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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:04:17 PM

eliotRosewster

Posts: 28
Joined: 4/8/2012
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quote:

Actually, this is when we pull out the big strapon and use that new hole well.

Why the big strap on? I got two, possibly three ass holes by now. You can use the big double headed dildo!

But yes. I'll change the way I send initial messages now.

(in reply to Lockit)

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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:07:49 PM

eliotRosewster

Posts: 28
Joined: 4/8/2012
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quote:

I just wanna know what kind of hotdog ya gonna use. That matters yanno.

I cringe at the hotdog part. I wrote it while talking to a girl about the mental aspect of submission. So the whole hot dog part came out of that. It felt weird writing it in the first place. It felt weird posting it. It still feels weird now. But I've gotten women sending messages to me out of the blue because of that fantasy. I've thought about changing it, but it works. So I've left it.

And to answer your question, Kielbasa!

(in reply to JstAnotherSub)

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Post #: 42

RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:08:10 PM

Lockit

Posts: 11292
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So maybe it was worth taking it up the ass a little bit... lol

Take it easy... many of us come back after a flamefest and survive to go on to years of posting around here.

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Post #: 43

RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:09:49 PM

eliotRosewster

Posts: 28
Joined: 4/8/2012
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quote:

If it was working for you, you wouldn't still be copying and pasting it over and over again.

I haven't been copy and pasting it.

(in reply to Kirata)

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Post #: 44

RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:10:47 PM

angelikaJ

Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: eliotRosewster

This is the second time this has happened to me. Hopefully you'll find this funny.

So I see a girl has joined the site with no profile. So I send her this message, which is similar to most of my first contact messages:

quote:

First off I need to say that I'm a gentleman. It's only when a sub submits to me that I will change. I believe that behavior is earned by the sub. Also if you expect me to say "Bow down to my glorious cock!" you will be disappointed.

Now with that out of the way. Tell me more about yourself. What are you looking for on here? A 24/7 TPE? A long term equal relationship? Random play partners?

She replies back with:

quote:

lol, whatever...I'm not interested in little boys with attitude and bad manners and no respect...ciao

I go to reply back to her to ask her where I was rude, and she has me blocked! I think I need to change my initial message to "CAN YOU READ AT A GRADE 5 READING LEVEL!?!"

eliotR,
It would have been a clever first email by you if you had a shot of a rooster as your main photo.
Instead you mention your genitalia in the first paragraph and wonder why she thought your email was rude.
Would you mention your cock to a cute woman at the grocery store?

The context, as I understand it is to say that you aren't one of those "kneel, slut" jerks that so many women run into. But to say that you aren't while still mentioning the action gives us a visual we just don't want to think about.
If you don't mention it, we will likely figure it out on our own, and it might even give us something to take notice of or compliment you on.

The way you are presenting yourself now is at worst presenting an incongruity between your words and your behavior and at best is ambiguous re: your meaning.

As for this: I go through the new users and I'll usually message them. I find newer users to be less jaded.

New users tend to be a bit wide-eyed and naive.
That is different than less jaded although experience does tend to have that effect.
Don't be someone who is part and parcel of why someone becomes jaded.

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Post #: 45

RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:11:30 PM

Lockit

Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: eliotRosewster

quote:

If it was working for you, you wouldn't still be copying and pasting it over and over again.

I haven't been copy and pasting it.

I think you're missing his point. If it was really working for you, you wouldn't have to be emailing so many others. (That was my take on it anyway.)

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Post #: 46

RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:14:27 PM

tj444

Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: eliotRosewster

quote:

If you are having many great conversations then one rejection should not bother you so..

No, one rejection doesn't bother me. Usually if I get a response it will be from a girl that is interested. This was just the total opposite of what I'm used to. Usually a girl will be very open. She might question that I'm a gentleman but that's perfectly fine, and we usually go off and have a great conversation from there.

I'm still somewhat new to this site. I've only been on 3 dates and they went ok. It could've been 4 dates, but I found out the girl was married and I changed my mind on that one.

Of course she isnt what you are used to, she has (imo) been thru this before and know all the tricks guys use, her view is much like most of the posters on this thread.. You are going after young girls that likely have no experience at this, let alone life.. so to a certain degree (until they catch on), they will talk to you and even meet you..

One thing that bothers me about your profile (besides all the fantasy stuff and posturing & as another has pointed out, no vanilla interests listed),.. is that you dont say what kind of relationship YOU want.. but you ask them what they are looking for in your first email.. see, guys like to know these things so they can tell the girl what he thinks she wants to hear.. So she says she wants a ltr and wow, thats what you want.. she says she wants a one night stand and wow, thats what you want..

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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:16:46 PM

DarlingSavage

Posts: 2808
Joined: 9/18/2009
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quote:

see, guys like to know these things so they can tell the girl what he thinks she wants to hear.. So she says she wants a ltr and wow, thats what you want.. she says she wants a one night stand and wow, thats what you want..

Oh, I hate that shit!!!

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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:16:56 PM

littlewonder

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how has it worked well for you if you're still single???

And if I had a blank profile and a guy messaged me I'd think he was only messaging me for three reasons....my physical attributes, simply because I'm a slave or because he messages every single woman that shows up on his list....none of which is attractive to me.

< Message edited by littlewonder -- 5/2/2012 3:19:24 PM >

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Post #: 49

RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:18:48 PM

eliotRosewster

Posts: 28
Joined: 4/8/2012
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quote:

If you're a gentleman (lady/honest/non-game player/whatever) you don't need to tell people. They will learn for themselves.

Text is a weird thing. Sometimes things can be misconstrued. It has no tone. People will interpret things the wrong way. I say that I'm a gentleman in hopes that they will read my messages in gentlemanly tone. Which is what is intended.

quote:

Why mention what you think a sub has to earn? In an opening e-mail? Really?

That is something that I usually leave out of the first message. I have no idea why I put that in this time. But I do think a sub has to earn the right for a dom to play with her. Just like a dom has to earn the right to play with a sub.

quote:

Lastly, why are you targetting new, younger, girls. That is another red flag for me.

I'm targeting 21 - 40. I think I'm going to start avoiding anything younger than 24 in the future.

(in reply to DaddySatyr)

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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:20:32 PM

JanahX

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Joined: 8/21/2010
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Women of the highest quality Im sure. How do you know theyre women? Somehow I am thinking otherwise.

You know whats awesome? - Last summer I went on vacation for three months and when I came back - I made a sock just to peek around for a day, to see if I wanted to reactivate my JanahX profile = and the SAME TROLLS hit me up that time as when I joined in 2008. Is it working for you as well as it is for them?

quote:

ORIGINAL: eliotRosewster

quote:

I just wanna know what kind of hotdog ya gonna use. That matters yanno.

I cringe at the hotdog part. I wrote it while talking to a girl about the mental aspect of submission. So the whole hot dog part came out of that. It felt weird writing it in the first place. It felt weird posting it. It still feels weird now. But I've gotten women sending messages to me out of the blue because of that fantasy. I've thought about changing it, but it works. So I've left it.

And to answer your question, Kielbasa!

quote:

Text is a weird thing. Sometimes things can be misconstrued. It has no tone. People will interpret things the wrong way. I say that I'm a gentleman in hopes that they will read my messages in gentlemanly tone. Which is what is intended.

Uh no, wrong again. You just dont know how to write well. Whats the deal with you not taking responsibility for your own miscommunication? You keep saying the same thing - IM misunderstood. No youre not. Youre just kidding yourself is all.

quote:

I have. I'm more active in an online community. I've heard weird things about munches, that have made me feel hesitant about them. I've heard that if you're a dom and sub walking in you're welcomed with open arms. But you might find a more senior dom grabbing your sub's ass, and if you complain they will say that he has more seniority and to lighten up. If you talk to the same senior dom's sub he will get very defensive. Or if you walk as a single man, you're more shunned. Stuff like that. But that's only what I've heard.

If you read everything you have written - people are calling you to task, and you have some kind of excuse for everything. Oh, well this is WHY this is the way THIS is - or I HEARD this, even though I have no idea if its true - but it must BE, because I HEARD about it -

c'mon NOW -

< Message edited by JanahX -- 5/2/2012 3:48:14 PM >

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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:21:25 PM

eliotRosewster

Posts: 28
Joined: 4/8/2012
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quote:

So maybe it was worth taking it up the ass a little bit... lol

I gotta admit. I'm enjoy the new assholes. I have an extra place to put my change!

(in reply to Lockit)

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Post #: 52

RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:21:59 PM

Lockit

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Oh come on now... words do have tone! Many a writer are having a blast with the income their tone presents. Your words did have a tone... a tone many heard and didn't misunderstand. You didn't understand how your words would be heard by another. Stop finding excuses. When most on this thread heard your tone... are you going to say we all misunderstood, read it wrong, have fifth grade reading levels, etc?

Best to walk or run now if you are going to continue to lay blame rather than own your own tone.

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Post #: 53

RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:26:55 PM

eliotRosewster

Posts: 28
Joined: 4/8/2012
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quote:

I think you're missing his point. If it was really working for you, you wouldn't have to be emailing so many others. (That was my take on it anyway.

Unfortunately, I'm in Canada. There are many girls that don't say what part of the country they are in, and it's a big country. So I'll have a great conversation with a girl and she'll end up being on the other side of the country. Or I'll be arranging to meet up with her and I'll find out she's married and the husband doesn't know about her kink. It'll be things like that, that have stopped me from meeting someone.

(in reply to Lockit)

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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:32:35 PM

BurntKitty

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Have you considered attending a munch and meeting different people in person & who are local to you?

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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:33:25 PM

eliotRosewster

Posts: 28
Joined: 4/8/2012
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quote:

Oh come on now... words do have tone!

They do an don't have a tone. "What do you want for dinner?" Did I say that as an accusation? Or did I say that politely? If I said that to you in person I could've said that in an angry voice. But, text leaves itself open for interpretation. Text in general is a poor way of communicating. You can try to gleam things from it.

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Post #: 56

RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:36:07 PM

kalikshama

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Your sample first contact email is so similar to your profile that it feels spammy.

If a woman has nothing in her profile and you are writing anyway, then it seems like the only thing you are interested in is her vagina, which is not gentlemanly.

ps - I hope you are now feeling sufficiently vented to delete that journal entry.

< Message edited by kalikshama -- 5/2/2012 3:42:21 PM >

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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:37:49 PM

eliotRosewster

Posts: 28
Joined: 4/8/2012
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quote:

Have you considered attending a munch and meeting different people in person & who are local to you?

I have. I'm more active in an online community. I've heard weird things about munches, that have made me feel hesitant about them. I've heard that if you're a dom and sub walking in you're welcomed with open arms. But you might find a more senior dom grabbing your sub's ass, and if you complain they will say that he has more seniority and to lighten up. If you talk to the same senior dom's sub he will get very defensive. Or if you walk as a single man, you're more shunned. Stuff like that. But that's only what I've heard.

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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:38:33 PM

DarlingSavage

Posts: 2808
Joined: 9/18/2009
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quote:

"What do you want for dinner?" Did I say that as an accusation? Or did I say that politely?

I never took someone asking me what I want for dinner as an accusation. And words DO have tone. If you go to college and take some business courses, you will learn all about it. I'm guessing you haven't had any higher education and have never taken a class in communication, literature, or writing.

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RE: I need to vent and you might find this funny - 5/2/2012 3:40:55 PM

MoxieRed

Posts: 11
Joined: 9/19/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: eliotRosewster

quote:

Have you considered attending a munch and meeting different people in person & who are local to you?

I have. I'm more active in an online community. I've heard weird things about munches, that have made me feel hesitant about them. I've heard that if you're a dom and sub walking in you're welcomed with open arms. But you might find a more senior dom grabbing your sub's ass, and if you complain they will say that he has more seniority and to lighten up. If you talk to the same senior dom's sub he will get very defensive. Or if you walk as a single man, you're more shunned. Stuff like that. But that's only what I've heard.

Honestly, I'm sure every place is different, but I've had some experience with munches and fetish balls and I've never, ever had an issue with someone being inappropriate toward me, even when my partner / date wasn't near me. I generally find the IRL community to be more polite / well-mannered than the random douches that send me rude letters.

Additionally, I could be wrong, but I feel in your initial post about the forums reaming your ass was unwarranted. I felt everyone was very calm and respectful in giving their opinions.

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