AAkasha
Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: MsMillgrove
Dunno if it wastes space to totter in late to a thread, without much to add, but I want to get my "name" in this one, kind of like signing a petition. I too, find gentlemen appealing---kinky, vanilla, Dom, or sub. The idea of forcing anyone into femininity is unappealing to me. It's pretty clear that no one is really "forced" anywhere. I will aid, occasionally, a male who wishes to explore his feminine side. But it's not a "turn-on", it's akin to the annual post I used to make for a group of college students on "how to cook a turkey" for those doing a first Thanksgiving away from home. Simply compassionate.
I think I befriended Psychonaut when he first arrived here, so now I am considering that as an unwise, embarassing choice, as his veteran comments were ... beyond the pale. One would hope for a genuine apology, but I don't think we'll see it. One of those situations where an apology really would not be "enough", don't know how he'll ever get out of that one, it was Too Much (tm)
Factoid on the alpha male re dogs. As a greyhound adoption activist, would like to point out that in the world of greyhounds, the breed lives in packs. The pack leader or alpha is Always a female.
Thanks to all who contributed to this thread, and to Lady Angelika for starting it--one of the most interesting, enjoyable.. that I've seen for ages. tytytyty~
I can't help but think some of this debate/discussion about how a man CAN be "submissive" and at the same time be "a man" -- or, assertive, aggressive, self confident, ambitious -- isn't also rooted from the problem of the * perception of male submission based on male fantasy and porn*. Specifically, it's the men who idealize/eroticize "submission" as anti-masculine, or glorify the "pathetic worm," or worse, emphasize the ideal that being submissive means freedom from the responsibility of choice, freedom from risk (especially emotional risk), freedom from INITIATIVE.
Meanwhile, when you look at women who have (independent of all influence of male porn) developed a taste for female domination, and our ideals about what a "man" is (a man we desire to dominate, as well as the "man he becomes" when he is under our influence) are very different from the meek, the unassertive, the groveling type who seeks total and complete control from an uber-bitch. I think, while our tastes very, we all pretty much seek the same qualities we do in a vanilla partner, but often with a heightened emphasis on chivalry, self confidence, and self sufficiency.
I've struggled hard to come up with good words to define my ideals. In mean, I seek "capability" as a core component. What I seek to get from him, as a result of my dominance, is "authentic vulnerability" - and this does not mean he's weak, pathetic or useless. Moreso, it's BETTER when achieved from a man who is, at the same time, incredibly strong of character, unwavering, and devoted in that he offers THIS submission to one person : ME.
Akasha
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RE: Forced Masculinity, Take 2 - 
We've done 'can shorties be femdoms?' here a few times: the clear consensus has always been 'Yes, they can.' LadyPact and Lockit are fine examples. 
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RE: Forced Masculinity, Take 2 - 
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