RE: Public or Private Displays.

RE: Public or Private Displays. (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion

Message

leadership527 -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/8/2010 6:30:41 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika Decorum is always in good taste. Kind of. At some point, there is a balance between the society and the individual. Is it "decorum" to have your skin tattoo'd with lizard scales and horn implants in your forehead? I don't know. What I do know is that as much as such a thing is not my sensibilities and so yes, to an extent, shocks me, I very much want to live in a society where he can express himself. Was it "decorum" for me to leash Carol and walk her through a vanilla hotel and take her to a vanilla up-scale restaurant? Again, I don't know. What I know is that while I acknowledge a balance between society and the individual, I am unwilling to put all the weight on the side of the faceless "them".... Not just because in that particular case it would've infringed on me... but because I don't want to live in such a society.

DaddysInkedSlut -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/8/2010 6:34:28 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leadership527 quote: ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika Decorum is always in good taste. Kind of. At some point, there is a balance between the society and the individual. Is it "decorum" to have your skin tattoo'd with lizard scales and horn implants in your forehead? I don't know. What I do know is that as much as such a thing is not my sensibilities and so yes, to an extent, shocks me, I very much want to live in a society where he can express himself. Was it "decorum" for me to leash Carol and walk her through a vanilla hotel and take her to a vanilla up-scale restaurant? Again, I don't know. What I know is that while I acknowledge a balance between society and the individual, I am unwilling to put all the weight on the side of the faceless "them".... Not just because in that particular case it would've infringed on me... but because I don't want to live in such a society. [sm=applause.gif]

CallaFirestormBW -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/8/2010 6:44:55 PM)
quote: I dont see it as a passive act. If I saw a guy kneeling and putting on a ladies shoes for her, and he did not have a name tag on indicating he worked there, I would go ewww. But, like I said, I admit to being a prude about some things. From my perspective, the idea is a bit extreme. Under these terms, every Cinderella story would be a BDSM nightmare for you. Sometimes, it pays to just look the other way and lighten up. Calla

LadyAngelika -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/8/2010 8:03:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leadership527 quote: ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika Decorum is always in good taste. Kind of. At some point, there is a balance between the society and the individual. Is it "decorum" to have your skin tattoo'd with lizard scales and horn implants in your forehead? I don't know. What I do know is that as much as such a thing is not my sensibilities and so yes, to an extent, shocks me, I very much want to live in a society where he can express himself. Was it "decorum" for me to leash Carol and walk her through a vanilla hotel and take her to a vanilla up-scale restaurant? Again, I don't know. What I know is that while I acknowledge a balance between society and the individual, I am unwilling to put all the weight on the side of the faceless "them".... Not just because in that particular case it would've infringed on me... but because I don't want to live in such a society. What is considered acceptable in a society is always in flux. I was shocked the last time I attended the symphony on a Saturday night to find that many were attending in sneakers and jeans. Apparently this is acceptable now. My grandmother is probably rolling around in her grave. I personally will continue to dress up for such events. The bottom line is that we all have our criterias. I've been to the symphony and I've also gone to punk rock clubs and each has its own appeal. But regardless of which one I'm in, I do try to conduct myself in an appropriate fashion and I live by the principle that decorum is about respect through etiquette and manners. Yes, a man with a footlong chartreuse mohawk and body piercings scattered like shrapnel all over his person can still hold the door open for me! And in the end, I cannot impose anything on anyone. I know what's right for me, I know what's right for my eventual partner and I know what kind of people I want in my inner circle. And believe me, I have some very original, outside-the-box type of people in it. - LA

gordianknot -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 5:46:06 AM)
It really should be up top the players, with the caveat that it would be impolite and in bad taste to "play" in a public venue in which unwilling viewers would be offended. (Perhaps they should not be, but why rub it in the faces of those who are?)

DaddysInkedSlut -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 5:56:49 AM)
gordian - So are we supposed to live our lives worried about how MIGHT be offended? Is that how we are to make EVERY decision we make? IMO the only true way not to eventually offend someone is isolate yourself from the world although even then someone MIGHT be offended by your self inflicted isolation.

IronBear -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 6:29:34 AM)
I agree DIS lass. gordian, following your thoughts, then I should never go in public wearing anything which broadcasts I am a Pagan priest nor talk about it in public for fear I'll offend those Christians who abhor all things Pagan. If that were true then the Christians should never talk publicly about their beliefs not wear anything advertising this fact. Do I have it right? Every one has their path through life to follow. They should never allow anyone to divert or try to divert then from their path. They should, try not to divert others on their paths either. Live and let live seem to be reasonable in such cases unless there are breaches of law.

Danishslavegirl -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 6:51:09 AM)
I am ashamed to admit that I enjoy and love both, but I must also admit that being spent in front of public is humiliate and degrading, but certainly fascinating to those who participate or are looking at.

Rochsub2009 -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 7:53:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: IronBear I agree DIS lass. gordian, following your thoughts, then I should never go in public wearing anything which broadcasts I am a Pagan priest nor talk about it in public for fear I'll offend those Christians who abhor all things Pagan. If that were true then the Christians should never talk publicly about their beliefs not wear anything advertising this fact. Do I have it right? Every one has their path through life to follow. They should never allow anyone to divert or try to divert then from their path. They should, try not to divert others on their paths either. Live and let live seem to be reasonable in such cases unless there are breaches of law. I agree IronBear and DIS. The potential to offend is always present. Thus, we cannot allow it to become our master. Are there certain levels of civility and decorum that we should follow? Certainly. Should we allow the potential sensitivities of the nameless, faceless "they" to control our lives and our actions? Definitely not!

Rochsub2009 -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 8:08:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika What is considered acceptable in a society is always in flux. I was shocked the last time I attended the symphony on a Saturday night to find that many were attending in sneakers and jeans. Apparently this is acceptable now. My grandmother is probably rolling around in her grave. I personally will continue to dress up for such events. And that is the crux of the entire matter. Standards change. Decorum changes. And someone has to be on the forefront of leading that change. i guess i view myself as a change agent. Think about all of the things that are standard in YOUR life today that would have been viewed as an atrocity by 1950's standards. Heck, most of primetime TV couldn't have been aired back then. Remember, Dick Van Dyke and Mary Tyler Moore were supposed to be married on the DVD Show, yet they slept in separate beds. Today, you can see unmarried people in the same bed on almost any major drama series. The times have changed. Like you, i believe that a nice night at the theatre or symphony should be accompanied by a certain level of formality in our dress code. However, society no longer seems to see it that way. Even the best restaurants no longer require a shirt and tie. You can go to any Broadway show or any symphony and see people in the audience in jeans. Everything changes. Today's youth embrace tattoos and piercings. i'm sure that many older people are offended by it. But time won't stop for those who are offended. The gay community and the leather community have always drawn stares, and been judged by society at large. But i commend them for not disappearing into the shadows for fear of offending those who can't accept their right to be who they are. But despite my fervor in fighting for peoples' right to self-expression, i still wish that i could go out for a nice night of dinner and theatre and not be the only person still wearing a suit and tie. [;)]

leadership527 -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 8:16:58 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009 But despite my fervor in fighting for peoples' right to self-expression, i still wish that i could go out for a nice night of dinner and theatre and not be the only person still wearing a suit and tie. [;)] I am so with you on this sentiment. It's just like you, the alternative is just too creepy for me to envision. I don't have a whole lot good to say about totally homogeneous societies.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 3:06:22 PM)
My only problem with stuff like that would be leaving bodily fluids others have to non consensually come into contact with. I know with how germy and nasty the world is, we probably do anyway, but I couldn't justifiably knowingly leave behind bodily fluids. quote: ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut . I admit I have been known to give a foot job, hand job, or even blow job while at a restraunt or movie theatre.

LadyAngelika -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 3:19:25 PM)
quote: But despite my fervor in fighting for peoples' right to self-expression, i still wish that i could go out for a nice night of dinner and theatre and not be the only person still wearing a suit and tie. It is common place in downtown Montreal. I guess I live in a different society ;-) - LA

LadyAngelika -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 3:22:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leadership527 quote: ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009 But despite my fervor in fighting for peoples' right to self-expression, i still wish that i could go out for a nice night of dinner and theatre and not be the only person still wearing a suit and tie. [;)] I am so with you on this sentiment. It's just like you, the alternative is just too creepy for me to envision. I don't have a whole lot good to say about totally homogeneous societies. Neither do I. I just think certain things have their place and certain things are sacred. As progressive as I am on some fronts, I'm a traditionalist on others. - LA

AQuietSimpleMan -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 3:40:12 PM)
And I am hearing a lot of "I"s in a thread that is talking about how other people should carry themselves. Who gets to decide what is right for everyone else to do? So here is my point of view.... If you have a problem with things like this because it is pushing your values on others is it then okay to say women who breast feed their children in public are equally as out of line? Like I have said a few times now I will do what I want in Public and could give a fuck what you see or don't or like or not. If you don't like it LOOK SOMEWHERE ELSE. Go somewhere else! Remove yourself and save YOUR values because YOUR Values are not and do not have to me mine. QSM

LadyAngelika -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 4:35:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AQuietSimpleMan And I am hearing a lot of "I"s in a thread that is talking about how other people should carry themselves. Well the OP was asking for opinions, was it not? I don't think anyone here was trying to change any laws or enforce any behaviours one anyone else (maybe some did, I admit not having read the whole thread). quote: Who gets to decide what is right for everyone else to do? Regional laws and those who enforce them, really. quote: So here is my point of view.... If you have a problem with things like this because it is pushing your values on others is it then okay to say women who breast feed their children in public are equally as out of line? Breast feeding a child is not sexual play, D/s or anything of that gamut. I'm not sure why you brought it up in this arena. quote: Like I have said a few times now I will do what I want in Public and could give a fuck what you see or don't or like or not. If you don't like it LOOK SOMEWHERE ELSE. Go somewhere else! Remove yourself and save YOUR values because YOUR Values are not and do not have to me mine. QSM I know people who get off on messing around in public. They are also smart enough to be discreet and out of the way about it. As I stated earlier, the only thing that is going to stop someone from doing something is local law enforcement, or enforcement of the owner of a private property. When I see overt and highly sexual displays, I do look away. I'm not interested in them. I let them be unless they are really out of hand it is obvious that they are being non-consensual by involving someone else in their kink. I've had to do this once, remind a couple that there were kids on the bus when they playing a game of crotch grabbing. That said, when I'm answering a thread asking me my opinion, I voice that I find it to be vulgar and a turn off. I also voice my opinion, I said what I want for me and mine. Simply. - LA

DaddysInkedSlut -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 4:41:46 PM)
quote: Neither do I. I just think certain things have their place and certain things are sacred. As progressive as I am on some fronts, I'm a traditionalist on others. - LA Sacred to who? I can almost garuntee that what you hold sacred is far different than what I hold sacred. Or are you the one who dictates what should be sacred for the world as a whole? DAMN that is whole lot of power!

LadyAngelika -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 4:47:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut quote: Neither do I. I just think certain things have their place and certain things are sacred. As progressive as I am on some fronts, I'm a traditionalist on others. - LA Sacred to who? I can almost garuntee that what you hold sacred is far different than what I hold sacred. Or are you the one who dictates what should be sacred for the world as a whole? DAMN that is whole lot of power! Sacred to me. If you read the post right above this one, you might not get your panties in such a twist sweetie, that is, if you are wearing panties! ;-) - LA

Rochsub2009 -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 5:05:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika quote: So here is my point of view.... If you have a problem with things like this because it is pushing your values on others is it then okay to say women who breast feed their children in public are equally as out of line? Breast feeding a child is not sexual play, D/s or anything of that gamut. I'm not sure why you brought it up in this arena. Actually, it is quite relevant. i almost used the exact same example. Breast feeding is an issue that is getting a lot of coverage in the media these days. Many (most?) in the United States find it to be unacceptable to breast feed in public, even if the mother is careful to cover up and not expose her breasts. The stories that i've seen about it all seem to indicate that most other countries have no such aversion to breast feeding. However, it is "politically incorrect" to do it in public here in the US. i think that is absolutely ridiculous. It is another one of those areas where the sensibilities of others is infringing on the rights of both the mother and the baby. Why should the mother care that they don't want her to breast feed? Similarly, why should i care that someone may be offended that i choose to wear a collar in public? i'm breaking no laws. i'm not hurting them in any way. Therefore, why should i care what they think? My situation is very analogous to that of the breast feeding mother. At what point does the right of the individual outweigh the sensitivities of the public if no laws are being broken, and nobody is being hurt (other than potential "offense")? Moreover, who is the ultimate decision maker on what is "right" and "wrong", when no actual laws are being broken? Is it worse to offend others, or to be personally offended because i am not allowed to be myself due to an attempt to avoid offending others? Is breast feeding in public okay? Is wearing extensive, highly visible tattoos? Is getting multiple piercings all over the face okay? Is calling one's Dom "Master" in public okay? Is dying one's hair purple and green and then wearing it in a mohawk okay? Is wearing a collar in public okay? Is a gay couple walking down the streets holding hand okay? Is wearing hip-hop clothing okay? Is publicly doting over my Domme okay? All of these activities are quite legal, yet all of them have the potential to offend. So why are some viewed differently than others? Should laws be passed to protect the non-consenting public from being exposed to tattoos and piercings? Or do people simply need to learn to be less sensitive and more accepting?

DaddysInkedSlut -> RE: Public or Private Displays. (6/9/2010 5:08:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika quote: ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut quote: Neither do I. I just think certain things have their place and certain things are sacred. As progressive as I am on some fronts, I'm a traditionalist on others. - LA Sacred to who? I can almost garuntee that what you hold sacred is far different than what I hold sacred. Or are you the one who dictates what should be sacred for the world as a whole? DAMN that is whole lot of power! Sacred to me. If you read the post right above this one, you might not get your panties in such a twist sweetie, that is, if you are wearing panties! ;-) - LA I'm not your sweety, no where near actually (thank god). And I did indeed read your posts all of them and in all of them you seem hell bent on pushing your norms and standards on the rest of the population. You seem to thumb your nose to anyone who has a different set of standard than you and think yourself above them At least that is what I got out of every one of your posts in this thread.

Page: << < prev 4 5 [6] 7 8 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.046875