quote:

used an example that can only be applied to my situation and dynamic about my work. Then Hannah told me repeatedly i was incompetent because at times i need to call my boss multiple times to get things done.

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather

quote:

If the D says she has to ask, then yes, he should have to answer.

Wouldn't no answer be an answer?

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi

quote:

If the s-type asks permission for something, is the d-type expected/required to answer? What if he doesn't answer or is too busy?

If the D says she has to ask, then yes, he should have to answer. Or he should make plans on what the sub should do if she can't contact him.

I do not think so, but hey, if my orgasm can't wait for an hour until he gets a moment to answer me, I suppose perhaps I picked the wrong relationship style to engage myself in..

that is just my opinion

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

it's the wants that seem to cause the most debate.

Even when you don't have a dom... I just debate it with myself these days

quote:

It would be highly unrealistic for Alandra and I to expect him to be available all the time.

I think most of us can consider that there will be times when a dominant cannot answer their phone... I would not expect any human being to be at my constant beck and call, personally. If that expectation works for others, then that it works for them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

a touch of defensiveness here, but a personal attack if it had come from Icarys.
just sayin'.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

The question pretty much seems answered now, but just a few words on this subject.

I'm actually kind of shocked that five pages went on about how *wants* should be dealt with.  If clip called Me up at 3:00 AM because he felt like having a candy bar (not talking about a diabetic situation, which pretty much changes the subject to a need, for health reasons at times) I'd probably blow a gasket.  If we're talking about some little whim and I can't be reached, consider that I've said no.

There's an old saying that goes, "piss poor planning on your part doesn't constitute an emergency on My part".  Most of the small wants that those who aren't being micro-managed, but have to ask for permission to have, aren't going to kill anybody if they don't get them. 

Any people doing this thing should know enough about the lives of the other to understand how this works out.  Sometimes, you're going to deal with waiting for wants, and sometimes, you're not going to get what you want.  Half of the time, there was something about the *wants* that made asking permission necessary in the first place.

quote:

If a Dom is at your beck and call.... not you, julia, but a submissives... who is really in control?

quote:

"if I don't answer, consider the answer as no"

quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

fuck off julia, you're always so god damned sensible and reasonable it makes me want to rip your clothes off, throw you down  and just fucking ravish you. then talk for a day or three about fucking anthropology and sociology and similar stuff you and heather would understand while i just ogled you both admiring your great fucking huge sexy fucking minds (with occasional further ravishings to keep things spicy).

yeah, yeah, i know you're fucking straight, but a girl can fantasize can't she? anyway this is my fucking weird way of saying thanks for being a voice of calm and reason, i need reminding of those virtues on the rare occasion. especially when i'm told i "have" to do something.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SpiritedRadiance

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

Because I did something most people do, I used my dynamic as my example for my opinion.

Here is something that a lot of people do not understand when talking to others about relationships... saying "for me it wouldn't work" is a lot different statement than "it is wrong to do it the way you do"
As you can see, you didn't like people voicing their opinions about your dynamic, so perhaps in the future you might keep that in mind when discussing what other people do.

I suggest you go back and re-read in more then one post i state things like in my case, its not compatible with me, or other such things to express that what im stating is in my opinion and my interpretation. as well as every post in my sigline says what i say is my opinion.

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

lol I think you misunderstood the question. By beck and call, I meant if he is required to respond to every call or text message.