Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? Page: <<   < prev  4 5 6 [7] 8   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 4/15/2008 9:53:44 AM   
NakedOnMyChain


Posts: 2431
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissMagnolia

quote:

ORIGINAL: NakedOnMyChain



I haven't read the other posts yet, but I had to throw my opinion into the ring.



quote:

I read that as "throw my onion into the ring". I got very confused. Yes, I now have my glasses on.




LOL.  Well, I have been known to throw the occasional vegetable when displeased.

< Message edited by NakedOnMyChain -- 4/15/2008 9:56:41 AM >


_____________________________

"Oh, it's torture, but I'm almost there."
~The Cure

"I ask for so little. Just fear me, love me, do as I say, and I will be your slave."
~The Labyrinth

(in reply to MissMagnolia)
Profile   Post #: 121
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 4/15/2008 10:26:53 AM   
Poetryinpain


Posts: 341
Joined: 3/20/2008
Status: offline
~fr~

Some of us old fogies still see sex as something to be indulged only in the company of someone we have great affection for. Note I do not say love. Of course, when one loves another sex is a great part of the package, but it can spice up a relationship that hasn't reached the 'love' point and may never do so. I confess that for many years 'love' was the only criterion I would follow, but as the years have gone by I have lifted self-imposed restrictions.

I have known marriages that were deeply affectionate (even loving) but non-sexual friendships (usually for medical reasons). The need not to have sex in those circumstances was mutually acceptable to both parties. I have also seen relationships that were not marriages but included sex (lots of sex sometimes) that were just as strong as marriages. And I have known people who engage in serial casual sex and exhibit no lack of moral fiber.

One chooses one's battles, and if one doesn't wish to become trampled, one chooses wisely. Sexual activity between (or among) consenting adults, if it is harming no one physically, emotionally, or financially, is not a battle I choose to engage. There are so many other things that need to be challenged.

I sometimes feel like I need to bathe my eyeballs after reading some of the messages I have received. But a quick use of the 'delete' button clears my mailbox and my head.

pip, to each his/her own


_____________________________

There is none so blind as he who will not see.

(in reply to NakedOnMyChain)
Profile   Post #: 122
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 4/17/2008 10:23:53 PM   
DChammer


Posts: 59
Joined: 10/31/2006
From: DC
Status: offline
Isn't everyone's aspiration to be a slut?

What is better than waking up and having no clue where you are, how you got there, or know who you are with, but still feeling all very good about it when you see the used condom wrapper on the nightstand.


(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 123
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 4/17/2008 10:27:40 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
*snicker*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to DChammer)
Profile   Post #: 124
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 4/23/2008 4:44:58 PM   
RainbowBalloon


Posts: 5
Joined: 4/20/2008
Status: offline
Well the fact that he had to tell the internet (i.e. whoever reads his blogs/ journals) that he got rejected just shows that he has low self-esteem and is looking for justification from others.



(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 125
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 4/23/2008 4:58:47 PM   
texancutie2


Posts: 40
Joined: 11/23/2007
Status: offline
I am sure it has been harped about already....but...but...but...casual play can be just BDSM play and doesn't have to include sex, though it could.  But then again I say to each his own thing.  Funny that this came up at a time when I am seeking to explore more bottoming type activities with another female switch or Dominant, under my Dom's watchful eye.  Can't seem to spell today...oh well.



< Message edited by texancutie2 -- 4/23/2008 5:00:01 PM >

(in reply to katsmeow)
Profile   Post #: 126
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 4:25:49 PM   
thedudetg


Posts: 2
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
Katsmeow, I see what your saying, and I agree, but you shouldn't assume every man you meet on here is looking for a quick hook-up or a one-night stand. There are several dominant men that seek romance, and from what all I've seen, most of the best BDSM relationships are the ones that have a hearty romantic foundation. You can't assume that the man you might message is looking for sex right away, he could be looking to get to know you, learn about your life, and learn about who you are, and if the two of you make a great match. He might not even think about any sort of "bedroom" relationship with you until you bring it up, really, out of respect for you. There are gentlemen out there like that, but they may not be so common. If you find one, I'd recommend you don't dismiss him into the group of all the people you've found that have been looking for easy women.

(in reply to texancutie2)
Profile   Post #: 127
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 5:32:17 PM   
Owner4SexSlave


Posts: 1311
Joined: 4/4/2007
Status: offline
This lifestyle is just a slice of the world.  There are always those people who simply wanna fuck, and those who are seeking a deeper more meaningful relationship.  It's not a reflection of the lifestyle, but of human nature itself.  

Ok, this is a Kinky Adult BDSM sex dating website after all.  It's a bit of a magnet for people who are sexual and into BDSM to come here.   There will always be people simply looking to fuck coming here, there will also always be people looking for deeper meaningful relationships.

Yes, it's possible to keep your own morals in tact and be in this lifestyle.  The morals of other people might not always be the same of yours.   Just look for somebody who's like minded. 

There are many Doms online that are looking for a serious relationship, just be patient.   Have you thought about being more active in your search, by responding to profiles of those that appear might be a match?


(in reply to katsmeow)
Profile   Post #: 128
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 5:48:09 PM   
Hippiekinkster


Posts: 5512
Joined: 11/20/2007
From: Liechtenstein
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

quote:

ORIGINAL: katsmeow

So, I don't post a lot, but something is really bothering me more and more on here. The more I read e-mail, the more people just want 'play.' Is it impossible to keep your morals in tact and still be in this lifestyle?
 
I talked to someone today who wrote a nasty journal entry about me, because I'm apparently prude. Just because I don't want to take my clothes off and play with a stranger I just met? I call that being safe... But really, my point of view on this is, play being like a vanilla second date, the initial one is a nice dinner, and second one is bringing over edible body paint and licking it off of one another's nude bodies with no emotional connection. I don't deny that there are exceptions to this, but really, is it that common?
 
What happened to the days when people were sane, and didn't want girls that fucked everything with legs?  =[

Oh before AIDS and HIV? The world of the 60's and 70's makes today's scene look like a fundamentalist church outing.
Yeah, really. Damn, that was fun.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 129
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 6:01:14 PM   
riffmaker


Posts: 4
Joined: 12/4/2007
Status: offline
sends wild applause and wolf whistles err maybe not the whistles

(in reply to katsmeow)
Profile   Post #: 130
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 6:37:25 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline
quote:

Lots and lots of play that can be done without sex ... and even without taking too many clothes off!

And we would want to leave the clothes on because....?????

(Just wanting to understand the concept here )


_____________________________



(in reply to MaamJay)
Profile   Post #: 131
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 6:49:06 PM   
servantheart


Posts: 960
Joined: 10/26/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DChammer

Isn't everyone's aspiration to be a slut?

What is better than waking up and having no clue where you are, how you got there, or know who you are with, but still feeling all very good about it when you see the used condom wrapper on the nightstand.






_____________________________

When you really trust someone, you have to be okay with not understanding some things.
~Real Live Preacher, Real Live Preacher weblog, 07-08-04; Anonymous author of RealLivePreacher.com

(in reply to DChammer)
Profile   Post #: 132
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 6:51:38 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline
It's a fast food mentality that the scene and general life these days foster.

Don't worry about the babies with no patience, a man will come along eventually.

Just don't let the squalling from the infant minds harden you to him when he arrives.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to katsmeow)
Profile   Post #: 133
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 7:03:10 PM   
HornyToadsMI


Posts: 287
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline
Wow, this is a tasty little thread.......

Each kink to its own.  Be gentle where you tread, hon.  Some of the best play times are "spur of the moment" with a stranger.  That is how i found BDSM.  i was at a swingers convention with my husband Toad, and W/we found the dungeon. i was flogged by a Dom while He watched.  It was intense and incredible.  So, dont judge until you try - you might be surprised.....

_____________________________

i have the best job in the world - my Boss whips me!!!

Go with your gut - yes, I am being a Smart Ass!

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 134
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 7:06:18 PM   
HornyToadsMI


Posts: 287
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DChammer

Isn't everyone's aspiration to be a slut?

What is better than waking up and having no clue where you are, how you got there, or know who you are with, but still feeling all very good about it when you see the used condom wrapper on the nightstand.




Sounds like the aftermath of a house party at the Toad's Pad.......tee hee hee

_____________________________

i have the best job in the world - my Boss whips me!!!

Go with your gut - yes, I am being a Smart Ass!

(in reply to DChammer)
Profile   Post #: 135
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 7:40:44 PM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: katsmeow

So, I don't post a lot, but something is really bothering me more and more on here. The more I read e-mail, the more people just want 'play.' Is it impossible to keep your morals in tact and still be in this lifestyle?
 
I talked to someone today who wrote a nasty journal entry about me, because I'm apparently prude. Just because I don't want to take my clothes off and play with a stranger I just met? I call that being safe... But really, my point of view on this is, play being like a vanilla second date, the initial one is a nice dinner, and second one is bringing over edible body paint and licking it off of one another's nude bodies with no emotional connection. I don't deny that there are exceptions to this, but really, is it that common?
 
What happened to the days when people were sane, and didn't want girls that fucked everything with legs?  =[

:: shrugs ::

You may find that much about this site and the internet in general is much easier to take if you...
a) only rarely take any of it very seriously
b) keep a grain of salt the size of your average salt lick handy

Just my two bits on the subject... YMMV

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to katsmeow)
Profile   Post #: 136
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 10:22:47 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline
I've just read through the whole thread.. My curiosity was piqued by the OP (funny thing curiosity, it gets you into trouble sometimes) and I originally intended just to read through the first couple of pages and move on.. But then I came across much knicker-twisting and so I read further.

Take a look at me, my life, who I am, and I'm sure you will find no end of labels with which to attach to me, stereotypes, you can make any number of assumptions, judgments, form your opinions without even having made any contact with me. I am aware of this, I live out there in the real world, but I know who I am and I know who I am not. I have my own moral code, it is my own moral code, and I live it 24/7 and stick to it without any exceptions. I feel I have a somewhat rational and balanced view of life and society, I see people for who they are.

Life is life, and it doesn't matter how sick, depraved, sordid it gets, that person is still living and there is still something that person can get from life. It's their life, they have their own perceptions of life, they have to make their decisions, they speak the words, they commit the deeds, and they live with the conseqnences. Living has much to do with motivation and reason, and you may not understand these or be able to work them out in others.

The Internet in many ways is a community and marketplace of faith and belief. Everything on it, irrespective of whether it is presented as fact or opinion, is subject to both perception and perspective. Sometimes there is even something known as suspension of belief.. you don't believe it in reality, but you put your own objections aside and give something or someone the benefit of the doubt. Welcome to the world of virtual reality, and virtual reality can only ever really be subject to your own perception of reality. What this tends to do is polarize people to varying degrees to two opposite extremes - extreme gullibility and extreme scepticism. Go through the boards on any day and I can guarantee to you that you will find people who fit into either of these two extremes, in varying degrees.

But this is in reality no different from life, from opening your front door and stepping outside into the real world. The acronym BDSM is not an oasis from society, but part of it, and whatever is out there on the streets, good and evil, can be found too online via the Internet, it can be found on this website, it can be found on e-Bay, wherever you care to look. The common denominator is you, and what is in your head - your mind. It's you who switches the computer on, it's you who uses the mouse to click on icons to start programs, it's you who types on the keyboard, who enters websites, who reads, processes information, who contributes and writes the words.

We only know each other as far as our perception will allow us to. Yes I look around me, I see people doing things or getting involved in things I wouldn't, I see people out on the prowl, looking for an easy lay, casual play, casual sex, but I also see people who don't. But you know I don't live their lives, my moral code doesn't apply to them. It only applies to me.

It's very easy to get upset with other people online, other people can upset you, but the responsibility (big word here) lies with you, you have to make that decision. You cannot be held responsible for people upsetting you, but then again you ARE responsible for anticipating how people will treat you and perceive you. People make mistakes, people misjudge you, people misunderstood, because they are human. Just like you. Nobody is perfect. But where the responsibility lies is how you respond when you are upset. You are the one making the decision here.

If I were to get on my moral high horse every time someone upset me be sure I would be starting threads here a couple of times every day and ranting like a loonie. Yes nobody is perfect, me included, I get the wrong end of the stick, and I don't always react the best way, but quite often it's best to stop and think. Quite often the best response is no response. Let it go, move on, refuse to play the game or take the bait. Life is about choosing your causes, choosing your issues, and choosing your actions and reactions.

You see other people quite often perceive you differently to the way you perceive yourself. Nothing you can do about that. Besides it's their right. If you are happy with being who you are, the way you live, and your moral code, why make it a subject of discussion? You have nothing to prove to anyone, not everybody is going to like you or treat you the way you want to be treated. It's best just to be yourself, live the way you want to live, and let everyone else work it out for themselves.

Smile, pay compliments - it confuses them even further.

Stella, the original sinner..

< Message edited by stella41b -- 5/12/2008 10:23:51 PM >


_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to Padriag)
Profile   Post #: 137
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 11:42:41 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
great post, Stella :) (as usual....)

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 138
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/12/2008 11:51:32 PM   
beltainefaerie


Posts: 610
Joined: 4/15/2006
Status: offline
To the OP, I get your irritation, but I also understand why people felt you were taking the position that anyone who played casually was immoral.  You are an adult and get to choose whether to play or not to play, to get naked or not, etc. 
I personally love being called a slut, but I wouldn't just hop into anyone's bed.  I was totally monogamous for the first 6 years of my marriage and would be still if my husband had not decided that he wanted to let me honor my poly nature.  For years I practiced BDSM without any sex, so I think what others have mentioned about play not immediately indicating nudity or sex is important.  Even with my Master, for about the first year, I was required to remain partially clothed.  

If it were up to me, I would engage in casual play at parties, but not sex.  However, those in charge of me have directed that I may not play with strangers, even knowing it wouldn't involve sex.  I get that for some people, play is as intimate as sex, whether sex is part of it or not.  Perhaps you are one of those people.

All of these choices are personal.  Someone is not right or wrong in these kinds of choices, but merely following their own code.  It is fine for us all to have different codes.  Just try and find parters that match your view of morality and all should be well.

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 139
RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? - 5/13/2008 2:45:27 AM   
BrigandDoom


Posts: 155
Joined: 12/29/2007
From: Nottingham
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: katsmeow

So, I don't post a lot, but something is really bothering me more and more on here. The more I read e-mail, the more people just want 'play.' Is it impossible to keep your morals in tact and still be in this lifestyle?
 
I talked to someone today who wrote a nasty journal entry about me, because I'm apparently prude. Just because I don't want to take my clothes off and play with a stranger I just met? I call that being safe... But really, my point of view on this is, play being like a vanilla second date, the initial one is a nice dinner, and second one is bringing over edible body paint and licking it off of one another's nude bodies with no emotional connection. I don't deny that there are exceptions to this, but really, is it that common?
 
What happened to the days when people were sane, and didn't want girls that fucked everything with legs?  =[


Unfortunately it's one of the things you have to endure when using the internet, along with the pisstakers, scammers and general fuckwitts who seem to infect all walks of life. As I point out to people who don't like what my morals or views, "if you don't like, don't bother me because the chances are I'm not going to like you or want to get to know you!"
We are all individuals, we all have our own perspective and to be honest unless your dealing with someone who advocating something illegal or downright dangerous then it a case of "judge not, unless ye wishes to be judged".

_____________________________

Brigand Doom

There is only one, accept no alternatives!

(in reply to katsmeow)
Profile   Post #: 140
Page:   <<   < prev  4 5 6 [7] 8   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Seriously, when did this become a joke? Page: <<   < prev  4 5 6 [7] 8   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.113