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Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 10:16:47 AM   
BenevolentM


Posts: 3394
Joined: 11/15/2006
Status: offline 		What I want out of a relationship is the love and adoration of my lover. I want to have good cause to praise my lover (I'm a straight dominant male by the way). I feel it is the obligation of my lover to strive to give me that cause. I desire excellence. Some feel that love is inconvenient, a contradiction. I regard it as a foregone conclusion that love creates obligations. These obligations limit your freedom. It is true that love can bring a dominant man to his knees, but this is to win her heart. Love is a conqueror. If I have not conquered you today, I shall some day. It is about as dominant a force there is. It it merciless in its endurance and is unrelenting. She is to present herself broken on the anvil of love, today or tomorrow.

All is fair in love and war, even this. Merciless am I for you are unworthy of mercy. You belong at my side under my thumb. Amore, Amore. May you be chained to me for all eternity.
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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 10:20:41 AM   
Chulain


Posts: 283
Joined: 1/27/2011
Status: offline 		No. Next question.

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 10:37:18 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		Is love inconvenient?

For some yes, for some no. It all depends on the people involved.

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 10:39:35 AM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BenevolentM

What I want out of a relationship is the love and adoration of my lover. I want to have good cause to praise my lover (I'm a straight dominant male by the way). I feel it is the obligation of my lover to strive to give me that cause. I desire excellence. Some feel that love is inconvenient, a contradiction. I regard it as a foregone conclusion that love creates obligations. These obligations limit your freedom. It is true that love can bring a dominant man to his knees, but this is to win her heart. Love is a conqueror. If I have not conquered you today, I shall some day. It is about as dominant a force there is. It it merciless in its endurance and is unrelenting. She is to present herself broken on the anvil of love, today or tomorrow.

All is fair in love and war, even this. Merciless am I for you are unworthy of mercy. You belong at my side under my thumb. Amore, Amore. May you be chained to me for all eternity.


Is that the text of the latest absinthe warning poster?

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 10:40:49 AM   
IrishMist


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quote:

Is that the text of the latest absinthe warning poster?

LOL

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 10:41:50 AM   
BenevolentM


Posts: 3394
Joined: 11/15/2006
Status: offline 		I find myself out of place here in the lifestyle given my penchant for the nectar of the gods. Whether it be my desire to climb Mt. Olympus or my adoration of the Goddess in her many forms. Many feel that adoration is a devotion for submissives only, unbecoming a dominant male. A loveless partnership is practical in that if there is no illusion of love, it is easier to get down to business. Toss my salad and we vacation in Greece.

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 10:47:11 AM   
ashjor911


Posts: 7793
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: balcony, having a Smoke
Status: offline 		I from personal point of view do not believe in love any more, I think it’s just a word not more.
It has been dead from the time of Romeo & Juliet.
It`s now nothing more than the love for money or power or maybe both, in a world full of war.
Is love Inconvenient?
Personally I don’t think so

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 10:50:33 AM   
0ldhen


Posts: 2221
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From: Henhouse in Trolltopia, Harleyville USA
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Hmmmm.....ok.

Thou art wordy and poetic, yet methinks I dost graspeth thy point.

For some love is what they seek. For others it is not.

It is not undomly to desire love or to love your subbie. As you read the forums you'll notice that most of the regulars in long time ongoing relationships love their partner/s.

It often enhances the M/s D/s relationship. Loving someone does not have to mean losing your ability to control your subbie.


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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 10:54:00 AM   
lizi


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quote:

ORIGINAL: ashjor911

I from personal point of view do not believe in love any more, I think it’s just a word not more.
It has been dead from the time of Romeo & Juliet.
It`s now nothing more than the love for money or power or maybe both, in a world full of war.
Is love Inconvenient?
Personally I don’t think so



Sorry you feel that way, I do assure you that love is alive and well even though it may not be present in your own life. I don't think it's inconvenient either as per this thread. It might take some extra work but you generally get back what you put into it no matter what kind it is, familial, romantic, etc.

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 10:55:00 AM   
BenevolentM


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Status: offline 		http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Absinthe

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 11:00:44 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I don't consider love an inconvenience.  At the same time, I don't consider it a requirement.  Nor do I consider "love" to be the same for all dynamics.

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 11:01:53 AM   
lizi


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Joined: 2/1/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BenevolentM

Many feel that adoration is a devotion for submissives only, unbecoming a dominant male.



I am loved by my Dom. It never occurred to either of us that he shouldn't feel that way because of his Dominant position in our relationship. It doesn't make him any less of a leader between us. If 'many' feel that it is unbecoming for a Dom to love his sub, then I feel sad for those people to have such inflexible, one-way, ideas. It's like saying cars should not be red, and then you look around and see a lot of red cars out there that seem to function just as a car should.

I wanted to add, LadyPact made a good point. Whatever works for each relationship is what is right for them. No shoe ever fits every foot. Go for whatever you want, if it's love then don't settle for less.

< Message edited by lizi -- 1/29/2011 11:03:31 AM >

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 11:14:53 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
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From: The cold bit of the UK
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BenevolentM

I find myself out of place here in the lifestyle given my penchant for the nectar of the gods. Whether it be my desire to climb Mt. Olympus or my adoration of the Goddess in her many forms. Many feel that adoration is a devotion for submissives only, unbecoming a dominant male.



Maybe in YOUR world. In my world, which is inhabited by many kinky people, love - or the search for it - is the norm (outside of simply play agreements).

However we do tend to be less tolerant of purple prose and hyperbole.

quote:


A loveless partnership is practical in that if there is no illusion of love, it is easier to get down to business.



It depends what that "business" actually is. If your aim in a relationship is to control/be controlled or give and receive pain without any of the side benefits, then love may well get in the way. For purely play I can see love being inconvenient.

But I don't know anyone in my own personal circle of kinky friends who would put "business" above pleasure when it comes to longer-term relationships where a greater degree of emotional involvement would significantly enhance the relationship.

quote:


Toss my salad and we vacation in Greece.


Put *down* the bottle and back slowly away, keeping your hands in sight at all times...


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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 11:17:13 AM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BenevolentM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Absinthe


No I know what it is, but my comment was concerned with how ...

... oh, never mind.

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 11:17:17 AM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BenevolentM

I find myself out of place here in the lifestyle given my penchant for the nectar of the gods. Whether it be my desire to climb Mt. Olympus or my adoration of the Goddess in her many forms. Many feel that adoration is a devotion for submissives only, unbecoming a dominant male. A loveless partnership is practical in that if there is no illusion of love, it is easier to get down to business. Toss my salad and we vacation in Greece.


And many people make extraordinary holiday dinners of just the side dishes and never the main course. By this logic at any rate.

ETA: Oops, that looks gooder.


< Message edited by FukinTroll -- 1/29/2011 11:41:45 AM >

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 11:40:26 AM   
Killerangel


Posts: 1169
Joined: 8/3/2010
Status: offline 		OP, do whatever floats your boat.
Most things in life is generally flexible enough that they can be molded to fit whatever you want. Who cares about how others do things, do whatever it is that is meaningful to you and your partner. More than half the battle is figuring out what you want, you've figured it out - so go forth and love.

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 11:50:06 AM   
BenevolentM


Posts: 3394
Joined: 11/15/2006
Status: offline 		This morning I felt a disturbance in the force -- as if an orgasmatron beam suddenly fell upon a planet, and I heard the voice of a million women crying out in orgasm.

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 12:02:03 PM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BenevolentM

I find myself out of place here in the lifestyle given my penchant for the nectar of the gods. Whether it be my desire to climb Mt. Olympus or my adoration of the Goddess in her many forms. Many feel that adoration is a devotion for submissives only, unbecoming a dominant male. A loveless partnership is practical in that if there is no illusion of love, it is easier to get down to business. Toss my salad and we vacation in Greece.


for some it is the case, but im going to stick my neck out here and say of those Dominants who do not wish to muddy their agenda with love are the ones who cannot assimilate love and dominance as one and the same.  personally i avoid those people and i think a vast majority of subs/slaves do too.

those Dominants who worry that they cannot 'abuse' theyre sub and still love them do not understand the submissive at all.  for a sub, part of her/his expression of giving and submission is to be taken in all ways, physically, emotionally and mentally.  it is more than possible to fall in love with youre submissive and be Dominant over her or him because a sub or slave is simply being what they need to be and they need to be dominated, controlled, beaten, tied up, suspended etcettera....,

its only those new to the game or inept with love or not looking for emotional ties that cling to the notion that to be Dominant is to be austere, distant and cold.

sadly this myth is perpetuated by many subs also new to the game who are driven by fever to be taken wholesale and dont give a fig for love or anything else whilst the fever burns bright.  and we are talking about those looking for LTR i assume, not casual play.

as you get seasoned you realise what a load of tosh that is.

this is a relationship and for a relationship to hold together there has to be some level of need for the other, beyond BDSM, IMO

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So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 12:09:16 PM   
preytolife


Posts: 138
Joined: 11/29/2010
From: LaLa Land
Status: offline 		Yes. It's very inconvenient. And sometimes it sucks hard. Occasionally it plays nice though. However I don't believe it creates obligations or limits freedom. It's just really, really fucking painful at times.

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RE: Is Love Inconvenient? - 1/29/2011 12:11:16 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BenevolentM

I find myself out of place here in the lifestyle given my penchant for the nectar of the gods. Whether it be my desire to climb Mt. Olympus or my adoration of the Goddess in her many forms. Many feel that adoration is a devotion for submissives only, unbecoming a dominant male. A loveless partnership is practical in that if there is no illusion of love, it is easier to get down to business. Toss my salad and we vacation in Greece.

Average age of being able to toss one's own salad?

12 years old .....


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