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RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 6:51:03 PM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin

I notice on the other side when I am engaged in reading profiles that many refer to their dom as 'daddy'. This troubles me somewhat, as to who wants to call a  dom daddy, is it the sub side, or the desire of the dominant party.With an idea of what may go on in a D/s relationship, is 'daddy' a good word to use in this present age?



What_makes_is_NOT_a_good_word_to_use?

1)_Not_all_people_who_choose_to_call_thier_Dom_Daddy_hae_an_age-play_
or_even_a_Daddy-Dom_dynamic.
2)_Re:age-play...learn_about_it
it_may_help_you_understand_even_if_it_"ain't_your_thing.
.http://www.ageroleplay.idleplay.net/general/why_to_ageplay.htm

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 6:55:43 PM   
SilkLaceNPearls


Posts: 30
Joined: 4/3/2006
Status: offline 		Wow I never really understood the Daddy Dom thing until I read that.  Now that I have read that I not only respect and understand it, but admire it. It is not for me but I do see why it would appeal to others. Another learning situation for me. Thanks.

_____________________________

"It is more than a lifestyle to me; it is my life as it was meant to be."

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 7:05:15 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		After a particularly intense scene, when I am still in subspace and floating  and blindfolded, he pulls me over  and says"come sit on daddys lap". This is how I spend my aftercare. he tells me what a good girl i was and kisses and holds me. No better way to spend my aftercare, I'd say.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to SilkLaceNPearls)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 7:05:51 PM   
LadyLynx


Posts: 1098
Joined: 7/24/2007
Status: offline 		I was squicked  by this as well at 1st. (which is normal, to be squicked out in general about some things.) But then I grew to accept it, and now, it appeals to me on several levels. Though it does make me wonder..........I have a loving,supportive,guidence giving relationship with my father,(always have.) so why does that appeal to me in a partner? Maybe I am addicted to it? hmm. Well I tend to go for guys that are teddybears,offbeat sense of humor, and are empathic. (like my father.) lol. something to think about. Luscious Lips, thank you for posting that, I think I will copy it:) Though could you list the link? in case I post it somewhere I want to give credit where it is due.

_____________________________

Our community maybe openminded as a whole, but it is still made up of individuals who bring in their own opinions,baggage and agendas!

Known as SwitchWitch in my local community,and on IRC Bondage.

I also go by the nic SwitchWitch on MDS.

(in reply to SilkLaceNPearls)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 7:12:24 PM   
OnlyMels


Posts: 115
Joined: 2/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19



OK, a Daddy Dom is a Male type Dominant Person Who has a strong Fathering urge,the counter part of the Mother Hen syndrome I would believe, How ever in D/s When the Daddy Dom takes a submissive, He treats her rather like a little girl(see the next page to find out more about the little girl sub) He guides, teaches  AND.. offers her what she needs most of all, unconditional love and acceptance. In my view a Daddy Dom is the most tender of Dominants. He loves His little girl with an unwaivering and passionate Love that is timeless.
     His little girl is His sunshine the bright spot in His life. He wants nothing more than to pull her close and protect her from the cruel world. But knowing He can not, He guides and teaches her helping her to be ready for this world. And then He waits, knowing she will run to Him when she becomes over whelmed and scared by the harshness of it all.
     The Daddy Dom always has His little girl's best interest  in mind,  He will help her set and reach goals, He will help her improve herself to be the best she can be,not for Him but for herself..and yes He will even at times punish her. This will no doubt break His heart, but He will always do whats best for her.
     The Daddy Dom gains as much joy and excitement from His little girl's daily acomplishment as she herself does. His pride in her shows in the tender loving way He cares for her, she has put that twinkle in His eye.
     The Daddy Dom listens to all her fears and concerns, knowing no matter how silly or childish they may sound to Him, to her they are real and He will help her confront them. He slays her dragons so to speak and He is her Hero for it.
     The Daddy Dom hears all her  dreams and desires and all the dirty little secrets, and smiles because she is bold enough and loves Him enough to open herself up so totally to Him, and He kisses her face and holds her close letting her know she is loved no matter what. she is His little girl, and He loves her unconditionaly.
      Even if during scening He brings her great pain to release her pleasures(admit it some like it .. so hush now.) He will cuddle her and show her the tenderness she craves when she needs it., when she feels unsure of herself ,He will whisper encouraging words for her, when she feels ugly He will reasure her how beautiful she is to Him.. when she is scared He will be her saftey ,her medium against the world if need be. Even though she is all woman, she is His little girl and He is her Daddy!



Wow I don't know if you pulled this off a web site but I call my dom daddy and this describes him like I wrote it myself. I almost wanna cry cause I truly think about it and realize its very true.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 7:32:59 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		Here it is.

http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-tS5EiX4jfqIQF0oZHX9rQvFAHIYdqQ--?cq=1&p=219

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to OnlyMels)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 7:39:01 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin
I notice on the other side when I am engaged in reading profiles that many refer to their dom as 'daddy'. This troubles me somewhat, as to who wants to call a  dom daddy, is it the sub side, or the desire of the dominant party.With an idea of what may go on in a D/s relationship, is 'daddy' a good word to use in this present age?

I'm sure there are plenty of places where daddy might cause discomfort on the part of some people.

When it comes to certain contexts, my response to that is either "May I educate you?" or "And I should give a fuck how you feel about it why?"


http://www.collarchat.com/m_668543/mpage_1/key_daddy/tm.htm#668698
Age play dynamics

http://www.collarchat.com/m_580865/mpage_1/key_age%252Cplay/tm.htm#580890
Ms and age play

http://www.collarchat.com/m_546688/mpage_1/key_daddy/tm.htm#546972
Another daddy dom question

http://www.collarchat.com/m_541638/mpage_2/key_daddy/tm.htm#541832
How does a dom decide to be a daddy ?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_540044/mpage_1/key_daddy/tm.htm#540129
Daddy's Girl

http://www.collarchat.com/m_278285/mpage_2/key_daddy/tm.htm#278992
What exactly is a daddy dom?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_259176/mpage_1/key_daddy/tm.htm#259184
Are there any daddies here?

Daddy/Daughter Roleplay

Daddydoms and Babygirls

Daddy?

Daddy/little girl

Hiding Daddy's Belt

Daddy doms

Daddy's little girl

Daddy? (2)





_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 7:43:42 PM   
SinergyNstrumpet


Posts: 305
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline
quote:

When it comes to certain contexts, my response to that is either "May I educate you?" or "And I should give a fuck how you feel about it why?"


I would agree with that. He never answered my question as to why it bothers him, which would pretty much determine whether I gave a fuck or whether I would try to educate him.


julia

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 8:03:49 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		my cousin asked me why i had the word Daddy encorporated into the pheonix tattoo on my arm a few months ago...and i told her this....
you know the type of relationship grandma had with grandpa, where he would take care of her and be in charge like most relationships back in the 50's, but she was still a strong woman and that didn't take anything away from her, and you know how their whole relationship and to this day (16 years after his death) she still calls him Daddy....thats the kind of relationship i want...and i have met men that want that too...

i didn't have to go into all the kink and fantasy and all that stuff...but i got my point across...and she was like, "yea, i want that too"...lol....

chelle


_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to SinergyNstrumpet)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 8:19:31 PM   
Daddyslilpookie


Posts: 498
Joined: 3/3/2008
From: OC, California
Status: offline 		I don't care what age it is my husband/Master has always been Daddy to me ever since we met I was 18 he was 31. He is my Master, protector, teacher, lover, snuggle pal and very best friend. I am sure every other girl here that has a Daddy agrees with me that it is the most intimate kind of power exchange relationship you can have.

_____________________________

Princess Andie


"A Woman Loves Only Her Master"

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 8:20:17 PM   
caro44


Posts: 270
Joined: 11/14/2005
Status: offline 		Now I know what I have been looking for.   Thank you  lusciouslips.  

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 8:22:19 PM   
SaraZeal


Posts: 144
Joined: 10/2/2007
Status: offline 		I find it somewhat funny that even people open to or even into Daddy/Little Girl relationships might have a hard limit on diapers. I don't want to be a judge or a party pooper, I also know that all tastes are in nature and that my liking diapers or ageplay does not make me any better.

I guess potty-training psychology is strong (reinforced by parents, peers, media), maybe not as strong as Freud thought it was (governing almost all aspects of sanity and life), but definitely something taboo, even in the BDSM community (which is open to many non mainstream things or kinds of people not related to BDSM). The taboo aspect, as strong as it is, is also appealing though. Doing something 'naughty' or something you've always been told not to do.

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 8:38:37 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		My reply to a different thread seems to be the best answer I have for this thread, as well as a link from there that made my heart melt because it is exactly what I have with my Daddy:

http://vanilla-not.com/basics/daddydom.html


For me, my relationship with Him is unlike any other I have ever had.  I have never respected a man the way I do Him.  I have also never been submissive to a man before, nor have I been in a D/s relationship before Him.  I am fortunate to have found someone who fits the description of the DaddyDom mentioned in the article, who wants me to succeed and prosper and to be soft enough to mold into the person He sees me becoming.  The protective, nurturing, caring aspects are what makes my Beloved my "Daddy" - a name I have only used with my father.  (And no, I don't have any weird hang-ups on my dad, he's just the only other man in my life who has treasured me and wanted the best for me as my Master does.)  While we are not into "age play" as most tend to define it, our dynamic is such that He guides me and directs me, while respecting the fact that I am a grown, intelligent woman who just happens to get "squishy" when He calls me His "babygirl." 

edited to add something from my profile that further explains my relationship with my Daddy, which may show why this particular dynamic is important to me:
 
i have found that my relationship with my Master is the most liberating one i have ever had.  Being submissive to Him is natural and makes me feel at peace with who i am.  When i put Him in a place of respect and admiration, it never takes away from who i am - it enhances it.  He holds me in a place of high regard, protects me, and makes me feel cherished, and in doing so, lifts me up rather than puts me down, while never losing His place of Dominance.  In my opinion, that is the essence of a wonderful D/s relationship - mutual respect, love, and the ability to give of oneself in order to receive so much in return.

< Message edited by Daddysredhead -- 3/13/2008 8:44:05 PM >

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to SaraZeal)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Daddies - 3/13/2008 9:23:42 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

I am sure every other girl here that has a Daddy agrees with me that it is the most intimate kind of power exchange relationship you can have.


i just wanted to respond to this line in case anyone else missinterpreted it like i did the first time couple of times i read it...
for me, having a Daddy is the most intimate kind of power relationship i can have...i am sure other girls and boys with a Daddy or Mommy will agree that it is for them as well....but i don't think it is the most intimate kind of power exchange relationship that exists....just what works best for me....

chelle


_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to Daddyslilpookie)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Daddies - 3/14/2008 7:06:45 AM   
Aneirin


Posts: 6121
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Tamaris
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SinergyNstrumpet

quote:

When it comes to certain contexts, my response to that is either "May I educate you?" or "And I should give a fuck how you feel about it why?"


I would agree with that. He never answered my question as to why it bothers him, which would pretty much determine whether I gave a fuck or whether I would try to educate him.


julia



My apologies, I did not answer you, that may very well have something to do with our time zone difference. Chances are I was in one of those rare conditions of sleep.

Why the term gives rise to an uneasiness, this might be purely down to misunderstanding on my part, or eroneously linking age play to more sinister things, things very much in the vanilla public eye.

Not saying the relationship in the BDSM world is similar, but how others, others being vanilla might see it.


_____________________________

Everything we are is the result of what we have thought, the mind is everything, what we think, we become - Guatama Buddha

Conservatism is distrust of people tempered by fear - William Gladstone

(in reply to SinergyNstrumpet)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Daddies - 3/14/2008 7:41:16 AM   
dawntreader


Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

After a particularly intense scene, when I am still in subspace and floating  and blindfolded, he pulls me over  and says"come sit on daddys lap". This is how I spend my aftercare. he tells me what a good girl i was and kisses and holds me. No better way to spend my aftercare, I'd say.


i have to say your post on Daddy Doms was enlightening to me also
And as to the above quote...THAT is smoking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Daddies - 3/14/2008 8:55:34 AM   
SinergyNstrumpet


Posts: 305
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Why the term gives rise to an uneasiness, this might be purely down to misunderstanding on my part, or eroneously linking age play to more sinister things, things very much in the vanilla public eye.


In our country many vanilla people call their mate "mom" "dad" "daddy" "grandma"... or whatever. I call my Sinergy "Daddy" in public often, no one even glances our way. It is in our popular culture even, like "come to daddy".

Now I cannot answer for everyone, some people are into age play... we aren't, although there are times I feel "younger" when I am with him, I do not necessarily feel like I am a juvenile. I think that in our unconscious there are many archetypes, "daddy" or "mommy" are very powerful archetypes, and I think that this sort of power exchange plays into that archetype.

I wanted to add, age play has nothing to do with actually wanting to be with people too young to consent. If a person wants that, they are not going to go for a grown person. It isn't even related to that.

julia

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Daddies - 3/14/2008 9:24:03 AM   
ThundersCry


Posts: 892
Status: offline 		Thansks for the read lusciouslips...
 
Hard to put into words <for me>... what *its* like ...and whoever wrote that article did a good job of wording *it*.
 
I will agree with you...sometimes Daddy just has to hurt....her.
 
Tsk Tsk

(in reply to SinergyNstrumpet)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Daddies - 3/14/2008 9:26:59 AM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19
OK, a Daddy Dom is a Male type Dominant Person Who has a strong Fathering urge,the counter part of the Mother Hen syndrome I would believe, How ever in D/s When the Daddy Dom takes a submissive, He treats her rather like a little girl(see the next page to find out more about the little girl sub) He guides, teaches  AND.. offers her what she needs most of all, unconditional love and acceptance. In my view a Daddy Dom is the most tender of Dominants. He loves His little girl with an unwaivering and passionate Love that is timeless.
   His little girl is His sunshine the bright spot in His life. He wants nothing more than to pull her close and protect her from the cruel world. But knowing He can not, He guides and teaches her helping her to be ready for this world. And then He waits, knowing she will run to Him when she becomes over whelmed and scared by the harshness of it all.
   The Daddy Dom always has His little girl's best interest  in mind,  He will help her set and reach goals, He will help her improve herself to be the best she can be,not for Him but for herself..and yes He will even at times punish her. This will no doubt break His heart, but He will always do whats best for her.
   The Daddy Dom gains as much joy and excitement from His little girl's daily acomplishment as she herself does. His pride in her shows in the tender loving way He cares for her, she has put that twinkle in His eye.
   The Daddy Dom listens to all her fears and concerns, knowing no matter how silly or childish they may sound to Him, to her they are real and He will help her confront them. He slays her dragons so to speak and He is her Hero for it.
   The Daddy Dom hears all her  dreams and desires and all the dirty little secrets, and smiles because she is bold enough and loves Him enough to open herself up so totally to Him, and He kisses her face and holds her close letting her know she is loved no matter what. she is His little girl, and He loves her unconditionaly.
    Even if during scening He brings her great pain to release her pleasures(admit it some like it .. so hush now.) He will cuddle her and show her the tenderness she craves when she needs it., when she feels unsure of herself ,He will whisper encouraging words for her, when she feels ugly He will reasure her how beautiful she is to Him.. when she is scared He will be her saftey ,her medium against the world if need be. Even though she is all woman, she is His little girl and He is her Daddy!

 
What is written above what is a  "daddy dom" IMO is not a daddy  just the qualities ( plus more ) of a wonderful Dom/Master. Such as I have had.
Never could I have called him daddy LOL.
I think daddy is the IN Thing ( I know it's not  new) I'll bet in 5 years there wont be so many references to daddy dom
 
 

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please



(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Daddies - 3/14/2008 9:41:51 AM   
sweetwenchie


Posts: 1993
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Sacramento, California
Status: offline 		Oh i don't know sparkling, considering how many of us that enjoy and engage in that type of dynamic have had to tolerate the squicked out looks and snide comments from others, i hardly consider it an "in thing".   Those of use who enjoy it will not cast it aside as a trendy thing.  It simply is the dynamic and power exchance some people enjoy.  Disparaging those who either enjoy it, or those who do not, seems a bit "snobbish" and condescending to me.  Just my thoughts...

< Message edited by sweetwenchie -- 3/14/2008 10:09:34 AM >

_____________________________

"To make oneself an object, to make oneself passive, is a very different thing from being a passive object." - De Beauvoir

"You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist." - Nietzsche

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 40
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