RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious?

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RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/15/2009 7:24:54 PM

DrkJourney

Posts: 1917
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline

I'm all for people having their own fetish, and to each his own, etc., but when they want me to do something that impacts me as well, either financially or legally, I have an issue..lol

I wonder sometimes. I get some really strange requests....had several that want me to come to where ever they happen to be and kidnap them, I mean really grab them as they come out of the house or whatever, put them in a car, and I suppose throw them on a plane, and bring them to my home. (ok, I"m not barbie, but I doubt I could pull this off..lol) Of course they are going to "square" it with the authorities when their families sic the cops on me...lol (tonight on America's Most Wanted.....)....lol

Then of course the no limits people...and my favs the ones that want to stay in my home 24/7 and caged when I'm not using them.

Sometimes I try to talk to these people, reasonably, and let them know the ramifications of what they seek, but they are usually so far gone it's useless. Then you have to get the "you're not a real Domme" tirade because I'm not into what they are into.

So basically, I just smile, nod, and give a polite no thank you and move on with my life

_____________________________

...Look into my eyes and I'll own you....

(in reply to CatdeMedici)

Post #: 41

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/15/2009 8:19:30 PM

Loliita

Posts: 69
Joined: 1/15/2009
Status: offline

You make a good point.

I just got here and some of my messages make me say the same thing..."Are you f**king kidding me?"...Ok, it's the the exact same as "Are you serious?" but it means the same. I don't think some people separate reality from fantasy too well.

When I was in high school I had a fantasy about seducing one of my teachers and I knew I could but I also knew it could ruin both our lives so I didn't go through with it. I would just "play pretend" domme by asking the teacher to hand me a pencil in a very demanding way. I did once get him to up one of my test scores but that's as far as I went. I often think of going back to Lancaster and tracking him down and seeing what I could do with him. I feel so devious sometimes. :-O

(in reply to CatdeMedici)

Post #: 42

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/15/2009 8:26:14 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Loliita
I often think of going back to Lancaster and tracking him down and seeing what I could do with him.

Would that be Lancaster, Pennsylvania? Because now, you are on the Jersey Shore. You're not the first young blonde female dominant profile to be connected to that geographic combination.

Enjoy your time on the site.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to Loliita)

Post #: 43

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/15/2009 8:29:17 PM

graceadieu

Posts: 1518
Joined: 3/20/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline

I tend to just roll my eyes and move on to the next profile, and maybe laugh about it with somebody (a girl that wanted to live as a dog 24/7 is a recent example).

Re: the being chained up 24/7 in the basement discussion - a human being needs sunlight, exercise, and mental stimulation. How would a sub get that if they spend all of their life chained to a wall in a basement?

(in reply to Loliita)

Post #: 44

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/15/2009 8:35:31 PM

Loliita

Posts: 69
Joined: 1/15/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: Loliita
I often think of going back to Lancaster and tracking him down and seeing what I could do with him.

Would that be Lancaster, Pennsylvania? Because now, you are on the Jersey Shore. You're not the first young blonde female dominant profile to be connected to that geographic combination.

Enjoy your time on the site.

I was born and raised in Lancaster Pa. but now I work in Atlantic City. I am NOT a pro domme, I work a regular job. Ventnor, where I live, is on the same island and borders Atlantic City.

I imagine there are many pro dominants in and around Atlantic City for obvious reasons.

< Message edited by Loliita -- 1/15/2009 8:36:43 PM >

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 45

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/15/2009 8:44:42 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
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I didn't mean to imply you were a pro. There were a few profiles a while back -- and the people operating them outed themselves as "message board trolls" -- that were based in PA and outside Atlantic City. They prided themselves on being a "bitch."

I don't intend any insult to you. I just thought it was an interesting coincidence.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to Loliita)

Post #: 46

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/15/2009 8:56:13 PM

Loliita

Posts: 69
Joined: 1/15/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

I didn't mean to imply you were a pro. There were a few profiles a while back -- and the people operating them outed themselves as "message board trolls" -- that were based in PA and outside Atlantic City. They prided themselves on being a "bitch."

I don't intend any insult to you. I just thought it was an interesting coincidence.

Well, I don't consider myself a bitch or a troll

I didn't think you were implying I was a troll, no offense taken. I just wanted others not to think I was a pro when I mentioned I worked in AC. Usually if you hear AC and Dominant in the same sentence it implies pro.

As for the coincidence. I don't really see much of one. Pa is a large state and probably has a lot of dominant women. I see that Philadelphia has a large bdsm scene if their daily papers and google are to be believed.
Atlantic City also has it's own kink scene although I imagine it's mostly all pros.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 47

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/15/2009 9:54:16 PM

HalfShyHalfWild

Posts: 150
Joined: 2/11/2008
From: Texas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici

This is I guess a spin off from Tress's post about fantasy to reality--do you find that when you see things in a profile, you just HAVE to write and say--are you serious?? Now I am sure the purists will say---YKINMK and leave it alone---but don't you just wonder?

Like severe ball busting: I mean good news its a fantasy that can become reality--bad news is it may be a life altering onetime thing.

Want to be neutered--ok what makes a reasonably intelligent man think that is going to attract someone?

Want to have no will, no rights, no decisions, be left chained in the basement 24/7 ok is this even possible in reality for the majority?

Have you ever written or conversed with these kind of extreme ( this is My word and no one elses and is a generalization on My part, I admit it) individuals? How far did it go? What was their reasoning? I am sure we all assume its the shock factor--but there seem to me more and more and more and I have to wonder..

Are you serious?

This is a very interesting question. I have to say, when I first came here a few years to try the site out, I had more serious fantasies I guess? Absolute ownership, no rights, all that.

Took awhile to figure out that will always be a fantasy for me. Always.

The reality, heck, I didn't even get close to full reality and did not like, at all.

And... like I said... took me awhile to get it that it wasn't the men I was talking to or seeing, but me.

That being said, it was so damn freeing when that realization came. Like being let out of a box.

Looking back, I don't know why I was so focused on that, maybe because I'm a bit of a late bloomer though, and had those thoughts for as long as I can remember. Finding this place was like letting a kid loose in a candy store already hopped up from her birthday cake.

edited for typos

< Message edited by HalfShyHalfWild -- 1/15/2009 9:56:03 PM >

(in reply to CatdeMedici)

Post #: 48

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 4:09:35 AM

bamagirl4u

Posts: 151
Joined: 12/25/2008
Status: offline

I think to let sexual "fantasies" run wild is fine...but most of mine could never be incorporated in my real life. It is just my mind seeing how perverse I can get sometimes, but if it were applied to r/l it wouldn't work. Sometimes you have to be careful what you "wish" for. I believe in being safe, sane, and consensual but I also try not to judge anyone else and what their kink is. As an adult, you should know your limits and what you want and expect. There are some things I have tried, didn't like, and I won't try them again. On the other hand, some things I loved and would easily be compelled to beg for them. I delete most of the emails I receive on here because after reading them, I feel a little sickly...lol...but a handful of them certainly peak this girls interest.

_____________________________

~Don't settle for the One you can live with~~Wait for the One you can't live without.~
~To thine own self be true~~no compromise.~

(in reply to SummerMagpie)

Post #: 49

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 5:00:04 AM

MissMorrigan

Posts: 2309
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline

And I think that's an important point to note, Bamagirl, regarding 'no limits'. People tend to seek others in whom they share core principal/moral compatability, so they consider themselves to have 'no limits' with their partner/s.

Most people recognise bizarre requests such as castration, limb/breast amputation and eternal imprisonment for what they are - a fantasy du jour.

There will always be kinks that aren't compatable with other people's, which provide that knee jerk reaction especially with the more invasive kinks such as urethral sounds, needleplay and enemas, and I've received the odd email myself from people who have referred to me as a 'sick bitch' that clearly needs psychiatric treatment and it's people like me who keep a negative spotlight on BDSM. It's not me that keeps the negative spotlight on BDSM, it's those that care little for the wellbeing of those they play with, who are generally inexperienced and think they know it all just b/c they read the theoretical online.

And quite often I receive emails from people who share similar interests/experiences and would like to discuss them further - and mutual interests become fulfilling realities.

_____________________________

The Tooth Fairy who teaches kids to sell body parts for money.

A free society is a society where it is safe to find one's self unpopular and where history has shown that exceptions are not that exceptional.

(in reply to bamagirl4u)

Post #: 50

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 8:49:30 AM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NCNutCase

Want to have no will, no rights, no decisions, be left chained in the basement 24/7 ok is this even possible in reality for the majority?

When I read that simple quote, in this conversation, and do not omit any part of it...

Having no 'will, right or decision' signifies the 'slave' being represented would not be allowed to tap out. The 'slave being "left" removes the opportunity for a caring Dom to tap out on her behalf...

Yes it means the slave cannot tap out. It does not however remove the Dom's opportunity to tap out on her behalf. He still has his will, his rights and the right to make decisions. If he feels he should remove her from the situation he can.

quote:

In my very first post in this thread I clearly said I see opportunity to offer a washed down version of this safely... and in your above arguments your saying that a caring Dom could wash down the original quote safely... I'm glad we can agree...

The Dom being able to remove her from this situation does not wash it down at all. Just as in any scene he has the power to stop it if he feels the need. The slave still has no rights etc in this scenario.

quote:

The topic of this thread is questinoing the desire/request of fanatical extremes. I think most people who request such extremes are not thinking their fantasies all the way through to practical application. Let's just hope that the people they find are willing to think on their behalf.

No i disagree. This thread is just another thread on judging other peoples kinks.

quote:

I also think that people presenting such fanatical ideas as casual desires create unnecessary opportunity for judgement to healthy people investigating the lifestyle either of personal interest or 'spying' for whatever reason.

Here you go again implying that anyone who wants to do anything you believe is extreme is unstable. What about the other side of the coin where people who are considering trying something a bit more extreme are put off asking for advice / others experience of these things because people like you are so judgemental?

quote:

I've done 24 hour suspension, left girls chained to a wall overnight, locked in a closet for hours on end, beat them until bloody (although I didn't care for the bleeding), etc, etc... but permanently (suggested by using the word "left") removing any "will, right or decision" is a fanasty based extreme... if the Dom involved allows the fantasy, of absolute removal of "will, right or decision", then I'm sure the scene could go wonderfully for both parties...

Its not a fantasy based extreme at all. I was involved in an 18 month relationship where i had no will, rights and never made a decision. It wasn't extreme in my book, it was all based on rack and i am just as healthy and mentally stable as i was before i went into it.

quote:

My arguement here is against the fanatical extremes, not our ability to create the illusion of such an extreme for mutual pleasures/benefits...

Your illusion is someone elses reality. There are people who CHOOSE to live to the extremes and just because you can only fantasise about them doesn't mean it is the same for others.

quote:

Is there anyone here who has a 'slave' that would completely ignore her/him if she/he sincerely needed/wanted out of the relationship? If you recognise that request/desire/need then you are honoring his/her "will, right or decision"...

I'm pretty sure there will be.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to NCNutCase)

Post #: 51

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 9:20:02 AM

NCNutCase

Posts: 129
Joined: 2/2/2005
Status: offline

if the Dom taps out on her behalf... she wasn't "left in the basement" which means the original quote is washed down...

beyond that I can agree we disagree... it's not worth the arguement...

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 52

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 9:25:56 AM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NCNutCase

if the Dom taps out on her behalf... she wasn't "left in the basement" which means the original quote is washed down...

beyond that I can agree we disagree... it's not worth the arguement...

How on earth do you come to that conclusion?

So if im being whipped and the Dom taps out for my safety, i wasn't really whipped?

Go figure

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to NCNutCase)

Post #: 53

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 9:32:34 AM

NCNutCase

Posts: 129
Joined: 2/2/2005
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The original quote clearly stated "left in the basement"... if you ignore the word "left" you are watering down the original quote...

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 54

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 9:37:49 AM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
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So you are talking about leaving someone in a basement and never checking they are ok? Never taking them food? Never taking them water? Well that wasn't stated in the op and i think anyone who follows rack or ssc would make sure the person 'left' in the basement was ok.
A baby monitor, video camera, web cam monitoring them would be sufficent along with the taking of food and water, well thats three times a day they are going to be checked on.
I agree that to just leave someone in the basement unfed, unchecked on is insane but who other than someone with a death wish is going to agree to that?

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to NCNutCase)

Post #: 55

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 10:41:07 AM

NCNutCase

Posts: 129
Joined: 2/2/2005
Status: offline

No one except you has mentioned leaving them unfed or unchecked on... but in the original quote, the only one I'm interested in discussing, it is stated without will right or decision... and being left...

It is very possible to leave them in the basement without will, right or decision and still feed them and otherwise keep them alive... it was mentioned by someone earlier here that without sunlight and excercise that person would not be able to be kept healthy. Common sense says that psychological trouble is sure to happen. So this would leave them alive, yet in mentally and physically harmful conditions... and if they are "left" there this is obviously not a healthy relationship...

Diluting the situation could make it a complete different situation, which in my very first post here I agreed could be done in a way to make this a good tmie for all parties invovled...

:-)

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 56

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 10:51:48 AM

hardbodysub

Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
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Geez, I think you were too polite in using the word "serious" in the title. Seems like it should say "I feel compelled to ask, are you f***in' NUTS?"

(in reply to CatdeMedici)

Post #: 57

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 11:02:57 AM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

quote:

No one except you has mentioned leaving them unfed or unchecked on... but in the original quote, the only one I'm interested in discussing, it is stated without will right or decision... and being left...

It is very possible to leave them in the basement without will, right or decision and still feed them and otherwise keep them alive... it was mentioned by someone earlier here that without sunlight and excercise that person would not be able to be kept healthy. Common sense says that psychological trouble is sure to happen. So this would leave them alive, yet in mentally and physically harmful conditions... and if they are "left" there this is obviously not a healthy relationship...

Diluting the situation could make it a complete different situation, which in my very first post here I agreed could be done in a way to make this a good tmie for all parties invovled...

:-)

Which leads me back to my original questions. Who are you to judge what others choose to do? Who are you to decide what is sane and what is insane?
No doubt you will ignore my questions now just as you did earlier and have since with others i have asked.

If someone chooses to leave someone in a cellar and both are aware of the risks and consent it is their business, noone elses.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to NCNutCase)

Post #: 58

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 2:18:48 PM

BondageBarbieX

Posts: 495
Joined: 4/1/2008
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Yes,I have conversed with a lot of these types and I do not judge... I have helped quite a few of them with their individual needs.

(in reply to CatdeMedici)

Post #: 59

RE: I feel compelled to ask, are you serious? - 1/16/2009 3:01:53 PM

NCNutCase

Posts: 129
Joined: 2/2/2005
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I'm glad you made the other thread to allow us to continue our related tangent without clogging up this thread :-)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation
Which leads me back to my original questions. Who are you to judge what others choose to do? Who are you to decide what is sane and what is insane?

I'm simply some (fairly) level headed guy with a handful of experience in both SM and psychology... and in direct response to the topic of this thread, when I see requests I consider too extreme, I simply move on. But when the topic of discussing these extremes comes up I'm willing to offer my perspective. That's not judging, it's sharing... which is what these forums are for (I think?)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation
No doubt you will ignore my questions now just as you did earlier and have since with others i have asked.

Sorry if I didn't follow your exact line of questioning. I think I responded to the questions I felt were directed toward me on the subject, but yes I skipped a few when the quote was altered and simply tried to pull the conversation back to the original quote.

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation
If someone chooses to leave someone in a cellar and both are aware of the risks and consent it is their business, noone elses.

But in this thread the topic is discussing the idea of extreme requests where it seems (to some) the related risks have not been properly considered. I'm one who is not willing to risk someones long term best interests simply because they were dumb enough to ask me to. Having a conscious gets in the way of my twisted mind quite often...

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 60

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