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RE: Daddies - 3/15/2008 11:59:20 AM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddyDeerest

And as usual, Miss lusciouslips brings us beauty and understanding, with modesty that maks her more attractive with every thread.
.




Dang, you're sweet. makes me what to call you Daddy!

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to DaddyDeerest)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Daddies - 3/15/2008 12:10:27 PM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin

I notice on the other side when I am engaged in reading profiles that many refer to their dom as 'daddy'. This troubles me somewhat, as to who wants to call a  dom daddy, is it the sub side, or the desire of the dominant party.With an idea of what may go on in a D/s relationship, is 'daddy' a good word to use in this present age?



You know, I am going to bring over the stuff I said on the other Daddy thread, with some new addtions, as I think it works here too:

I've never fully lived the dynamic.  My first submissive was almost 20 years younger than I was and sometimes called me "Daddy".  But she also called me "Sir" and "Master".  I noted that the "Daddy" came out more when she was in need of nurturing and being made to feel safe or when she already felt very safe and loved by me. 

I've been involved with and have known submissives who do not like the whole idea at all.  Not just the term of "Daddy" but the whole idea of it.  Though they might be involved with an older man, the idea of addressing him as "Daddy" or anything remotely like that squicked them bigtime.  Of course, most of their relationships weren't built on any kind of Daddy/little girl foundation.  Of the ones that were, I found it a bit ironic and amusing that, despite the underlying "Daddy/little" girl foundation, they would no more call him "Daddy" than fly to the moon.  But that was an observation, not a judgement.  They had to go with what was comfortable for them.

As I noted earlier, I have been called "Daddy" and yes, it does push certain buttons.  Like wenchie, I am sometimes a sick, twisted, individual.  For me, it is not always the age buttons that are pushed although at times, a certain level of age is hit and played with. While I love the nurturing and guiding aspects of a "Daddy", I'd be lying if I didn't say that the darker elements attract me at times also.

I'd also note that I wouldn't pamper a "little girl" any more than a submissive who was not into "Daddy/little girl".  In my mind, this is still an adult woman...my submissive...and given that I have raised 2 ums already, I have no desire to raise an adult.  I noted above that the age thing has sometimes been approached...and it has, during play.  Never outside the play arena, though.  As I said, this is an adult woman I am with and I would expect her to behave as such.  In short, and at risk of repeating myself, like an adult submissive woman who happens to approach D/s from the normal perspective with the added fillip of "Daddy/little girl".

As to whether it is the proper word to use in "today's day and age", like others I have also observed it used between couples who I am quite sure were not into D/s (though you never know, right?  ~g~).  And given that I have heard my daughters and sometimes their friends refer to their boyfriends to their face...lovingly of course (~rolls my eyes~)...as "bastard", I think I'd almost prefer to hear them use "Daddy".

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Daddies - 3/15/2008 12:29:56 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		My Master has been in the scene for 17 years and even when He wasn't, lots of girls (even nilla ones) just used to call Him "Big Daddy."  When people see Him, they think it tends to fit.  He's a really big guy, 6'2", about 300 lbs., with a warm smile and laugh, and a quiet dominance about Him.  I told Him in the beginning that He was like a teddy bear, which is completely different from how He must be in His profession.  I understand why other women in the lifestyle are drawn to Him and tend to call Him "Sir" right away, even when using His first name is perfectly acceptable.  There's just something about being on the receiving end of His smile, knowing that you put it there in some way, that is scrumptious.  It reminds me of being a little girl and wanting to make my parents happy, esp. my dad because I've always been a daddy's girl.  Positive reinforcement with good, decent men is part of what makes me tick.

So, to say that the notion of women calling their men "Daddy" is somewhat novel is odd to me.  I've heard it all my life.  From my grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, and siblings.  I used to refer to my ex-husband as Daddy to the kids and he still refers to me as Mommy when speaking to them.  (As in, "Make sure you listen to Mommy and do as you're told.")  It's my title, no kink involved. 

As far as in WIITWD, I don't think it's necessarily a novel thing, but perhaps part of an evolving process that some men have made.  Maybe the men who identify with the numerous different descriptions of "DaddyDom-ism" feel comfortable with that title or role.  Maybe it's like the ever-over-debated BBW label.  Some identify with the definition and others don't, some like the label and others prefer something else.  It's all in what seems natural or proper for your particular situation.  If others do not like it, they need not prescribe to it.  I certainly do not expect to agree with everything that everyone does, but they will not always agree with me.  It's ok, it's life, and it's to be expected.  Doesn't mean I have to bash someone over the head to make them agree with me.  I'd rather have a good, spirited, intellectual debate than have them scream "uncle" because I was acting like a cave woman with my opinion.  That's just me, so if  "cave play" is your thing - go for it.  I'm certainly not judging. 

Respectfully,
DRH

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: Daddies - 3/15/2008 12:36:15 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SaraZeal

I commented earlier on how I find it funny that people who are into Daddy/Dom type relationships and who may be into ageplay would list diapers as a hard limit, but that's just something I observed and thought was worthy of mention.


Sara:  This kind of got lost in the back and forth stuff surrounding it.  I find it interesting that it appears you are equating ageplay with diapers, and Daddy Dom relationships with those. I'm curious about your thoughts on that.  For many people, one has nothing to do with any of the others. 

I wish you well in finding what you seek.

Cali


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to SaraZeal)
Profile   Post #: 84
RE: Daddies - 3/15/2008 1:56:58 PM   
SaraZeal


Posts: 144
Joined: 10/2/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: SaraZeal

I commented earlier on how I find it funny that people who are into Daddy/Dom type relationships and who may be into ageplay would list diapers as a hard limit, but that's just something I observed and thought was worthy of mention.


Sara:  This kind of got lost in the back and forth stuff surrounding it.  I find it interesting that it appears you are equating ageplay with diapers, and Daddy Dom relationships with those. I'm curious about your thoughts on that.  For many people, one has nothing to do with any of the others. 

I wish you well in finding what you seek.

Cali



I don't equate them really. Though I think that for some it might go well together, be a good 'combo' so to speak, like corsets and leather might be to others, while many in either wouldn't do the other.

And there's also that it's listed as a hard limit rather than say, not listed, listed as a dislike. I don't list foot worship, not really an interest of mine, but it's also not a hard limit. Do you understand the contrast I'm trying to show here?

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Daddies - 3/15/2008 2:42:47 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		ageplay and being a daddies girl isn't even remotely linked to diapers, for me. I was potty trained by 2 back then and I am still potty trained. I have no interest  with in ageplay and Daddy dom ness,to pretend I am not potty trained, or that I am not perfectly capable of using a toilet. not saying that's why any one else likes them, just me personally it has no value to me.


Now on ocasion when I was sick and had direah I would of loved a diaper, for nothing more than saving myself the embarrasment of pooping in my clothing, or being unable to leave the stores bathroom cause I couldn't stop pooping lol.



it's perfectly understandable in my eyes to be into ageplay and daddie doms and what not, and want nothing to do with diapers.
quote:

ORIGINAL: SaraZeal

I find it somewhat funny that even people open to or even into Daddy/Little Girl relationships might have a hard limit on diapers. The taboo aspect, as strong as it is, is also appealing though. Doing something 'naughty' or something you've always been told not to do.



< Message edited by YourhandMyAss -- 3/15/2008 3:01:36 PM >

(in reply to SaraZeal)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Daddies - 4/25/2008 7:15:15 PM   
mypain56


Posts: 84
Joined: 11/5/2007
Status: offline 		that my friend is so beautiful i actually got choked up by reading it. my Daddy and i evolved in this dynamic and it has changed us for the better making our life together deeper and so much more intense. Although i have found myself being more emotional about things wanting to please him in every way imaginable, he is the center of my universe and he knows how much i love and adore him. My Daddy, my protector, my love, my teacher.
 
 
melly/srln: 654-049-049

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Daddies - 4/25/2008 7:26:03 PM   
impossiblesub


Posts: 150
Joined: 4/20/2008
Status: offline 		My ex-wife used to call me Daddy all the time and we were not in an "official" D/S relationship. Of course we had kids. Part of a long-term relationship with another person is often the replication of the relationship a person had with a parent of the opposite sex. At least they are satisfying these desires with persons older than 18.

< Message edited by impossiblesub -- 4/25/2008 7:29:02 PM >

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Daddies - 4/25/2008 7:36:25 PM   
impossiblesub


Posts: 150
Joined: 4/20/2008
Status: offline 		 I heard she was looking for a sex-daddy. LOL

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Daddies - 4/25/2008 7:50:20 PM   
Usako


Posts: 697
Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline 		Quick reply; it's better than "Master."

For me the term "Master" is pretentious and makes me snicker. Same with "Sir" "Lord" and any other stupid term. However, usually "Daddy" is a happy word. Happy, cheerful and it sounds loving. All those other terms are cold and I can't call anyone those things without laughing to their face.

(in reply to impossiblesub)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: Daddies - 4/25/2008 7:54:17 PM   
orfunboi


Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline 		I used to call my mistress "daddi", the idea of calling her mommy just didn't work well for us. Course my daddi had bigger boobs than anyone elses but I think that was a good thing.

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: Daddies - 4/25/2008 7:59:58 PM   
daddysliloneds


Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline 		it can come from either side; though the real question should be, why does it trouble you? why do you care?  what does 'this age' have to do with anything?  my great grandma calls her husband daddy and they're going on 96 years old.  time to step up to the plate and realize that in this day and age, as with the past, it's none of your business what anyone calls their mate, as long as they're happy with it, AND, it's not always referencing incestual relations and the like for fucks sake!

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin

I notice on the other side when I am engaged in reading profiles that many refer to their dom as 'daddy'. This troubles me somewhat, as to who wants to call a  dom daddy, is it the sub side, or the desire of the dominant party.With an idea of what may go on in a D/s relationship, is 'daddy' a good word to use in this present age?


(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 92
RE: Daddies - 4/25/2008 8:11:30 PM   
BoundDown


Posts: 76
Joined: 11/25/2007
Status: offline 		Luscious, that actually moved me.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Daddies - 4/26/2008 11:02:49 AM   
graceadieu


Posts: 1518
Joined: 3/20/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline 		The Daddy/Mommy thing is really major squick for me (especially when I get contacted by people that're actually old enough to be my parents), but I'm glad I got to read some other people's perspectives on it on here.

< Message edited by graceadieu -- 4/26/2008 11:03:56 AM >

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Daddies - 4/26/2008 11:19:40 AM   
angelwithhonor


Posts: 193
Joined: 5/16/2007
Status: offline 		i commented on my profile before i closed it to not seeking at this point. that i seeked a Daddy/Dom. but for me it was not even close as a Daddy/daughter relationship. i feel most Doms are in a somewhat Daddy personality. Daddy are protectors, nutures,comforting,disclinarians so forth. but i also put in my profile that i seeked 1950 style household and strict tpe. thank it all just boils down to what fits Y/you both. i dont agree with the Daddy/daughter relationship, for me that is. not judging bc no one has that right even if W/we dont agree. it would just be hard to say Daddy. and i cant at all with the way my spiritual being could i call them lord...

(in reply to graceadieu)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: Daddies - 4/26/2008 11:29:36 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin
... is 'daddy' a good word to use in this present age?

After 1253 posts for the OP, this big daddy thinks it seems like a strange question.
I'd rather think the point was why the use of the term Daddy is "troubling" to him.  Do some childhood issues need resolving ?

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: Daddies - 4/26/2008 2:01:55 PM   
southerntannedf


Posts: 4
Joined: 4/16/2008
Status: offline 		Have I used the term daddy? probably at least in ome way shape or form with almost every serious relationhip I have been in in this lifestyle. Not a hell of a lot of them but they each lasted quite a while it seems. I think maybe t comes from an old southern social thing. The "My Ass Belongs To Soebody" syndrome. As a kid it belongs to your parents then your teachers help to form your character. Work owns it while you try to make ends meet. If you go to church your religion owns a peice of it to ome extent. What with all that leadership and owning of my ass in my life as I got oldr and grew up it seems only natural someone should driect own and help me through stuff now...daddy is a term of respect. Master coms hard for me. First names are not alway appropriate. And then terms I won't even mention I have used for fear some other subs will quake in their shoes and rattle their handcuffs And besdies they get me in hot excrement when I use them. See I am good I used the polite term as I haven't been posting here for long and ya'll don't know me at all. Lest I offend someone.  Daddy was something I could deal with. Occasionally I have met the guy who thought it was only for ageplay and no I didn't dress up in a pink frilly dress for him. But you know if someone is into that far be it from me to diss on their fetish. They don't have to live with my concept, so I don't have to live with theirs. Its all about comfortability as an indivudual. Especially those that can spell. Unlike myself of course. But daddy is on of the highest forms of respect I can give to a Dominant. I loved cherished and trusted my dad and while I don't think he replacs that man I do think the useage of it lets him know how much I valu his opinions of me feel safe with him and want to please him..   nessa  just my two cents worth and I hear the price of copper is goign up by the day

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: Daddies - 4/26/2008 5:56:09 PM   
ProfJoe


Posts: 75
Joined: 6/7/2007
Status: offline 		My girl like being 'five' -- no need for a diaper. Another friend is 'eleven' -- no need for a diaper. Lil girls identify with different ages, and I suppose some are into infant play, but what's this big hangup on diapers, anyway?

Just as a point of reference, Guy Baldwin ("Slavecraft") says that "Daddy" is a term for a master in the old guard (gay) tradition who enjoys training a submissive who demonstrates weakness and wants/needs to grow toward his potential. A master doesn't put up with weakness and has no interest in his slave's growth or fulfillment but only in the service he receives. Daddies in that life referred to their adult gay male submissives in training as "boys."

It's my (uninformed) opinion that "Daddy" is one who nurtures, supports, encourages, and works toward the development of his girl's potential.

So far as gender is concerned, one of the most respected female tops in our area is known as "Daddy _______" by everyone, including her bois.
\
Finally, a "daddy" can have other faces. I'm also called, on occasion, "Master," but by no one but my girl.

Prof Joe

(in reply to southerntannedf)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: Daddies - 4/27/2008 3:22:55 PM   
ImpGrrl


Posts: 575
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19
OK, a Daddy Dom is a Male type Dominant Person Who has a strong Fathering urge,the counter part of the Mother Hen syndrome I would believe, How ever in D/s When the Daddy Dom takes a submissive, He treats her rather like a little girl(see the next page to find out more about the little girl sub) He guides, teaches  AND.. offers her what she needs most of all, unconditional love and acceptance. In my view a Daddy Dom is the most tender of Dominants. He loves His little girl with an unwaivering and passionate Love that is timeless.
     His little girl is His sunshine the bright spot in His life. He wants nothing more than to pull her close and protect her from the cruel world. But knowing He can not, He guides and teaches her helping her to be ready for this world. And then He waits, knowing she will run to Him when she becomes over whelmed and scared by the harshness of it all.
     The Daddy Dom always has His little girl's best interest  in mind,  He will help her set and reach goals, He will help her improve herself to be the best she can be,not for Him but for herself..and yes He will even at times punish her. This will no doubt break His heart, but He will always do whats best for her.
     The Daddy Dom gains as much joy and excitement from His little girl's daily acomplishment as she herself does. His pride in her shows in the tender loving way He cares for her, she has put that twinkle in His eye.
     The Daddy Dom listens to all her fears and concerns, knowing no matter how silly or childish they may sound to Him, to her they are real and He will help her confront them. He slays her dragons so to speak and He is her Hero for it.
     The Daddy Dom hears all her  dreams and desires and all the dirty little secrets, and smiles because she is bold enough and loves Him enough to open herself up so totally to Him, and He kisses her face and holds her close letting her know she is loved no matter what. she is His little girl, and He loves her unconditionaly.
      Even if during scening He brings her great pain to release her pleasures(admit it some like it .. so hush now.) He will cuddle her and show her the tenderness she craves when she needs it., when she feels unsure of herself ,He will whisper encouraging words for her, when she feels ugly He will reasure her how beautiful she is to Him.. when she is scared He will be her saftey ,her medium against the world if need be. Even though she is all woman, she is His little girl and He is her Daddy!


OR, Daddy is a mean SOB and the two of them get off on the "wrongness" of it all...

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: Daddies - 4/27/2008 3:29:09 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		I call my Sir daddy and hes 6 months younger than me.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to ImpGrrl)
Profile   Post #: 100
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