quote:

ORIGINAL: MissImmortalPain

Yay for clarity.

"Why is there so little evidence or discussion or example of the......compliant male eager to please his wife, who ends up being cuckolding by her, against all of his natural instincts?"

^ This leads to another question. What makes you believe it is against the natural instincts of man to take part in ths sort of realationship? You said you believe your hubbys upbringing has a lot to do with how he feels. That would not be instinct that would be something he was taught. As for why there are so few examples of men acting as if they are doing something they don't really agrees with I believe I said at from my point of view that the many men that do take part in this would rather not speak about it openly. I think they may do this because many expect men to act one way, and only one way, and they feel others might judge them.

"Why does there seem to be mostly one extreme or the other?"

^I think that there seems to be one extreme or the other because many say they want to take part when they really never have. The prono effect you might say. Men dreaming about something then when they have had it happen they hate it or love it. As with many complex realationships there is rarely middle ground.

"Am I and my situation a rarity or is it just simply rarely discussed and kept more private in peoples personal lives for others?"

I believe I answered this as well. No, you and your hubby aren't all that rare. What is rare is that you want to share your experiences with others. For most it is a very personal realationship do to all the very complex things one must do to keep this sort of realationship in any sort of order where both people have what they need to be happy. You, it seems, are a writter. Many writters wish to share their lives with others. Few other people wish to expose their lives to the world.

I would also like to ask, and have to assume, that the realationship you have with your hubby is the only time you have had anything to do with cockolding? Have you not had the chance to know others that use this as a part of their realationship? If you speak to others that use this you may find that there are many ways in which to work it as part of a realationship. That not everyone who does it does it in the same manner.

quote:

CollarMe really does not change much. You leave for a year, come back, bring up topics that elsewhere are addressed with intelligent replies and numerous participants.
Here? No serious discussion, just random attacks, egos, arguing, assaults, followed with moderator favortism. How sad, lol.

quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

Frankly, I think all men have conflicts with submission and kink. Its not cool to be gay. Its not cool to be whipped. (Physically or metaphorically.) Its not cool to cross dress. On balance, I think its an extra-big step for a man not kink-predisposed to cuckoldry to engage in it. My question to you is, why does he have an erection and feel revulsion? (Is this accurate to how he feels?)

Maybe this is similar to pain and arousal. What are your thoughts?

quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland

To the others, check out my new profile pic. :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland

To the others, check out my new profile pic. :)

Much improved, thank you. You know us women: show us an ass and we think you're an ass. This time we got a little back out of it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009

Vanessa Chaland,
I guess I'm a bit confused by your post. What you posted was not really a question. It's a direct cut and paste from your blog. So were you intending to establish a conversation with the other members of this forum, or were you trying to market your blog?

LadyPact attempted to begin a dialogue with you, and you rebuffed her multiple times. I think you believe that you "won" that encounter. But you didn't. You came off as a jerk, while LadyPact took the high road and continued to try to discuss the topic with you despite your rude retorts.

This happens to be a kink that I have some experience with. Moreover, I enjoy talking about it. But this thread doesn't seem inviting. I don't get the sense that you want anyone's opinion. You've already said that you're an "expert", and that you've written many books and blogs. So once again I ask, "why are you here?" It seems to me that you're primarily trying to promote your website and books, but I could be wrong.

I started a thread on cuckolding that should be on the second page of the General BDSM Discussion section of this message board. If you do a search, you should be able to find it. The title was "A serious discussion on cuckolding". It was a rather long discussion, and quite a few perspectives were shared by both males and females on the topic. It may provide some of the perspectives that you're seeking.

BTW, for those who haven't read her blog, the first post in this thread is a direct lift from her blog, so it gives a good sense of what her blog is like. Here's another sampling of her work:

"It is a happy coincidence for me that in the process of all of this, you are made to feel humiliated and small, which entertains me to no end. The taste and texture of that milky looking stuff touching your lips and tongue…..just like a faggot, even though you are not one."

Yawn!

Her blog posts have creative titles like, "Dominating the cuckold like a Cuckoldress Bitch does". This is the entirety of that blog post:

"Having a busy weekend so will add posts as it goes. Lets just say there is a lot of spanking, caning, ballbusting, facesitting and Queening happening, going along with some humiliation training for my husband via my lovers thick sperm after I get fucked….each time."

Wow! Exciting! Titillating! Insightful!

The rest of that blog post contains several naked pictures of her, but no signs of any cuckolding going on.

Her websites and blogs are all marketing vehicles for her. It's like one continuous commercial. The books are self-published and so I don't think they make her the "expert" that she claims to be. And all of her sites contain lots of pictures of her. I guess she's a bit of an exhibitionist.

The thing that struck me most was that her blog entries didn't have a single comment. None! Not one! That means that her blog likely has a very small readership. Or she's writing it for her own entertainment. Any good blog receives comment. That's how blogs work.

I guess that's why she's here on CollarMe. She's trying to market her stuff. I get that. I can even respect her capitalistic desires. But most of us expect conversations when we come to a message board, not marketing pitches. But maybe that's just my way of thinking.

Good luck in your business endeavors, Vanessa. I really mean that. But I'd strongly suggest that in the future you post questions, and not just cut and paste posts from your blog. After all, there's a reason why this section of the forum is called "Ask a Mistress".

quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland

CollarMe really does not change much. You leave for a year, come back, bring up topics that elsewhere are addressed with intelligent replies and numerous participants.
Here? No serious discussion, just random attacks, egos, arguing, assaults, followed with moderator favortism. How sad, lol.

quote:

ORIGINAL: xXLithiumXx

quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland

CollarMe really does not change much. You leave for a year, come back, bring up topics that elsewhere are addressed with intelligent replies and numerous participants.
Here? No serious discussion, just random attacks, egos, arguing, assaults, followed with moderator favortism. How sad, lol.

How can you have a discussion with someone who knows everything and wants to dominate the conversation by relaying only their own out look and experience?

Did they teach you that being...wait, let me censor myself before I get another golden ticket because I was about to say some very vile things...



As to the question of her ass...

It's bony, and frankly looks like old lady ass.

I am not impressed.

Decent legs, but that could be because of the angle and the 4 inch heels...

And did she really say she practiced Scooby Doo?



Im only a page in and already I can not refrain.

Maybe I should stop for the night and let the "expert" handle having this conversation on her own. I do not know how much self discipline I am capable of....I am Malkavian after all.

quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland



I'm here. I will be posting numerous articles, posts, thoughts and ideas.

quote:

ORIGINAL: xXLithiumXx

quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland



I'm here. I will be posting numerous articles, posts, thoughts and ideas.

Thanks for the warning.

It's nice to know what not to read around here, most people who act like crazy people don't bother to warn us that they will continue to post insults or conversations that they mean to have with the voices in their heads.

quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland

Thanks! I always enjoy hearing from people, even the jealous ones. :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: xXLithiumXx

quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland

CollarMe really does not change much. You leave for a year, come back, bring up topics that elsewhere are addressed with intelligent replies and numerous participants.
Here? No serious discussion, just random attacks, egos, arguing, assaults, followed with moderator favortism. How sad, lol.

How can you have a discussion with someone who knows everything and wants to dominate the conversation by relaying only their own out look and experience?

Did they teach you that being...wait, let me censor myself before I get another golden ticket because I was about to say some very vile things...



As to the question of her ass...

It's bony, and frankly looks like old lady ass.

I am not impressed.

Decent legs, but that could be because of the angle and the 4 inch heels...

And did she really say she practiced Scooby Doo?



Im only a page in and already I can not refrain.

Maybe I should stop for the night and let the "expert" handle having this conversation on her own. I do not know how much self discipline I am capable of....I am Malkavian after all.

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

Lithi!! where've ya been??

quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland

And yet, you not only read it, but took the time to reply to it, lol. :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: xXLithiumXx

quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland



I'm here. I will be posting numerous articles, posts, thoughts and ideas.

Thanks for the warning.

It's nice to know what not to read around here, most people who act like crazy people don't bother to warn us that they will continue to post insults or conversations that they mean to have with the voices in their heads.

quote:

ORIGINAL: xXLithiumXx

Oh, Darling..I am not even close to jealous of you.

I know...It may come as a shock to you, there in that little bubble you call home...but quite frankly...you're not rare, you aren't special, and your situation is lack luster to say the least.

Your husband chokes when he thinks of anything to do with having another mans anything in his mouth because he isn't gay. You can't force him to be gay any more than we can force you to just shut the fuck up...

Basically, by forcing him you are potentially causing psychological damage that you are not responsible enough, in all of your infinite glory, to repair. In my opinion, I will be watching a true crime show one day and it will be about how your husband fed your freeze dried corpse into a wood chipper (Party at my house!) and I will shake my had and laugh because it's just another example of how karma comes back and gnaws viciously on a self important bitch like you.

So, no, I am not jealous in the least...I don't envy you even a tiny bit. I don't have to force men to do what I want them to do, they do it because they want to, and that is how I like it. It's so much nicer when they strive to please you and you don't have to waggle your non-existent grand ma pan cake ass and blue waffle in their face while making cold hearted and unrealistic demands that could potentially present a health risk to him, you and the general public.

In short, keep it in your pants, you out break monkey, and realize that if you wanted a bi cuck that you could bitch slap like a soccer ball then that's what you should have married, but don't come on here and post a bunch of bull shit plugging the same crap over and over and then get pissy when no one wants to answer your statements when you claim to be an expert. If you are an expert, then you should know the answer, why are you asking us? Go talk to yourself. You know it all.


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