Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? Page: [1] 2 3 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/8/2011 8:12:38 PM   
LoveSparkie


Posts: 56
Joined: 12/17/2010
Status: offline 		I love to serve, it is what makes me happy. Seeing other people smile and say "Good Job" is what makes my little heart flutter.

BUT I hate when people treat me like my mental abilities are limited. I am naturally quiet and I'm not sure if its the fact that I normally don't speak to be why certain people think all I can do is simple tasks that make other's lives easier.

I am a QUICK student. Since I was child, ANYTHING I put my mind too I could learn and do. It may sound far fetched, but it is indeed true. I LOVE to be educated, I LOVE to learn anything I possibly can and I learn fast.

I am submissive and I love serving others, but I HATE when people assume my MENTAL abilities are limited to simply serving others. I serve because I CHOOSE to serve, NOT because that's all I can do.

Does anyone else experience this? Does anyone else feel like people take advantage of the fact that you are there to help?

_____________________________

"You'll never know the good with out the bad.
It's not until you experience pain that you will know pleasure.
It's not until you experience heartbreak that you will know true love.
It's when you face death, that you truly love life."
~Sparkie~
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/8/2011 8:40:12 PM   
coookie


Posts: 541
Joined: 10/25/2010
Status: offline 		I have run into that attitude though mostly in online chat rooms. In real life there was only one person who treated me like that and i laughed because really what he thought didn't really matter. I am not quiet however (nor graceful nor any other lovely names that one thinks of when they think of when they think of submissive characteristics. I laugh too loudly, give my opinions too freely and trip over things too frequently (not to say that any of those qualities go hand in hand for anyone else. Many are forward and graceful .. i am just not one of those). So no they don't think i am deficient.

(in reply to LoveSparkie)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/8/2011 8:51:00 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		Well, just serve only those who respect it, leave the rest alone.

_____________________________

You know it's going to be a GOOD blow job when she puts a Breathe Right strip on first.

Pick-up artists and garbage men should trade names.

(in reply to coookie)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/8/2011 9:16:48 PM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline 		OK, listen up LoveSparkie, you get out of my head and stop stealing my thoughts, feelings, and experiences.

You are describing ME!!!
I love learning things, its my major pass-time. I discovered the most amazing books in one of Hanners' boxes of books the other day: A biographical dictionary and an encyclopedia of world history. I put them on the desk where I do my stuff.

I know that I can find everything in those two books faster and easier online, but there is just something comforting in looking at them and touching them. It tells me "I can know what happened and who did it."

And that makes me feel powerful, I have access to knowledge, not in a mutable electronic form, but in a concrete physical form.

In person I am very quiet and contemplative, I listen far more than I speak. And just as you say, there are people who take this as some sort of  evidence of my being a little slow.

They are very wrong.

(in reply to LoveSparkie)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/8/2011 9:44:49 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		I get this consistently in my everyday life all the time because I'm quiet and contemplative.

I've learned to use it to my advantage of not having to do certain things because they think I'm incapable..fine by me if they want to think that way. Just means I don't have to do the work and they can give it to someone else who will bitch, moan and complain about having to do it lol.



_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to HeatherMcLeather)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/8/2011 9:46:24 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		When I first started exploring my submissiveness I had men treat me this way. I joined a few online groups that were maledom/femsub that were designed around the man being the intellect, and the female serving them. I was like a fly on the wall learning a new strange sort of tribe... the anthropologist in me dug it... but then I went native and became part of that tribe, and that wasn't the way I wanted to be treated.

My intellect should be a resource for my dominant. If he cannot see it as such, he shouldn't be with me. I am not changing who I intrinsically am for anyone.

I think it is being true to yourself first in all things that is important.. how can you be true to anyone else if you aren't?

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to LoveSparkie)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/8/2011 9:48:28 PM   
MstrPBK


Posts: 573
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline 		Based on the OP's question: I would say no. But I would also have to say that I am not your average Master either in that I am seeking slaves for bedroom, residence and workplace.

MstrPBK
St. Paul, MN USA

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/8/2011 9:59:04 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		Nope, never experienced that perception.

If anything, I get complaints that I am too smart.

(in reply to MstrPBK)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 3:59:32 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I've known men who didn't like the fact that I'm this smart, who felt it meant I was in competition with them. This relationship I'm with someone who is proud of how smart I am, who takes it as a compliment that someone with my brains still wants to be with him, still trusts him to be in charge.

But I  would suggest, OP, that you stop serving random people and reserve it for those who earn it. And include in your criteria for those who do deserve it, the fact that they recognize your intelligence. I think what you're coming up against is the lone wolf syndrome, gunfighter rides into town, cleans it up and rides out again and helps no one. Service isn't usually thought of in a positive light. So by serving randomly, you will be disrespected by all those who buy into that stereotype.


_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 4:06:01 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LoveSparkie

I love to serve, it is what makes me happy. Seeing other people smile and say "Good Job" is what makes my little heart flutter.

BUT I hate when people treat me like my mental abilities are limited. I am naturally quiet and I'm not sure if its the fact that I normally don't speak to be why certain people think all I can do is simple tasks that make other's lives easier.

I am a QUICK student. Since I was child, ANYTHING I put my mind too I could learn and do. It may sound far fetched, but it is indeed true. I LOVE to be educated, I LOVE to learn anything I possibly can and I learn fast.

I am submissive and I love serving others, but I HATE when people assume my MENTAL abilities are limited to simply serving others. I serve because I CHOOSE to serve, NOT because that's all I can do.

Does anyone else experience this? Does anyone else feel like people take advantage of the fact that you are there to help?



Start choosing a better sort of person to spend time with. Start choosing better men to serve. Stop allowing others to take advantage of you.

In this.......you are going to 'get' what you 'ask for'. Start a asking for what you want. Take responsibility.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LoveSparkie)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 5:14:12 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		It happens.  People assume a lot of things about people. 

I have found that when I am kind and loving, people think I'm weak.  I'm anything but.  However, if it is what makes their minds comforted, that's none of my concern.  As LaT so correctly pointed out, take responsibility for what you will and will not accept. 

I would remind you of something I learned in Sunday school as a child - don't throw your pearls before swine.  (And there are a lot of swine out there)
best,
sunshine


_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 5:24:03 AM   
Whiplashsmile4


Posts: 2305
Joined: 12/2/2008
Status: offline 		ALL I have to say, is that I enjoy intelligent submissives/slaves. You'll have to excuse me, by the fact I'm a little frustrated over so many thinking that serving is all about BDSM activities and such. Seriously, in my book somebody intelligent that is serving me.. Priceless. I'm also into making the investment in books and even courses and otherwise traditional training/instruction for somebody to learn more. I'm even into artistic Muse types as well. So yeah, this is me and I know not everybody out there wants to have an intelligent wonderful sub/slave. The whole Bimbofication business I find personally as as annoyance for my own tastes. Then again, this is what I'm into and not.



< Message edited by Whiplashsmile4 -- 6/9/2011 5:26:23 AM >

_____________________________

Жизнь ума ебет.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUzJI4Palq0

(in reply to LoveSparkie)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 6:20:45 AM   
ranja


Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline 		i speak English with an accent... some people are a bit shocked at this (they might have lived a very sheltered life?) and start talking back really slow and loud at me... it is a totally weird experience

(in reply to LoveSparkie)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 6:38:28 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

It happens.  People assume a lot of things about people. 

I have found that when I am kind and loving, people think I'm weak.  I'm anything but.  However, if it is what makes their minds comforted, that's none of my concern.  As LaT so correctly pointed out, take responsibility for what you will and will not accept. 

I would remind you of something I learned in Sunday school as a child - don't throw your pearls before swine.  (And there are a lot of swine out there)
best,
sunshine



The part I've bolded, I believe many of us have experienced. If someone wishes to assume I am weak I do not mind at all. It gives me an immediate advantage. It's like a freebie.

And yes, as Sunny said, there are lots of swine. They are their own problem and what they think, does not matter at all.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 7:24:38 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		*snort*  I work in customer service, need I say more?


Seriously, though...

I have met people that think my laughing, giggling self is all there is to me.  I have met folks that see the pretty damned smart part of me.  There are yet others who have seen, and enjoy both sides of me

There are times and places for each of those categories.  Guess which I choose to spend the most time with?

Hold out for what makes you happy.  If, in the meantime, others fill a gap, go for it (but be honest that it IS filling a gap).

YMMV.

*edited for a dropped word:  ok, I'm pretty damned smart, but I cant type worth a damn!!*

< Message edited by GreedyTop -- 6/9/2011 7:26:19 AM >

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 7:32:33 AM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline 		I don't think being quiet and contemplative is the reason - I am generally NOT quiet and I still get it sometimes. I think it's something many domly-types like to think, and the only thing that feeds that position is the matter between their ears.  They want to be stronger, smarter, etc., as part of their authoritarian position.

Some of them understand the fallacy in that thinking.  Those who don't, might treat submissives as "less smart" because it's what they want to believe.


_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to LoveSparkie)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 7:46:23 AM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
Status: offline 		I'm looking for a [male] slave to be my right-hand man.

Think over-seer of the American South plantation.  Lots of them WERE smarter than the Massa' what went to parties and long visits leaving the homestead in the hands of the over-seer because they knew they could.  In my instance I WANT a smart one.  Some of my boys - I'm moving toward slaves - have been smarter than myself.  I've always said "I need a smart one."

Since a slave is my property, I want him trained so that when he "does" something, it is as if I had done it myself.  Short version: I want him to act in my name.  What he produces is also mine...... I'm thinking specifically of writing.  Maybe some speaking to audiences - as in BDSM lectures.

Thus, since I am smart and he is to produce "in my name," he must be samrt. [Oh, yeah. and know how to type and spell.]

_____________________________

"Train 'em the right way - my way." Lance Hughes
"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't." Erica Jong

10 fluffy points
50 nz points

Member: VAA's posse

(in reply to NuevaVida)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 7:55:01 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		*giggles*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LanceHughes)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 7:56:52 AM   
strangedesire


Posts: 360
Joined: 12/23/2008
Status: offline 		The girlfriend gets this often, because she's young and pretty and female. It makes me want to stab people.

_____________________________

On that other site as Exegesis.

(in reply to LoveSparkie)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? - 6/9/2011 8:24:33 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		Grins
It's far, far better to walk through life underestimated by those about you than the other way around.


_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to strangedesire)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Slave/Submissive: - Your MENTAL abilities are limited? Page: [1] 2 3 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.172