A useful sub?

A useful sub? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion

Message

Leatherist -> A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:22:35 AM)
Someone suggested having a submissive be useful was "abusive" to some schools of thought. Sort of like people who "hard limit" housework. Personally,if someone is living under my roof, I expect them to do thier share-it's not as if I do not do the same. Do you think a sub should be willing to work?

Floggings4You -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:25:42 AM)
If the person is living with you, then the relationship is 24/7. Thus, it seems to Me that you're referring to M/s, not D/s...

mistoferin -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:26:19 AM)
Are ya serious? On the chance that you really are.... Yes, emphatically! A person who does not carry their own load is dead weight.

mistoferin -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:27:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Floggings4You If the person is living with you, then the relationship is 24/7. Thus, it seems to Me that you're referring to M/s, not D/s... Huh?

Leatherist -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:27:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Floggings4You If the person is living with you, then the relationship is 24/7. Thus, it seems to Me that you're referring to M/s, not D/s... I would expect the same of a nilla-why should a sub get a free ride?

Leatherist -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:28:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mistoferin Are ya serious? On the chance that you really are.... Yes, emphatically! A person who does not carry their own load is dead weight. I'm serious,I have met women out there who think they can do "the story of O" and do nothing but have fun all day-can you say "parasite'?

mistoferin -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:29:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Leatherist quote: ORIGINAL: Floggings4You If the person is living with you, then the relationship is 24/7. Thus, it seems to Me that you're referring to M/s, not D/s... I would expect the same of a nilla-why should a sub get a free ride? Well I am trying to figure out how living together would define a relationship as M/s and not D/s.

Dnomyar -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:29:55 AM)
subs, slaves, Mistresses. Put them all to work.

mistoferin -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:30:35 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Leatherist I'm serious,I have met women out there who think they can do "the story of O" and do nothing but have fun all day-can you say "parasite'? I don't know where people like that come from....but I can tell you that they don't live here.

lusciouslips19 -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:30:53 AM)
But I'm just in it to be of sexual service! Seriously though, I am not big into housework and My Sir and I don't live together but when I come over sometimes I bring food, sometimes I cook. I help clean up and sometimes I've even cleaned his house like a maid as a way to say thank you for countless hours of help he has done for me. Thats a relationship. Thats what you do to make someone happy. You do for them whether D's or vanilla.

Floggings4You -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:33:15 AM)
I'm just trying to get a feel for the type of relationship being duscussed. Is the sub expected to work (as in, have a job), to be self-supporting, and help with household expenses? As most seem to agree, this is hardly unreasonable... quote: ORIGINAL: mistoferin quote: ORIGINAL: Leatherist quote: ORIGINAL: Floggings4You If the person is living with you, then the relationship is 24/7. Thus, it seems to Me that you're referring to M/s, not D/s... I would expect the same of a nilla-why should a sub get a free ride? Well I am trying to figure out how living together would define a relationship as M/s and not D/s.

missturbation -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:33:59 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Leatherist Someone suggested having a submissive be useful was "abusive" to some schools of thought. Depends in what way you mean useful. quote: Sort of like people who "hard limit" housework. Although not listed as a hard limit i don't do it. I wouldn't really even consider it if i'm honest. I have a cleaner who i pay to do it for me and would continue to do so if i was living with a partner. I earn my own money and always will so i will also always pay for said cleaner. I have far better things to do with my limited spare time than clean. quote: Personally,if someone is living under my roof, I expect them to do thier share-it's not as if I do not do the same. Do you think a sub should be willing to work? I do work and pretty hard at that. There are just some things i would rather not do though, like cleaning. I wouldnt expect my partner to do it though either.

Leatherist -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:34:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mistoferin quote: ORIGINAL: Leatherist I'm serious,I have met women out there who think they can do "the story of O" and do nothing but have fun all day-can you say "parasite'? I don't know where people like that come from....but I can tell you that they don't live here. There seem to be quite a few freeloaders who are using "lifestyle slave" as a cover to take advantage of gullible people.

RCdc -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:35:50 AM)
It's up to the people involved in a relationship. But - If anyone thinks that sexual submissives should do housework then you should also think that a no-strings service submissive should be having sex with you. I'd like to see that have wings... the.dark.

Leatherist -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:37:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark It's up to the people involved in a relationship. But - If anyone thinks that sexual submissives should do housework then you should also think that a no-strings service submissive should be having sex with you. I'd like to see that have wings... the.dark. I'm more eclectic than that-I don't specialize.

BeingChewsie -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:37:53 AM)
I think a submissive person who is owned or in service to a person with authority over them should be prepared to do whatever they are told to do..if it is work they are told to do, of course they should. Having said that..a dominant person gets exactly the submissive person or slave they deserve. quote: ORIGINAL: Leatherist Someone suggested having a submissive be useful was "abusive" to some schools of thought. Sort of like people who "hard limit" housework. Personally,if someone is living under my roof, I expect them to do thier share-it's not as if I do not do the same. Do you think a sub should be willing to work?

mistoferin -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:40:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Floggings4You I'm just trying to get a feel for the type of relationship being duscussed. Is the sub expected to work (as in, have a job), to be self-supporting, and help with household expenses? As most seem to agree, this is hardly unreasonable... Well I don't think it really matters if they are sub, slave or vanilla. I would expect adults to be adults and carry their own load. Now, that doesn't necessarily mean that they must have a job outside the home. Sometimes, rare times today, a couple can make it on one income. But I would expect the one staying at home would then be fully responsible for everything that needs to be done with the house and any other responsibilities such as children. I can't imagine a relationship of any kind where one person would get to stay home and lay around on the couch all day watching soaps, playing on the computer all day or being non-productive in general. It certainly wouldn't be a relationship that would appeal to me. I think that likely the type of person that Leatherist is referring to are the subs who think this is a great place to find someone who will take responsibility for them and their life.....and unfortunately there are far too many willing to do just that.

Leatherist -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:45:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mistoferin quote: ORIGINAL: Floggings4You I'm just trying to get a feel for the type of relationship being duscussed. Is the sub expected to work (as in, have a job), to be self-supporting, and help with household expenses? As most seem to agree, this is hardly unreasonable... Well I don't think it really matters if they are sub, slave or vanilla. I would expect adults to be adults and carry their own load. Now, that doesn't necessarily mean that they must have a job outside the home. Sometimes, rare times today, a couple can make it on one income. But I would expect the one staying at home would then be fully responsible for everything that needs to be done with the house and any other responsibilities such as children. I can't imagine a relationship of any kind where one person would get to stay home and lay around on the couch all day watching soaps, playing on the computer all day or being non-productive in general. It certainly wouldn't be a relationship that would appeal to me. I think that likely the type of person that Leatherist is referring to are the subs who think this is a great place to find someone who will take responsibility for them and their life.....and unfortunately there are far too many willing to do just that. I had one exactly like you described above-could not get her to hold down a job, and I was warned about her-but did not want to listen. I was in love with the idea of having a 24/7. My bad for being an idiot. I gave her chance after chance, and finally had to dismiss her-after she put me in the hole financially and emotionally.. I still remember her leaving in the cab. It was not long before she was with someone else-pulling the same shit.

NorthernGent -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:47:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Leatherist Someone suggested having a submissive be useful was "abusive" to some schools of thought. Sort of like people who "hard limit" housework. Personally,if someone is living under my roof, I expect them to do thier share-it's not as if I do not do the same. Do you think a sub should be willing to work? In the event she will not work, she needs to check into a hotel. Housework is not an issue with me - I can do that more than adequately. To be of value to me, she needs to bring that which I don't have - e.g. first class cooking skills. P.S. Picking and choosing?! What is it?......an audience with a submissive? "I'm in it for the sex, but not the work".............Of course you are, go and clean out the toilet. All or nothing!

RCdc -> RE: A useful sub? (5/23/2008 9:48:12 AM)
Being eclectic doesn't mean you do not specialise persay. And doesn't really make any sense to me in response. If you wish to enlighten me, please feel free. Relationships are all different. Not all s-types will be useful to you and do what you want. Usefulness comes in many ways. You want a s-type that does housework, works and is submissive in bed, you make it clear and go from there. I don't believe in one true ways of being submissive. the.dark.

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

4.492188E-02