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RE: hair - 12/30/2008 8:46:35 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

I think it's completely stupid to perform some serious act of symbolic submission to someone you've never met when you have so little experience.

But I've seen stupider things happen and work out great. I'd be happy to participate in the cutting.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to hopelesslyInvo)

Post #: 21

RE: hair - 12/30/2008 8:50:25 PM

SunnyTawse

Posts: 151
Joined: 11/17/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I'd be happy to participate in the cutting.

I'd be happy to participate in the beating...

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 22

RE: hair - 12/30/2008 8:50:49 PM

NormalOutside

Posts: 622
Joined: 1/8/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
I think it's completely stupid to perform some serious act of symbolic submission to someone you've never met when you have so little experience.

Very judgmental, as usual.

Personally, I don't think cutting your hair for someone else, especially someone you call Master, to be dangerous in any way. There may be danger in what it implies (what's next after cutting your hair off?) but assuming you know him and feel safe with him, it should be no more dangerous than paying a barber to do it.

_____________________________

I won't see your reply, because I don't use this account anymore.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 23

RE: hair - 12/30/2008 9:05:38 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

How can you know him if you've never met him? Her profile spells it out... he wants her to find someone to cut off her long hair, while he watches, and then he wants the cutter to beat her afterwards.

The haircutting is not in advance, it is at the first meeting, and even then, she won't "know" him.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to NormalOutside)

Post #: 24

RE: hair - 12/30/2008 9:06:37 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NormalOutside

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
I think it's completely stupid to perform some serious act of symbolic submission to someone you've never met when you have so little experience.

Very judgmental, as usual.

Personally, I don't think cutting your hair for someone else, especially someone you call Master, to be dangerous in any way. There may be danger in what it implies (what's next after cutting your hair off?) but assuming you know him and feel safe with him, it should be no more dangerous than paying a barber to do it.

Did I use the word "dangerous" in my post anywhere? No I really don't think I did....maybe my eyesight is finally going.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to NormalOutside)

Post #: 25

RE: hair - 12/30/2008 9:08:42 PM

DominaSmartass

Posts: 961
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NormalOutside

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
I think it's completely stupid to perform some serious act of symbolic submission to someone you've never met when you have so little experience.

Very judgmental, as usual.

Personally, I don't think cutting your hair for someone else, especially someone you call Master, to be dangerous in any way. There may be danger in what it implies (what's next after cutting your hair off?) but assuming you know him and feel safe with him, it should be no more dangerous than paying a barber to do it.

I rant like a crazy person and you call *her* judgemental? Lol...why don't I ever get any credit?

The thing about LA is that she'll call you stupid and then defend your right to be such. I will try tirelessly to talk or beat some sense into someone but it's really a lot more work.

_____________________________

“These S&M people ... they are bossy! There’s also a creepy connection between leather sex, ‘Star Trek’ and the Renaissance Faire.”

- Comedian Margaret Cho

(in reply to NormalOutside)

Post #: 26

RE: hair - 12/30/2008 9:20:03 PM

BRNaughtyAngel

Posts: 1821
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: hopelesslyInvo

eh... i just hope you happen to meet reality before you meet him, it's not fun to meet them both at once.

OMG, this made me laugh!

(in reply to hopelesslyInvo)

Post #: 27

RE: hair - 12/30/2008 9:24:39 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass
I rant like a crazy person and you call *her* judgemental? Lol...why don't I ever get any credit?

The thing about LA is that she'll call you stupid and then defend your right to be such. I will try tirelessly to talk or beat some sense into someone but it's really a lot more work.

LOL you're just too "confusing" to get a hold of ;)

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to DominaSmartass)

Post #: 28

RE: hair - 12/30/2008 9:41:19 PM

DominaSmartass

Posts: 961
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass
I rant like a crazy person and you call *her* judgemental? Lol...why don't I ever get any credit?

The thing about LA is that she'll call you stupid and then defend your right to be such. I will try tirelessly to talk or beat some sense into someone but it's really a lot more work.

LOL you're just too "confusing" to get a hold of ;)

And yet somehow you manage to comprehend me.

We should take this lovefest off the thread ;)

_____________________________

“These S&M people ... they are bossy! There’s also a creepy connection between leather sex, ‘Star Trek’ and the Renaissance Faire.”

- Comedian Margaret Cho

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 29

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 12:52:35 AM

BondageBarbieX

Posts: 495
Joined: 4/1/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: newleafintx

So my question to other Masters is two fold. First, is this an unusual or out of line request?
**Yes,he is wrong to try to get you to making you do this before a first meet.

Second , what is the consenses about my Master being dangerous based on this request?
**I do not know if he actually sounds dangerous ,more like he is being presumptuous and demanding.

In regards to the other Dom contacting you,unless you say in your profile for other Doms not to contact you I see that he did nothing wrong but for him to say bad things about your Dominant was tacky and wrong.

(in reply to newleafintx)

Post #: 30

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 1:07:34 AM

myotherself

Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline

To the OP I'd say...listen to the voices of experience you're hearing in this thread.

Right at the beginning it's really easy to fall for someone online - we've all done it. Only rarely does reality mesh with the fantasy we've woven in our minds.

Right at the beginning it's also really easy to accept that a Master's word is law. It's not, at least until you've met, talked and agreed the basic rules for the relationship. There are loads who'll do the 'no panties, short skirt' crap...others who'll tell you to go take your bra off...*insert super-fast eye-roll here*. After a lot of painful experience I've learned to take control for the first couple of meets at least. If we get on, then he gets to take over. If we don't, then I'm safe and lost nothing but a little bit of time.

If anyone told me that our first play would involve me having my hair cut off and then being beaten by the hairdresser, I'd say absolutely not! Why can't HE beat you, if he's so domly? Why does he need someone else to do it for him? And what happens if, after a few meets, he decides you're not suited? He's had his fun, you're left looking like the after-effects of a bad lice infestation.

But hey, YKINMKBIOK and all that stuff!

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk

(in reply to BondageBarbieX)

Post #: 31

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 2:37:18 AM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: scottishjason
As to your second problem, every dom who calls himself a master knows that you do not talk so someone else’s sub or slave with out his or her direct permission. So this guy who you are talking too is most likely not who he says he is.

Hmm... guess Val is a wanna be (or everyone in the local scene and tons on this board are) cause I talk to tons of people without his direct permission. So clearly, it's not a every master knows this thing.

Onto the OP - I gotta agree with LA. It's probably a stupid thing to do. But, if it's what you want to do, don't let the fact that it's stupid stop you. Quite frankly, and as I've said before, Valyraen and I getting together when we did was beyond stupid. It was moronic. My fiancee had just broken up with me (literally less than 24 hours). Now it's three years later and we're planning our wedding.

The hair will grow back but think carefully about one thing: If things don't work out, and most relationships don't, how will it affect you when you look in the mirror and see the change? Will it be positive or negative?

I wish you the best and it's something that I'd also interested in helping with. Sadly, when I try to cut hair it's a hairdon't, not hairdo. (Oh yes... I went there...

)

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to scottishjason)

Post #: 32

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 2:49:21 AM

BondageBarbieX

Posts: 495
Joined: 4/1/2008
Status: offline

Well that did not post right....bad blonde moment

ORIGINAL: newleafintx

So my question to other Masters is two fold. First, is this an unusual or out of line request?
**Yes,he is wrong to try to get you to making you do this before a first meet.

Second , what is the consenses about my Master being dangerous based on this request?
**I do not know if he actually sounds dangerous ,more like he is being presumptuous and demanding.

In regards to the other Dom contacting you,unless you say in your profile for other Doms not to contact you I see that he did nothing wrong but for him to say bad things about your Dominant was tacky and wrong.

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 33

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 6:30:12 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

I don't think it is appropriate to demand stuff of someone you haven't met. For all you know, this dude may well be a young punk living in his mother's basement and never intending to meet you. Even if he's for real, he could well turn out to be a dead ringer for the creepy guy who lived down the street when you were young. There are all kinds of snags that could preclude you from accepting him as your dominant in real life.

The sheer fact that he is demanding stuff without first manning up and meeting you says to me he isn't someone I would ever trust.

As far as male number two goes, why were you talking to someone when you are theoretically committed? Beyond that he's both right and wrong. He's right to caution you not to do all this stuff for someone you've never met, who shouldn't be pushing you this far and this fast. He's wrong to come sniffing about a woman who is already taken. However, he may well consider that you aren't involved simply because you've never met this man. For a lot of us, cyber only isn't real.

Me? I'd tell 'master' that I have a hard limit of not doing anything to prove myself a real slave until after he's proven himself to be a real master. Meaning a shared real time history together that demonstrates clearly to me he's more interested in my well being than to wanking about strange women shaving their heads at his say so.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to hopelesslyInvo)

Post #: 34

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 6:43:06 AM

mc1234

Posts: 683
Joined: 10/4/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

The hair will grow back but think carefully about one thing: If things don't work out, and most relationships don't, how will it affect you when you look in the mirror and see the change? Will it be positive or negative?

This is a great point - in one experience I've had, after one playdate both the dom and I knew it wasn't going to work out, and I *hated* seeing the marks he'd left behind until the bruises healed. And that wasn't anything like having to look at my shorn head in the mirror.

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 35

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 6:47:29 AM

Aneirin

Posts: 6121
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Tamaris
Status: offline

Nope, my hair is a hard limit for me, it does not get tampered with, and cutting it, is a deal breaker, those whom I come into contact with, know that.

_____________________________

Everything we are is the result of what we have thought, the mind is everything, what we think, we become - Guatama Buddha

Conservatism is distrust of people tempered by fear - William Gladstone

(in reply to mc1234)

Post #: 36

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 6:49:21 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Not to mention if she interacts with the public a shaved head may well not be appreciated at her job. How many people would be willing to hire a female real estate lawyer with a shaved head? If this isn't a classic example of sub frenzy I don't know what is.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to mc1234)

Post #: 37

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 6:52:27 AM

mc1234

Posts: 683
Joined: 10/4/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
If this isn't a classic example of sub frenzy I don't know what is.

Yep, I agree.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 38

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 7:57:14 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

Well she said "very short" not shaved, and there is a difference. As well, it depends on the job, is she actually job searching right now? A scarf or a hat can take care of most issues without a problem.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to mc1234)

Post #: 39

RE: hair - 12/31/2008 8:04:27 AM

alandraofMists

Posts: 187
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: newleafintx

Thank you for the fast replies. In all honesty the first reply is the one I was looking for, just did not know it till I read it. That is how I feel so I will stop obsessing about this and get on with it. As for the second reply , thank you, it seems a lot of people have strong opinions about hair length. He does not want me to cut it BEFORE we meet, but our first scene together is to go get it cut. I know deep in my heart that even if this does not work out my hair will grow back. Thanks loads. I feel much better. A new slave.

I am unclear if you will be meeting him before the first scene or if the first time you meet will be your first scene?

To my understanding, he wants you to find some one who is willing to cut your hair really short and then beat you so he can watch all this? Why could he not want to do this himself?

The thought of having my hair cut short does not bother me... I have shaved my hair down to an inch and watched it grow back.... I personally do not see how asking someone to cut there hair short could be considered dangerous....Asking someone to agree to scene at the first meet, does make me nervous and makes me question the safety of the Dom. Deciding at the first meet to move into a scene does not make me question the Dom or sub that means there is a connection there that has been confirmed by the meeting.

There is no true way to see if someone is dangerous or not... one has to follow common safety procedures like any other blind date.... leave someone with the knowledge of where you are, with whom you are, and when to expect you back.... and have a safe call in place for that first meet, don't do anything that you feel unsafe about.

Think about what you would want other family members to do to keep themself safe if they where in your shoes and doing what you are doing. You are the best judge for who and what the guy is.... but do not let your craving for being a slave override your responciblities to yourself and your family.

Knight's Alandra

edited for spelling

< Message edited by alandraofMists -- 12/31/2008 8:07:02 AM >

(in reply to newleafintx)

Post #: 40

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