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Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 10:31:57 AM   
MasterG2kTR


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Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers

This is absolutely priceless and the best idea I've seen yet!!
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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 10:36:44 AM   
Lockit


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I tell them I had a guy tied to my bed and we were having great sex and ask why they interrupted me at a time like this. They have no clue how to respond to the details I give them. Most never call back. One called back just to make sure I said what I said with a buddy listening.

I do make sure they are a frequent caller before I do that though.


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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 10:43:50 AM   
Hillwilliam


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My favorite one is by Carl Hurley.

He would let a telemarketer go for a minute then he would say "Guess what? Tomorrow, I get to ride in a police car and then we're gonna go get some ice cream. I have to show em where the bodies are first tho"


CLICK!!!

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 10:44:12 AM   
Termyn8or


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That sounds like another Tom Mabe.

T^T

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 11:07:31 AM   
HeatherMcLeather


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Or you could do what I do "Sorry, I'm not interested, good luck on your next call. Bye" and then hang up.

It really isn't necessary to be an asshole to some poor Joe or Jane  who is just trying to make a living doing the only job they could find. You don't think they really want to be doing that do you? Have you ever spoken to somebody who does telemarketing, asked them how fast they would take another job if they found one?

I didn't think so.

People who do this sort of thing are selfish and ignorant. I don't often get really annoyed at people, but I'm sorry, this mindset is simply revolting. They should be ashamed of them selves. I sincerely hope they all loose their jobs and can find no way to pay their bills or feed themselves other than an endless string of telemarketing jobs. Maybe then they'll learn a little empathy.

People like this disgust me, especially since they can get their number put on a no-call list with no real effort. People are always telling me I'm too young and naive, that I don't have an adult's attitude or experience, well if this is the way adults behave, then I don't ever want to be one. I'll stick with young and naive, thank you very much.


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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 11:21:17 AM   
Lockit


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While I can agree with you Heather... I get the same callers (many times) and same companies, constantly. Those I will stop after I have asked them repeatedly to stop calling. I won't go on the do not call list because there are some calls I would like to get.

Just this week, vonage has called me every frigging day. The cruise ship has been a constant. Insurance companies, cable companies, do this to save our officers they need vests shit. They will stop calling from one state when I ask them to stop and will call from another state the next day. I try being nice and if that doesn't work... too bad. If an innocent caller gets caught in it... I am sorry, it is part of the job and they can hang up. However.. I am not working or getting paid for their abuse. At least they get paid or convinced they will be paid.


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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 11:24:21 AM   
Hillwilliam


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I can't get on the no call list here at the office (commercial numbers not allowed on it). There is one company that calls me at least 3 times/week. I have told them repeatedly to stop calling. Many times, I am either on the phone with clients or meeting face to face with clients when those people call.

After being nice to them and requesting they not call again a half dozen times, the fuckers are fair game.

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 11:28:19 AM   
mnottertail


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Tell them that they already called and you already bought it just two minutes ago.

Tell them that the guy is in prison for raping a little old lady and offer them a prison number to reach him.

Tell them you are filing bankruptcy.

Tell them you are under federal indictment for moneylaundering and kiddie porn.

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 11:35:06 AM   
VirginPotty


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Heather,
I can understand your feelings but what you might fail to realize is that the majority of these telemarketers sales are bull crap.
I used to work for one that called to collect donations to the Fallen Police/Firefighter's fund and only about 10% went to the cause & 90% went to the guy pockets whose basement we were working out of.  I quit after a week and didn't even pick up my paycheck. It disgusted me so much.

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 11:43:06 AM   
myotherself


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I'm on a "no call" list and they still keep calling.

So I try to sell them stuff.

Them: "hi, am I speaking to the householder?"
Me: "yes you are"
Them: "I was calling about your home insurance"
Me: "do you have a large garden?"
Them: "errrmmm...who is your current insurance provider?"
Me: "it's a complete pain having to mow large gardens with an ordinary mower, isn't it?"
Them: "well, it can be...but about your insurance..."
Me: "ever thought about buying one of those ride-upon mowers?"


...and so on. Even sold one once.

Maybe I should be in sales

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 12:13:43 PM   
NuevaVida


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Myotherself, that's hilarious!

Back in pre-cell phone and pre-caller ID days, telemarketers would always call during dinner time, and you'd have to hang up on them because they would not stop talking.  Even as a youngster, I saw them as an uninvited intruder (not that intruders are typically invited). 

Now that I have a cell phone, I just don't answer calls from numbers I don't recognize. 


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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 12:18:57 PM   
HeatherMcLeather


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FR
Sorry to hear how horrible it is for you to get some phone calls, but it still isn't the fault of the poor schmuck making the call. If it really is an inconvenience, just hang up. Your excuses are just excuses to be mean to somebody who is less fortunate than you. They have no option but to take it, most of them will get in trouble if they hang up.

You say it's a bother and a waste of your time. Well then, why do you waste even more time trying to mess with them? If your time really is so precious, then I would think that you can find a better way to spend it than harassing some schmuck who's life already sucks. Way to kick a dog when it's down, I hope you are all proud of yourselves. Way to go, personally, you make me want to puke.

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 12:28:41 PM   
Lockit


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Then go puke. You can always go hang up on us.

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 12:32:49 PM   
Arpig


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I did, but then again your posts tend to have that effect on me.


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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 12:33:36 PM   
MistressDarkArt


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Can the guy doing it get in trouble for impersonating 911?

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 12:33:48 PM   
NuevaVida


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I feel the same way about solicitors who show up at my door uninvited.  It's their job to interject themselves to my personal space and it's my prerogative to react to that.

I, however, don't bother with 'em.  I don't answer the calls and I don't answer the door to people I don't know.  I like my personal space - my home is my place of respite - and I resent people who decide it's OK to intrude on that.


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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 12:34:04 PM   
VirginPotty


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^^^What Lockit said^^^

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 12:35:42 PM   
VirginPotty


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

Can the guy doing it get in trouble for impersonating 911?


No, the telemarketers that I worked w/pretended to be cops.  The only thing they couldn't pretend to be was with the FOP (Fraternal Order of Police). 

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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 12:37:22 PM   
NuevaVida


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

Can the guy doing it get in trouble for impersonating 911?


I wondered this, too.

This actually reminds me - sidebar story - Years ago my home number was the same number as a resort hotel in Monterey, except the resort's was an 800 number.  Sillies living in CA didn't realize that just because they were in the same area code didn't mean they did NOT have to dial "800" first, so we'd get lots of calls from people looking to make reservations.  It was annoying because the calls would come any time of day or night.

Once, just for fun, I answered the phone, "Monterey Resort Hotel" and sure enough, someone wanted to make a reservation.  I was half tempted to pretend to take it (hmm, and get their Visa number) but I couldn't be that mean.  I started impatiently telling people, though, that 800 numbers still require the person to actually dial "800", no matter where they lived.


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RE: Best Way to Mess with Telemarketers - 8/23/2011 12:40:28 PM   
myotherself


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I see your point, but then again these people have chosen to be representatives of the companies that are choosing to abuse the 'do not call' directive.

It may be a crappy job, and it may not be the best job in the world, but it is their choice. They are the ones who are calling me, and as such they ARE the company.

You may say they are only the poor schmuck who is paid peanuts to make these endless calls, and to an extent I sympathise. But the question then becomes who IS the company? I have tried (in the case of 2 regular "offenders") to get higher up the food chain to bollock the people with the power. But the reps who call me do not give me that choice. "Sorry, but there is no manager available" is the usual response.

So after multiple annoying calls (one of them only minutes after the death of my father), I choose to waste their time as much as they choose to waste mine. Hopefully these wasted calls will eventually resonate with the "higher ups" until they figure out that some of us do things properly, make our feelings about cold calls known, and yet are treated like our (legal) wishes are unimportant.

Until that time, I shall respond to them in kind.


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