Do You Need to Love Your Dominant?

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Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 9:54:27 AM

Blaakmaan

Posts: 374
Joined: 5/21/2007
Status: offline

Greetings to all:

My question is pretty simple, I think.

I believe that interpersonal relationships are fueled by love, or at least by great affection.

My question to submissives is, do you have to, or even want to, love your Dominant?

Does it make it easier to serve him/her and to want to make him/her happy, or does it complicate things more than it's worth, or is it just not relevant at all?

Thanks to all who reply, and Happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

Post #: 1

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 9:55:43 AM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

My question to submissives is, do you have to, or even want to, love your Dominant?

No; I don't have to
No, I don't want to

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Post #: 2

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 10:02:14 AM

breatheasone

Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline

For me...yes I would have to...i guess it makes it easier...and yes I want to make Him happy.

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(in reply to Blaakmaan)

Post #: 3

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 10:08:05 AM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

Well, yes, I would like to be in love with someone I am in a D/s relationship with, that would be ideal, but do I have to?

No, it can still work, just not as perfectly.

(in reply to breatheasone)

Post #: 4

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 10:28:30 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

Hello Blaakman

Do I have to or want to? For me in a LTR, yes - but I don't believe everyone has to.
I don't believe it makes it easier or harder. Love simply 'is'.
It is relevant, but I don't believe it has to be and it can have absolutely nothing to do with my service or BDSM in general.

the.dark.

_____________________________

RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to Blaakmaan)

Post #: 5

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 10:32:34 AM

boy46

Posts: 48
Joined: 7/1/2007
Status: offline

Yes i need it. No doubt of it. But love towards your owner is made with time.

(in reply to RCdc)

Post #: 6

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 10:52:24 AM

julietsierra

Posts: 1841
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

Do I "have" to? Probably not
Do I "want" to? I wasn't sure at first (all that "protect yourself from the unknown" stuff going on back then)
Do I now? Absolutely
Would I change a thing? Never.

As far as whether loving him makes it easier to serve or not... well, it makes it more passionate. However, sometimes, it makes serving harder - and that's a good thing too.

juliet

< Message edited by julietsierra -- 11/22/2007 10:54:58 AM >

(in reply to boy46)

Post #: 7

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 11:04:46 AM

Hergirl0824

Posts: 119
Joined: 10/2/2007
Status: offline

for me personally yes it is a requirement, i do not function completely without loving

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(in reply to Blaakmaan)

Post #: 8

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 11:13:53 AM

akisha

Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline

To just submit and play with someone no. I have to have a general liking for the person and respect.

To be in a commited relationship with them and be owned by them? Yes

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Post #: 9

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 11:21:44 AM

esmerelda

Posts: 8
Joined: 11/16/2007
Status: offline

I don't think i could be truly owned by someone i don't love and respect......

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Post #: 10

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 11:27:42 AM

lanie38

Posts: 120
Joined: 9/14/2007
Status: offline

Don't have to or need to...it usually really complicates things...

~lanie

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Post #: 11

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 11:31:41 AM

southernhart

Posts: 120
Joined: 9/27/2007
Status: offline

i love my Owner, that's what makes D/s so special to me and takes me to unbelieveable heights and highs. Everything i do i do because of my love for him. i can't see myself just playing with someone and enjoying it without special feelimgs for them. It woul;d be empty and unsatisfying. This completes me. Happy Thanksgiving.

_____________________________

i am the proud property of Johnr. i belong to him and only to him. i love, treasure and worship him. i submit freely to him every day of my life.

(in reply to esmerelda)

Post #: 12

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 11:37:42 AM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blaakmaan

Greetings to all:

My question is pretty simple, I think.

I believe that interpersonal relationships are fueled by love, or at least by great affection.

My question to submissives is, do you have to, or even want to, love your Dominant?

Does it make it easier to serve him/her and to want to make him/her happy, or does it complicate things more than it's worth, or is it just not relevant at all?

Thanks to all who reply, and Happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

I haven't ever thought about *having to* or *wanting to*.

I probably wouldn't be with him after all this time if there wasn't mutual affection. We most certainly like each other, a lot.

I don't *want to make him happy* and I don't particulary want to serve , either, so they aren't relevant, in terms of affection etc.

agirl

(in reply to Blaakmaan)

Post #: 13

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 11:50:01 AM

rubberpet

Posts: 1743
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: The Land of Voodoo
Status: offline

For me, my submission is dependent on whether I'm in love with my domme. I can submit to a certain extent if my heart is not involved, but the level I reach will never be anywhere close to the level if I am in love with her. For it to be completely fulfilling, I need love from my mistress. She gives me all the love I could ever hope for, so that helps me to completely immerse myself in submission to Her. That is when I am at my happiest.

_____________________________

Collared and devoted property of Mistress Lorelei (vampchick88) as of 3/26/08.

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(in reply to agirl)

Post #: 14

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 12:22:13 PM

justnewsub

Posts: 127
Joined: 9/18/2007
Status: offline

Do i have to? i don't feel i have to love to serve, but definatly respect and trust... i agree that the stronger the feelings of affection the deeper i could submit...

Do i want to? yes i would some day love to be in a loving relationship with a Dom and hope to build up to that some day.

Also no matter what i do, i want to make my Dom happy, there is nothing like getting that pat on the head or a "good girl", for a job well done :)

(in reply to rubberpet)

Post #: 15

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 12:26:51 PM

Slavor

Posts: 15
Joined: 11/8/2007
Status: offline

I can love woman who like BDSM , but without influence on my personal life , I mean only at night with this or other free time at home with her .

(in reply to rubberpet)

Post #: 16

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 1:09:46 PM

winterlight

Posts: 1319
Joined: 2/18/2006
Status: offline

I wouldn't want to be in a relationship where there isn't love, commitment, and mutual respect and admiration for each other.

(in reply to Slavor)

Post #: 17

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 1:11:08 PM

Shawn1066

Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline

Do I have to? Yes.

Do I want to? Of course.

Do I? More and more every day. :-)

(in reply to Slavor)

Post #: 18

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 2:00:15 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

Do I have to? No. At the same time, I don't want a relationship where love will not be accepted or is limited. Do I want to? Yes.

I think often times we put so much faith in the words "I love you" that we forget that many things people do are loving, caring and desired. That is what I seek, not the words per se.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to Blaakmaan)

Post #: 19

RE: Do You Need to Love Your Dominant? - 11/22/2007 2:06:00 PM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

Do I have to? No. At the same time, I don't want a relationship where love will not be accepted or is limited. Do I want to? Yes.

I think often times we put so much faith in the words "I love you" that we forget that many things people do are loving, caring and desired. That is what I seek, not the words per se.

Love isn't just about words, or sappy romance.

It's about how you live.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to laurell3)

Post #: 20

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