RE: what makes a "true Dom"

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RE: what makes a "true Dom" - 9/2/2008 11:29:48 AM

JewAndCelt

Posts: 110
Joined: 8/23/2008
From: Arkansas
Status: offline

'True Dominants' are those who continuously stalk and harass, insisting that ALL submissives must bow to them and do the 'True Dominant's biddings. These peculiar individuals insist that any submissive'slave who does not submit to first meets, beatings, and sex are 'fake submissives'.

(in reply to subtee)

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RE: what makes a "true Dom" - 10/9/2008 5:44:14 PM

DavanKael

Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline

Solidity of character, honesty, honor, loyalty, and the ability to step up into a Dominant role.
Davan

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

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RE: what makes a "true Dom" - 10/9/2008 6:37:50 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DMFParadox

Very simply, a Dom is someone who is sexually stimulated by the demonstration of obedience by their partner.

There's more to it; there's skill in attaining and maintaining that obedience, for example, and sadism plays a role sometimes. But that's the simplest definition that I'd accept as completely true.

For someone to not be a 'true Dom', to me, would mean that person does not feel more sexual when being obeyed. Their heart's not in it. They want to be obeyed only because then they can use that obedience to attain sex; not for the sake of the obedience itself.

I am one who is quickly and visibly turned on by obedience and succor. Especially the unexpected, little victories, turn me on. That's why I identify as a Dom. I apologize for my earlier post, because I was analyzing the reasons why I think Doms exist; not what they are.

Regards, Paradox

Now this I disagree with. Besides it sets up the corollary that a sub is someone who is sexually aroused by being ordered around.

Do you get hot if you drive through McDonalds and order a Big Mac?
What if she doesn't get hot when you tell her to iron your blue shirt?

Besides all that, some of us are obedience wired and some aren't. For some, what does it for them is service, having someone come by and mow the lawn gets their dominant juices flowing. And then there are those of us whose switch is turned on by emotional transparency.

He would much rather have me strip myself nude and present to him my fears, my insecurities etc than have me go straight to doing what he says. Me giving him my authentic self, the self I keep hidden and protected, knowing he's the only one who ever gets that just flat out does it for him. And knowing he's the only one I can do this with while being 100 percent sure I am safe in so doing, is what does it for me.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to DMFParadox)

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RE: what makes a "true Dom" - 10/10/2008 7:53:29 AM

Barelily

Posts: 96
Joined: 10/8/2008
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Sweetie go here http://www.seekdiscipline.com/boards/dstopics/ it takes 7 days to be able to post or chat but the 24/7 board has soem good reading from Masters long in the lifestyle ...good luck

(in reply to subtee)

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RE: what makes a "true Dom" - 10/13/2008 11:43:48 AM

JewAndCelt

Posts: 110
Joined: 8/23/2008
From: Arkansas
Status: offline

I could prattle on about Honor and Integrity and such, but that, to me, is a steaming load of crap.

(insert prospective sub/slave name here)'s 'True Dom' is someone who could obviously do a better job than (insert prospective sub/slave name here)'s current Dom, who is obviously 'fake'. The 'True Dom' seems to be certain that s/he can somehow convince (insert prospective sub/slave name here) that s/he needs a 'more experienced' person to teach him/her about the lifestyle, by the clever use of complicated Boolean logic (hence the term TRUE Dom).

What it really amounts to is that some dimwit's just trying to get down yer britches.

_____________________________

Maturity is patience. Mastery is nine times patience.

!!!!!!כי לא נולד הבן זונה שיעצור את ישראל

(in reply to subtee)

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RE: what makes a "true Dom" - 10/13/2008 12:52:48 PM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
Now this I disagree with. Besides it sets up the corollary that a sub is someone who is sexually aroused by being ordered around.

Do you get hot if you drive through McDonalds and order a Big Mac?
What if she doesn't get hot when you tell her to iron your blue shirt?

Besides all that, some of us are obedience wired and some aren't. For some, what does it for them is service, having someone come by and mow the lawn gets their dominant juices flowing. And then there are those of us whose switch is turned on by emotional transparency.

He would much rather have me strip myself nude and present to him my fears, my insecurities etc than have me go straight to doing what he says. Me giving him my authentic self, the self I keep hidden and protected, knowing he's the only one who ever gets that just flat out does it for him. And knowing he's the only one I can do this with while being 100 percent sure I am safe in so doing, is what does it for me.

go go des!

Well, either that, or I'm not a "true dom". No worries, I can live with that. But after a recent bout of introspection, it's become pretty clear to me that controlling my wife presses some fairly significant buttons in me. But they aren't sexual in nature, nor are they as simple as a generic "power rush". I've come to think that, for me, it is simply it's own thing, not related to anything else.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to DesFIP)

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RE: what makes a "true Dom" - 10/13/2008 3:38:12 PM

lilmisssubmiss

Posts: 284
Joined: 9/29/2008
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every dom says your last dom wasn't a true dom...jesus they can't just respect eachother and see everyone is different *rolleyes*

HOWEVER the dom i'm with now i'm very impressed with...he never once said my other ex doms didn't know what they were doing he just sees his ways are different...FINALLY. lol someone whose mature.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

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RE: what makes a "true Dom" - 10/25/2008 6:30:45 AM

inkyskido

Posts: 4
Joined: 2/8/2008
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Based on my own experience, I believe a "Real Dom" may be someone who has a certain "energy/vibe", like one polarity of a magnet. When they meet a "real sub", the opposite polarity, both can feel a strong tangible pull/ a need to be with that person. So each is unmasked to the other.

I stumbled in to a D/s relationship based on this tangible pull/magnatism, neither of us knowing the others "true" nature, until thing unfolded. As it did, the intensity of the magnetism increased.

I suspect these "true dom's" may only be dominant in sex, and not other life aspects. In fact probably very unassuming. Whereas the "true sub's" I've "felt" have been powerful, charismatic and successful. Only subordinate when it comes to their sexual desires. Its like the sexual nature contrasts the rest of their personailty, to balance it.

I realise this may contradict the view of a "dom" being someone with a controlling character, but I know what I've personally experienced and I just want to share an alternate reality.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

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RE: what makes a "true Dom" - 10/26/2008 6:12:26 PM

astonct

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Joined: 10/22/2008
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A true dom? here's my 2 cents - There's a difference between "Seeing and Looking, Touching and Feeling, Talking and Listening, Hearing and Listening, Existing and...Living"..need I say more?

A

(in reply to Raziyalale)

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