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RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 5:58:50 AM   
Carmeldelight


Posts: 139
Joined: 4/22/2005
Status: offline 		Our problems lyes with him be erectile dysfunctional. I understand how he feels because last year I had found a lump in my breast. All I could think about was losing my breast,so I am trying to work this matter out.

(in reply to venusinblu)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 6:17:29 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		~fast reply~

my fiance has ED (due to medical problems/surgeries/medications) and has been dealing with it for the last 7 years. he went through a period like yours is going through now.  it took him a long time through therapy and family support to get back where he can function normally around others without having the rage,etc,

i can see this relationship getting worse than better each time his cock doesn't stay for more than a minute ....or second or not at all.  he needs to see doctor and psychiatrist to handle this. if it was me - i wouldn't be sticking around until he puts me in the hospital or the morgue. you have to think about your health and safety too if you're planning to stay in this relationship. you have to seriously think is it worth being blamed for his ED or being humiliated in front of his friends.

if this is the type of relationship you wished to have, then stay. if not, leave however you're the only one who can decide what is right for yourself.  


_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to venusinblu)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 6:21:46 AM   
venusinblu


Posts: 165
Joined: 1/12/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sambamanslilgirl

~fast reply~

my fiance has ED (due to medical problems/surgeries/medications) and has been dealing with it for the last 7 years. he went through a period like yours is going through now.  it took him a long time through therapy and family support to get back where he can function normally around others without having the rage,etc,

i can see this relationship getting worse than better each time his cock doesn't stay for more than a minute ....or second or not at all.  he needs to see doctor and psychiatrist to handle this. if it was me - i wouldn't be sticking around until he puts me in the hospital or the morgue. you have to think about your health and safety too if you're planning to stay in this relationship. you have to seriously think is it worth being blamed for his ED or being humiliated in front of his friends.

if this is the type of relationship you wished to have, then stay. if not, leave however you're the only one who can decide what is right for yourself.  



I feel this is excellent advice ..

< Message edited by venusinblu -- 1/31/2008 6:22:04 AM >

_____________________________

Louis: Do you think I would let them harm you?
Claudia: No you would not Louis. Danger holds you to me.
Louis: Love holds you to me.

~~~~~~

When the going gets tough, the tough get under the table . ... Edmund Blackadder

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 6:55:01 AM   
Carmeldelight


Posts: 139
Joined: 4/22/2005
Status: offline 		The adive you have given was very healthy, but how does one get him to see and admit that the pensi is not working because of his medical conditions. I am the only person who knows and I am trying to be supportive to him. But he feels it is me and not him. 

(in reply to venusinblu)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 7:09:04 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

The adive you have given was very healthy, but how does one get him to see and admit that the pensi is not working because of his medical conditions. I am the only person who knows and I am trying to be supportive to him. But he feels it is me and not him. 


If he doesn't know that diabetes causes ED then he hasn't been watching enough TV.

Seriously-- there is so much information about ED out there now that I can't imagine a grown man not having any clue as to his condition and your gentleman is under the care and supervision of a doctor which means he has access to more information.



_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to Carmeldelight)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 7:14:53 AM   
Carmeldelight


Posts: 139
Joined: 4/22/2005
Status: offline 		He just can not admit it to him self that the penis is not working, because of his medical contiton. He also has a back problem too, which can bring on the ED problem.

< Message edited by Carmeldelight -- 1/31/2008 7:15:47 AM >

(in reply to OmegaG)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 7:17:01 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

He just can not admit it to him self that the penis is not working, because of his medical contiton. He also has a back problem too, which can bring on the ED problem.


that would be a personality flaw in my world.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to Carmeldelight)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 7:23:18 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		And here is the crunch.

quote:

But he feels it is me and not him. 


It's not either of you.  I get that you believe it may have something to do with his medical conditions, but it is still coming down to a 'me or him'.  Get out of your head that its his medical condition.  Understand that it is due to a medical condition... once you can do that, you will stop blaming each other and work on the solution.
I am going to guess that you will go - wait a minute, I am not blaming him - but you are unconsciously by claiming the medical condition to be his.  It's a very fine line, but pride can take that and make the man feel guilty and then it is easier to turn it back onto you.
 
He needs to see and talk to a doctor about this.
 
Oh, and he is beating you for it, thats just abusive.  You need to work out whats best for you.
 
the.dark.


_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to Carmeldelight)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 7:27:05 AM   
domahpet


Posts: 1505
Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Santa Rosa
Status: offline 		ok, ill admit its early and i might be missing something.
but, here on the page it says the OP first joined on 4-22-05.
yet on her profile, it says 1-21-08. what gives?????
'scuse the highjack, but seriously, does anyone know???

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 7:30:16 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Unless you sign up both at the same time, you will have different sign up dates.  The op might have signed up here on the forum and you never have to have a profile on CM.  They are different sites, but the same (if that makes sense).
If you sign up on CC(here) the profile on CM might not even be the same person.
I used to be darkangel years ago, but the profile on the otherside isn't me, so they kindly altered my name eventually, because I wasn't a blonde american!
 
the.dark.

< Message edited by Darcyandthedark -- 1/31/2008 7:32:41 AM >

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to domahpet)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 8:12:39 AM   
venusinblu


Posts: 165
Joined: 1/12/2008
Status: offline 		Then what are you doing, or not doing, that makes him think it's you? How on earth can it be you? Doesn't he think you're sexy enough or something?  Not only is he acting out of terrible ignorance regarding his medical condition, he's doing you a great disservice by blaming you - this could have some massive impact on your self-esteem and is he worth that? 

I am so sorry to rant on about this, but my husband messed with my self-esteem regarding my attractiveness and his lack of a stiffie, and having met other cocks after him, I have to say that HIS cock was the one with the problem.


< Message edited by venusinblu -- 1/31/2008 8:13:51 AM >

_____________________________

Louis: Do you think I would let them harm you?
Claudia: No you would not Louis. Danger holds you to me.
Louis: Love holds you to me.

~~~~~~

When the going gets tough, the tough get under the table . ... Edmund Blackadder

(in reply to Carmeldelight)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 8:31:27 AM   
Zaraseeks


Posts: 130
Joined: 9/5/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

And here is the crunch.

quote:

But he feels it is me and not him. 


It's not either of you.  I get that you believe it may have something to do with his medical conditions, but it is still coming down to a 'me or him'.  Get out of your head that its his medical condition.  Understand that it is due to a medical condition... once you can do that, you will stop blaming each other and work on the solution.
I am going to guess that you will go - wait a minute, I am not blaming him - but you are unconsciously by claiming the medical condition to be his.  It's a very fine line, but pride can take that and make the man feel guilty and then it is easier to turn it back onto you.
 
He needs to see and talk to a doctor about this.
 
Oh, and he is beating you for it, thats just abusive.  You need to work out whats best for you.
 
the.dark.


 
I think this is the very best advice that could be given!!!  Thanks Darcy!

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 8:37:49 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight
What should I do, should I leave the relationship or stay until he figures out it is not my fault? I do love him but I am tried of takening the blame for his lame cock. I did not become his pet for this type of abuse. What would you do??????


this slave would encourage you to leave.
 
IF, at some point in the future, he takes responsibility for his cock and seeks professional help for the issues concerning it, THEN negotiate a relationship that fulfills you both.  

(in reply to Carmeldelight)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 8:43:07 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

The adive you have given was very healthy, but how does one get him to see and admit that the pensi is not working because of his medical conditions. I am the only person who knows and I am trying to be supportive to him. But he feels it is me and not him. 

imho, trying to supportive to him is doing more damage than good.

he has to learn how to master and handle his medical condition himself. yes be there as a support outlet however you cannot do everything to make him understand it's him not you.


_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to Carmeldelight)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 9:03:51 AM   
parttimehotty


Posts: 4002
Joined: 11/19/2007
From: Virginville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

Well, if you want to be beaten because his cock won't stay hard, stay.  If you don't, leave.  Seems pretty cut and dried to me.


Exactly

_____________________________

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Official Mommy of Jolly & Jilly

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(in reply to windchymes)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 9:23:54 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		This sounds like abuse.  He is beating you because he has a medical condition?  Does not sound like it is healthy for either one of you.  You say you love him so i will believe that, but for you own health you may have to leave him.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to parttimehotty)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 9:27:49 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		perhaps you could entice him to beat you with his flaccid dick.
couplea reasons for that. easier on you, and he can feel as tho he is participating in some fashion.

god help you if he discovers viagra or one of the other pills, however....that fucker is gonna hurt.

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 9:40:08 AM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight
I am tried of takening the blame for his lame cock.


I think once this is said, the magic has pretty much gone out of the relationship

Kreskin

_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to Carmeldelight)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 9:52:29 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		op how many men have you fucked all over the world??

(in reply to venusinblu)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal - 1/31/2008 9:57:04 AM   
lauren0221


Posts: 681
Joined: 8/29/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight
I am tried of takening the blame for his lame cock.


I think once this is said, the magic has pretty much gone out of the relationship

Kreskin


I have to agree with you there,  Jeff. And I had correct 12 typos in 8 words because I was laughing so hard.

(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 40
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