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RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 6:54:58 PM

CERCKL

Posts: 1039
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline

quote:

Some people like to share, and can make up justifications for sharing. Some people don't like to share and make up their own justifications.

No justifications, no rationalizations...I'm just a selfish, possessive asshole; what is mine is mine.

C

_____________________________

AND I AM TOO AN ASSHOLE, I HAVE REFERENCES!!!

"Please, please, please believe me, I really am an asshole. All that Enlightenment and Higher Learning shit was all a ruse."

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

Post #: 21

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 6:56:30 PM

LovingSadist

Posts: 28
Joined: 4/26/2006
From: Denmark
Status: offline

The sheer thought of sharing her with other makes me cringe.
But then again I’ll not rule out the possibility some time in the future that it can become necessary to loan her to another sadistic dom to satisfy his sexual needs in order to further develop her submission and obedience. That’s how much I love her.

Loving Sadist

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

Post #: 22

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 7:04:56 PM

DesertRat

Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
Status: offline

While I fully understand and accept the concept of sharing, I wouldn't even consider having my slave serve another. I guess I am not wired that way...or rather, we aren't.

Bob

_____________________________

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro--Hunter S. Thompson
It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide!--Chief Dead St. Knockout, 1933, Liverpool
Damn the crops. I'll only find peace at the end of a rope.--Winston Van Loo, 1911

(in reply to LovingSadist)

Post #: 23

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 7:06:49 PM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CERCKL
what is mine is mine.

People who like to share use those exact words, adding, you can't share what isn't yours.

Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to CERCKL)

Post #: 24

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 7:10:36 PM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: perverseangelic

My Owner shares me with people we like. He shares fully, both sexually and in an s&m sense. I'm lucky in that I'm (often) able to have some input on who we play with, because we prefer forming relationships with them, and it's easier if we both like 'em and not just tolerate them.

I understand what people are saying about not sharing what is the Owners, but his perspective is this--I -am- his. Nothing is going to change that, and no one is going to come close to abbridging that. If anything, sending me out to someone else reinforces how his I am, because even when playing with someone else, it's his rules before all else. That and he thinks it's hot to see me with other men/women. ~shrug~ t'weach their own.

I feel very much the same way.

I figure in social situations to deny Fox his desire to be of service and helpful to others would be cruel of me. Plus it shows him off and gets me compliments which are nice ego boosts.

If someone I don't know comes to me to ask if Fox can help them with a task or to play with, I will say "Let me think about it" and part of my thinking is letting Fox know and seeing what his reaction is. Again, he may have met them at a workshop or in the bathroom and find them annoying -- what does it benefit me to send him off with someone he doesn't think much of? Most strangers don't do this though.

With people we know, I already know how he feels about them but I still check in. What if someone at the bookstore has told him that they need boxes moved in a few mintues or what if he's starting to get a migraine? My responsiblity is to know about all this and manage it afterall but I can only do that if I ask about things.

I don't consider this me loaning Fox to others or as Fox serving or submitting to others. I just see it as further service to me, making me look better in the eyes of my peers by letting enjoy Fox's good work.

I am, whether I like it or not, viewed partly by how my submissives and my slaves behave in public.

< Message edited by thetammyjo -- 5/17/2006 7:14:23 PM >

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to perverseangelic)

Post #: 25

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 7:15:01 PM

CERCKL

Posts: 1039
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline

quote:

People who like to share use those exact words, adding, you can't share what isn't yours.

Granted, and understood...but you left out the important point of my statement, the qualification of "selfish, possessive asshole" <g>

C

_____________________________

AND I AM TOO AN ASSHOLE, I HAVE REFERENCES!!!

"Please, please, please believe me, I really am an asshole. All that Enlightenment and Higher Learning shit was all a ruse."

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

Post #: 26

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 7:17:09 PM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CERCKL
"selfish, possessive asshole" <g>

To thine own self be true...

Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to CERCKL)

Post #: 27

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 7:20:11 PM

CERCKL

Posts: 1039
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline

quote:

To thine own self be true...

Always <evil grin>

C

_____________________________

AND I AM TOO AN ASSHOLE, I HAVE REFERENCES!!!

"Please, please, please believe me, I really am an asshole. All that Enlightenment and Higher Learning shit was all a ruse."

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

Post #: 28

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 7:23:54 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear WhiteRadiance, Ladies and Gentlemen;

Sharing is a broad term. I am in agreement that any slave of mine will not be shared sexually however, if there is a need for demonstrations for CBT or nipple torture (NT) I will loan them but, I will be there.

Being witness to a training academy, the loaning of slaves by Masters is so necessary and very kind of both Masters/Mistresses and slaves. Without staff slaves the academy couldn't function. They work their hind parts off and do so much for everybody. Frankly, there is no time for sex and most times little chance for a meal. From 5AM until midnight staff slaves are busy, leaving Masters like myself free to carry on instructions.

If I had a slave or more, I certainly would be glad to see them assist in a fine endevour to educate on the M/s dynamic more than the BDSM aspects, which the regional area BDSM support and education groups do so well.

The only other academy like it, is Master Steve Sampson's academy in Phoenix, Arizona.

I would also allow my slave to assist any Master/Mistress that needed it. Just as Masters have assigned their slaves to me as to assist me. It is also to be said, it is more than just service--it is a practive of good manners and civility that has been lost as society runs forward at a fast pace.

Respectfully submitted,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to WhiteRadiance)

Post #: 29

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 7:26:55 PM

apb

Posts: 103
Joined: 9/21/2005
Status: offline

my MissTress is happy to share me ... i have played with others in her presence, she has others share in a scene (both Dom/me and sub) and she likes me to take care of any subs that play with U/us. i have to say i enjoy looking after other subs that play (subbie love). she has also loaned me out to perform massages ...

i see it as sharing the lifestyle and further serving Her by serving Others.

_____________________________

~ apb

"This is who I am - you can like it or not. You can love me or leave me 'cos I'm never gonna' stop."
~ Madonna

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 30

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 9:16:44 PM

LadyJezOfTheLake

Posts: 108
Joined: 5/10/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiteRadiance

Here is a question for both Dominants and submissives. Dom/mes, do you share your subs? Subs, do you serve your Master or Mistresses friends, and if so, in what capacity?

I do not know about anyone else here, but I quite often get mail from "subs" who want do anything for me (and my girlfriends) pleasure. lol Some submissives (term used loosly here) seem to want to "serve" anyone who is present. Is this commonly done? Who does it, and why?

I will allow my sub to serve my friends in a non-sexual capacity. Am I a minority? How do others feel about this issue?

We are a closed poly triad, this means no sex outside of U/us 3.

Lady Jezabel Of The Lake

_____________________________

Lady Jezabel Of The Lake
Free Companion To Master Ken
Warrior, Wordsmith & Scribe

(in reply to WhiteRadiance)

Post #: 31

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 9:48:09 PM

Sinergy

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline

Hello,

I have never met anybody I trusted enough to allow them access to my toy.

While I try to avoid to speak in infinitives, I imagine the answer to the question asked is "no"

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

Post #: 32

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 9:52:44 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty

I love to share...and have often been the recipient of a Top that is willing to share.

I think it has much more to do with your personality than with any aspect of BDSM. Some people like to share, and can make up justifications for sharing. Some people don't like to share and make up their own justifications.

Taggard

I do not think that it is necessarily that simple...lol. This is something negotiated in terms of limits for a D/s relationship. If the sub has a hard limit then I am guessing the dom either respects it or releases her or never collars her in the first place. So no, it is not all about whether a dom will share or not. Some doms will share some of their subs/slaves, but not other sub/slaves also. So they may have a sharing spirit in one dynamic but not the other.

I was with a dom that would have expected me to serve in this capacity eventually, and as that time drew nearer and nearer I became less and less comfortable with the idea of being "shared". I am glad it never happened to be totally honest, as the fantasy turned me on, but I was in no way prepared for the reality.

Now I am seeing someone that does not share his toys, and I am becoming his toy over time...smiles.... It will not be a part of our dynamic as it moves forward. I am not to take even nonsexual serving orders from others, only from him if we work out this way. I am glad he thinks as some others on this board think... whats His is His... and if I become His I will appreciate it. But that is how I feel about it, and others have different needs and wants and kinks.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

Post #: 33

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 10:15:17 PM

MochaMistress

Posts: 275
Joined: 1/8/2006
Status: offline

I was sick the day they taught sharing in pre-school.
So I dont share. Whats mine is mine.

(in reply to WhiteRadiance)

Post #: 34

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/17/2006 10:26:08 PM

yourMissTress

Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MouseTrapp

my MissTress is happy to share me ... i have played with others in her presence, she has others share in a scene (both Dom/me and sub) and she likes me to take care of any subs that play with U/us. i have to say i enjoy looking after other subs that play (subbie love). she has also loaned me out to perform massages ...

i see it as sharing the lifestyle and further serving Her by serving Others.

I do love to share My dear girl. As we share in enjoying a little exhibitionism (not too much), we also share in the joys of her service. She enjoys serving and I enjoy watching her serve. I love to see her assisting, teaching, guiding other subs, she is such a natural submissive and good teacher as well. I also love to have her do aftercare cuddling for a very special male sub.

I have made a banana split out of her and sat back and watched while 12-15 people licked ice cream and all sorts of other goodies off of her. I've had her give a foot, back and neck massages to friends in the lifestyle. I've also used her to sexually torment male subs. And I've invited other Dom/me's to join Me in beating or whipping her. All under My watchful, gleeful eye.

She's Mine to do with as I please, and while I share her, gladly, I also take extremely good care of her.

_____________________________

Tress

"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother

(in reply to apb)

Post #: 35

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/18/2006 12:33:47 AM

Vendaval

Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiteRadiance

Here is a question for both Dominants and submissives. Dom/mes, do you share your subs?

I rank really low on the jealousy or possessive scale. I am however;
very protective. So having a sub/slave do a Scene with another
Dom/Domme for the experience is fine by Me. The Scene has
to be discussed first of course, and I will most likely grant permission.
I am most concerned with maintaining their ability to serve and please Me in the future. So the other Top/Dom/Domme better not screw up!

And some of My favorite experiences come from doubling up
with another Dom/Domme on the poor little sub/slaves. Much
to their everlasting and eternal torment....muhahahaha

I do not know about anyone else here, but I quite often get mail from "subs" who want do anything for me (and my girlfriends) pleasure. lol Some submissives (term used loosly here) seem to want to "serve" anyone who is present. Is this commonly done? Who does it, and why?

Can you say, "Jerk off material"!? In a word, Not!
It is a very common fantasy for wanna-be male submissives. lol

I will allow my sub to serve my friends in a non-sexual capacity. Am I a minority? How do others feel about this issue?

In a non-sexual or play capacity, sure. Some of the local kinksters who
host play parties will ask for assistance with set-up and tear down.
Since the boy is a manly-man-body-builder, he gets sent to do the
grunt work. And he likes it too. My former girl was incredible, both
in and out of the bedroom. She was a server at a high protocol
dinner and everyone praised her beauty and grace. I do like
to take them out and show them off, it makes Me look good.

Regards,

Vendaval

< Message edited by Vendaval -- 5/18/2006 12:36:35 AM >

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE

http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to WhiteRadiance)

Post #: 36

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/18/2006 1:03:47 AM

CanadianGuy

Posts: 219
Status: offline

What a good question, and one that interests me to think about, and to hear others' replies.

My girl and I have been together almost 4 years, but only in person for 3 nights out of that. Next month we'll add 4 more nights... and someday soon I hope to add thousands more. So the possibility of sharing her with anyone else hasn't come up.

I'm really, really possessive. In fact, to the point of jealousy sometimes. (I often tell her that jealousy is possessiveness without control... in other words, not a good thing.) It's something I'm working on. She has had some cyber-slip-ups in the past so it's a bit of a touchy subject.

I don't think I would ever let another guy have intercourse with her. We've roleplayed such scenarios and sometimes we want that, and sometimes we don't. In reality, I doubt it would happen. I can see myself giving her to a trusted dominant friend for oral sex, where I was present, in the right situation. I definitely could see almost anything happening between her and another girl, although I'd likely have to be present, and it wouldn't involve her being hurt or subjected to extreme control. I'm possessive even over control.. in fact in a large way. I want to be the only one in control of her. Sometimes we talk about perhaps loaning her to a rich business type man, perhaps a partner of mine or something, to further my relationship with him and his company, etc. You know, use her as a sexy pawn type thing. I don't know how far that'd go in real life, though. I love her so much, and I'm the only one who has ever been inside her. Perhaps down the road there will be some play in this regard.

I definitely would love to be friends with another dominant guy who wanted me to help train his girl, or perhaps humiliate her by sharing her with me, or even drop her off for the weekend while he's out of town and say "do what you want with her as long as she comes back healthy and safe". That would be hot. :p And yeah, my girl would definitely be up for that, as long as she's the "most submissive". She wants her position to be the "lowest", as it were. I think she feels that her place is underneath everyone, even another submissive should I choose to take one. She would still be mine, my most precious one, my little girl. Nothing can change that.

Again, good question.

(in reply to Vendaval)

Post #: 37

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/18/2006 1:18:55 AM

LOTUS3

Posts: 14
Joined: 4/22/2006
Status: offline

ok so here goes with my answer on this then i am off to dreamtime ....
I am Cerckls (or C) ,( Prefere to call him Papa ), Lotus ...
I am not "into" the whole sharing thing either and it's not because it hasn't been done ,BUT , I get way too emotionally unavailable to anyone else and honestly , I Hate being odd sub out... also selfish...
I do however love , scening with him so others can watch...
I am glad Papa is possesive of me , I know I am safe when I am with him , no matter how hardcore it could get.

Namaste' Lotus

_____________________________

And she shuddered as she lay across Papas lap, and the sting of his hand left another print on her already reddened ass... tears welled up in her eyes and she cried... Papa held her , with more love than she'd ever had .
LOTUS

(in reply to CanadianGuy)

Post #: 38

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/18/2006 1:29:39 AM

Sab

Posts: 325
Joined: 5/2/2006
From: Canada
Status: offline

I should elaborate on my NO! - No, I will not share, what is Mine is Mine. :)

_____________________________

God blessed it and it brought me to her.

(in reply to LOTUS3)

Post #: 39

RE: How many Dominants share their subs - 5/18/2006 5:19:28 AM

angelface183

Posts: 688
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline

My Dom has not yet shared me as I am still in the early stages of my training with Him. It is something that we have discussed with great fervor. I definitely see it being part of our future together. For me, I think MisTress said it best:

quote:

She's Mine to do with as I please, and while I share her, gladly, I also take extremely good care of her.

I know this is how SacredDom feels and I trust him implicitly.

angelface

(in reply to WhiteRadiance)

Post #: 40

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