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Child support - 5/20/2006 4:35:45 PM   
Termyn8or


Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline 		Talk about off topic, but we seem to be discussing such a wide range of topics, I guess it fits. I have given some financial advice in the forum, some might not be the best, but I callem as I see em. My financial situation is different than most, and what I need to know to survive in this jungle is tailored to that. I sincerely hope if anyone actually takes my advice they do well with it and has success. Otherwise I would not give it.

This problem is a little bit out of my normal perview, and seeing many intelligent responses on a variety of financial topics, I thought I would throw this out there.

A friend of mine was ruined by a divorce. Homeless all that. Pulling himself up from that has not been easy. He is willing to work and does, and recently got his driver's license back. Between us, even though my insurance didn't cover him I let him use my car to take the test. He has come a long way.

He works full time, and after all the deductions and his bills he gets, sometimes only $11 a week to live on. Food all that. Overtime is grand for him, he can triple his disposable income (+food) in hours. It is not the highest paying job in the world, and with the ninety something dollars a week they take for child support he is left with very little.

He is fine with this. Another friend of mine is renting to him cheap, and realistically I would probably loan him money for insurance if he got himself a car. I asked why doesn't he just work under the table, he says "Those are my kids, and I want to see them". He has no qualms about paying. So he will struggle like this until maybe he gets a raise or a better job. He is fine with that.

Not too long ago it was time to see the kids. NO.

She said she was going to call the cops and he stuck around. They never showed up, I doubt she ever called. I told him he should've called. He has had almost too much restraint in this matter. From what I remember, even non-payment of child support DOES NOT negate visitation rights in Ohio.

He kept his cool. That was good. Now comes a notice from child support threatening him with suspension of his license. Then comes the actual notice from the BMV. Turns out his employer is taking out the $95 per week, but not sending it in.

Now today, he tells me that he works with a guy with the same situation.

I really can't sit still on this one. It is in my core to at least do something. I have a Jewish lawyer, perhaps I should call him. This may be a new avenue of getting things straightened out a bit in this country.

I firmly believe that if you can drive right they should let you, if you can't well..... It should be tied to your ability and commitment to driving safely, not if someboby else failed to write a check. I tried to tell him to get another job, don't let them withold, and pay it in cash to her. I guess it has alot more chance of getting there, he hasn't seen his kids in awhile.

To me, this is evidence that the government is out to destroy us. Everything they do is so convoluted, twisted even. Every thing I see is counterproductive, and this driver's license for child support thing is but the latest of a glaring example.

Don't pay ? They prove you have the ability to pay, lockup. In jail. Drive home. Drive drunk ? spend years in jail, but drive home. This driving is a priveledge crap is just that, crap. Everybody else can do this but them, why ?

That, my friends, is called a bill of attainder and is prohibited by the Constitution. OK, that's expired, but what to do now. We need to cook these crooks who are keeping these funds away from their intended recipients. That is the deal right now. We'll fix the Constitution some other time.

With the quality Dad time lost, there is a tangible loss. Is there anything in tort law to make it actionable, beyond just the amount misdirected and interest ? Involvement in a child's development is something that can never be compensated. The time is now.

I want to rant, just what are they doing suspending licenses over debt, no matter how important, that has nothing to do with driving ? I can understand it if there is a civil judgement for damages, but this is not relevant. I realize too many people just keep making babies, but this is not the case here. This guy actually paid and someone 'lost' the money.

This problem might be bigger than supected, it could turn into a class action if there are more involved. See this guy is working through a temp agency. That is who the suit would be directed against. They have alot of people on the rolls. This could be big.

I shall not make this longer, and I appreciate any good advice.

Thanks in advance.

T
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 4:49:42 PM   
feastie


Posts: 1793
Joined: 6/4/2004
Status: offline 		Actually, the employer is obligated by law to send the funds to the appropriate county for disbursement.  The Ohio State Attorney General's office should be notified of the employer and the gentleman in question should certainly contact that office to offer proof that his wages were indeed garnished.  It should show on his check stub.

In Texas, defaulting on child support payments does not exclude one from child visitation.  I don't understand the license thing myself.  If my children's father is unable to drive, how will he get to work in order to be able to pay his child support? (If, by some miracle, he actually worked and paid child support.)  He's around 20,000 in arrears at the moment and I suppose I could have him arrested (if we knew where he was), and have his butt tossed in jail, but to what end?  The kids still won't benefit from child support because he still won't be able to make the payments. 

I wish your friend the best of luck.  I know it's a tough road.



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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 4:53:26 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline 		Can't help you but I'm curious to know why you mentioned that your lawyer is Jewish? What does that have to do with anything?

Celeste

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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 5:02:39 PM   
NastyDaddy


Posts: 957
Joined: 9/8/2004
Status: offline 		You may have answered your own question T. In stating your friend is in a low paying job and willing to stick it out until a raise comes, I'd guess he hasn't been there that long yet. Since he is also working through a temp agency, another delay factor is introduced. The child support collection system working with a single employer is in itself a slow mechanism and takes a few months to get ontrack from the start time. A few letters stating the process was started on X date and the payments are in the pipeline should suffice to get the friend's license back appropriately. He should have evidence to present the DMV already anyway... a pay stub showing deductions attached to his $11 paychecks.

Far too often children of broken homes become the pawns of the parents in arguments and misunderstandings. In this case it would seem the friend could have shown his pay stubs to the ex, and given her proof the support was being withheld from his pay and visited with his child or children.

He's bound by the system which enforces support payments and has nothing to do with visitation issues, so he'll face a tough road filing petitions to contest her unwillingness to comply with the civil divorce, or pay a fleabag lawyer to do same. If he covers his bases and works through the system, he will eventually get his day in court to protest lack of allowed visitation and calls to the police at visitation times... which will possibly add up to harrassment or civil disobedience (in the eyes of the judge) on her part, esp if documented by redundant false police reports.
    

(in reply to Termyn8or)
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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 5:02:52 PM   
Bearlee


Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
Status: offline 		Wierd huh...sad story, but I lost interest as soon as she mentioned her lawyer like that.  <shakes head>

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 5:17:34 PM   
slaverosebeauty


Posts: 1941
Joined: 12/12/2004
From: Cali
Status: offline 		My exhusband has NOT seen our [my] son in OVER 3 1/2 years and only this year did his wages start getting garnished. I doubt he will ever see our son and I hope he doesn't.

Its nice to see men who WANT to see their kids and who do pay child support.

If his boss is taking $95 outof his check per week and NOT sending it in, then the employer is breaking the law and if he is reported can go to jail, its a federal offense if I remember correctly.  Contact a lawyer and explain or he can go to legal services if you have that in your state and tell them what is going and thy may be able to help; or just call in an anonmymous tip to 'child support services' and tell them about the employer's embezzlement, they will ask for his records and for him to show PROOF that he tookt he money out and sent it in, if he doesn't have it, then HE will be in trouble and NOT your friend.

Good luck.

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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 5:39:47 PM   
SilverWulf


Posts: 196
Joined: 4/7/2005
Status: offline 		This is a tough situation, I sympathize.

The only advise I can think of off the top of my head is for this friend of yours to take his pay stubs to the child support office and show them the deductions.  That may help.  If the child support enforcement division (CSED) there is anything like it is here, it may not.

I had a hell of a time with CSED about a year and a half ago.  I changed jobs, the previous employer had been taking out support every month for better than 5 years, there was never a missed payment.  When I changed jobs I called the county CSED to inform them of the new employer.  I was told over the phone that the State monitored employers and would notify the county when they got the information.  I called the State, and was told it was the responsibility of the employer to notify the State regarding new employees.  I talked to the HR Dept. at my new employer and was told they had in fact notified the State and that everything was taken care of.  I called the Family Support Registry to find out how to make the payments in the interem, and was told that I didn't need to worry, it would all be taken care of through deductions. 

The first month went by, no deductions.  Second month, no deductions.  I played phone roulette with all the different departments, State and county, being told multiple times not to worry, that it just takes time to make it through the system.  Another month passed with no deductions.  A few days later I get a letter from CSED threatening drivers license suspension, another from the State saying the suspension was pending.

My job requires me to drive a company vehicle, I have a class A CDL.  What I do pays *very* well. 

So, off I go on another round of phone jeapordy, with no success.  I try calling FSR again, and once again get told I cannot pay directly, in the State I live all payments come from deductions.

A week later I notice the first deduction come out of a paycheck.  I'm breathing easier, I think it's all taken care of.  I kept an eye on the pay stubs, noticing regular deductions over the next month.  Suddenly, I get another letter in the mail from DMV notifying me of suspension, for arrears.  I call CSED, and get told "you're three months behind, of course you were suspended".  At this point I blow a gasket (not the best idea).  I offered to pay the three months arrears to catch up, and was told that yes, that would get me back in good standing.  BUT, they would require another three months of regular payments before they would reinstate my license. 

It did no good to explain to CSED that my job required driving.  They couldn't have cared less, or have been less accomodating.  Over five years of perfectly on time payments meant nothing. The bitch at CSED told me, in not so many words, to find another job.  Oh, and the 'work' license... is not available for CDL holders.

Finally, I was able to speak with the supervisor at the CSED office.  Luckily, the calls I had made in the previous months were logged and verifiable.  We eventually reached an agreement so I could get my license back, but only by paying a full year of support.  The problem was, in the three weeks it took to straighten this out I had lost my job.  My employer was not interested in taking me back after this ordeal.  Other employers in the area would not offer me employment after seeing a suspension so recent on my record, regarless of the reason. 

After searching for a job for over two months I finally found an employer in a neighboring state willing to take me on.  Up to this point I had never even thought of moving.  I was forced to leave my family and friends behind all because of that fucking bitch at CSED being so unreasonable.

I still can't figure out how it is the laws got passed allowing CSED to take away a drivers license.  It makes absolutely no sense.  If I can't drive, I can't work, and if I can't work I sure as hell can't pay.  Don't even think 'get another job that doesn't require driving'.  Not going to happen.  Without a degree, there is no other job that pays as well, period.

Ok, enough of my rant, I could go on and on.

(in reply to Termyn8or)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 6:14:56 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		My exhubby did not pay for years and years and years UNTIL they threatened to yank his license.. then like magic he found the money to pay. He has even grown up since then and pays on time even now. It took 14 years for him to get to that point.

I never denied him access to his son.


Marriages fail, and it is a sad thing. I noted that there were people that recommended he hide his income from his children by working under the table. I am glad he had enough honor he did not do that, because that is what it is... honor. You have sex, you have babies, you pay for them. How many single mothers have trouble paying childcare, health insurance, mortgage, food, and car payments to keep their kids???? Many of them without a dime of childsupport? (raises hand here). and I never complained to anyone about it, he is my son, I pay his way, I am responsible...waaaaaa fucking waaaaa to your friend. Sorry,, but I do not have much sympathy for someone that does not make sure their kids get the check, they owe it to their kids. If I do not pay for my son's food they would lock me up for child neglect (as they should!) Failure to pay childsupport is a form of child neglect.

You have to not pay for a long time before they yank your license, ask my ex,... he got away with it for a decade before they even threatened him!

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(in reply to Termyn8or)
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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 6:34:56 PM   
EarthGoddess52


Posts: 70
Joined: 12/13/2005
Status: offline 		Guess I'll add my story to all this.  I was hoping other experiences would give me a clue as to how to expedite things in my case.

My ex-husband is #90,000+ in arrears to "our" children.  Both children are over 18, so the case is inactive.  It's just a matter of paying off the arrearages.  There is another child (not mine) who is under 18.  That case is still active, so any money received goes to satisfy those obligations first.  I get what's left.  The interest on the arrearages is over $300/month and that's just about what I get each month.  My children don't live with me.  They've graduated high school and are working and living on their own.  It was tough when they were younger.  Even though I always worked, they heard "No" a lot because there was just not enough money for extras.
My ex is remarried and everything is in his wife's name and CSED cannot touch a spouse's assets.  Not even a tax return.  I suspect his driver's license gets renewed because he has an agreement with CSED and is paying "something"  I've talked with several lawyers in my home state who tell me there's nothing they can do because he's out of state and has no property to attach.
If anyone has any suggestions, I'd be very interested.  Thanks.

(in reply to juliaoceania)
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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 6:57:43 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		My ex rarely calls his son or comes to see him!  And I have always told him that he could see his son anytime he wanted too.  He even told me that he is happier now, that he doesnt have to worry about anyone else but himself.  And to think that I was married to such a selfish man for 30 yrs....oh! dont get me started..lol

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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 7:10:41 PM   
SirKenin


Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

Can't help you but I'm curious to know why you mentioned that your lawyer is Jewish? What does that have to do with anything?

Celeste


Jewish lawyers are incredibly effective and sharp as a tack.  They have a certain infamy about them.

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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 7:13:28 PM   
SirKenin


Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline 		The driver's license idea is a good idea to catch deadbeat dads.  I do agree with it.  Unfortunately I guess some unwittingly fall in the cracks.  That is not the system's fault though.  That is the fault of the employer.  I think you may have misdirected your frustrations there a little bit.

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Wicca: Pretending to be an ancient religion since 1956

Catholic Church: Serving up guilt since 107 AD.

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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 9:29:58 PM   
MistressLorelei


Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline 		In my opinion, a father who isn't responsible enough to do all he can to ensure that his children can eat, isn't responsible enough to drive, etc.  If he needs a license to get to work, then he is getting a paycheck and should be paying child support. I don't feel sorry for anyone who isn't taking care of their children.  It's a shame that in some cases, the only reason the father does pay is to keep his driver's license.  There are many diligent divorced dads, but sadly, there are far too many deadbeats out there as well. 

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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 9:38:16 PM   
ElectraGlide


Posts: 1246
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: Maryland
Status: offline 		In my opinion, a father who isn't responsible enough to do all he can to ensure that his children can eat is definitley not responsible enough to be a DOM.

(in reply to MistressLorelei)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 9:48:07 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Only among racists.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirKenin

Jewish lawyers are incredibly effective and sharp as a tack.  They have a certain infamy about them.

(in reply to SirKenin)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 9:51:00 PM   
Wulfchyld


Posts: 2618
Joined: 12/7/2005
Status: offline 		OP, handing the X cash is a very bad idea. Sounds like she is a little malicious, cant see the kids, I’m calling the cops, and if he hands over cash he will have no record of payment. He is obviously trying to do the right thing and needs to make sure he has records of the right thing being done. In the memo box, have him write in "child support payment".
 As for losing the drivers license… it is another classic shooting in the foot scenario. The great government think tank is obviously full of vodka.

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RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 10:25:35 PM   
Termyn8or


Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline 		She mentioned her lawyer ?

Umm if you meant me, it is H/he. No offense taken.

When you persue a monetary case, a Jewish lawyer is usually best. If it is a criminal case Italian or German. If you are fighting city hall, Irish, or related. That is the way it is.

Every Race has traits, on average, Jews are much more intelligent usually. What you need to understand is that you not only need a litigatious lawyer, you need one who is in the good graces of the court where you are to appear.

If I call a Jewish lawyer for a case like this, of course because I am a racist. Another nail in my coffin is if I get caught with a gun. Now is not the time for Eckstien, I need Fabrizzi. If I want to build in violation of city codes, I need Coughlin.

Different people have different abilities. We should savor our differences, not ignore them. This is how I run my life, and I am not asking for donations, except for the club I want to build. That is for another thread. That wouldn't be a donation anyway.

So anyway, you take offense that I called someone Jewish ? Since when did that become an insult ?

I appreciate the responses and will respond, but I wanted to deal with this first.

We have French, Swiss, Chinese, Lebonese, African, Hispanics in about 12 varieties. There are more, lots more.

If you are born in the US, you have all the same rights as me. Please help me protect mine and I will help you protect yours. Tit for tat.

Yup, I think the Jewish lawyer is the best choice for this case. Problem is he will cost money. Actually he is reasonable with my ilk and me. This is the guy that I would choose for this case, and I am a winner. Can someone explain the offense ?

Anybody involved in any serious shit needs three lawyers. a money lawyer, a dope lawyer and a Woman lawyer. Do not misuse your tools.

T

(in reply to Bearlee)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 10:48:20 PM   
NastyDaddy


Posts: 957
Joined: 9/8/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Termyn8or
When you persue a monetary case, a Jewish lawyer is usually best.


The case of this thread deals with driver's license suspensions and refused visitation rights, not money, or did I miss something?.


 

(in reply to Termyn8or)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 11:08:36 PM   
SirKenin


Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Only among racists.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirKenin

Jewish lawyers are incredibly effective and sharp as a tack.  They have a certain infamy about them.



No.. Nice try.  I know you are trying to make a jab, but you should choose a more appropriate post to do it in, where you will actually stand a chance of making an effective, factual point.

There is nothing racist about admiring the skills of Jewish lawyers.  They are damn good at what they do and worth every cent.  Jewish people also make fantastic accountants and are highly respected in their field, for good reason.  They know their jewelry too.  I have nothing but respect for them, although I was not too crazy about dealing with them as wholesalers.  I find the Chinese do a better job at that.

For different matters, as mentioned, different lawyers are effective.  I have a fantastic family law lawyer who is a white anglo-saxon.  He is in the good graces of the Court and is very deadly.  I have never lost a case with him and always gotten whatever I wanted, even when he thought it could not be done.

So you see, your comment was completely misguided and born out of bitterness.  That is fine, but choose your outlet wisely.

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Hi. I don't care. Thanks.

Wicca: Pretending to be an ancient religion since 1956

Catholic Church: Serving up guilt since 107 AD.

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Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Child support - 5/20/2006 11:19:44 PM   
xxmstrchasxx


Posts: 423
Joined: 5/9/2006
Status: offline 		I had a friend that the very same thing happened to.  He took his check stub to the court and showed them where it was being taken out and then they got on the employer because he didn't send it in.

I was living in California and was paying child support in Ohio and California both to two different women.  I went to court and told the judge my child support was more than what I was making.  He said you're right, you better get a part time job too. LMAO


< Message edited by xxmstrchasxx -- 5/20/2006 11:22:04 PM >

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