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RE: My mother just doesnt understand... - 12/24/2009 7:38:54 AM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: JJohnsJR24

Just and update for everyone who is actually nice and seemed to care about the situation I am. Its pretty apparant my mom will NEVER even try to understand this. She said she wants me to check into a mental institution or go see a pshciatrist. I guess it makes sense considering my whole family is major conservatives and seemed to be really close minded when it comes to anything that might be considered different.

Hopefully I count under that. Even if you think the advice I gave was shitty, I do actually care your situation and hope for the best. However I do agree that therapy might be a good idea if only because if you find a kink aware theraptist they can help her understand you while you are there. And, as long as the therapist isn't a nutball themselves trying to brainwash you, I don't think a little therapy hurts.

quote:

I think I am getting close to becoming a 24/7 slave for this Domme I have been talking to for quite some time now, which is great. I am hoping that it works out well. Everyone will be happy, I'll be able to live my life how I want to live it and not be judged by close minded people who dont even want to try and understand it, and I will leave the area which my mom seems to want if I dont choose to try and change, which I am not going to do.

Hopefully your relationship with the Domme will work out. It sounds like your mom does love you and acceptance may come in time.

quote:

I have always been a submissive and always will be, and damn proud of it to,I dont care what she thinks. Thank you to everyone who left great and warm responses and advice for me, I appreciate it!

All the best to you.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to JJohnsJR24)

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RE: My mother just doesnt understand... - 12/24/2009 3:26:51 PM

sweetsub1957

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JJohnsJR24

My question is has anyone else ever had this kind of reaction from a family member and how did you handle it. Because I honestly dont know what to do. She is being so ignorant about this, and I dont understand why. I really hope not many else on here had to go through what I just did because it was harsh. Thanks for any input.

Well, (1) my mother had a freak out when she found out I lost my virginity, she totally flipped out and smacked me. I was 19 and she thought I was going to hell. Then years after she died, (2) my family found out a gal I was dating was not "just a friend" and my sister practically shit herself over my bisexuality. Cut me out of her life for months. My only family member that knows 100% about my kink was my sister, and that was because she kept nagging me about where I met my former Sir, so I told her. Then (3) my sister had a total coniption fit about that, and started trying to save me from my "sick sexuality" for about three weeks. Then she came around. I was always wearing Sir's collar whenever the family saw me, but they never said a word. Sometimes I think, until they know for absolutely sure, they live in happy denial, but when they know and have to deal with it.....that's when it gets messy.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

UH DUDE !!!! What in THE hell were you thinking???? Splaing to mom bout yer sex life. You have only yourself to blame. Don't think for one minute that your mom wants to hear where your dick goes!!!! Sheesh

Or are you one of those guys that thinks mom is gonna get the warm fuzzies when you splain that "I really enjoi smacking da bitches around".

yea yea i know its a extreme case of open mouth insert foot

BadOne

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

The fact is had you denied it you wouldn't be in this mess. It's that simple

In the first place, he didn't volunteer the information.....she confronted him first. Secondly, oh yeah, lying is always the best policy.....NOT. And, this is just my opinion, but why be so abrasive and in-your-face about everything? Could You possibly be any more confrontational??

quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

I'm sure the idea of placating someone for the sake of "family" is nice, but having to apologize for being you to a the nonsensical biases of a family member sort of negates their being worthy of being "family".

I agree.

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

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RE: My mother just doesnt understand... - 12/24/2009 5:42:00 PM

JJohnsJR24

Posts: 45
Joined: 5/29/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

It could be your mother is correct also. We don't know you from Adam. How long have you known this Domme in person? Ever met her? Have you ever served 24/7?

I would say speak to a therapist, take your mother with you and see where it goes. It could be a good thing for the both of you.

I have known and been talking to the domme for months and months now. I have no served 24/7 yet,but I have served previously, and I am ready to take it to the next level, as I just want to be able to serve a dominant lady every single day, and do every thing I can every single day to make sure she is always as happy and satisfied as can be. Thats what I feel and what I want to do now. And for some reason my mother thinks that is "psychotic" and "weird" of me. So i dont know what I can do to convince her. She seems like she isnt willing to ever try to understand. And she doesnt want me to see a therapyst for any other reason than to get this bdsm lifestyle "nonsense" as she also puts it out of my head. Thats not happening.

(in reply to littlewonder)

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Post #: 103

RE: My mother just doesnt understand... - 12/24/2009 6:40:37 PM

JJohnsJR24

Posts: 45
Joined: 5/29/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: JJohnsJR24

Just and update for everyone who is actually nice and seemed to care about the situation I am. Its pretty apparant my mom will NEVER even try to understand this. She said she wants me to check into a mental institution or go see a pshciatrist. I guess it makes sense considering my whole family is major conservatives and seemed to be really close minded when it comes to anything that might be considered different.

Hopefully I count under that. Even if you think the advice I gave was shitty, I do actually care your situation and hope for the best. However I do agree that therapy might be a good idea if only because if you find a kink aware theraptist they can help her understand you while you are there. And, as long as the therapist isn't a nutball themselves trying to brainwash you, I don't think a little therapy hurts.

quote:

I think I am getting close to becoming a 24/7 slave for this Domme I have been talking to for quite some time now, which is great. I am hoping that it works out well. Everyone will be happy, I'll be able to live my life how I want to live it and not be judged by close minded people who dont even want to try and understand it, and I will leave the area which my mom seems to want if I dont choose to try and change, which I am not going to do.

Hopefully your relationship with the Domme will work out. It sounds like your mom does love you and acceptance may come in time.

quote:

I have always been a submissive and always will be, and damn proud of it to,I dont care what she thinks. Thank you to everyone who left great and warm responses and advice for me, I appreciate it!

All the best to you.

No ma'am you gave really great advice, I am really thankful and appreciative of it. Id like to use it, but I am so confident that my mom will not be responsive to it at all, because she seems to have her mind 100% made up that this lifestyle is something that I should not be involved with. But I am not going to back off of what I want because she is ill informed about it. She had a bad experience with one of her friends who was involved in it I guess, and that is one of the reasons she thinks its so terrible. I tried telling her those things can happen in regular relationships to. She claims that noone involved in the lifestyle is or will ever be happy and that people will usually die at a young age. Which I guess stems from her one friends experience how many years ago. Maybe I still will look into the book idea, I havnt really talked to her about this in a few days and eventhen she still sounded like she wont budge fom her opinion. Hopefully it will change though. Thank you so much for your advice, it is really great, really the only person who did not give good advice was that boatbum or whatever his SN was.

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Post #: 104