Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Set of rules...


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Set of rules... Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 1:37:23 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
Wouldn't work for me.

Re punishment: I challenge you to kneel for an hour even unbound, and then see if you can stand up by yourself afterwards. Beyond that the focus on ass being red says to me you are looking for excuses to punish because you enjoy making her ass red. I wouldn't trust you not to be punishing without reason just to get your rocks off. And if you propose to spank her on other occasions you might just find that she will hate it everytime because you've taught her to find all pain play emotionally distressing and not arousing.

Sex whenever. Nope, not if it's in public. You may not mind becoming a registered sex offender but she may. Not at home at all times either. Think she won't ever be sick? Demand this anyway while she's suffering and she'll figure you're too selfish to care about her needs.

Priority to you over her family? There was some guy last year who posted about what a bad sub he had because she refused to skip her grandfather's 80th birthday in order to accompany him to a barbecue.

The problem is that your rules don't allow for reality. They would go nicely in a piece of fiction.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to camille65)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 1:42:34 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
It shows you have much to learn and probably have very little RT experience. You should probably get some mentoring.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to RainydayNE)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 1:44:59 PM   
MsLadySue


Posts: 2254
Joined: 12/18/2004
Status: offline
"Submissive may choose whether to consent to or participate in activities prohibited by 
  federal, state, or local law"

Slavery (I know you call her a submisive) is illegal as is physical abuse ... spanking and whipping.



_____________________________

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.
I love it when someone insults me. That means I don't have to be nice anymore.

(in reply to Geoffozi)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 1:46:22 PM   
sexisubi


Posts: 373
Joined: 11/23/2008
Status: offline
A lot of these things can just be solved from conversations and dont need to be on this well written, however repetitive document.

For example i went out with a wonderful Dominant when i was dating who set expectations through conversations... like he said he wouldnt let a girl sleep in his bed unless she gave him oral in the morning, she could stay over on the floor but no in the bed. That even in public he is sir... things like that giving me exactly what he wants without putting it on paper i could assess what i should be doing and not be doing if i choose this path.

my Master actually said to me when i first moved in that He has the option to choose what i eat, and what excersises i do if need be. even though it's not in my rules.

Now lets talk about the document itself... there are times where it repeats itself... like freedom of thought is in at least two areas, conflict resolution is also in two areas, sir and master is in two or three areas.

the document also has areas that could be elimiated or relooked at... like jewelry or dress- even though one might think they look sexy and classy someone else might think they do not. remember that it is an honor to serve a Master-- one that should not be taken lightly... requiring jewelery or collars before full submission can bring less meaning to its importance... however that is personal opinion.

it says the submissives limits will be taken into consideration.. if it is a limit as always it should be respected by all parties. stretching boundries fine but limits... limits are there for a reason so one might want to keep that to themselves to not cause confusion.  

if the document was one page it would be better... using conversation to sway how one wishes for things to be conducted is a better idea then pushing everything on someone at once and putting 4 pages on ones bedroom wall can be a lot of pages. i think you have the right idea... just relook at the document and think 'what do I do differently then everyone else' and just stick with those concepts rather then the entire relationship.

good luck.  

_____________________________

bound by love,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIvvaqUdDm8

(in reply to Geoffozi)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 1:50:49 PM   
MsLadySue


Posts: 2254
Joined: 12/18/2004
Status: offline
I suspect you hit the nail on the head lusciouslips. This dominant is 25 and doesn't mention having any experience. I'm sure he will quickly realize his expectations are unrealistic once he has an opportunity to put them to the test.

_____________________________

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.
I love it when someone insults me. That means I don't have to be nice anymore.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 1:51:33 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Rules are made to be broken--always. The more rules you have the less obedience you will get.


That is absolute BULLSHIT!

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 1:55:27 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Rules are made to be broken--always. The more rules you have the less obedience you will get.


That is absolute BULLSHIT!


But how do you REALLY feel?

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 1:58:37 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

But how do you REALLY feel?


I would but... The stupidity that I see in this thread would get me band for life if I made any more comments.


AND  I am not in anyway referring to the OP either.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:00:43 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Rules are made to be broken--always. The more rules you have the less obedience you will get.


That is absolute BULLSHIT!

It's absolute reality, but that's really a different thread topic, now isn't it?

_____________________________



(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:04:03 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112
It's absolute reality, but that's really a different thread topic, now isn't it?


I suppose if your reality in nothing but a dellusion it would be accurate.  It's stupid statement of little value except for small minds.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:04:08 PM   
sexisubi


Posts: 373
Joined: 11/23/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112


quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Rules are made to be broken--always. The more rules you have the less obedience you will get.


That is absolute BULLSHIT!

It's absolute reality, but that's really a different thread topic, now isn't it?


*has a feeling this thread is about to get popular*

_____________________________

bound by love,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIvvaqUdDm8

(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:11:36 PM   
monywildcat


Posts: 452
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline
Wow.  I am all about lists, and I like bullet points, but on a resume.  This wouldn't work for me, then again, I didn't even make it through the whole list.  My eyes crossed after the whole "submissive can think what she wants". 

_____________________________

Major Life Change Necessitates Personal Reinvention...

(in reply to sexisubi)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:11:42 PM   
kittinSol


Posts: 16926
Status: offline
Judging from the crowd that's gathering up there at the entrance, I'd say you were correct  .

_____________________________



(in reply to sexisubi)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:13:04 PM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline
Well, on the face of it it looks like a list of lists........but there are loads of *rules* in my relationship that haven't been written but have become *known and imbibed* over time. These things always seem excessive when written in list form ........mine would do.

agirl



(in reply to Geoffozi)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:18:38 PM   
marie2


Posts: 1690
Joined: 11/4/2008
From: Jersey
Status: offline
In general, I enjoy rules.  But this list of yours has a lot of unrealistic expectations that seem fantasy-based.   Every submissive is different, and your relationship with one submissive might have a completely different chemistry than it does with another.  I think the best rules are the ones that you make specifically for the submissive as you get to know her, and as you see what is needed for her, and desired for yourself. 

(in reply to Geoffozi)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:23:50 PM   
MistressYes


Posts: 4
Joined: 6/17/2007
Status: offline
  .

< Message edited by MistressYes -- 12/3/2008 2:26:55 PM >

(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:26:37 PM   
lilmissdefiant


Posts: 666
Joined: 4/17/2008
Status: offline
To the OP
Your just asking for a potential submissive to bail on you.
Just a matter of interest, are you rich? can you afford not to work?
if You can then yes this is somewhat plausiable...otherwise...well I think there is a smidge of fantasy wandering around it.
Made me laugh
when did you expect to enforce all these rules....and something tells me you didn't take into account Aunt Flow


_____________________________

Change what you can and accept what you can't.
He came to me one night. Explored my body, licked, sucked, swallowed! When satisfied, he left & I was hurt!!... Fu*king mosquito!

Resident Thread Killer

(in reply to RainydayNE)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:26:49 PM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline
I only perused the list, and stopped when I read about vanilla issues being resolved without the influence of the D/s relationship. In my slavery to my former owner, there was no "vanilla." In other words, my slavery was all encompassing, and my dominant was the ruler of all aspects of my life.

In my current relationship, D/s still applies and we do not separate out "D/s" from "non-D/s". I am a whole being, who submits her being to another. What affects me affects all of me - I am not compartmentalized like that.

I see nothing wrong with writing your ideas out to keep them organized, but I personally do not separate D/s from non-D/s. I am all of me, in all facets of my life, and the person who dominates me dominates and/or influences all of it.

To each their own, of course...

_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to Geoffozi)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:32:44 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline
Honestly as a Dominant this is too many rules for me to keep up with. Now I am not into micromanagement but I know that others are. If you can keep up with all of this and find a submissive who is willing to do them, then go for it. But do not feel shocked if somewhere down the road you start striking some of these rules because your just too damned tired to enforce them all.

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to Geoffozi)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Set of rules... - 12/3/2008 2:36:34 PM   
atypicalsub


Posts: 284
Joined: 4/11/2008
From: an atypical sub
Status: offline
One thing Dom/mes with a lot of rules usualy over look the logistics of complying to all of them.  If you expect your sub to shave legs, maintain make up, and dress classy at all times you have to allow the sub at least a few hours every day to perform these activities.  So that means a few hours each day that your sub is not available to be serving you.  Then there is also the question of your sub having the money for the clothing and make up (it costs a lot more than men every believe).


_____________________________

Polyamorous, solitary eclectic pagan, pansexual slut, and personal pet of MistressYes

"Do not do anything you are ashamed of, and don't be ashamed of anything you do"
(although I'm sure my bio-family wishes I did less and was ashamed of more)


(in reply to NuevaVida)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Set of rules... Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094