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marie2 -> RE: Punishment, the wrong idea? (7/18/2010 10:53:38 PM)
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GR:
If we changed the word "punishment" to "consequences", I'd say we all (children and adults) learn one way or another what actions are good and positive ones, and which actions turn out to be mistakes (whether in our relationships or in other aspects of our lives). And a punishment certainly could be considered a "consequence" for a mistake.
Having said that, I personally am not big on the whole punishment thing within a relationship. I'm human, I screw up, and I don't experience "guilt" for an honest mistake. I might feel badly that I disappointed him, hell yes, but I don't feel the need to be cleansed for it. A really open conversation about the issue would be the most I'd need.
And having a pretty intense maso streak running through me, there is basically no form of punishment that I can't convert into pleasure anyway, unless it was something like ending the relationship or not talking to me for days. And if that's the result for screwing up, I'd not want to belong to the man anyway. So for me, there just isn't much use for punishment.
Discipline on the other hand, which I consider to be far different than punishment, is something that I do benefit from, and something that I see as a teaching "tool". But that's a whole other can of worms.
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