Think of the vanilla people who wont have sex before marriage (there are some) - I am like that, except with me its that I wont do some acts I now consider extreme before I feel I have a stronger commitment. quote: The reason she wants to be married is to take 50% of his stuff if and when the marriage fails. But I dont want it to fail...ever. I believe he feels the same way and I want to marry him because he is good for me, brings out the best in me and I think he would make a good father in part because he has great parents himself (not that that is a neccesity).

kc692 -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 10:58:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: xoxi quote: ORIGINAL: kc692 Ding ding ding , we have a winner with that Freudian Slip.....your goal in life is to get married and have babies.....not marry him and have his babies.......now we see the true goal, marry any wallet you have a link attached to and then it doesnt matter. It doesnt matter if the parents of your children's friends later on find out, you have your gravy train. It doesnt matter if it causes them hardship, because you have your security. I'm through with this train wreck...at least you admit it. Oh piss the fuck off. I would bet 90% of the people on the goddamn PLANET say their life's dreams include "finding someone to fall in love with and share my life with" without mentioning a specific person by name. Apparantly the whole feminazi movement has made wanting marriage and children the new forbidden fruit. I wonder if I'll have to burn my bra just to make THAT be seen as a valid choice for women. Hopefully I can burn some of those hideous 80's style power suits and every issue of Cosmo that advocates one night stands instead. Cuz my lingerie is pretty. Joining the train wreck ONE more time.....I never said that it was unreasonable to want to be married, or not understandable, I am after all married myself. I did not however, say I wanted to marry him so that if he left me I would get half his shit......as the OP did....I did not say that after marriage it would not matter what my public rep was because I would have his wallet to fall back on, the OP did. I also did not say that although I cared now, I would not care after marriage because of the wallet, nor care if my children suffered publicly because their friends parents, found out, the children would just have to get over it....the OP did. Did you read the rest of the thread, at least the ones where the OP posted? You are free to believe what you want, as am I. If you agree with the poster, more power to you. I do not for one minute, BASED ON EVERYTHING ELSE THE OP said, including she hoped to sit at home and have his babies. or did you miss the sit at home part in an earlier post? Although it is admirable to want that, most cannot sit at home...but again, since this is about the money should he leave, I'm betting that's a big plus. She said he was the one that worried about her having something to fall back on, and wanted her to get her degree. That leads to a POSSIBLE conclusion she doesnt ever want to work again. Again, that is between them, but bring it here, and one will get honest responses. I hope you have a better day, as I surely told no one "to piss the fuck off". Seems someone pissed in your wheaties, I promise it wasn't me. Now I'm through. Before I go, would you like me to get you some fresh wheaties?

xoxi -> RE: Ok. This might just be the limit. (10/27/2007 11:02:45 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 Did you actually read the post or her other about marriage? The reason she wants to be married is to take 50% of his stuff if and when the marriage fails. She also states that it doesn't matter how bad the relationship is as long as they get married...come on xoxi...you can't possibly stand behind that. I did read it. I just came away with a different impression. I saw it more as a general fear of abandonment, and that she is hesitant to lay her reputation and her future on the line until she feels that he is also making a significant investment. Call it 'jaded with men syndrome' - after all it's not his naked pics on the internet. She's willing to invest her reputation and future career opportunities if she knows he's investing something she considers equal. A very capitalist paradigm of relationships, but not one I inherently disagree with...namely because no matter how high the divorce rate is, I'm willing to bet the breakup rate of relationships before marriage is 1000 times higher. I also didn't read "no matter how bad the relationship is its OK if we're married" - I read it as saying "I'm willing to accept his judgement in certain areas if I'm confident he will catch me if I fall." She was saying that specifically about the OP - the idea of photos that could potentially destroy her career, and that if she were his housewife and a partner in HIS name she would be more likely to trust his judgement, rather than knowing she is still basically facing the world alone and he can dissappear at any moment, for any reason. I definitely think the OP has trust issues, and fear of abandonment. Those issues are her own. But the sheer vitriol of the posts criticizing her desire to be married makes me sick.

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