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Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 5:41:40 PM   
Iamsemisweet


Posts: 3651
Joined: 4/9/2011
From: The Great Northwest, USA
Status: offline 		I have been on the site, and I have talked to and met, some really great people.  But sometimes, I am just surprised at the way people conduct themselves.  For example, yesterday I had the following exchange, with a complete stranger:

Him:  Do you have a slutty side you try to keep hidden.
Me:  Well Hello to you, too.
Him:  Sorry, didn't mean to offend.  I am just direct.
Me:  Not offended really, but what do you mean by "direct"?
Him:  I speak my mind.  So, do you have a slutty side you try to keep hidden.
Me:  Nope, mostly I just act slutty.  I have a prudey side I try to keep hidden.  LOL

So here is my point.  Why would any sub woman ever respond favorably to such an approach?  Or when someone demands to know their measurements, or demands a picture without even saying hello.  Common courtesy always greases the wheels, as my mother used to say.




_____________________________

Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.
The Cat: Oh, you can't help that. We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
The Cat: You must be. Or you wouldn't have come here.
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RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 5:47:18 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		So some guy was rude.  You wasted time chatting with him, and then wasted more time posting about it.

Save time.  Block, delete.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 5:57:17 PM   
BonesFromAsh


Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet

Him:  Do you have a slutty side you try to keep hidden.



I'm curious, why did you even bother replying to the above message? Was there something about it that appealed to you? Did you think the individual would suddenly become more respectful?

Personally, I've come to love the "mark as spam and delete" button.

(in reply to Iamsemisweet)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 6:00:22 PM   
FelineFae


Posts: 7756
Joined: 1/23/2009
From: i do wander everywhere...
Status: offline 		Ever notice how some people respond in anger when they are destressed ?
The exact emotions they may be feeling could be sadness or confussion, yet the use anger to express themselves.
Why ? In our time, anger is seen as a strength. Sadness or confussion are viewed to be weaknesses.
We are taught to draw attention to our strengths and hide our weaknesses.

Though there are times i am wanting for degree of tact, i feel that honesty is not an excuse to be rude.


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RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 6:04:44 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		A woman told me last week that she went through a period in her life where she would log into chat rooms with the mission to make every hng come. She never got off on this herself, but it was very important to her to satisfy desperate men.

Different strokes. Literally.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

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RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 6:05:39 PM   
smartsub10


Posts: 865
Joined: 4/23/2010
Status: offline
quote:

Personally, I've come to love the "mark as spam and delete" button.


Oh yeah.


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____________________________________________

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RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 6:11:35 PM   
tj444


Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet
So here is my point.  Why would any sub woman ever respond favorably to such an approach? 


maybe she would respond cuz she is bored or to play cat and mouse without any intent to ever meet him, just to see how big a hole he digs for himself.

or maybe she has a website she wants guys to subscribe to or some such scam thing.

I dont usually waste time with most guys, most email without even reading my profile first. I tend to use the block and delete very liberally.

(in reply to Iamsemisweet)
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RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 6:18:00 PM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline
quote:

Why would any sub woman ever respond favorably to such an approach?
Why did you?

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RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 6:18:39 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Was this email or chat? Because if email, why on earth did you bother to respond? And if chat, well that's about par for the course and why so many of us won't do it.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 6:45:10 PM   
Iamsemisweet


Posts: 3651
Joined: 4/9/2011
From: The Great Northwest, USA
Status: offline 		All good points. I think I responded because I thought it was kind of funny. But it did get me thinking about approaches.

_____________________________

Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.
The Cat: Oh, you can't help that. We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
The Cat: You must be. Or you wouldn't have come here.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 7:09:29 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		many people come to websites like this because they equal bdsm websites with sex websites which equal easy fucks/lays....why be polite when they assume everyone is here for the same reason? They would never make polite conversation with the hooker they're hiring on the streetcorner so they see no reason to do that here either.

Never said their way of thinking is correct, only that is what many think and feel who visit this site and others like it.


(in reply to Iamsemisweet)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 7:17:11 PM   
ThundersCry


Posts: 892
Status: offline 		What a goofy question he asked...

Everyone on here is a slut, in one form or another -L-

(in reply to Iamsemisweet)
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RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 7:37:10 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BonesFromAsh
Personally, I've come to love the "mark as spam and delete" button.

Same here, but I still reply first.  I tell people that I'm blocking them and why.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 7:37:49 PM   
BurntKitty


Posts: 3340
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: Here To Eternity.
Status: offline 		<snip>
quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet

Him:  Do you have a slutty side you try to keep hidden.



My answer would have been: Do you have a courteous side you keep hidden?

_____________________________

Cat Quotes

Count Boogie's Foot Fetish Anti Creepy Training video


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Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/2/2011 7:40:41 PM   
Whiplashsmile4


Posts: 2305
Joined: 12/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet
I have been on the site, and I have talked to and met, some really great people.  But sometimes, I am just surprised at the way people conduct themselves.  For example, yesterday I had the following exchange, with a complete stranger:

Him:  Do you have a slutty side you try to keep hidden.
Me:  Well Hello to you, too.
Him:  Sorry, didn't mean to offend.  I am just direct.
Me:  Not offended really, but what do you mean by "direct"?
Him:  I speak my mind.  So, do you have a slutty side you try to keep hidden.
Me:  Nope, mostly I just act slutty.  I have a prudey side I try to keep hidden.  LOL

So here is my point.  Why would any sub woman ever respond favorably to such an approach?  Or when someone demands to know their measurements, or demands a picture without even saying hello.  Common courtesy always greases the wheels, as my mother used to say.


LOL... Dugh what a crazy question. It's a bit like asking if Chilli-Dogs really have Chilli. LOL

_____________________________

Жизнь ума ебет.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUzJI4Palq0

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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/3/2011 2:48:59 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
So here is my point.  Why would any sub woman ever respond favorably to such an approach?

Why did you?


_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

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Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/3/2011 3:26:14 AM   
VaguelyCurious


Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline 		FR

Think about it like this, OP. That's a copy/paste message that would have taken him about 15 seconds to send (I'm picking 15 because it makes the numbers easy, so hush if that sounds a bit fast because I am too lazy to think in inconvenient numbers and the point still stands). If he sends 1000 of them a week (spends four hours and ten minutes over the week - a bit more than half an hour a day) and has an attempt/success rate of 1000:1 then he gets laid once a week. And even if the odds are 4000:1 then he's still getting a new partner once a month. And if they're 12000:1 then he's getting a new partner each quarter. For half an hour a day? Not bad.

What the majority of women will do is irrelevant; he only needs that one.

_____________________________

Sthetic on FetLife.




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RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/3/2011 7:25:17 AM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		I'm surprised that after all these years, people still come in here shocked because everyone on the internet isn't a graduate of the Emily Post School of Etiquette.

Good lord....you don't do anything!!!! You just continue on with your day!!!!

_____________________________

You know it's going to be a GOOD blow job when she puts a Breathe Right strip on first.

Pick-up artists and garbage men should trade names.

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/3/2011 7:48:41 AM   
Iamsemisweet


Posts: 3651
Joined: 4/9/2011
From: The Great Northwest, USA
Status: offline 		Sunshine, I responded to that identical question. A sense of wonder.
I don't necessarily expect that wind. On the other hand, it is a little surprising that someone would use an approach guaranteed to fail when trying to meet a woman. Especially in light of the large number of profiles here that complain others don't respond when they are contacted.

_____________________________

Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.
The Cat: Oh, you can't help that. We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
The Cat: You must be. Or you wouldn't have come here.

(in reply to windchymes)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Good manners when contacting potentials - 6/3/2011 8:09:16 AM   
Killerangel


Posts: 1169
Joined: 8/3/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet

On the other hand, it is a little surprising that someone would use an approach guaranteed to fail when trying to meet a woman. Especially in light of the large number of profiles here that complain others don't respond when they are contacted.


I find that particular point interesting as well, especially when the sender supposedly has all this experience in the BDSM world. You'd think that they'd have learned something by then if they were indeed interacting with live human beings - which is always up for grabs as it is.

I think the clueless approachs happen in part because men are linear thinkers. They're on an adult site, they see nudity in the ads and in profile pictures. They just jump right in, they forget that there is a person at the other end. It makes sense to them - guys are action oriented, they just want to get the job done. If that job is their dick then so be it. They forget that women aren't interested in their dick till they know them.

One other reason is that an online way to interact I think tends to appeal to those with poor social skills. They really don't know how to interact so they also just dive in and get straight to their point. Both categories don't necessarily see what they are doing as bad manners.

(in reply to Iamsemisweet)
Profile   Post #: 20
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