RE: Unread Messages

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Unread Messages

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Unread Messages

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 5 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 8:10:40 AM

Kana

Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JanMikal

I have been a member of this site for a bit; not for years, I don't think, but for a decent amount of time. For some reason, I have a number of messages that I have sent people that are labelled as 'unread'. Not 'deleted unread' or 'read and then deleted', but simply unread at all. A quick check shows that the recipient has been online recently, but there my message sits, still unread - can someone explain to me why this would be? Are there people out there who simply let unread messages sit in their boxes? I do, /really/ I do understand that subs, especially attractive female subs, get mountains of mail, but to simply let a message sit, unread, undeleted, unresponded...seems peculiar to me.

Thank you all for your replies in advance.

See what happens when ya don't lead with the cock shot?
:-)

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to JanMikal)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 9:59:23 AM

Sundowner

Posts: 2549
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline

A cock shot and "kneel bitch" - give them some text to work on.

(I suppose the sensible thing would be to set up a sock account as a pretty young thing and to experience what it's like getting 200 mails from males each day - it'd put the debate in context).

(in reply to Kana)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 10:02:25 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

SD? You never did that to me. I now feel deprived.

*sobs*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Sundowner)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 10:32:56 AM

Sundowner

Posts: 2549
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

SD? You never did that to me. I now feel deprived.

*sobs*

I knew a cock shot would overwhelm you and that text would tire your brain so you'd have ended up completely fucked. It would be discourteous to fuck you in any way other than caringly dear lady.

Your nose is dribbling, please cease sobbing and wipe it.

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 10:41:31 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

SunnyD's a giver!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to Sundowner)

Profile

Post #: 45

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 11:02:55 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

SD? You never did that to me. I now feel deprived.

*sobs*

I knew a cock shot would overwhelm you and that text would tire your brain so you'd have ended up completely fucked. It would be discourteous to fuck you in any way other than caringly dear lady.

Your nose is dribbling, please cease sobbing and wipe it.

*grabs tissue, wipes*

but.. but...

if only I had known then!!

(I adore you, nonetheless, evil wicked man!)

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Sundowner)

Profile

Post #: 46

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 12:00:15 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

1. Some people "hover" and read the first few lines before opening letters. If it's nothing except "Hi" or "Wanna fuck?" they might leave it unread.

2. Or, they might hover and then wait to actually open it until they're ready to spend time answering cmails.

3. Maybe their bulk mail is set so their bulk parameters include you and they ignore their bulk.

4. Some people read the profile before reading the letter. If you happen to be just what s/he said s/he did NOT want, you've shown yourself to ignore what s/he wants, so s/he may be ignoring YOU.

5. If you ignore what s/he said she's looking for, s/he may feel that you would ignore a safeword and then s/he would feel unsafe, so ignores you.

6. Sometimes, if a person perceives the tone of the cmail to be rude or disrespectful when hovering, she will ignore it.

All that being said, I do hover and, if #1 is the case, I will not answer, and I say that in my profile as well. However I will delete the letters so they don't waste space in my Inbox. Otherwise, I will reply in some fashion.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to JanMikal)

Profile

Post #: 47

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 1:24:38 PM

shylilbear

Posts: 125
Joined: 11/25/2011
Status: offline

It doesn't really matter why your messages aren't being read so here's a suggestion for you. Quit whining about it, grow up a little bit, pull your big boys pants on, shrug your shoulders and move on. All this time you're wasting complaining about your messages not being read could be put towards writing other messages to women that probably WILL read them.

I can just about bet though that with the whining, sniveling, I'm being ignored attitide in your OP isn't going to encourage more women to want to read your messages.

Either that or it's a conspiracy. We've all gotten together in a secret meeting and agreed to never read your messages.

_____________________________

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
One who gains strength by overcoming obstacles possesses the only strength which can overcome adversity.
To err is human, to really fuck things up takes a computer.

(in reply to JanMikal)

Profile

Post #: 48

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 1:37:56 PM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

It is less work as in less clicks to simply leave unwanted incoming mail than to open it and delete it. Whether they have a mountain of mail and limited time or just taking the lazy way of dealing with the mail, I imagine that is your answer.

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to JanMikal)

Profile

Post #: 49

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 3:19:01 PM

hellionsLight

Posts: 241
Joined: 10/18/2011
From: Kearney, NE
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX

because theyre not reading them, and havent deleted them. And dont want to read them.

Simple answer, eh? I can't read into it more than this.

(in reply to JanahX)

Profile

Post #: 50

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 3:39:07 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner

I'm assuming in all this that the lady's profile has a marker showing her to be "Actively Seeking" else why would you complain about the absence of reply.

Sorry ladies - so many of you bleat out your standard comments - "we get so many messages we don't have time to read them" or the facile "if we don't reply it clearly means we're not interested".

But concerning those who invite contact but don't reply to messages which meet their published criteria - console yourself JanMikal, they are but worthless sluts, fakes of the worst kind (they possibly do not foam at the mouth because they weren't taught to brush their teeth the way the nice ladies do, so they have bad breath as well; and they're probably ugly too). Be pleased you escaped a ghastly fate.

Sorry to say this SD, but you're way off base. I've gotten email (back when I was seeking) from guys who it would appear we might be compatible from quick perusals of the profile. But there's no way to state on a profile everything you want in a person.

Sense of humor could mean an appreciation of word play. But then you get guys who believe it means the Three Stooges is the epitome of humor. Not for me.

Moreover, no guy reads "Wanted nice guy, good manners, patient, no anger management problems" and says to himself "that ain't me. I'm an asshole who chews with his mouth open. I can't keep a job because I go off the deep end every five minutes and my ex has a restraining order against me". People lie to themselves about how wonderful they are. The op is a case in point. He contradicts himself in his profile, first claiming he is polite to everyone and then puts down all subs and tells them he won't respect them when they meet.

And above all. One death threat in response to a thanks but no thanks is enough for me. I was shook for weeks at getting a long detailed account of how he was going to chase me down, and slice me slowly in two, first sticking his knife in my vagina and cutting upward.

If some guy I have never met and never want to meet considers me rude for not apologizing to him for not wanting to talk to him, so be it. That's a lot better then getting explicit death threats.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to Sundowner)

Profile

Post #: 51

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 3:46:50 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

I haven't had a death threat, but I did have a guy who was local to me tell me that if he ever saw me at a local event he was going to "Bitch slap the piss out" of me.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to DesFIP)

Profile

Post #: 52

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 4:24:23 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

I haven't had a death threat, but I did have a guy who was local to me tell me that if he ever saw me at a local event he was going to "Bitch slap the piss out" of me.

Good lord, Oside! Between that and the f*ckwad who called you 'useless' due to your cancer treatment (I was horrified, btw) it's a testament to your strength that you leave your profile open at all!

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Profile

Post #: 53

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 5:40:19 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

I'm happy with who I am and I'm married to an amazing man. The good people that I've met far out weigh the idiots that come across. When I get guys like this, I just remind myself that the message is the result of their issues, not mine.

The guy who threatened to slap me probably got a surprise anyway. He was in the Navy, so we contacted the local CO.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)

Profile

Post #: 54

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 6:24:05 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

At least for me, there were many many months that might go by without my reading mail. Why? One, I wasn't looking for a relationship or even casual play. Not everyone on the other side are there because they are seeking. I was there because I used to run a group and one of my members wanted me to check something out. It was only after posting a profile on the other side that I found out about the BETTER side.. forums. where it does not matter that you are not looking. Eventually I dumped the profile there because it was useless. And what do you know.. lol there was 3 or 4 unread that just sat when I closed that account.

quote:

ORIGINAL: JanMikal

But that isn't what I am talking about; I am talking about, for example, the fact that I sent a message in, say, November, the person in question has been online as recently as February, but it's still unread. Not DELETED unread, but unread ENTIRELY. As in, sitting there, unread, for some months without being either deleted or somehow read and/or responded to.

< Message edited by Missokyst -- 2/11/2012 6:33:07 PM >

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to JanMikal)

Profile

Post #: 55

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 7:13:56 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

quote:

The guy who threatened to slap me probably got a surprise anyway. He was in the Navy, so we contacted the local CO.

Good for you!

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Profile

Post #: 56

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 8:19:06 PM

leatherlaceglove

Posts: 13
Joined: 1/8/2012
Status: offline

That is sooo true. When I first signed up, the first hour I had 28 messages. I got back on the next evening and had .. around 52. For our side it can be a bit overwhelming to get online and see so many eager to touch base with you. Not a complaint, by any means.....just a different perspective on things.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Some possibilities:

1. They DO get mountains of mail and choose to respond only to those they already know.
2. Your messages are somehow being screened out (age, too far away, gender, etc.), and goes to bulk mail.
3. The recipients simply "hover" their cursor over your message without reading it and decide it's not worth reading.

Don't take it personally.

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Profile

Post #: 57

RE: Unread Messages - 2/11/2012 11:35:49 PM

Sundowner

Posts: 2549
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

...

Sorry to say this SD, but you're way off base. I've gotten email (back when I was seeking) from guys who it would appear we might be compatible from quick perusals of the profile. But there's no way to state on a profile everything you want in a person.

Sense of humor could mean an appreciation of word play. But then you get guys who believe it means the Three Stooges is the epitome of humor. Not for me.

...

My beef is with situations where:

1. The profile invites contact (Actively Seeking),
2. The writer has read the profile and is interested,
3. The writer meets any specified criteria (age, location, life goals - whatever),
4. The writer writes a personal note, and
5. The lady does not reply.

Over the years I've occasionally messaged people, in every case on the basis above. And hey - I've made friends that way; and I've had a few "thanks but no thanks" replies. "No thanks" seems to me to be so entirely reasonable I can't conceive of writing further either with abuse or with an attempt to change a mind.

(Apart from GT of course, who keeps saying no to my "kneel bitch" messages for some reason - unbelievable - so the only possible response is to explain to her that she's fake).

But I've also had occasions of no reply to a courteous letter; I find that ill-mannered in the extreme when contact was invited.

I think I stand by my hissy fit. And if you're saying above that you simply didn't reply when you received a message from someone who apparently met all your criteria but just in a dull way and you weren't interested then in my book that's ill-mannered.

(Sorry DesFIP, I just love the wagging finger opportunities - doesn't mean I don't love you loads).

Experience may have taught you that often a "no thanks" may trigger abuse; well I find that distressing and I sympathise. But life is, at times, hard; good manners can help us deal with that.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Profile

Post #: 58

RE: Unread Messages - 2/12/2012 12:01:31 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

quote:

(Apart from GT of course, who keeps saying no to my "kneel bitch" messages for some reason - unbelievable - so the only possible response is to explain to her that she's fake).

Hey! that floor is friggin COLD!!!

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Sundowner)

Profile

Post #: 59

RE: Unread Messages - 2/12/2012 12:07:32 AM

Sundowner

Posts: 2549
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

quote:

(Apart from GT of course, who keeps saying no to my "kneel bitch" messages for some reason - unbelievable - so the only possible response is to explain to her that she's fake).

Hey! that floor is friggin COLD!!!

Fact of the day: I am a failed dom - I always make subs kneel on a cushion; I looove the kneeling thing on so many levels but I can't handle the idea of bare knees on a cold hard floor.

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Profile

Post #: 60