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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/11/2008 1:04:03 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		I agree that tears are a sign of real emotion, and hopefully thereby, a real connection.  Who wouldn't want that?  I want to be emotionally available for my Lady, so tears are part of that connection for me and I accept that.

Well true, OS.  I see your point and I think you're dead right about that connection.  But are you able to cry - does it happen easily for you?


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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/16/2008 12:51:15 AM   
TeeGO


Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
Status: offline 		"Do you really want to hurt me
Do you really want to make me cry"


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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/16/2008 4:48:50 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Arrrgh!  I thought I was just about going to get away with starting a thread with that title without the Boy George song ever being mentioned! 

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/16/2008 4:52:01 AM   
JustDarkness


Posts: 1461
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline 		deleted
misread

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/16/2008 9:05:07 AM   
TeeGO


Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Arrrgh!  I thought I was just about going to get away with starting a thread with that title without the Boy George song ever being mentioned! 

I tried...I did...but just...couldn't...resist.

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/17/2008 3:13:41 PM   
world4penelope


Posts: 14
Joined: 8/17/2008
From: the world
Status: offline 		Yes! We love to see them cry! Well at least I do! I really enjoy seeing My subs weep. It makes Me hot for some inexplicable reason. Then there is the intimacy of stroking them as they whimper and soften. Then they play out that silly line from an old Madonna song. "only the one who hurts you can take it away..." Such a unique connection when it happens.

Regards,
Mistress Penelope St. Devi

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/17/2008 3:22:13 PM   
darchChylde


Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline 		I haven't cried from play or a beating, at least not the pain of it; but after a really good scene I tend to curl up on Ma'ams lap and sob.  She is very comforting and supportive when I do this (not to mention that She's very comfy to cuddle with *winks*).

Edited to add in a happy *sigh*.


< Message edited by darchChylde -- 10/17/2008 3:30:32 PM >

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/17/2008 5:10:26 PM   
shivermetimbers


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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I haven't cried for years and I bet many men would say the same. 


Geezus, I'm so sentimental, I cry at super market openings. 

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/17/2008 5:15:19 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		I bet that's more fantasy than reality, though, W4P.  I'd imagine it's quite rare for any woman to make any male cry - even if the man really, really wanted to cry.

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/17/2008 5:19:00 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Geezus, I'm so sentimental, I cry at super market openings. 

You jest, surely?!  It can't be that easy for your waterworks to flow?

Maybe it's just me, then - maybe I'm a hard, cold man . . . .

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/18/2008 1:24:55 AM   
shivermetimbers


Posts: 2060
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

You jest, surely?! 

I'm not jesting, and don't call me Shirley

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I love you Deanna, you make every day a better day.

If we descended from monkeys and apes, why are there still monkeys and apes?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ3CJi0Ih9s&feature=player_embedded

http://www.thebuccozone.com/piratesong.htm

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/18/2008 5:21:47 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		I promise never to call you Shirley, Shiver. That's probably my favourite joke from Airplane.  And I must commend you for having one of the best sub's Cme names I've ever seen. 

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/18/2008 5:42:18 AM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline 		I enjoy seeing a man show a touch of emotion or pain.... doesn't have to be blubbering with tears rolling down his face. 


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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/18/2008 6:22:08 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I am going to say that it depends on the context.  Depending on that, My answer varies.

I have a couple of folks who I've played with who have cried in release at the end of a scene.  When they cry, yes, I enjoy it.  That is a sign that the scene was good for them and it's brought the cathartic response that they need.  When this happens, I do go into nurture mode.  There's something about it that makes the aftercare more intimate.  I very much enjoy being the person who wipes the tears away, strokes the hair, and whispers to them.

The time I don't enjoy the tears is when it is linked to a punishment in some way.    Now, I don't punish often, but when I do, I'm pretty sure there are going to be tears involved.  The point of a punishment is to cause enough discomfort so that the transgression will not be repeated.  That means it's going to hurt, and not in a fun kind of way.  I'm not an emotional sadist.  The truth is, when I do punish, it most likely hurts Me as much as it does them, so I can't exactly say I enjoy it.


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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/18/2008 6:52:12 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		I think you and Ms Starlett were talking about two, or possibly three, different types of tears there, Lady P.  I can easily see what Ms S says, also what you say in your first paragraph.  Both are quite heart-warming to hear, for me, actually.

But:

The time I don't enjoy the tears is when it is linked to a punishment in some way.    Now, I don't punish often, but when I do, I'm pretty sure there are going to be tears involved.  The point of a punishment is to cause enough discomfort so that the transgression will not be repeated.  That means it's going to hurt, and not in a fun kind of way. 

Would that be crying from humiliation, or pain, or both?   I guess, for me in your sub's position, it'd be mostly the former.   I say that because I've been in the greatest pain after certain accidents and certainly cried then - but I'm talking of pain of the level of fractures in sports, and so on . . .


 
 



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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/18/2008 7:05:34 AM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I agree that tears are a sign of real emotion, and hopefully thereby, a real connection.  Who wouldn't want that?  I want to be emotionally available for my Lady, so tears are part of that connection for me and I accept that.

Well true, OS.  I see your point and I think you're dead right about that connection.  But are you able to cry - does it happen easily for you?



You know P, it depends on the circumstance, but yea I do cry more than most men might.   But I will say that I am just a tad (okay, a lot) girlie, and thus not a typical male and so maybe not the best weather vane for that assessment. 


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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/18/2008 7:20:17 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Gah!  I've realised I've not been honest.  I do cry, often - and sometimes embarrassingly so - when at the cinema and reading certain novels.  Well, one big, semi-suppressed sob, I suppose.  The biggest I can remember was when William Wallace discovered that the Bruce had betrayed him in Braveheart.

Do you know, though, Otters?  I've heard enough from you and others now to make me think it might actually be worth practising. 


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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/18/2008 7:22:20 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I think you and Ms Starlett were talking about two, or possibly three, different types of tears there, Lady P.  I can easily see what Ms S says, also what you say in your first paragraph.  Both are quite heart-warming to hear, for me, actually.



Would that be crying from humiliation, or pain, or both?   I guess, for me in your sub's position, it'd be mostly the former.   I say that because I've been in the greatest pain after certain accidents and certainly cried then - but I'm talking of pain of the level of fractures in sports, and so on . . .


Let Me see if I can explain this properly.  There are a couple of things that I have to point out.  My collared sub really doesn't get humiliated.  When I say he could walk naked on his leash down main street USA and not give a damn, it's the absolute truth.  I could put him in situations that would make a lot of folks cringe.  It doesn't effect him a bit.  The boy's too excited by shopping to care what the sales girl thinks about his asking if a strap on would be right for him and has never had an issue with anything I've asked of him within his limits.

Also, he's a pain slut.  Punishing him physically wouldn't do a thing.  My clip would probably like it and ask for more.

What he can't stand, is knowing he has disappointed Me or have a lack of contact with Me.  I tend to chose subs who have this in common.  It's usually something I only ever have to apply once.  I usually couple it with one way or another for the sub to focus on the disappointment they have caused, either by writing or some other action that makes them see how whatever they have done has effected Me emotionally.  To those who are genuinely submissive, who live to please their Dominant, knowing they have displeased can be a very useful tool.

It's honestly not something that I like to use.  I know it hurts certain submissives right to the core.  It  can be absolutely heartbreaking to them.  However, this is exactly what makes it effective, and why it only ever has to be used one time.




_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/18/2008 7:34:16 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		What he can't stand, is knowing he has disappointed Me or have a lack of contact with Me.  I tend to chose subs who have this in common.  It's usually something I only ever have to apply once.  I usually couple it with one way or another for the sub to focus on the disappointment they have caused, either by writing or some other action that makes them see how whatever they have done has effected Me emotionally.  To those who are genuinely submissive, who live to please their Dominant, knowing they have displeased can be a very useful tool.

It's honestly not something that I like to use.  I know it hurts certain submissives right to the core.  It  can be absolutely heartbreaking to them.  However, this is exactly what makes it effective, and why it only ever has to be used one time.

All that I can completely relate to.  Thanks for explaining that, Lady P.

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RE: Do Dommes really want to make subs cry? - 10/18/2008 3:47:17 PM   
SnowRanger


Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline 		Hello All,

I teared up recently when I saw a story about a girl with Downs Syndrome who was elected Homecoming Queen.  I tear up (and yet oddly smile a bit) when I hear of a former coworker's death.  I tear up when I hear Fanfare for the Comman Man.  I tear up when I read or hear Shakespear's Crispians Day speach (I get it).

I have yet to tear up because of a beating.  If that day comes you can bet the tears will be genuine.  I wouldn't win any machismo contests so I suppose that most none of you will find the event to be a particular thrill.  Still....

Stoicly,
Mike
SnowRanger


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