RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (Full Version)

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rick1283 -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 5:52:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourToDeny


quote:

ORIGINAL: rick1283

Please stop paying attention to me because I am highly reactionary and can't distinguish the difference between 'consensus' and 'correct'.


Okay no problem l'il Einstein. You were only useful as an example that was over your head anyway. And you keep pushing the borders of polite discourse. Ta ta.


And yet you fail to show that in this case, the consensus, whatever it may be, will be deemed correct.

I know when I am making a thoughtful argument and when I am being belligerent. I don't need help from Captain Obvious.
Au revoir mon ami! Votre temps est fini. S'il tu plaît te couvris ta bouche et tu de laisse tout le monde vous t'oublier. Merci.[:D]
(Note: Yes, I know my French is not perfect. If you, for some reason, feel the need to correct me, do it in private.)




YourToDeny -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 5:56:20 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourToDeny
I don't want to post a picture of someone else but it would be nice to post a picture of something other than my face. I have tried just using my eyes and still had the moderator delete it. Now that you know what I mean, yes it is a double standard.

You are in the minority because most of the women in the BDSM community are submissives or switches. Submissive males are outnumbered by those men who fancy themselves as dominant as well. So the traditional fem-sub and male-dom can throw all the stones they want but they don't have to worry about limited options. Dommes and male subs are like Pandas - they go extinct because there are few of them whoever find suitable mates.

A "Dominant Female XY" and "Dominant Female XX" category would be fair because dominant women wouldn't have to be drown out and submissive men could search for who they want to meet.

Dude, that highlighted above is just silly.  I can promise you that Dominant women are not dying out for lack of partners.  Go to your local munch and tell Me that you see more trans Dominants than female Dominants.

I honestly don't look through the profiles of Dominant women.  I don't really know what's out there.  I do have trouble believing that the issue is as bad as you say.  If it is, shut off the computer and get involved in your local BDSM community.



Okay the Dommes obviously don't have to worry about limited options - they're in the greatest minority. Male submissives do. But - my experience in talking to dominant women informs me that as many male subs per Domme as there are, there are not always alot of really good options. Most male subs are not at all suitable for the Domme. There are certainly some good male submissives out there but I would be willing to bet you occasionally experience a sense of dread when you check your inbox and wonder how many pictures of old hoary schlongs you will have to look at, at lest if you were currently looking that is.




ImaginativeWhims -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 6:07:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourToDeny

The Essential Point repeated, condensed:

As far as that goes, what makes you think you get to define femininity more than any of the other people? Don't discount the possibility that your definition is just as oppressive to those of the Double-X persuasion as the macho XY definition has been for centuries. Some highly political Dommes may be glad to put politics first but that doesn't mean they speak for all women.

I am not here to debate your identity but to bring to the attention of the community the surge in misrepresentative - or at the least 'insufficiently specific' - profiles. They are drowning out the minority, that rarest of rarities, the dominant woman with the double-x chromes. In a way it is misogynistic to allow it to continue without in the very least being discouraged.


     I don't mind asking if you have a cock after the third or fourth conversation. In fact I'd be worried about someone if they weren't willing to be sure what they were climbing into. That said, LP, are you gonna lube it up for this guy or are you going in dry?

Kidding aside, I can understand being upset about people misleading you by their details... but quite frankly I get a kick out of all sorts of interactions. If I'd talked to a person for months (e-mail, phone, text, in person) and we finally got ourselves down to fleshy-business, I'm not sure what part would upset me more... that they actually had the cock, or that they lied about having it. Hell, if the personality is right (and mind you I'm Heterosexual) I'm sure we could find something to do that doesn't push my comfort boundaries.




Prinsexx -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 6:15:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourToDeny


Nothing is more insulting than trying to tell someone what they think.

Narcisism can be a very comforting place..But to get to the other side of the reflection aha there's the trick




NihilusZero -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 6:43:48 PM)

TV/CDs should identify as their actual gender.
TGs should identify as such.
There should probably be an intersex designation as well (in an ideal world).

However, the idea that the more logical designations should be adhered to in order to make "searches" and other conveniences easier is silly. The idea that people should be honest in their self-designations, however, does have merit.

(Edit: the 2nd line should actually be "TSs", as transgenderism involves a much wider array of facets)




LadyPact -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:05:33 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ImaginativeWhims
    I don't mind asking if you have a cock after the third or fourth conversation. In fact I'd be worried about someone if they weren't willing to be sure what they were climbing into. That said, LP, are you gonna lube it up for this guy or are you going in dry?

Hey, we already got Theta having to do more work because the age thing got brought up.  Let's not be on the same shaky ground because we bring the strap on thing into it.  [8D]

quote:

Kidding aside, I can understand being upset about people misleading you by their details... but quite frankly I get a kick out of all sorts of interactions. If I'd talked to a person for months (e-mail, phone, text, in person) and we finally got ourselves down to fleshy-business, I'm not sure what part would upset me more... that they actually had the cock, or that they lied about having it. Hell, if the personality is right (and mind you I'm Heterosexual) I'm sure we could find something to do that doesn't push my comfort boundaries.

I agree with almost all of the above.  (The last sentence is the only part that I don't but that's due to My own preferences.)  I'd be pretty pissed off Myself if someone didn't disclose this to Me after interacting with Me for some time.  I've taken some heat on this topic before.  It's hard to know exactly where the line is between someone's right to identify as the gender they feel is right for them and where My right to know begins.  I don't see it in something as disconnected as a profile and what box to check.  Dealing with Me as a person is a whole different ball of wax.




ModTwentyOne -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:11:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourToDeny

I'm forced to go with no picture at all or a very plain depiction of myself that anybody I know could recognize. They won't even let me 'blur' it without eventually having a moderator flag and delete it.



You are incorrect.  Since the profile you are writing under was created on 2/16/11, you are operating under the current photo guidelines, which makes NOTHING of what you said to be the truth.

Perhaps you are speaking of a previous profile from another time, when the picture standards were different.

In any case, if the "plain" depiction of yourself involves a penis as your primary picture, it will not be allowed.

Any other questions of this nature should go to Support.  Suggestions for changes should be sent in using the link that appears on the scroll.

Mod21




Arpig -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:27:26 PM)

~FR~ to the OP...I usually keep this particular response strictly for the P&R forum...but it must be dusted off and used here.... ready for it....???

here it comes.....

Fuck off




YourToDeny -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:33:46 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

~FR~ to the OP...I usually keep this particular response strictly for the P&R forum...but it must be dusted off and used here.... ready for it....???

here it comes.....

Fuck off


Surely the unbiased moderators will delete this personal attack...




rick1283 -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:35:41 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourToDeny


quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

~FR~ to the OP...I usually keep this particular response strictly for the P&R forum...but it must be dusted off and used here.... ready for it....???

here it comes.....

Fuck off


Surely the unbiased moderators will delete this personal attack...



But quotes will keep it alive.




angelikaJ -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:37:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourToDeny


quote:

ORIGINAL: rick1283

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourToDeny
Not at all. I am using your unique status as an example to illustrate another point. Respectfully, just relax and try to see what I am saying.


The only person this whole thing is a problem for, is you. So, learn to deal with it like any normal person deals with problems they have no way of fixing.



Not really. Its easy to throw stones when you're in the majority as a 'dominant' male. Dominant women are a minority - they are greatly outnumbered by submissive men but we are also in the minority.

As a submissive male I can't even get away with posting a photo of anything less than my own personal face without having it removed by administrators for being 'misrepresentative' - why the double standard, Collarme.com?

I'm forced to go with no picture at all or a very plain depiction of myself that anybody I know could recognize. They won't even let me 'blur' it without eventually having a moderator flag and delete it.

But I go searching for Dommes and all forms of misrepresentation are rampant.

To VideoAdminTheta - what are the chances CollarMe will add an XX and XY to the gender options category? If not, why not? It is certainly specific.




I am glad ModTwentyOne finally clarified your mistaken ideas about photo rules.

I had an issue with your OP because you were not at all clear in your terms.
You had used the term TV (transvestite) which is quite different from TG (transgendered) as if they were the same.

I am now feeling offended that in the above bolded sentence that it is clear that you equate transgendered women to be some sort of "misrepresentation".

I challenge you to watch Beautiful Daughters in it's entirety which is available here in the US at least for free viewing: http://www.logotv.com/video/beautiful-daughters/1623325/playlist.jhtml
and see if you really feel the same way afterwards.




YourToDeny -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:46:39 PM)

Maybe some women would be offended by your generalizing as well. It is an affront to what trans individuals endure, and an affront to what double-X women endure, that you would imply that looking for a woman and looking for a transgendered woman are one and the same. Its not like the difference between blondes and brunettes. Women have to spend their childhoods comparing themselves to the models in the magazines, being made to constantly feel insecure about their self image, and growing strong and tough as a result of it. In a way its a misogynistic assault on woman that for the sake of political correctness we are forced to refer to them in such obscure terms as "double-X" women. Its like taking away their whole identity just to share it without distinction.




LadyPact -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:48:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: rick1283
But quotes will keep it alive.


I can promise you that is not true.  A number of My gold bordered notes have been sent because My comment got pulled because I quoted someone's comment that had to be removed.




rick1283 -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:51:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: rick1283
But quotes will keep it alive.


I can promise you that is not true.  A number of My gold bordered notes have been sent because My comment got pulled because I quoted someone's comment that had to be removed.



Perhaps. But the mods don't seem to be too consistent in this thread.




rick1283 -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:55:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourToDeny

Maybe some women would be offended by your generalizing as well. It is an affront to what trans individuals endure, and an affront to what double-X women endure, that you would imply that looking for a woman and looking for a transgendered woman are one and the same. Its not like the difference between blondes and brunettes. Women have to spend their childhoods comparing themselves to the models in the magazines, being made to constantly feel insecure about their self image, and growing strong and tough as a result of it. In a way its a misogynistic assault on woman that for the sake of political correctness we are forced to refer to them in such obscure terms as "double-X" women. Its like taking away their whole identity just to share it without distinction.


And men have too look at commercials too. At overly perfect men (like Old Spice guy) and we even have characters in BOOKS to compete with!

Welcome to the real world. Relax and enjoy as fantasy slowly takes over and kills us all.




angelikaJ -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:57:47 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: YourToDeny

Maybe some women would be offended by your generalizing as well. It is an affront to what trans individuals endure, and an affront to what double-X women endure, that you would imply that looking for a woman and looking for a transgendered woman are one and the same. Its not like the difference between blondes and brunettes. Women have to spend their childhoods comparing themselves to the models in the magazines, being made to constantly feel insecure about their self image, and growing strong and tough as a result of it. In a way its a misogynistic assault on woman that for the sake of political correctness we are forced to refer to them in such obscure terms as "double-X" women. Its like taking away their whole identity just to share it without distinction.


Transgendered women see themselves as women.

And my challenge/suggestion is still that you watch Beautiful Daughters.

I suggest it because it caused the way I see things to shift a bit.




ModTwentyOne -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:58:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: rick1283

Perhaps. But the mods don't seem to be too consistent in this thread.



If quotes "keep something alive", it is only due to the fact that sometimes, because we are human, we miss a quoted post.

If anyone has a problem with the moderation of this site in ANY WAY, they may take it to private mail with VideoAdminAlpha, who is the person in charge.  Now stop going off topic in this discussion, please.

Mod21




Elisabella -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 7:59:27 PM)

-FR-

There's a category for Trans on CM profiles.

I see absolutely no reason why transgendered people should not list themselves as transgendered.




rick1283 -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 8:01:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ModTwentyOne

quote:

ORIGINAL: rick1283

Perhaps. But the mods don't seem to be too consistent in this thread.



If quotes "keep something alive", it is only due to the fact that sometimes, because we are human, we miss a quoted post.

If anyone has a problem with the moderation of this site in ANY WAY, they may take it to private mail with VideoAdminAlpha, who is the person in charge.  Now stop going off topic in this discussion, please.

Mod21



I tried to contact him. Apparently one post was mine and the other didn't have a changed quote from me.
I double checked.[>:]




Elisabella -> RE: TV's - No offense but please stop showing up as Female Dominants (2/26/2011 8:06:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ
Transgendered women see themselves as women.


Transgendered people believe they have the gender of one brain trapped in the body of another.

Furries believe they have the spirit of one animal trapped in the body of another.

Hell I've seen people on the internet who believe they're fairies and elves and shit. But if they got ear surgery and tattooed wings I wouldn't be all "oh ok you're really an elf now cool."

Edited to add - I don't really care how people choose to self-identify, that's their own business, but I think that self identity shouldn't automatically be considered reality.

Like...if you look at an anorexic and she says "oh I am so fat" you don't accept her self-identity as a fat person, you say stfu you're 80 pounds and you're probably going to die.

So if you look at a guy and he says "oh I am a woman" why is that somehow more valid than the person who self-identifies as fat or a fox or whatever else is contradicted by physical reality?




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