RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message

EbonyFtshGoddess -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 6:40:29 PM)

temptressofsouls

quote:

in regards to what You said, Ebony....I dont feel that a full rubber outfit is appropriate in public, but I think there's a big difference between full rubber outfits and a collar and leash...depending on the collar and leash, and the way those attached to either end were acting.


i dont wear or allow 'sex rubber' to be seen in public. i have worn rubber catsuits in public.. nearly all the clothes i have in a "vanilla" sense come also in rubber.. i have rubber low rise hip hugger jeanss, rubber tshirts.. rubber whatever.. so my rubber clothng in public (in my experience) doesn't get teh same questions as a slave in a collar has. my rubber clothing doesnt look anything different than tight clothing any other woman wears in LA. and it shows a LOT less skin typically than i see day to day in the hills.

because it looks like clothing  made of traditional fabrics.. ie denim just they're rubber jeans.. the question isn't about my rubber clothing.. i haven't had a problem with that.. well, only once in new jersey on new years after a New Year party when me and my belgian slave got attacked by a mob.

rubber clothing looks like like anything else you wear day to day instead of it's rubber- it's rubber streetwear. some of it is heavy SM fuck rubber. ( i say fuck rubber because it's OBVIOUSLY sexual)

a leash, yeah, that's dragging SM outdoors.. i'm the MOST staunch proponent of SM, i travel the world to give demos and workshops promoting a heavier understanding of rubber.. i do see what you say, but i'm not having my slaves go out in rubber fuck suits.. the most i get day to day is my rubber corset wearing questions.

Vancouver_cinful 
quote:

As one of my gay friends is fond of saying: It offends my delicate sensibility to see a man kiss a woman, but have I ever expected them to keep it behind closed doors?

Maybe all of society should just dress in matching track suits, shave themselves bald, and all learn to talk one language...Then no one's delicate sensibilities will be offended. Heaven forbid we should actually all learn to tolerate each other's differences.

Cin


hehe, that's funny.

i see what you say, it fucks up my delicate sensibilities to see some things, (such as littering).. and if people want to litter then i'm cool like the other side of the pillow- have at it.. does their action make me upset? yes.. do i say anything about it? no.. i just pick up  after they're done.. JUST like i'd have to pick up the pieces after my kid would ask why is someone on a leash in a mall?

i would say the same thing if i saw a couple out in and about doing their D/s  thing. i wouldn't accept it foisted upon my kid what i don't even show him.. and i won't let anyone else do it.

i'm saying.. MOST people would agree BDSM/Fetish is sexual. i dont personally view it as sexual because  for me i dont need sex.. my fetishes satisfy me enough. i'm not sexually driven. YET i DO realize for MOST that sm is an extension of their sexuality.

people argue on other forums nearly constantly that BDSM is sex every day.. how is this different?.

so would we  fuck outdoors in front of someone?

answer is.. MOST of us wouldn't. for me.. fetish is  fucking.. and just like i wouldn't fuck in front of kids, i don't want folks dragging their BDSM play in front of my 4 year old son either- and this is coming from a REALLY kinky bitch in a poly situation.

sometimes it's decent to be respectful of others.. when i say others, i'm ONLY speaking about kids. that's why i take my slaves out in public in areas where i KNOW kids aren't.. or shouldn't be.

yeah i dont care if adults get a jolt. hell i corset train nearly everyday.. try explaining to people why you do that?.. i get lots of comments from women asking did i remove ribs or why do i do it?.. XYZ.

it's not them i'm talking about.

in a mall.. children are present.

i wouldn't let my son see me lead my slave on a leash.. and i don't expect anyone else to.

a little respect goes a LONG way.

like i said.. that is nothing more than a public exhibitionism/humiliation scene being foisted upon unsuspecting and unwitting *victims*.. it's like being flashed by some perv or someoen else busting out with a wax or strapon scene.

when it comes to kids seeing our alternative lifestyle i feel it's not right for parents to have to explain to the kids what we were doing after we've gone home to continue our kinky fun.

once again.. just my take on it.

why drag somethings out and parade them in front of potential minors?

that's my only thing.. if it's not done in an appropriate venue.. or an appropriate time (i.e. when kids should be sleeping)..

then yes i feel its wrong to use people as unwitting participants in our kinky play.

were it not for the public aspect- then they'd parade them around the house leashed.

no- they get off on knowing others see.. those others COULD be impressionable ones.

and this is coming from someone FAR from PC..

right is right..

wrong is wrong.

and we all know it's wrong to foist our fetishes upon minors etc.. some mom that day had to explain that scenario to their kids.

not cool

i'm not saying we have to be all PC.. but we have to be respectful of some people/kids that may not get it. we have to be prepared to get kicked out of places or beat down or maybe even more.

if we wouldn't drag the heavier play out in public.. leashing is no different.. once again i'll go to devil's advocate.. i see both sides.



TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 7:30:11 PM)

IMO..there is a time and place for everything..I have not read all the responses, however...A MALL! come on...we are adults...most of us have had children..I personally would not wish for a child to view many things out there, yes I know you cannot protect them from much or forever, but this was uncalled for..submission should be felt with or without leash and collar ...so what was the purpose? to shock? to humiliate said submissives?..whatever it was,it was unnecessary and could of been done elsewhere and in another manner.I personally found it to be childish behavior...and for some who have stated well "I dont like this or I find that offensive as well"..get over it!.You have the obvious and the inobvious...this was obviously incorrect behavior...though I did not agree with them being rousted..they could of been told to remove said leashes..but whatever..(let the flames begin..be well..Tempting



darq -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 7:38:57 PM)

OK, serious question here ...

Doesn't wearing all rubber clothing make you smell funny?

I mean, dont you get sweaty?

This is why I've never been interested in the rubber scene. I dont like to be sweaty and stinky ... If I can avoid it, I do ... To the best of my knowledge, rubber doesnt breathe ... Like cotton ... It just seems like it'd be awful uncomfortable ...

Anyway ...

As for the actual thread ...

I think it is rude to merely assume that anyone out in the world wants to be part of your scene. If you can't be discreet and keep it between yourself and your partner, then don't do it. Use common sense and remember, courtesy is never out of style.



Vancouver_cinful -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 8:09:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: EbonyFtshGoddess
i see what you say, it fucks up my delicate sensibilities to see some things, (such as littering).. and if people want to litter then i'm cool like the other side of the pillow- have at it.. does their action make me upset? yes.. do i say anything about it? no.. i just pick up  after they're done.. JUST like i'd have to pick up the pieces after my kid would ask why is someone on a leash in a mall?


Littering is against the law and creates environmental damage. I hardly think wearing a collar and a leash in public is quite the same thing.

And how do you explain your rubber clothing to your child? After all, how many times do you see people walking around in rubber? You probably say, you wear it because you like it. Same answer applies.

How do we explain lip piercings, mohawks, tatoos? We explain them as individual preferences in self-expression. We encourage our children to be tolerant of people's differences...be they colour, religious clothing, or unusual make-up.

I still don't see the harm.

Cin



subtlesubie -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 8:26:57 PM)

This is not rocket science - it does not require impassioned debate.  It  is simple propriety.  It is not polite to display your kinks to other who have no interest, so you don't do it.  It is disturbing that adults need to be told this.  



EbonyFtshGoddess -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 8:43:02 PM)

TemptingNviceSub

quote:

.A MALL! come on...we are adults...most of us have had children..I personally would not wish for a child to view many things out there, yes I know you cannot protect them from much or forever, but this was uncalled for..submission should be felt with or without leash and collar ...so what was the purpose? to shock? to humiliate said submissives?..


amen.! [sm=applause.gif]

 why else do it if it weren't for the:

 A. public humiliation

 B. to exhibit your dominance over another?

yeah.. e we ARE allowed to do as we wish, but still i feel a scene like that is using the people viewing you while utterly shocked as an unwtitting victims.

just my take on it.. i got this view AFTER viewing things very differently than when i was 19 and first owning slaves.

with that being said, i have been led in public leashed by my first top and honestly, i didnt find it humiliating- i found it distasteful.. still i did the same damn thing later when i had slaves.. after i overheard that little girl asking  her mom what we were doing or why he was leashed..and i saw the *oh fuck what do i tell her?" look on her moms face.. i was like.. dude this aint right.

like you said.. they can be leashed somewhere else were it NOT for the public exhibitionism aspect.. how is that any different than a flasher? or busting out in a strapon scene. there are MANY tasteful exhibits of submission/dominance. you don't have to drag your leash outside just like i wouldn't drag my gyno chair and urethral sounds out of the dungeon to show others that i control someone and i'm his top.

there are MORE than enough subtle ways to express ownership.

personally i don't think it is any different than those extreme examples i just gave.

now with that being said i will readily admit that at APPROPRIATE places or APPROPRIATE times (ie times when kids most LIKELY will not be around). . then have at it.

a mall?.. there are plenty of things that can be done to show possession in public. he can walk with his hand on the back of his slave's neck or make them walk behind him with their hands crossed behind their back, head down and about 5 steps behind...
hell diaper her ass and give her an enema to make her hold it or release into the diaper.

but a leash in public at a MALL? naaah ah. i don't want to have to explain to massimo while we're at Toys R US why fucktwat over there is on a leash- when i'm kinky as fuck and he doesn't even see that at HOME!

no wonder people think BDSMers are freaks!

a leash says "oh look at me.. i'm kinky.. whether you like it or not!".. ok it doesn't always say that, however that's really not cool to do it where kids are.. and i've been guilty of that twice.. i learned my lesson real fast.

i don't expose the children of others that i woudln't expose my own 4 year old to.

quote:

OK, serious question here ...

Doesn't wearing all rubber clothing make you smell funny?

I mean, dont you get sweaty?

This is why I've never been interested in the rubber scene. I dont like to be sweaty and stinky ... If I can avoid it, I do ... To the best of my knowledge, rubber doesnt breathe ... Like cotton ... It just seems like it'd be awful uncomfortable ...


personally for me, i have underdeveloped sweat glands, so as much as i need to i don't sweat in rubber and i often suffer heatstrokes from it.

some get off on licking the sweat off when their top gets out of rubber. and i love seeing my rubber slaves sweat- i just hate seeing their "snail trail" on my floors. (yes most people in rubber leave "snail trails" behind that.. just don't slip on them. which i have).

rubber is awesome.. and i know many people that get off on the smell someone sweating has when they get out of it.. typically  i don't sweat in rubber.

darq
quote:

I think it is rude to merely assume that anyone out in the world wants to be part of your scene. If you can't be discreet and keep it between yourself and your partner, then don't do it. Use common sense and remember, courtesy is never out of style.


yup yup..

for nearly once we agree.. and i couldn't agree more.. it's not fair to make someone else part of your scene. if you take someone outside.. it's PART of your scene.

and i do public play.. and i do sometimes take rubber slaves out in full rubber with me. for us rubber is just like wearing denim. and i understand that some people may find offense to it. honestly, i've only had my rubber met with hostility once and i've never met with the same reaction from leash or being leashed.

liek you said.. "courtesy is never out of style"

that's just plain courtesy.







temptressofsouls -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 8:44:15 PM)

Okay...In response to Ebony...When You said rubber clothing I immediately thought fetish rubber, possibly because the word "doll" was used. I can see where "regular" leather (is there such a thing) wouldnt be quite as...flashy.

In response to whomever said anything as a collar and leashing being a scene and scenes shouldnt be thrust upon nillas...I agree that one shouldnt thrust scenes upon the nillas...but I hardly call being quietly collared and leashed a scene.



siamsa24 -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 8:44:54 PM)

I know that I'm jumping in late, but I no longer have internet at home so it's getting hard to log on 50 times a day like I'm used to [:)]

Being in retail managment (and in my case that means I am security as well) I have been placed in situations where I was required to ask people to leave because of the number of complaints from my other customers.  For example, I have asked young people (high school and early college age) dressed in gothic clothing to leave the store.  I have gotten angry calls from parents about this, but I feel that making my other customers feel comfortable shopping is more of a priority.  Honestly, I could care less what these young people wear while they are shopping, but I have to consider the other people that want to shop as well.  It would be wonderful if we could always wear what we want, but it's not always practical (I can't wear a skirt and boots to work because I would never be able to walk around all day in boots and it is not considered in good taste to climb ladders while in a skirt).  I know that many people will disagree with me, but that is the way things are.  I work in a very conservative area in a store almost next door to a retirement home. 
It has been said several times, but I will say it again.  There is a time and a place for everything.
I don't wear my plaid skirt with a "daddy's girl" tank top to the library or the grocery, but I will wear it to the bar or the club.  There is a difference.



Vancouver_cinful -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 8:46:54 PM)

I don't agree that they were displaying their kink. They were expressing their relationship the way we all do when we hold hands, or kiss in public.

I'd be unhappy if I saw a couple doing a flogging scene, just as I hate seeing people swallow each other's tongues in public. But I'm hardly concerned over a silly collar and leash. Hell, the goth kids do it all the time. So what?

Cin



temptressofsouls -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 8:49:02 PM)

Exactly, cin...and your signature made me laugh.



Vancouver_cinful -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 8:53:39 PM)

Glad you like it. [:)]

Cin



EbonyFtshGoddess -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 8:55:11 PM)

Vancouver_cinful
quote:

Littering is against the law and creates environmental damage. I hardly think wearing a collar and a leash in public is quite the same thing.


you missed my point love.. i'm not saying it's illegal.. i'm saying it's TACKY.. just like it's TACKY trashy fuckers that litter.. and tacky trashy fuckers drag others on leashes at the mall..

just like i pick up litter.. i would be stuck picking up the litter of having to explain to my child why  what's-her-face is on a leash in a mall.

follow me here.

Vancouver_cinful
quote:

And how do you explain your rubber clothing to your child? After all, how many times do you see people walking around in rubber? You probably say, you wear it because you like it. Same answer applies.


my son has gone with me on location for shoots.. he see's the rubber but not the SM or the beatings or the worship..  but for me rubber is a garment i enjoy wearing. it doesn't get any more stares (believe it or not where i live) than me wearing 8" platforms to the grocery store does. or when i wear leather pants out.

i'm completely covered and it would be NO different than a woman wearing god awful stretch leggings (so '80s and just tack-ay) to the market.. still skin tight.. still covers me.. and STILL tasteful- just a differen't material. what's the difference? skin tight is skin tight.

i don't wear my pussy/tit out catsuit to the market.

but will i bounce to the market wearing my rubber hip huggers and a little tank top?

damn straight!.. and look hot doing it. not looking like i have a few fuckin screws loose.

will i walk down the bloody MALL with my bitches on a LEASH?

hell naaw.

if you do it.. good luck and godspeed mami and trust me, i ain't mad atcha.. but i will say this.. i feel it gives people a bad view of fetish.. like we don't give a fuck about decency.. no WONDER people hear BDSM and equate fetishists and SMers with pedophiles!

if someone sees me strutting down isle #2 in my rubber pants and cotton t-shirt.. i get NOTHING like the response i've gotten from the time i was leashed and have leashed people.

rubber is a fabric like anything else and it's becoming FASTLY popular on the NYC high couture scene as many designers use rubber as an eco friendly, shiny (sometimes kinky) alternative to leather, or this or that.

if someone wears leather pants in public (and also has a private fetsh for leather).. how is that any difference , if it's tasteful leather.. not a leather fuckin gimpsuit.. how is that different than me wearing rubber?

where i live i see people wearing PVC or leather all day.. my rubber is no different.. pair that with my rubber AND a slave.. yeah.. motherfuckers would have a problem and i wouldn't mind it..

like i said.. if i don't drag my st andrews cross out to the mall..

i won't leash a bitch where kids could see.

we'll agree to disagree on this one love.





EbonyFtshGoddess -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 8:56:30 PM)

quote:

Okay...In response to Ebony...When You said rubber clothing I immediately thought fetish rubber, possibly because the word "doll" was used. I can see where "regular" leather (is there such a thing) wouldnt be quite as...flashy.

In response to whomever said anything as a collar and leashing being a scene and scenes shouldnt be thrust upon nillas...I agree that one shouldnt thrust scenes upon the nillas...but I hardly call being quietly collared and leashed a scene.


no worries.. it's cool..





EbonyFtshGoddess -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 9:06:30 PM)

Vancouver_cinful

quote:



I don't agree that they were displaying their kink. They were expressing their relationship the way we all do when we hold hands, or kiss in public.



not being argumentative...just merely expressing another possible view.

what if his "expressing of the relationship" involved her crawling behind him at a mall?

if  i don't have to explain *reverse cowgirl* position to my son because some folks are doin their thang expressing their relationship at the mall... to my son.. why should i have to explain why homegirl is on a leash? yes.. ONE is illegal and sex in public... while the other is sex in public in the bushes.

would that be appropriate?

where do we draw the line?

sorry.. typically animals and owned property goes on leashes.. that sends a VERY clear message to people outside.

that's making people part of their lifestyle and foisting their kinks on others.

'm sure strapping someone onto the railing of the balcony wouldn't be illegal, or to us just be seen as *expressing our relationship* but hell, MOST would agree that's a bit much.. now i with that being said CAN respect the fact that people SHOULD take their slaves out leashed and i do in APPROPRIATE times. a mall.. sorry NOT appropriate.

i wouldn't wear a black dress to a wedding, some don't wear white after labour day (or whatever damn holiday that is).. others don't do this or that.. no one can say what is right or wrong.. some things are just construed as nearly universally tacky.. this would be one of them..

dammit if i don't agree with the person above that said:

quote:

This is not rocket science - it does not require impassioned debate.  It  is simple propriety.  It is not polite to display your kinks to other who have no interest, so you don't do it.  It is disturbing that adults need to be told this.



truesub4u -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 9:21:18 PM)

I gotta say... I agree with both sides of this. Being a mother... i've stated plenty of times.. I refuse to allow my kids to be subject to my life style. And that's in my own home. I refuse to kneel to anyone.. in front of my kids .... won't refer to one as Master... won't allow man handling or ass grabbing.... etc....etc....etc....

Now saying this... to I also know.. that my kids are going to see things on tv... in malls... driving down the street... IN SCHOOL... all over the place.... they're either going to accept this... question this... accept my answer.. or question me more. It's life ... and learning.

To answer some of the other responses.... ... my small rant was simply that they weren't scening... they were eating.. had been siting there for more than 30 mins... in the back seating area.. not in the center spot light... no one was kneeling... sucking face... in fetish clothing (Other than collars and leashes and nothing bulky) My small rant was the way the security guard approached.. and loudly stated.. before words were even spoken.... (I learned this by an observer...who was sitting next table over..  no other words were passed before hand) YOU AND YOUR KIND NEED TO LEAVE... NOW. Now at this time.. I heard this and looked over.. as did everyone else in area... I have to respect the Doms involved... one politely asked why.. not in a harsh voice over the way they were spoke to. The security guard didn't bat an eye... miss a beat.. or lower his voice... WE DON"T WANT YOUR KIND IN HERE... LEAVE NOW BEFORE I CALL THE POLICE..... well the Doms gathered their subs... and left quietly. No other words were spoken in rebuttle..... there was no short skirts.. no leather.. no whips... reg dress all were... just the added collars and 2 on leashes. Now while they were sitting there... the 2 subs weren't on their leashes.... the Doms attatched leashes on way out... that I witnessed myself... and had to smile. But like I stated earlier.. I did see them enter the establishment.. and seen the 2 on leashes.

No.. this whole thing was a catch 22  here... we're damned of we do... damned if we don't. Most don't care.. others say they don't... but they do when it it suits them. I agree there are times and places for scenes... games.... Everyone that has responded... for the most part... are right... each and ever one has been right. To a point in their responses.

Was talking to Owned in IMs while reading this thread (catching up on it that is) And we both agreed to disagree for most part. We understand protecting the innocence of the young ones.... and both understand the there has to be a line drawn... but who states where and when that line is drawn... to what extent. But I told her... I would rather have to explain why someones wearing a collar and leash... than to explain why someones sitting in an alley with a needle in their arm.... why a few boys walks into a school and starts shooting everyone. Though I've had to explain this as well... I make sure my girls are educated on all this... and more... even about sex period... Hell even as adults... we ask questions when we don't understand.... we look to books.. Doms... teachers... mentors... we either learn about it... from it... or we accept it.. or ignore it.



EbonyFtshGoddess -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/2/2006 11:58:03 PM)

quote:

Now saying this... to I also know.. that my kids are going to see things on tv... in malls... driving down the street... IN SCHOOL... all over the place.


seriously.. i curse like a sailor in front of my son.. he knows better than to repeat it.

those folks didnt need to "scene" per se.

a leash in public around some folks (particularly kids).. YES is scening.

no different than me pissing on a slave in public.. yeah.. that's illegal.. BUT.. it's still "expressing our relationship".

some things need to be left in the dungeon/bedroom.. wherever the fuck we all play.

i've said my piece

i see where you're coming from.. and where they were coming from.. but like i said.. just because it's ok to scream FIRE in a crowded theatre. doesnt mean you can leash someone in a public mall.

naah.. thats not cool





ClassAct2006 -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/3/2006 3:31:43 AM)

Lots of interesting issues in this one. Soeone might find the sight of a wedding ring on a woman offensive because it dates from the years when in many senses men owned women. Where I live many women are veiled or where the full burkha which some people mgiht find offensive and others very right. Others might think the skimpy clothes on hot days people sport very much contrary to their religious beliefs. I might hate religion and be offended to see priests or a nun  in robes shopping at the mall or a dirty tramp for that matter. In fact most of the clothes most people wear shopping in the UK anyway in our worst shopping centres are not very easy on the eye..... So what's the difference with this? Presumably sexuality. But it is any different from the Saudi women in my town who are led around with a male escort because they're not allowed out alone and are fully robed? They're showing their religion but I suppose they're hiding their sexuality.

The test in English law is whether there might be breach of the peace caused. So if a woman walks around topless and that would cause offence to others who might then cause a fight then she can be stopped, even if we think female nudity is fine. What matters legally is how others perceive it, I think. If you apply the test to this situation then they were rightfully asked to leave. I think that works fine as a test in practice. Whereas if I was taken shopping with a dominant man, made to wear a tight skirt, hold ups may be just showing in the slit at the side, high heels looking very good but slightly more sexualised perhaps than others and he slaps my bottom once whilst we walk along I am simply lucky that my own sexuality is sufficiently subtle that I can brandish it in public without causing offence.



Chaingang -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/3/2006 4:12:04 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ClassAct2006
The test in English law is whether there might be breach of the peace caused. So if a woman walks around topless and that would cause offence to others who might then cause a fight then she can be stopped, even if we think female nudity is fine. What matters legally is how others perceive it, I think. If you apply the test to this situation then they were rightfully asked to leave. I think that works fine as a test in practice.


No, it doesn't act as a "fine test in practice." It aligns with idiotic ideas like "She was asking for it" as a defense against a rape charge when a woman wears something too revealing. If I by no positive act on my part supposedly "cause" others to behave idiotically - I think they are to blame and not I. It's not rational for someone to argue that I was wearing a piece of jewelry that drove them crazy.

Individual rights are not up for grabs or predicated on public opinion. They are inalienable rights that no one can take from you. That's why you don't see laws against people with green eyes, or Muslim viewpoints, or any other individual characteristic - you have a right to everything about you and everything you think, believe, and utter. You have the right to swing your fist right up to the tip of another's nose.

The OP offered up a scenario that involves nothing more than collars and leashes. There was no excessive show of skin, no overt acts of sexuality, etc. It's important to note that "obscenity" doesn't enter into the equation. One might say these people were dressed as Punks or Goths - that's it, that's the whole scenario right there. Where I live, you can buy dog collars for human use at mall shops called "Hot Topic." Is someone really going to attempt to advance the claim that you can buy dog collars at the mall but not wear them there? It's just jewelry for crying out loud! What if I wanted to try it on in the store? What if I wanted to wear it home as I might a new pair of shoes?

You know what makes this even more interesting to me? The fact that this same behavior could have been displayed non-consensually 150 years ago and no one would have said "boo!" about it.



agirl -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/3/2006 4:38:44 AM)

[

Personally, I applaud the people who are brave enough to make a stance for the rest of us.

I find it so disheartening that those who are willing to stand up and put their necks on the line for the freedoms to do what it is we do, are talking punches from the very "community of lifestylers" they are supporting.



I have this concept in my head of "whether you realize it or not, those people who are wearing their leashes in public are taking the hit so you have the freedom to practice this lifestyle." but I can't seem to get myself articulate enough to express what I'm thinking.

No-one is *taking a hit* or * making a stand* for me...  What others do or do not do is entirely up to them and the consequences are theirs alone. I am an individual and so are they.
As far as I'm concerned, I can live and die by my own sword. If I wore my collar and leash in public and was asked to leave an area, so be it. I certainly wouldn't consider my actions as any kind of stance for *lifestylers* and the people in the OP were more than likely not doing so, either.

I see nothing wrong with wearing a leash and collar in public and actually here in the UK it probably wouldn't cause a stir, unless there was lewd or aggressive behaviour accompanying it... ( which doesn't seem to be the case from the OP)

Sometimes I think we can be far too precious about the *lifestyle* It's just a choice, like many other choices that may or may not be *approved of*.

Personally speaking, I find the diversity of life and people exhilerating.....up to a point. I have *sensibilities too....there are plenty of things that I could happily live without witnessing ...but it doesn't rock my boat that much if I do.

Maybe I'm odd, but my private life is just that...private.

agirl









masterdeltafire -> RE: Discrimination in Public Places.... (5/3/2006 4:45:58 AM)

Without knowing the full situation, and I know I am coming in on this late, I will take a neutral approach on this.

I have no problems with collars being shown in public.  I also have no qualms on a girl wearing one of her outfiits in public as well.

I don't leash my girls in public, nor do things like punishments.  It depends on the situation though. 

It is my dream, one day hopefully in my lifetime, to see the lifestyle accepted publically as a way of life.  But society is not ready for that yet.  If it were a large munch or party,  totally adult setting with no minors, then yes, these things would be appropriate.  But in a pblic place like a mall, no.  It just gives the lifestyle the publicity it does not need. 

I used to use leather collars with my girls.  I did not think much about it until my first fiance, when a kid passing by in store asked "why does she wear a dog collar (it wasn't one, it was just a normal conserveative collar)?" I started thinking.  So I switched to the steel collars from eternitycollars.  They look like necklaces, and pass for them.  Yes they have optional rings.  Would I lead one of my girls in public by the leash with one, no.  In private, and in the munchs when no kids are present, then yes.

One thing that has always irked me in the Lifestyle, and with other aspects of society (politics and religion) is forcing your views on another.  I have no problems sharing thoughts, experience, and giving pointers.  If something is done totally wrong, then yes, I will work with one on teaching it properly, especially if the person has no experience in it and it shows. 

On public, about the only timeI will drag a girl out of somewhere is if she is acting like a two year old.. Beyond that, I usually keep it more discreet. 








Page: <<   < prev  3 4 [5] 6 7   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.046875