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Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 5:12:06 AM   
Hammerlove


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Joined: 3/12/2009
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I can only speak for myself. I realize as a male I am driven by my passions and need to serve A Woman in the manner she requires. It is understood in order to maintain a level of the slave mindset that taking control of a man's harmones. When I release, the level of my enslaved mindset diminishes somewhat, until nature reloads me! My driving passion to serve is fueled by the hope that Mistress will allow me the fetishes that she knows I crave. Like rewarding a dog that obeys.
Naturally in the male's fantacy land I see photo's and vid's of female domination, catering to the male Phyche.
My question to the Superior Gender, what is in the Female Phsyche with regards to male slavery? What is your needs from a slave? Sexual pleasures, discipline, whippings, obedients, fetishes. Do you believe that all the cooking, housekeeping, laundry, erronds, and personal service given to Mistress is deserving for a slave's rewards? I am trained to be pampering and domestic. Without say or provisions for my fetish needs and sexual gratification. I would like to know if I am wrong in my thinking.
Respectfully:
hammer
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 5:33:52 AM   
DarkSteven


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hammerlove

My driving passion to serve is fueled by the hope that Mistress will allow me the fetishes that she knows I crave. Like rewarding a dog that obeys.

.........................

Do you believe that all the cooking, housekeeping, laundry, erronds, and personal service given to Mistress is deserving for a slave's rewards? 


Nope.  You're not a slave.

A slave is driven by the desire to serve and make another happy. You have some fetishes and hope to earn them through acting like a slave.  The selfless aspect is not there.




_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to Hammerlove)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 6:04:20 AM   
LadyConstanze


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hammerlove

My driving passion to serve is fueled by the hope that Mistress will allow me the fetishes that she knows I crave. Like rewarding a dog that obeys.

.........................

Do you believe that all the cooking, housekeeping, laundry, erronds, and personal service given to Mistress is deserving for a slave's rewards? 


Nope.  You're not a slave.

A slave is driven by the desire to serve and make another happy. You have some fetishes and hope to earn them through acting like a slave.  The selfless aspect is not there.





Agreed, but if somebody makes clear that it is some sort of trade-off, it's honest and up to the person to decide it is for her or not.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to DarkSteven)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 6:24:28 AM   
DarkSteven


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Good point, LC.  I may be getting rigid in my advanced years.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 6:40:35 AM   
LadyConstanze


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Joined: 2/18/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Good point, LC.  I may be getting rigid in my advanced years.


I thought I was getting more mellow (not quite ready to break out the knitting needles and have the rocking chair, though) until I got this "divine" email exchange that culminated in a sub who told me in the most snifflling tones where I could purchase equipment he likes, rent a hotel room that is convenient for him, how to greet him, whack him, do this that and the other in a certain manner as it is important for him that to show my enjoyment in a certain way. I politely declined and suggested that he might want to take his script to a pro-domme. The result was amazing, gone was the groveling, sniffling and replaced by informing me that there are millions like me out there, how dare I take such an attitude, blah blah.

As a sign of my mellow old age, I politely wished him good luck, suggested he checks the ratio of female dommes to male subs as it might be a bit of an eye opener and thanked him for showing me his real face, before using the blessed "block sender" function.

I must be getting old....

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to DarkSteven)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 7:00:03 AM   
BoiJen


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DS,

I might say that as MsKitty's boi and servant, that I HOPE to get my fetishes met. This ain't quid pro quo and even if I did hire the Ma'am for a session prior to our relationship...it still ain't quid pro quo. She's clear...someone pays Her to dominate them...not to have a scrip dictated to Her.

As a servant, I serve and am sometimes rewarded with fetishes of my desire, sex, other fun kinds of play, and if She's not in the mood I get told I can cuddle Her. I'm often a happy boi, even if I am broke. I don't come to the table expecting things, but the hope to get them is often a driving force.

Hoping that makes sense.

boi
future ruler of the Universe serving MsKitty
Silently plotting the revenge of the swine


_____________________________


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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 7:21:58 AM   
MsDDom


Posts: 368
Joined: 1/1/2009
From: GA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hammerlove

My driving passion to serve is fueled by the hope that Mistress will allow me the fetishes that she knows I crave. Like rewarding a dog that obeys.

.........................

Do you believe that all the cooking, housekeeping, laundry, erronds, and personal service given to Mistress is deserving for a slave's rewards? 


Nope.  You're not a slave.

A slave is driven by the desire to serve and make another happy. You have some fetishes and hope to earn them through acting like a slave.  The selfless aspect is not there.


yeah!

I think many submissives have the wrong view about being a slave. Being a "slave" to your fetish may create the desire to submit, but is not close to being a slave to a Mistress.


_____________________________

...:: MsDDom ::...

... live Life honestly ...

(in reply to DarkSteven)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 7:24:25 AM   
gentlemanprince


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Joined: 5/19/2008
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It seems to me that the problem is looking at things in terms of kinks such as play and service rather than as a relationship between two mature people who genuinely like each other as people.  Yes, I would never stay in a relationship in which my needs aren't being met.  I am not driven simply by a need to serve.  By the same token, I am not driven simply by my owm sexual desires.  I happen to love a woman who is extremely assertive and accept her leadership role.  But she loves me, too, and has the need to make me happy, too.

Hammerlove, I can only suggest that you put thoughts of whether you are a slave on the back burner along with your sexual desires and your service.  Find out if you really like this woman as a person, not as an idealize Domme.  If you do - and she likes you as a man - then you have plenty of time to add the bdsm elements to the relationship.

Good luck.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 8:29:29 AM   
DarkEmpress


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Joined: 6/25/2008
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My desires as a Mistress are simple. Do what I want!, because you want to make me happy,  becuase you know me and trust that I will not betray you or abuse you. Not only doing for me those things you love to do, but doing the things you DON"T  want to do as well. That is the very essence of slavery (vs submission) to me.
Even as a Mistress I have provide my slave with rewards that were difficult for me to give but love and appreciation for his service made it worthwhile. 

(in reply to gentlemanprince)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 8:37:16 AM   
MistressDolly


Posts: 917
Joined: 8/24/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: gentlemanprince

It seems to me that the problem is looking at things in terms of kinks such as play and service rather than as a relationship between two mature people who genuinely like each other as people.  Yes, I would never stay in a relationship in which my needs aren't being met.  I am not driven simply by a need to serve.  By the same token, I am not driven simply by my owm sexual desires.  I happen to love a woman who is extremely assertive and accept her leadership role.  But she loves me, too, and has the need to make me happy, too.

Find out if you really like this woman as a person, not as an idealize Domme.  If you do - and she likes you as a man - then you have plenty of time to add the bdsm elements to the relationship.




I wholeheartedly agree with the above.

If the slave is driven to please, serving his Owner will be the primary force keeping him there. But people are multidimensional and do have other needs, desires, etc. If the Owner cares for her slave and wants her slave to thrive, she would recognize his secondary needs and take them into account.



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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 10:01:16 AM   
CatdeMedici


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uh is it PSYCHE  or PHYSIQUE?

_____________________________

I am the Cat, holder of the whip and chair.

"Let's see-whips, dips, chains, chips, yep sounds like a party to Me!"

(in reply to Hammerlove)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 10:06:53 AM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
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If man is only about his hormones... he lacks the brain power to control them.  Hormones I have and can get anytime I want them... but brain power... that is of some worth and what I look for.  If a man is controlled or motivated by his hormones, he won't be of any worth to me because it isn't me he will see... but a vessle that is a deposit for his hormones. 

A submissive that can only play submissive to get his kink on is of no worth to me beyond what I may give in a moment.  I've had lots of moments... I am in no need for a moment.  I want it all and for that it will take far more than hormones, a male body and playing a game of submission.

I do believe that everyone should be satisfied... but if all it takes is some kink to be satisfied, they don't have the brain power that I need in a submissive man.  Pass... Next!

_____________________________

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(in reply to MistressDolly)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 10:32:58 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gentlemanprince

It seems to me that the problem is looking at things in terms of kinks such as play and service rather than as a relationship between two mature people who genuinely like each other as people.  Yes, I would never stay in a relationship in which my needs aren't being met.  I am not driven simply by a need to serve.  By the same token, I am not driven simply by my owm sexual desires.  I happen to love a woman who is extremely assertive and accept her leadership role.  But she loves me, too, and has the need to make me happy, too.

Hammerlove, I can only suggest that you put thoughts of whether you are a slave on the back burner along with your sexual desires and your service.  Find out if you really like this woman as a person, not as an idealize Domme.  If you do - and she likes you as a man - then you have plenty of time to add the bdsm elements to the relationship.

Good luck.


I think the problem is that not every relationship people are searching here is a "complete" relationship where 2 people want to be together, but often a bit of "tit for tat".

Would I be looking for a life-partner, yes, it would be important to make each other happy in a lot of respects, there would need to be a lot more than "kink compatibility", if it is for a casual play partner, a lot of things are not so important, it can be a trade off...

Having said that, I have to admit I am often surprised at the requests and approaches I get in my mail box, it really seems that a lot of the life-style men (or the ones who label themselves as such) are a lot less courteous and more demanding than clients I had while being a pro-domme, there I could really count the people who got stroppy when I told them that it is not an activity I care for and that it wouldn't be for me, here it seems almost normal that so called submissives get rude and insulting if you turn them down, however politely you do it. I'm frankly puzzled by it, it seems when you charge for something you are given respect, if you don't charge they think they can hit you with demands. Of course not everybody is like this but comparing the percentage of it, there is a massive discrepancy there. I wonder where that comes from?



_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to gentlemanprince)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 10:55:53 AM   
Venatrix


Posts: 2238
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My experience on CM has been exactly the same.  I think the point to emphasise is that the vast majority of men on CM who identify as submissive just aren't, but, rather, are looking for someone to fulfill their kinky fantasies.  If someone can't remain submissive to his mistress because he's had an orgasm, he certainly isn't a sub.  So, to ask about a male slave psyche, never mind a submissive one, when one is so focussed on his dangly bits seems a bit disingenuous, at best.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 11:03:34 AM   
TexasMaam


Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
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When I reward My dog, I pet him and coo at him.  I don't necessarily let him hump my leg until he cums!  Your post made Me laugh. 

ok ok ok ....I understand the gist of your post but really, the humping is the icing on the cake.  It is not the end to the means.

Which is not to say that we don't have our own eye candy, fetishes or sexual gratification, because we certainly do.  Most of us are hard wired to get aroused, psychologically/emotionally/and sexually aroused,  when we are in control, and that arousal can and does, depending on the Domme, express itself sexually when we want it to.

It seems to Me, however, that you're focused on the photos and videos as you jackoff in the shower, more than on the lifestyle itself.

If you're not getting the play time you need, you have to ask your Domme what you can do to generate her interest in a more formal session and let her know you need sexual gratification along with it.

It just ain't all about your hardon.

Best of luck

Texas Maam



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~ My opinions are not necessarily those of the management... ~

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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 11:14:13 AM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

I may be getting rigid in my advanced years.


I wish I was.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 11:30:52 AM   
CatdeMedici


Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

I may be getting rigid in my advanced years.


I wish I was.


*spews Her afternoon tea* Thank you gentlemen for the laugh of the afternoon.

_____________________________

I am the Cat, holder of the whip and chair.

"Let's see-whips, dips, chains, chips, yep sounds like a party to Me!"

(in reply to Politesub53)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 11:40:25 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

My experience on CM has been exactly the same.  I think the point to emphasise is that the vast majority of men on CM who identify as submissive just aren't, but, rather, are looking for someone to fulfill their kinky fantasies.  If someone can't remain submissive to his mistress because he's had an orgasm, he certainly isn't a sub.  So, to ask about a male slave psyche, never mind a submissive one, when one is so focussed on his dangly bits seems a bit disingenuous, at best.


You know, I had a ball with guys who weren't even submissive, they were masochists, open about that but respectful, with fetishists, you name it, but they were all respectful and gents. You would think that requirement is even less stringent than yours and easier to fulfill, so I'm there and offer something people used to pay a lot of money for AND treated me with respect and courtesy, for free, and in exchange I get mostly really nasty attitude, demands, etc. I'm asking myself what on earth is wrong with them? I'm actually wishing that I would have enough time and could plan my professional life at least a month ahead, to say "I will be available on those dates" and take pro sessions again, because it would be more fulfilling, my kinks would be met better, the guys would be nicer, more respectful, better groomed (yes, some people from here come to a meeting after not having been in a shower what smells like weeks) and on top I would get paid to do something I like. Beats me, seems a bit "If you can't give it away for free, sell it"

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 11:40:38 AM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
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In my book if you are motivated to do anything by the anticipation of a reward you are a mercenary, nothing else.

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RE: Male Slave Phsyche - 5/13/2009 11:41:54 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

I may be getting rigid in my advanced years.


I wish I was.


There's always viagra, I can forward you lots of emails where I am offered viagra for cheap rates ;) Would you also be interested in the "bigger boobs" emails or errrr size extensions?

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to Politesub53)
Profile   Post #: 20
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