sunshinemiss
Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007 Status: offline
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quote:
ChatteParfaitt Oh I think we are having plenty of issues with language in this thread, and not just with UK/US nuances in meaning, but male/female as well. For an example, when I said I was "in the market" I think some males conjure me up there on the auction block, going for the highest financial bid, when what I mean is, if a potential lover caught my attention, I would be open to seeing where things went. I see dating as meaning "I'm willing to go out to dinner with you, and see where things go." For me at least, it doesn't mean you get to follow me home and fuck me silly. For others it very well may. But dating to me means getting to know a person in a romantic way. I would agree with this with one caveat. I don't necessarily mean romance. Sometimes dating for me is geting together with someone I know I don't have a romantic interest in nor does he have an interest in me, but we still enjoy each other's company as a man and a woman. We flirt, we laugh, we waltz, we walk arm in arm. To anyone outside of the two of us, we look romantic, but in fact it is just affection plus a healthy dose of male/female energy. Some of my very best dates were with gay men. quote:
And I am going to take my time with that. Not b/c I am incapable of committing, but b/c when I commit, it means I'm serious, I'm in for the the long haul. I think most everyone has a big grey area for the time between "let's see where this goes" and "we are officially committed as a couple." How long that take surely depends on the people involved, how close they are in terms of getting to spend time together, and how often they get to meet to have that getting to know time. Oh yes. When I get involved, it becomes very clear that this is IT. And oh yes, it takes quite a bit for that to happen. With Mr. The One, I resisted him for months but we still went out to lunch as colleagues and I got to know him. I specifically DID NOT flirt with him and such. If I hadn't been so nervous about falling in love with him (rightly so evidently ) I could have been dating him for quite some time. quote:
I do take issue with the idea that a female should take herself off the market b/c a dom deigns to talk to her. Or that dating a female is "doing her a favor." Perhaps that is others reality, it is surely not mine. Yes, to me that smacks of ugly arrogance. It's also unrealistic. The only way I could possibly see myself not actually dating (if I were in the USA) would be if I were sick or depressed. I've never gone without dates - that is until I got to Asia. That's been a new experience! Dating is to some degree an extension of friendship. To put a rush on that, to become committed before meeting, before the chemistry develops is rather like forcing an issue. For me it has to happen organically or else it is false. Also, it's not just that a man I speak with has chosen me, it's that I must choose him as well. Anyone I've been involved with did just what you say in one of your posts... waited until I figured it out. Then, I was absolutely their fiercest supporter, most loyal friend, and most passionate lover - because I knew in my bones what was and was not. best, sunshine
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Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14
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