RE: sexual deprivation

RE: sexual deprivation (Full Version)

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ThatDamnedPanda -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 9:54:55 AM)
So. You're a manipulative, dishonest, and destructive person seeking a relationship that would be based solely on manipulation, dishonesty, and destructive behavior. Your intention is to find someone who is attracted to manipulative, dishonest, and destructive people, and then manipulate this unstable, unhealthy man to the point where he loses control of himself and violently rapes you. And you hope that when this dysfunctional man figures out how badly you've been playing him, he only rapes you, rather than losing control completely and injuring you or killing you. I'd wish you luck, but there's probably no need. After all, what could possibly go wrong? Seriously.... get help. No offense, but if this is the kind of person you really are, you can not possibly - ever - have a relationship that ends in anything but disaster. If utter disaster is the kind of future you want, more power to you. But if you want to have a genuinely fulfilling relationship, a healthy relationship that brings true happiness and real love into your life, the only way you'll ever find that is to get some help dealing with the very serious relationship issues you obviously have. I do wish you luck. I'm sorry that whatever happened to you made you turn out this way. But for god's sake, don't fuck up someone else's emotional health by bringing this kind of poison into their unsuspecting lives. You really - really - need to get some help. Good luck to you, and frankly to whomever is unfortunate enough to get sucked into your orbit while you're still working through this phase.

agirl -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:00:03 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rednicky quote: ORIGINAL: FawneTwo quote: ORIGINAL: rednicky How could you tell the difference between someone who seriously wants to take things slow and someone who is manipulating? That's actually is a really good question. Are you sure you aren't asking how to take things slowly - without manipulation? Well what I want is the end result and I feel manipulation is my only want to get it. I hear so many (true) stories about how a man who has pretty much everything and could get anyone lusts after the girl who is friendly and sweet but not attracted (or at least she lets on so). Or maybe the man lusts after a house maid or a co-worker. A person who is seemingly off limits, though she's kind and likable enough. And his desire for her grows as the days pass. Especially when all of his intentions go unnoticed. Then his passion finally erupts and he does something like steal a kiss when alone. It's Happened to my friends. It happened in high school with others. It's happened to co workers in the past (very romantic story to tell btw). I want it to happen to me. But I don't know how unless I'm already in a relationship where I 'know' his intentions. what I want is suppose to happen by chance like everyone I've known it to happen to. But it's not working out that way. So what's left? manipulation. With me, it's not about taking things slowly. I'm just not interested in sex unless it happens like this. What you want is something that has genuinly happened, by chance, to people you know. The difference is, they didn't arrange it (according to you). It's nothing to do with bdsm or M/s and all to do with playing games, with other people as pawns or bit-players in the film in your head.. It's incredibly immature, rude and silly. I'd be extremely disappointed if even my youngest son of 15yrs thought this kind of thing was viable or remotely acceptable. It reads like the wishful thinking of a 13yr old girl. agirl

OttersSwim -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:08:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rednicky quote: ORIGINAL: FawneTwo quote: ORIGINAL: rednicky How could you tell the difference between someone who seriously wants to take things slow and someone who is manipulating? That's actually is a really good question. Are you sure you aren't asking how to take things slowly - without manipulation? Well what I want is the end result and I feel manipulation is my only want to get it. I hear so many (true) stories about how a man who has pretty much everything and could get anyone lusts after the girl who is friendly and sweet but not attracted (or at least she lets on so). Or maybe the man lusts after a house maid or a co-worker. A person who is seemingly off limits, though she's kind and likable enough. And his desire for her grows as the days pass. Especially when all of his intentions go unnoticed. Then his passion finally erupts and he does something like steal a kiss when alone. It's Happened to my friends. It happened in high school with others. It's happened to co workers in the past (very romantic story to tell btw). I want it to happen to me. But I don't know how unless I'm already in a relationship where I 'know' his intentions. what I want is suppose to happen by chance like everyone I've known it to happen to. But it's not working out that way. So what's left? manipulation. With me, it's not about taking things slowly. I'm just not interested in sex unless it happens like this. How nature says "Do not touch." What is left is mutual interest. Relationships are built, not forced, not manipulated, not contrived. HE wants to go for coffee...YOU think "Yes that would be fun"....or "No I don't want to do that a) yet, b) now, c) ever" You act on that information. HE treats you nice and seems to want to make you happy - YOU do the same if you feel so called. You act on that information. HE comes on to you wanting a Kiss...YOU think "Yes I would like that....or No I don't want to do that a) yet, b) now, c) ever. You act on that information. Here is where it gets tricky. People generally assume innocence and that the people they are interacting with are acting from a point of good will and mutual interest. If in the course of a realtionship it comes to light that one party is acting more from a point of self interest and manipulation to achieve an end...the other party is likely to take exception to that - especially because you are playing with each other's feelings and emotions...and hearts. How nature says "Do not touch." You are 50% of any situation you find yourself in. If you generally act from a point of good will and mutual interest to those you are in relationship with, you have a much better chance at a good outcome than if you act from self interest and manipulation.

barelynangel -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:08:48 AM)
rednicky, there is a concept here you may not have grasped -- perhaps its about the MEN you are choosing if you feel you have to manipulate them instead of simply explaining. The Men you are choosing obviously aren't giving you what you want from them so now you have created a game. Maybe you need to pick a different caliber of Men. When i was mastered by my former Master, i had no clue what slavery was -- the fight i had with him was me trying to control him unintentionally but intentionally because that is HOW I KNEW TO DO IT, he however didn't let me play that game. However, my fight was a fight for control -- i did it with all the Men in my life and when they allowed me the control i despised them for it, but until my former Master took me and claimed me, i knew of know other way of existance. Now -- i can SEE you wanting to fight him for control, i can see you wanting him to prove his mastery over you -- however, being dishonest about it when you know you are deliberately NOT telling him something so you can get your rocks off is a game. You are putting him in a bad and unsecure position in your life because you are withholding informatoin HE NEEDS TO BE AWARE OF. You have acknowledged this isn't about taking it slow -- its about you playing a game to see how far you can push him so you can say to yourself -- i am all that and a box of chips because this man wanted me soo badly he lost his control. I hate to tell you but IF that happens -- its not about YOU -- its about HIM. So you are defeating your self-absorbed concept. You are trying now to explain it or justify it, and you simply do wish to play a game and most likely its a game wherein you have an unwilling person as an opponent. IF a Man determines to master you -- it will be on his terms. If you want a Man to master you -- attempting to manipulate him won't feel like he has proven himself to you -- it will feel as if he failed. And if that is the type of test you are putting him too -- then he needs to know so you are both on the same page. angel

Loki45 -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:14:03 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rednicky Those I consider great to be around yet don't have sex with I call "friends." And I don't mind one bit telling my friends about my sexual escapades with those I consider more than friends. So your power in that respect would be nil. No sex = friends only.

Loki45 -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:17:14 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Whenready Quotes: Guys, I'm actually curious to know what you'd do if you did find someone who was great to be around but, without actually saying so, allowed no intimacy at all. I call them "friends". But that's not the whole picture here, is it? We all know that you upstanding Doms would let the sub go at her own pace once a relationship is established so that she's comfortable and doesn't feel pressured. No, we go at My pace..... I don't have a problem with a sub being comfortable, but...My pace not hers. But what if this period lasted 4 months without even a single hint of desire for sexual activity on her end? What would you do? Better yet, is there a proper term for what I am describing (no, not cock tease)? Are there others out there who do this? Cock tease...manipulative...dishonest....bratty...but not submissive. This would fairly shortly be followed by "Goodbye". (you DID ask...) A forceplay scenario is one thing - but this isn't it. I can see....the Dom holding Himself back until..."OK I have to have her.... " but thats not what you are talking about. I fail to see how you call yourself submissive. Good luck - I ratehr suspect you might need it. We put.

Loki45 -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:18:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: thishereboi If I were the prospective master, I would demote your ass to barn slave and you could keep the chickens company at night while I found a more mature woman to keep me warm at night. [sm=LMAO.gif]

ranja -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:18:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rednicky Well what I want is the end result and I feel manipulation is my only want to get it. I hear so many (true) stories about how a man who has pretty much everything and could get anyone lusts after the girl who is friendly and sweet but not attracted (or at least she lets on so). Or maybe the man lusts after a house maid or a co-worker. A person who is seemingly off limits, though she's kind and likable enough. And his desire for her grows as the days pass. Especially when all of his intentions go unnoticed. Then his passion finally erupts and he does something like steal a kiss when alone. It's Happened to my friends. It happened in high school with others. It's happened to co workers in the past (very romantic story to tell btw). I want it to happen to me. But I don't know how unless I'm already in a relationship where I 'know' his intentions. what I want is suppose to happen by chance like everyone I've known it to happen to. But it's not working out that way. So what's left? manipulation. With me, it's not about taking things slowly. I'm just not interested in sex unless it happens like this. A lot of people desire what they can not have... some people just savour the desire and dream about things... some eventually take and end up in a mess or cause a mess for someone else... yes i have been fancied by guys secretly aswell and eventually they convinced themselves it was ok to squeese my tits or 'steal' a kiss... i nearly puked and they ended up sore in the nuts and i count myself lucky i got away... and that was even without me manipulating any sicko... for the few it works out ok it might be romantic and hot... but nicky you can not force love no matter how badly you want it ... why don't cha just wait until you fall in love and then you will want to have sex with the guy you fancy? And in the meantime just read some more books...

rednicky -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:23:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: barelynangel rednicky, there is a concept here you may not have grasped -- perhaps its about the MEN you are choosing if you feel you have to manipulate them instead of simply explaining. The Men you are choosing obviously aren't giving you what you want from them so now you have created a game. Maybe you need to pick a different caliber of Men. When i was mastered by my former Master, i had no clue what slavery was -- the fight i had with him was me trying to control him unintentionally but intentionally because that is HOW I KNEW TO DO IT, he however didn't let me play that game. However, my fight was a fight for control -- i did it with all the Men in my life and when they allowed me the control i despised them for it, but until my former Master took me and claimed me, i knew of know other way of existance. Now -- i can SEE you wanting to fight him for control, i can see you wanting him to prove his mastery over you -- however, being dishonest about it when you know you are deliberately NOT telling him something so you can get your rocks off is a game. You are putting him in a bad and unsecure position in your life because you are withholding informatoin HE NEEDS TO BE AWARE OF. You have acknowledged this isn't about taking it slow -- its about you playing a game to see how far you can push him so you can say to yourself -- i am all that and a box of chips because this man wanted me soo badly he lost his control. I hate to tell you but IF that happens -- its not about YOU -- its about HIM. So you are defeating your self-absorbed concept. You are trying now to explain it or justify it, and you simply do wish to play a game and most likely its a game wherein you have an unwilling person as an opponent. IF a Man determines to master you -- it will be on his terms. If you want a Man to master you -- attempting to manipulate him won't feel like he has proven himself to you -- it will feel as if he failed. And if that is the type of test you are putting him too -- then he needs to know so you are both on the same page. angel Why would I let him know when the point is to do all o what I said without letting him know it? But I've already decided that I probably won't go the route of manipulation. Now I'm simply trying to find out how I get my sexual gratification from a man, now that manipulation is out of the question. That's what I'm stuck on. I like to play the victim. I'd like to take power 'without' a Dom even realizing. This is what my sexuality thrives on. Letting him know about it sort of defeats the purpose and I'm left sexually unsatisfied. So at this moment in time, I'm trying to figure out how to do what everyone else has seemed to figure out on their own.

tazzygirl -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:24:59 AM)
How about being honest with the fantasy and allowing a man IN on the fantasy... you might actually find a man who enjoys making you hot with a bit of role play

OttersSwim -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:30:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rednicky Why would I let him know when the point is to do all o what I said without letting him know it? But I've already decided that I probably won't go the route of manipulation. Now I'm simply trying to find out how I get my sexual gratification from a man, now that manipulation is out of the question. That's what I'm stuck on. I like to play the victim. I'd like to take power 'without' a Dom even realizing. This is what my sexuality thrives on. Letting him know about it sort of defeats the purpose and I'm left sexually unsatisfied. So at this moment in time, I'm trying to figure out how to do what everyone else has seemed to figure out on their own. I don't know. My opinion is that you are not ready for even a vanilla relationship let alone one with a D/s dynamic. Once you "take power" as you say, what then? What does he become to you? Do you suddenly loose interest and discard him, looking for your next victim? What a trail of broken hearts and promises you will leave...what a dishonorable life. [8\|]

rednicky -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:30:45 AM)
I'm not making excuses but role play isn't genuine to me. I've tried it and I've not liked it. That's why I'm not crazy about actually telling my Dom about my fantasies. I don't want him to simply fill the roles in my mind. I want him to 'be' that role. And I won't be convinced if he's only acting a certain way because asked him to.

tazzygirl -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:38:41 AM)
you are setting up every man you try to have a relationship with for failure.

rednicky -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:42:25 AM)
Well I've admitted that tazz. Which is where the idea of manipulation came in. Since I couldn't expect a man to do all of this on his own, I was going to take it upon myself to make it happen. But now that I've abandoned the idea of manipulation, I'm back to square one.

UncleNasty -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:43:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: agirl It's a screwy and silly way to behave if you are actually looking for a serious MUTUAL relationship. agirl If she is actually looking for a relationship at all it surely isn't a healthy one. More one that involves dysfunctional competitions and "favorite bad feeling" payoffs. Certainly not my cup of tea. Uncle Nasty

CallaFirestormBW -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:44:12 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rednicky I'm not making excuses but role play isn't genuine to me. I've tried it and I've not liked it. That's why I'm not crazy about actually telling my Dom about my fantasies. I don't want him to simply fill the roles in my mind. I want him to 'be' that role. And I won't be convinced if he's only acting a certain way because asked him to. Honeychile... not to be cruel (ok, maybe a little bit), you need to put away the dime-store romances and get out and spend some time with living human beings. Sorry, but what you're trying to do here is cruel, selfish, unethical, dishonorable, and vile... and life isn't a cheap bodice-ripper. If you don't want to have sex, then don't. If you have to have a guy whom you tease and who then rapes you to get interested in sex, then what you -need- is a therapist. Of course, you could substitute a job in a strip bar and an abusive boyfriend, but really, I think that therapy will keep you alive a lot longer... provided that that's on the list of goals. Dame Calla

MasterSlaveLA -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:46:20 AM)
The problem with "games" is the person playing ultimately ALWAYS LOSES... as will you; here's why: This dynamic is about CONSENT... thus, a responsible person on the Toppy side of the slash will not take by force that which the submissive has not CONSENTED to. Therefore: 1. If he loses control and takes what another has not consented to, by all measure, he is not "in control", and you will not respect him. YOU LOSE. 2. If he respects the rules of consent (which means he respects you) and does not take by force that which you have not CONSENTED to, you view him as weak (instead of honorable), and you will not respect him. YOU LOSE. So no matter what, the only REAL loser in all of this is YOU.

daintydimples -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:48:10 AM)
Notice that in all her schemes, it's all about HER, getting HER needs fulfilled. Her partner is a mere means to an end. Sad.

thishereboi -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:49:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici Then I'd say, get dressed sexy, go to a bar, flirt, have some fun, go home alone--same diff--except those guys haven't invested much time or emotion in a gamer-- Good idea and then maybe this part of her fantasy could happen on the way to her car "The very idea of all of this really gets me going and I want to get a Dom so frustrated and annoyed that he sort of 'snaps' forgets about initiation and just takes what he wants (almost like rape). " Well, except it probibly would be rape, but aside from that she would be getting what she asked for.

tazzygirl -> RE: sexual deprivation (7/27/2009 10:50:10 AM)
lol... i have teased men till they wanted to rape me.. and enjoyed the experience with all the anger and dominance he possessed. and afterwards, we both had a huge laugh over it. he saw it coming, enjoyed the feeling of utter domination over me.. and i enjoyed every moment of him tossing me around like a rag doll, pushing and prodding me to give him more. then again, i started out wanting to have sex... maybe i need a therapist, but, i would rather have more of the same!

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