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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/13/2007 2:03:37 PM   
scottjk


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I just looked at my last couple of posts. I hate these editors. LOL

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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/13/2007 5:12:14 PM   
shyinini


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I cannot believe how mist and susie have taken my disagreement to a mass generalization and assume it means just the opposite ~~~ which would be another mass generalization  !!  
 
Neither over estimated generalizations are true.  Did ya even take time to read the article?   ANYONE can have a depressive personality.........
 
Sir's devoted property

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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/13/2007 10:47:17 PM   
susie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: shyinini

I cannot believe how mist and susie have taken my disagreement to a mass generalization and assume it means just the opposite ~~~ which would be another mass generalization  !!  
 
Neither over estimated generalizations are true.  Did ya even take time to read the article?   ANYONE can have a depressive personality.........
 
Sir's devoted property


Go back and read what mist said. She said depression is not part of the make up of natural submission. You disagree with that statement which means you think that it is.

Why do you think depression is part of the make up of natural submission?

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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/13/2007 11:44:55 PM   
erebus


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I've had a relationship with a crazy woman, who was quite attractive, quite intelligent, and quite 'borderline personality'.  She drove me nuts with the suicide attempts, the misuse of prescription drugs, the running away, the depression, etc. etc.

Life is too short to waste it on such a person.  Run the other way as fast as you can!

(in reply to shootingstar67)
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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/13/2007 11:53:23 PM   
shootingstar67


Posts: 195
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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

Why would you say you shouldn't post here? 


I think cause they are Gorean. But Gorens can post here.

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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/14/2007 10:12:46 AM   
laurell3


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quote:

ORIGINAL: scottjk

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

I hate to tell you this people, but most americans have some form of "mental illness" under the DSM.  A huge number of americans are estimated to suffer from untreated depression and according to a national  article (newsweek or one of the major news mags, reported a few studies, sorry I don't remember which) I read a few years ago, over 50% of the female population has been on some type of anti-depressant or mood stablizer for depression in the last decade.  Many mental illnesses are easily treatable and monitored. 

Good luck actually finding someone that's truly honest that doesn't have some form of mental illness or history of it.  I would suggest to you that those of you that would reject someone for merely having a "mental illness" aren't being all that honest with yourselves or don't understand how encompassing the term actually is.

In response to the OP's actual question, which isn't this ongoing conversation carried on here, if someone was truly self-destructive, I would have to look at why they were into d/s and/or bdsm.  If one truly desires to be treated badly ie: it really does feel bad for them to participate, I wouldn't want to be part of it personally.  However, to each their own.  I sure wouldn't discard a human being for depression unless it was severe enough they were a danger to themselves and didn't seek help.



Umm, half the female population? Allowing for the fact that most women see the doc more often than men, statistically, I'd still add an additional 25% to that. THEN, if all things being equal, most men are coping with untreated depression, or at least equally to women, that puts a total population of 225 people either being treated or not treated coping with depression. Folks, this is not an epidemic. It's catastrophic. Granted, personally, I'm coping with drepression ALL the time, but I see no need to treat a natural response to a considerable amount of stress. More often than not, depression is a natural response to conditions that cause stress, so why treat it? What's more, why are so many depressed? Usually it means that a basic need isn't being met. That many people can't possibly be depressed without an underlying fudemental issue. Perscribing drugs to treat depression is typically due to a chemical imbalance in the brain or body. So, are 'feel good drugs' being doled out because of some mass internal biological disorder? Corporate influence to boost profits?

Damn, this statistic is just astounding to put it lightly.

So many people so depressed and yet no one has identified a possible cause worth headlining news reports, government support or otherwise any general disemination of information? If these numbers were reported for something a virus or bacterial infection, the whole country would be turned upside down.

Just amazing. I bet I could write a book on this.


Sorry scott I wasn't trying to disregard men and I didn't do the study, just trying to point out that the numbers on simple depression alone without even considering any other mental illness are staggering.  I believe what you say is correct, the numbers are probably much higher.  I believe this study was based on the prescriptions of anti-depressents and self-reporting.  I'm sure self reporting of any mental illness isn't the best indicator of statistics.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to scottjk)
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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/14/2007 10:16:44 AM   
laurell3


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quote:

ORIGINAL: osocurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

Why would you say you shouldn't post here?
....erm.... because this section is titled "ask a Master" and I'm not ... also I'm really new here ... and suffering "new person" insecurities ...lol ...
*twitches*
and Thanks laurell3 ... I really do Love this topic!!

by the by I see that you’re correct about the “mental health” practitioners posting, so I want to add that I sincerely mean no disrespect to A/any one practicing mental health.
( side note …lol … why do we always refer to Doctors as “practicing” medicine … maybe that should be our first clue when referring to “diagnosis” )

My point being only that E/everyone is Mentally unique.
Who's to say who's balanced and who's not.
And I honestly believe that W/we each have our own mental health challenges.
( feck sake … who hasn’t suffered sever bouts of depression??
I’d worry more about the person walk'n 'round with a blank look and a constant smile  ... then someone who’s depressed )

A person’s life experiences colour the path they travel …
I would hope that a Dom or Master would have the mental balance (stability?? …erm strength?? ) and clarity of thinking … not to mention honor and integrity … to honestly judge whether He (or She) is in a “healthy” relationship with a sub or slave .
( …geeeeze … I can’t help laughing at my own words as I fantasize myself naked, collared cuffed, and chained … trembling as I kneel happily at the feet of a Strong Dominant Man … bearing the stripes, welts, and bruises .. recent evidence of our well balanced relationship.
*laughing my backside off*  )
As a sub … who sincerely desires rough sessions … am I mentally stable??
Are BDSM … D/s or M/s relationships the sign of  healthy mental stability for Any One???
... erm ….
I would certainly think it all depends on who Y/you ask … wouldn’t it??


You can post wherever you want, welcome to the forums, it's a zoo here at times, but it seems you are offerring some good points and I agree.  People all over have problems, those that claim "no baggage" or "issues" are the ones I laugh at.  Without insight there is no change.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to osocurious)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/14/2007 3:02:30 PM   
osocurious


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sincere thanks for the encouragement laurell3, it's appreciated.
*whispers*
so far I'm just having waaaay tooooo much fun ... and THAT'S the unexpected "icing on the cake" here in CollarMe

respectfully
~ curious ~ 

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/28/2007 8:03:34 PM   
Darkhaven80


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This is one of the trickiest questions. Mentally ill people shouldn't be shunned from the lifestyle, as physically handicapped people shouldn't, but the possibilities of things turning 'wrong' or destructive are higher. It's a hard area to advise on. I think it would depend - maybe - on the illness, and on the person on the other end, with their patience and intellect.

(in reply to hisannabelle)
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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/28/2007 10:57:14 PM   
deliciousmorsel


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Wow, you're almost as messed up as I am hisannabelle, and I think I'm just fine. Especially compared to some submissives I's seen. I have pretty much the same stuff but a lot more ortho repair and rehab.
I have to agree that for a natural submissive depression could be a big stumbling block. Not as a part of submission, but because there's no place in this culture for many types of people who have roles in other places. For me that applies not only to submission, a word and a lifestyle I found after many years of not fitting anywhere else, but to other skills and talents as well.
Now I'm mood disordered but extremely stable; I think it fascinating that schizophrenics in 3rd world countries with no drugs for them have a seventy percent chance of a positive to excellent out come versus about fifteen percent here. What can this tell us?

Anyway, depressives are very treatable and there's a good chance your doctor is one of us, too. Personality disorders- mixed with BDSM? Scary!

(in reply to hisannabelle)
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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/28/2007 11:15:19 PM   
DesertRat


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quote:

ORIGINAL: erebus
I've had a relationship with a crazy woman, who was quite attractive, quite intelligent, and quite 'borderline personality'.  She drove me nuts with the suicide attempts, the misuse of prescription drugs, the running away, the depression, etc. etc.

Life is too short to waste it on such a person.  Run the other way as fast as you can!


Amen.

_____________________________

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro--Hunter S. Thompson
It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide!--Chief Dead St. Knockout, 1933, Liverpool
Damn the crops. I'll only find peace at the end of a rope.--Winston Van Loo, 1911

(in reply to erebus)
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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/28/2007 11:24:55 PM   
Kalista07


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*i'm going to  try and type this without getting up on my soap box*
 
i guess i'm confused by the OP's question.....Who defines what a mental illness is? If it's listed in the DSM does that make it a mental illness.....If You see a psychiatrist is that a mental illness? If You take medication is that a menatl illness?  What if i take medication but it's perscribed by my primary MD? Cause guess what folks? i'm here to tell You that most all of us (yep!! i said it and i'll say it again) have met the diagnostic criteria to fit one or more diagnosable disorder in the DSM at one or more points in our lives.......
Regarding the two gentleman who commented on the "borderline woman", a phrase that has almost as much disdain and contempt in it as i can think of; i have a news flash for You....How would You feel if someone who 'seemingly' was "Normal" (whatever the hell that is) flipped out after You played with them?
It's funny.........Because as i read this i was asking myself if i have a mental disorder and frankly i don't know......Have i met diagnostic criteria for a few things in the past? You betcha!!! Are they currently impacting my ability to live life or my quality of life? Nope...Not at all....
*Edited because i re-read the OP's question and it doesn't use the term mental illness, it speaks of someone who's depressed or self destructive with low self regard* Hmmm...Have You ever played with someone who uses too much caffine? Alcohol? Smokes? Eats too many carbs or sugars? Spends to much money? Drives to fast? Is late with their mortgage payment? Doesn't always use birth control? "Self destructive" can be soooo inclusive..

backing away from the computer slowly,
Kali


< Message edited by Kalista07 -- 11/28/2007 11:29:54 PM >


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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/29/2007 2:05:41 AM   
shootingstar67


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The OP has schizophrenia. So if she wanted to mention mental illness she could have.

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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/29/2007 2:43:56 AM   
MissMagnolia


Posts: 3636
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Lets not forget, many people have mental illnesses, but few are "ill" most of the time. They can become unwell, or have an episode, occasionally, sometimes or hardly ever.

Those who do suffer from mental illness can live normal, productive lives. Of course some have relapses. Life stressors alone can cause relapse. But if people take their meds, get enough sleep, try hard to avoid those situations that stress them out, their relapse incidence drops significantly.

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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/29/2007 6:34:44 AM   
Machts


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I'm really not strong enough emotionally to deal with someone mentally ill. I'm a wimp that way. I have to be with someone healthy to be healthy myself.

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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/29/2007 10:14:28 AM   
MistressDolly


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quote:

ORIGINAL: shootingstar67

Have you ever run across a submissive who was obviously depressed or self destructive with low self regard? If so what did you do?

Have you ever been tempted to play with someone willing and attractive but obviously not very strong mentally or emotionally?


No, too much drama....

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m y s p a c e


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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/29/2007 12:21:32 PM   
LadyHibiscus


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I have my own illness to deal with, I am not able to cope with someone else who comes to me already messed up.  It's not as if someone I was already committed to became ill, that would be another story.  I wouldn't abandon a sick partner.

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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/29/2007 12:33:08 PM   
DesFIP


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Of course, we are only talking about people who have been diagnosed with mood or personality disorders here. If you compare a diagnosed person, on medication, with appropriate support systems in place to someone who claims they are normal but actually would be classified if they sought help, the better choice for a partner would be the one in treatment.

Just because someone says they're healthy doesn't mean they are. Sometimes it just means they refuse to recognize the problems in their life.

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RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/29/2007 4:01:11 PM   
laurell3


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Of course, we are only talking about people who have been diagnosed with mood or personality disorders here. If you compare a diagnosed person, on medication, with appropriate support systems in place to someone who claims they are normal but actually would be classified if they sought help, the better choice for a partner would be the one in treatment.

Just because someone says they're healthy doesn't mean they are. Sometimes it just means they refuse to recognize the problems in their life.


Amen.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Mentally Ill submissive - 11/30/2007 10:00:11 PM   
erebus


Posts: 169
Joined: 1/15/2004
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quote:


I think most of us can agree, that we ALL have some sort of mental "disorders", or maybe
even mental "illness".



Obviously, I disagree.  Most people have difficulties and troubles and sadness in life, but they are not mentally ill. 

There is a psychologist/psychiatrist industry in this country which seeks to identify normal behavior as an illness.  Look at the amount of Ritalin which is poured down the mouths of young boys to force them to conform to an artificial situation (the classroom).  Most learning is done outside of the classroom.  You have boys who are meant to be outdoors, studying bugs, building things, exploring, and so on.  And we force them to conform to that environment that tries to force them into little robotic units.

Just say no!

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 80
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