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Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 8:57:20 AM

GimpinDenial

Posts: 1145
Joined: 4/20/2008
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One of the reasons I decided to create this alter ego was this...

I have a relative that told me about Collar Me a loooong time ago.. and she was active in her local community. As well as here...(but I don't know her name then or now)

Anyhow...
I didn't want her to know who I am in the forums, but what if?

What if someone in your family found this site on their own, saw your picture next to a post, a post mind you discussing your sexual activities in the bedroom...

How would you feel? What would you do?

Post #: 1

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:02:00 AM

Twicehappy2x

Posts: 1096
Joined: 3/27/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GimpinDenial

What if someone in your family found this site on their own, saw your picture next to a post, a post mind you discussing your sexual activities in the bedroom...

How would you feel? What would you do?

Ummmm....nothing? But then again, my family, brothers, sisters, grown ums, etc, all know. Several of my siblings and one of my grown ums are into bdsm in one form or another so at worst i'd say hi.

_____________________________

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Post #: 2

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:04:17 AM

OldBastardly1

Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline

Me too.

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Post #: 3

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:04:44 AM

BossyShoeBitch

Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline

I have thought about that quite often actually.. Most of my family members know that I am a bit "left of center" in the relationship/intimacy area so if they found my posts here, I might be embarrassed, but much in the same way that I would be if they walked in on me having sex.. Nothing earth shattering...
I am quite proud of most of the pictures I have up on my profile, so I might ask them how they liked my pictures..

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to GimpinDenial)

Post #: 4

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:07:17 AM

FullCircle

Posts: 5713
Joined: 11/24/2005
Status: offline

Why would they be on the site in the first place?

I know this is a small world but I think there are other places they would rather be.

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(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)

Post #: 5

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:08:22 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

I'd be cool with it. Would be nice to know I'm not the ONLY freak in the family!

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Post #: 6

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:09:58 AM

lusciouslips19

Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline

Well I have in the past had profiles on more than one adult site. A couple years ago my father said he was perusing a website(ya know, fer fun) and came upon my profile. he said he couldnt remember the name of the site. I think he told my mom. She didnt mention it, he didnt make a great big deal about it. They have always known I was a little sex maniac. Well maybe thats why boys were never allowed in my bedroom but were allowed in my sisters.

Ya know, if they happen upon it, what are they doin there? AND its their own dang fault for being at such unseemly places, ya know?

_____________________________

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Post #: 7

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:10:29 AM

tigerlilies69

Posts: 4
Joined: 9/29/2005
Status: offline

i think the person i would be mainly concerned with would be my mother. not because she wouldn't get it, because she has always been very open with me and we are very close, but because she raised me to rely on no one and to make sure that i was always the one in control. as much as i love her, all that type of behavior did for me in relationships was completely frustrate me.

(in reply to GimpinDenial)

Post #: 8

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:12:06 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

I wouldn't *do* anything. I'm pretty sure that My family and friends are aware of the fact that I have sex. It's not like the UM's were a product of immaculate conception.

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Post #: 9

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:17:18 AM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

Having been in the music industry through the 80s, my more distant relatives are aware that I live an alternative lifestyle, they just don’t know which one exactly. How would I feel if they found out I was leather lifestyle instead of a stoned out musician? I guess I’d feel better if the knew I was living healthy.

As far as immediate family, nothing would change. My parents were alt lifestyle and I've been out since my teens.

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Post #: 10

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:24:14 AM

Poetryinpain

Posts: 341
Joined: 3/20/2008
Status: offline

My sister doesn't have a computer, so no worries there. My brother might be a little concerned - he's always been rather protective of his little sister, especially since I've become disabled. But I'd remind him that I'm an adult and tell him to mind his own business. Besides, I don't think he'd even dream of coming here.

My niece introduced me to BDSM and to CM. I think she still appears once in a while, maybe not in the forum, but she has an active profile (nope - not gonna tell what it is - that's up to her).

My parents are both gone, so no worries there, either.

pip, fairly safe

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(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 11

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:27:40 AM

backseatbebe

Posts: 195
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline

ok i dont understand
you talked enough about your sexual activities to this person for them to recomend this site
but now that youre here your scared to be you?
confused

as for family or friends finding me here, id wonder first of why they are here!!
id be more surpised about them coming onto the site than them thinking they outted me!!!

quote:

ORIGINAL: GimpinDenial

One of the reasons I decided to create this alter ego was this...

I have a relative that told me about Collar Me a loooong time ago.. and she was active in her local community. As well as here...(but I don't know her name then or now)

Anyhow...
I didn't want her to know who I am in the forums, but what if?

What if someone in your family found this site on their own, saw your picture next to a post, a post mind you discussing your sexual activities in the bedroom...

How would you feel? What would you do?

(in reply to GimpinDenial)

Post #: 12

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:28:51 AM

akisha

Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline

I would laff because chances are there would be one of two reactions when it comes to my family.

1. "Oh christ chelle do you really need to publicly advertise??"

or

2. "Wow nice to know i'm not the only wierdo in the family."

Well the third would be some would blush and have a hard time looking me in the eye until they got over it lol

I am who I am and I'm not ashamed at all. I have an open information policy with my friends and my family. If they want to know something I tell them. I gear explinations to minimalize shock value when talking to some family memebers. If they want to know more they are then given the choice to ask or not.

When my Dom came to visit me the first time, the only thing my mother said when I told her was "Make sure you have safe calls in place"

I love my family *S*

_____________________________

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Post #: 13

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:41:51 AM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GimpinDenial

One of the reasons I decided to create this alter ego was this...

I have a relative that told me about Collar Me a loooong time ago.. and she was active in her local community. As well as here...(but I don't know her name then or now)

Anyhow...
I didn't want her to know who I am in the forums, but what if?

What if someone in your family found this site on their own, saw your picture next to a post, a post mind you discussing your sexual activities in the bedroom...

How would you feel? What would you do?

Wouldn't it be cool if you have fucked her? It was some sort of an arrangement where she showed up and you were already blindfolded.....Neato shit, man.

_____________________________

(in reply to GimpinDenial)

Post #: 14

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:50:11 AM

GimpinDenial

Posts: 1145
Joined: 4/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy
Wouldn't it be cool if you have fucked her? It was some sort of an arrangement where she showed up and you were already blindfolded.....Neato shit, man.

Ok..this and a few other replies have instilled me to elaborate..

the relative was my mother, dude..and no...that wouldn't be cool..it would be seriously messed up, in my opinion...

If she saw my ACTUAL profile on here..she would know who I am right away.
(waves...hi mom....

)

quote:

ORIGINAL: backseatbebe
ok i dont understand
you talked enough about your sexual activities to this person for them to recomend this site
but now that youre here your scared to be you?
confused

We were (we have since lost touch) more like good freinds simply because we never really had that Mother/Son relationship....

As for being scared..no, just embarrassed; for her as well as for myself, for her to read some of my comments on certain subjects

We were open and honest about what we enjoyed, but we never discussed details like some I have spoken about here when I have been in "serious mode" as opposed to "goofy gimp" mode....

< Message edited by GimpinDenial -- 4/26/2008 9:58:28 AM >

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 15

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:51:08 AM

BossyShoeBitch

Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

quote:

ORIGINAL: GimpinDenial

One of the reasons I decided to create this alter ego was this...

I have a relative that told me about Collar Me a loooong time ago.. and she was active in her local community. As well as here...(but I don't know her name then or now)

Anyhow...
I didn't want her to know who I am in the forums, but what if?

What if someone in your family found this site on their own, saw your picture next to a post, a post mind you discussing your sexual activities in the bedroom...

How would you feel? What would you do?

Wouldn't it be cool if you have fucked her? It was some sort of an arrangement where she showed up and you were already blindfolded.....Neato shit, man.

Now why you gotta go and say that shit man? Cheeeese and riceeeeee!

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 16

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 9:55:46 AM

Sandyshores29718

Posts: 343
Joined: 4/8/2008
Status: offline

*quick post*

i wouldn't care. i've told my mom i'm into BDSM. lol Didnt mean to, but its done now. my aunt knows also...i really dont care.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)

Post #: 17

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 10:00:47 AM

kiwisub12

Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline

You don't want her to know because you don't want her to feel vindicated that she was right about your orientation? or because she would worry? What exactly is it that would bother you?

If she told you about CM then she has a fair idea that this is where you belong. Just don't talk to her about it. Or send her an email and tell her what your nickname is and ask her not to read any of your posts, because you would find it embarassing. That would work for me as a mother.

If any of my family found my profile on collarme i would assume that they were part of the lifestyle . It would be mildly embarassing, but so would talking about my sexlife if it was vanilla. It would actually be nice to talk about the nonsexual bits with someone i knew and trusted. It would give me someone to be the safecall person that i could completely trust without outing me to vanilla friends.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)

Post #: 18

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 10:01:01 AM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GimpinDenial

How would you feel? What would you do?

Well that is the thing. I have been found online Three times under Kinky Ailiases.

Twice they never asked anything about it and one time they freaked on me.

I simply asked them why they are looking around a site like this if they weren't interested and they said they thought we were all sick and demented and needed help.

I informed this friend that they had known me for years and was I sick and demented and did I need help. They said that they thought I did now if this was what I was into.

I said well I guess you have to make a decision on what you want to do. Stick around and learn a little about it or consider us all freaks, me included, and walk away with that belief.

He walked away.

It is hard losing friends but I think it is harder knowing you are lying to them. Because of this we are never "Vanilla" acting in public however being us does not require us to look like leather bonage bikers either so most people never know. We have had friends who notice and ask and the answer is always "This is what works for us" ands that 99.9% of the time stops the questions.

We don't have to get into Master slave however we have been asked flat out if that is what we are and we answer honestly. We also CHOOSE OUR FRIENDS WISELY THESE DAYS. I don't just have IDLE Friends everyone I associate with is a FRIEND because they have shown that they ARE A FRIEND.

The truth of the matter is some people just aren't okay with thier own Kink. If you aren;t that is okay but you know some of us are and coming out wasn't HALF as bad as you would expect.

Oddly enough of those I know who cam out to thier parents YES there was awkwardness and some anger, however, all said the same thing once they got over the initial shock the still loved me and tried NOT to judge. TRIED being the operative word.

Being an Adult I don't look to my parents for approval on everything I do. Now I look to myself to see if *I* approve of what I do. If I don't approve of it I DON'T DO IT.

Steel

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(in reply to GimpinDenial)

Post #: 19

RE: Outed on CM?.... - 4/26/2008 10:01:32 AM

FullCircle

Posts: 5713
Joined: 11/24/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

quote:

ORIGINAL: GimpinDenial
One of the reasons I decided to create this alter ego was this...
I have a relative that told me about Collar Me a loooong time ago.. and she was active in her local community. As well as here...(but I don't know her name then or now)
Anyhow...
I didn't want her to know who I am in the forums, but what if?
What if someone in your family found this site on their own, saw your picture next to a post, a post mind you discussing your sexual activities in the bedroom...
How would you feel? What would you do?

Wouldn't it be cool if you have fucked her? It was some sort of an arrangement where she showed up and you were already blindfolded.....Neato shit, man.

Now why you gotta go and say that shit man? Cheeeese and riceeeeee!

Wasn't there also a thread recently about faceless sex in a dark room?

_____________________________

∞ ﮒuקּƹɼ ƾɛϰưϫԼ Ƨωιϯϲћ.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)

Post #: 20

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